I do not own Hellsing
-

Seras opened her eyes, she listened for anything that might be out of the ordinary. After a few moments she shrugged and rose from the specialised bed that Hellsing had installed for her. After the initial shouting and tantrums that had followed her being forced to sleep in a coffin she had begged Sir Hellsing to find something that married the vampiric tradion with something more modern, the result was the four poster coffin/bed. A four poster bed that literally descended into the floor creating a makeshift metal coffin when the occupant hit the switch, or if that person was asleep, an auto timer for sunrise would make it descend to protect its sleeping occupant.

It was a considerable improvement on comfort, but the true reason she'd needed it was that she hadn't mentioned to anymore she was claustrophobic, the coffin had literally terrified her and rest had been impossible. This way all she had to do was relax and go to sleep.
She idly wondered if like her Master Alucard, she might be able to walk in the direct sunlight.
It was such a hopeful thought that for a moment she was furious at him for not being around to ask, Alucard was gone. She didn't doubt that one day he would return. If 'Dracula' films had taught her anything about the king of vampires it was that he always found a way to come back.
She shrugged and stretched, as she clicked a stiff back a smell invaded her nostrils making her wince - after a few moments she realised it was her clothes which stank of smoke and old blood from last nights ghoul hunting in the English countryside.

Seras shook her head in irritation. She'd have to get changed. She stripped off the clinging garmnet and went to look in the full length mirror to check her hair, contrary to the popular belief that vampires had no reflection she'd had one even after she'd been turned. The shock of seeing fangs had made her scream the first time she'd looked at herself in a handmirror.
"Ooh lah lah, very nice!" a french accented voice purred into her ear.
Seras experienced a sense of deja vu as she screamed at her reflection. It wasn't that there was anything to be repulsed about her appearance, but the ginger haired frenchman who leered appreciatively at her from the mirror was new.
"Pip!" she shrieked "God damn it, don't you knock!" she span around attempting to cover herself as the Frenchman laughed at her from the mirror.
"Where the hell did my reflection go?" She demanded.
The mercanary shrugged and lit a cigarette, "Search me." he replied "But I'm not complaining." he grinned at her.
Seras fumed and her face went red "I need to get dressed! You keep your eyes shut Pip!"
"Awww..." he pouted at her "Can't I watch? I promise I won't talk!"
"No!"
"Not even a quick glance?"
"NO!"
Seras shot a glare at him and he sighed. "Oh all right... I'll close my eyes."
She sighed in relief "Thank you." she grated out. None the less she undressed away from the mirror, the last thing she wanted was for Pip to constantly remind her she'd given him a show, she leant over and picked up a clean uniform.
Then she realised she'd made a terrible mistake, Pip was a mercenary - they weren't known for keeping promises.
To prove the point for her Pip pinched her bum playfully from behind making her yelp.
"You said I had to close my eyes. You said nothing about touching." he warned her with a playful grin, his eye closed as he'd promised "You need to be more specific."
She turned around angrily, her face red with embarrasment.
"PIP!" she shrieked at him.
The Frenchman opened his eye took a long lingering gaze at her naked form and his facelit up "Ah! I knew this solitary existance had to bring with it some perks of the job!"
Seras clobbered him and Pip landed hard on his rear.
"Oww! Jesus! You know, I thought the dead were supposed to be beyond pain...!" he complained.
Seras fumed "You're going to be in a lot more when I'm through with you!" she warned.
The Frenchman's eyes went wide and he scampered quickly back to the safety of the mirror. He turned and blew her a kiss.
"au revoir mon chéri! We must do this again sometime!"
Seras stood shaking with suppressed rage and she muttered "In your dreams."
She was able to finally get changed and then she headed upstairs to deal with the matter of food.

Seras sat alone at a long table, a tall candle lit and a soup spoon and bowl ready next to a bucket of ice and a blood pack.
She understood that food, real food - good wholesome nutritous food was no longer an option for her to enjoy. But she still didn't like blood, the thought of drinking it was still revolting even though she accepted she had to do it for her strength's sake.
With her body craving it with an unholy passion, the sight of it was enough to make her go into a daze and drool despite how she felt on the matter. But fortunately for her she had an understanding Master in Sir Integra, whose family haddealt with such issues before. The Hellsing leader had allowed Seras to use whatever she needed so that she could drink without finding it more awkward than she already did.

So Seras sat here, with her chilled medical bag of blood as her Master Alucard had done before her, she sighed and ripped the top off the bag and poured it into a fine soup bowl.
Finally she settled more comfortably into the chair, composed herself and closed her eyes and after a deep breath she began spooning it as quickly into her mouth as she could, desperately telling herself This is just cold tomato soup, lovely rich tomato soup. It is going to be delicious and creamy and rich...
Despite her best efforts it quickly began to make her gag as she realised what she was doing. However she finally swallowed the last spoonful with an effort and sighed. "There's got to be an easier way..." she complained "Can't they give it any flavour? A touch of salt? A bit of pepper?"
Pip's voice went through her mind, "Oh yes, and perhaps a sprig of rosemary for decoration?"

Pip appeared at her side and shook his head sadly "Wow, that's a rough deal. No fine gourmet for you, eh Seras? Just that, everyday for as long as you live."
Seras wasn't sure if he was being facetious because she'd hit him, or if he was deadpanning.
"Don't remind me" she said bitterly with a depressed sigh.
Pip took a chair next to her, he gave her a curious sideways glance, "Hey you had not problems feeding with my blood Seras. What's the big deal with this stuff? It's even been donated!"
"The first time was different" she said with a sickened look on her face.
"How? Was it because it was mine?" he asked hopefully.
"Not quite Pip," she said with a small smile, the frenchman was genuinly trying to snap her out of it and she apprecaited he wasn't judging her for what she had to do to keep her strength up.

"Aww" the mercenary joked, he walked behind her and rubbed her back "Come on now, no being sick. You need to accept that you need that stuff." his nose crinkled in distaste "Even though it's never going to look nice no matter how much fine china you put it in."
"PIP!" she whined as she was reminded of the taste, she covered her mouth "...I think I'm going to be sick..." she moaned.
"Non! Do not be!" He warned "If you can hold your stomach long enough then I shall hail you as the greatest woman who ever lived!"
Seras shot him an unamused look "I'm a dead vampire remember?"
His gaze went uncertain for a moment, then he chuckled, "Trifles! But let that not bother us for now! I mean look at this scene from another perspective; we have" he looked appreciately at the laid out table "Dinner, candle light..." he leaned in and fixed on her with his best intimate gaze "and our burning desire for one another..." he implied with a purr, as he stroked a hand up her thigh.
As he leaned in Seras hand flicked out to snuff out the single candle light. There was a loud smack.
A solitary lighter clicked and a flame shot into existance, Pip lit a cigarette and rubbed a stinging red cheek, in the back round the door slammed as Seras left the room.
"Ah! But then again, perhaps we do not." he ammened as he sucked in a lungful of smoke.

-
I know a few people are going to say it's an odd ending. But I thought it was funny.
R+R if you care to, thanks for reading.
-Sigmund 17