Masks She Wore

How far would you go to save the one you love? Would the secrets you unveil piece by devastating piece break away at your resolve? Would the truth beneath circumstance change your perspective and your overall decision to bring your beloved back? With doubt and uncertainty clouding your heart, would you be able to follow one simple rule?

Chapter 1: A Period of Mourning

"I remember now," Akihiko tightened his embrace, brushing his cheek against Kieka Arisato's as he relished the familiar warmth in his arms and lap. "Everything that happened."

She lay cradled in his arms, exhausted, on the stone bench. Her legs were outstretched with her heels just reaching the end of their seat. Her slow and even breaths tickled his ear as he continued much to his amusement, "The fighting, Tartarus, all of it and…" He leaned back slightly, memorizing every precious detail before him: the shadows on her pale cheeks cast there by the long lashes of her half lidded eyes, the glossy sheen of her hair in the sunlight, the way her tired smile graced her pink lips, and her eyes, as red as the purest ruby, quivered with unshed tears . They looked so incredibly tired, yet within their scarlet brilliance there was no mistaking that the young woman in his arms regarded him with the same affection as he her.

His grey eyes trembled with emotion as he reached up with a gloved hand to cup her cheek, his thumb gently sliding against the lone fat tear that escaped her lowered lashes. "And… how I fell in love with you."

With that breathy confession did her tears pour forth; she parted her lips yet no words were able to escape. All Kieka could do was helplessly look up at Akihiko who regarded her with such raw and naked adoration, that it took what little breath she had left away. Always was she amazed by this private side of himself that he had only ever shown to her.

He leaned forward, tenderly brushing his lips against hers. "I'm sorry I forgot it all…"

The solitary mechanical maiden, Aigis, watched from the roof's railing, unwilling to interrupt the reunion of sorts, wiping her tears away with her robotic fingers. A gentle breeze brought the shouts and sounds of the other companions' hurried footsteps up the stairwell, signaling that whatever time the two had alone was coming to an abrupt end.

Akihiko could only smile at all the yelling and noise behind them, "Everyone remembers now." He smiled wide as he looked back at the open door, his gloved fingers gently squeezed Kieka. They all managed to remember. Their promise was kept.

Today was… nice.

Perfect.

The sun kissed the top of their heads and the cool spring breeze gently teased their hair. This was their moment, atop the roof of Gekkoukan High. The cherry blossoms could be seen from below as well as the ocean that surrounded the man-made island, its waters shimmering in the light. There would be no more shadows, no more dark hour. All that lay before them was to live out their lives as it was meant to be. As Junpei and the others poured through the roof's exit, Akihiko lowered his lips to Kieka's forehead. He had noticed her eyes were closed, the last of her tears shed and a small smile left on her lips.

"And starting now, we'll never be apart."

-!-!-!-!-

Ever so slowly his eyes dared to open, the deep darkness should have alarmed him, but it was proving to be an all too familiar sight. He knew all too well what was to happen next. His movements came fluidly, as if he was following the script of a well rehearsed play. Tonight, Akihiko Sanada would play his part well. He dusted off his khaki's as he slowly stood up, his feet finding purchase on unseen ground. Hesitantly, he took a step forward. The shattering of glass echoed painfully in his ears, the disquieting shock of it bringing him down to his knees.

With clenched fists and gritted teeth, he painfully endured the girlish peals of laughter as he regained his composure.

"Don't be afraid, big brother."

"He's afraid!"

"Big brother will never rescue me now."

"He'll never have the power to save us. He never could attain the strength he so desperately wanted… All that training done for nothing."

"Never, never?"

"Never, never."

An agonizing wail tore through his throat as he sprinted towards nothing, clawing his way back to his feet. What could he have done? How could he have saved them? What excuses could he muster up? He had been far too young and small to fight his way into the fires to save his sister. Despite the strength he had gained since then, it had still not been enough to withstand Nyx's assault and pull Kieka back before she had taken her leave of him and the rest of S.E.E.S. There was nothing that could be said, for he knew no matter how many syllables of regret he could utter, not a single one would bring his Kie-chan or little sister back.

"He's running away! Don't leave me, big brother!"

"Aki…"

As he ran, two figures, that of a small girl and a young woman, slowly emerged from the darkness. The little girl was as cute as could be, silver hair pulled up in pigtails, her grey eyes were wide with fright as she clung to the edge of the pleated skirt of the older girl beside her. Her small dress was an old and frayed simple hand-me-down from the orphanage she had once stayed. Familiar red stared sadly at Akihiko, as Kieka soothed Miki with a comforting hand, her fingers gently patting the younger girl's silver hair.

"You're too late," Kieka's voice was but a whisper, the devastating words paralyzed Akihiko just as he reached them.

"No! I can do this! Every time, you stop me! Why, Kieka!" His voice cracked; his words full of unbelievable heartbreak.

The small girl looked up to Akihiko; a shy smile adorned her face, a dimple in each cheek. "You've gotten handsome, big brother." Just as her tiny fingers touched the fabric of his pant leg, flames consumed her to ash. An unfeeling Kieka was quickly turned to stone, shortly shattering around him. And he was powerless to stop it all.

Dark lashes flew open as he flung the bedspread off him. Pale fingers cupped his face, as broken sobs wracked through a sweat slicked Akihiko.

The nightmares had become more frequent, but tonight had been the first night that…

Clumsily, a hand searched the bedside table for his cell phone. He dialed a familiar number in the darkness and hastily he brought the phone to his ear. His bedside clock showed 12:01am. He shuddered as he fought to quiet his sobs, a shaky exhale leaving his lips as he rubbed his eyes. The red curtains along his windows were slightly parted, allowing the dim light of a lamppost to sneak in; the fluttering of snowflakes outside caught his attention, their whimsical shadows dancing over his morose face.

The ringing stopped and a gruff voice came from the end of the line in answer, "Again?" The familiar voice comforted Akihiko despite its terse tone.

A pause, "Yeah, it was different this time… than all the others."

There was a grunt, "I can't keep babysitting your ass every time you wet the bed, Aki."

Akihiko wiped his forehead clean of sweat, "Y-yeah I know. Just get over when you can." And with that he shut the phone off and fell back into the sweat dampened bed. For the past year, he had been trying to move forward with his life, something he knew in his heart that she would have wanted.

Upon discovering her true fate as a statue sealing and guarding the golden doors to Nyx from a raging Erebus, an embodiment of negative human emotions, he and the others had promised each other to live positively. They were ready to do anything to help ease the burden that Kieka had taken upon herself, an action she had taken to protect the ones she loved most and held so dear to her heart; even if it meant leaving everyone behind with no hope of respite.

Akihiko could put on a fake smile and pretend for her, but his heart would not be so easily fooled.

Her death had struck such a devastating blow to his psyche.

-!-!-!-!-

"Get out of my way," Shinjiro shoved his way past Akihiko and kicked the door shut, paper grocery bags held effortlessly in his arms. "And stay out of the kitchen."

The silver haired young man rubbed his arms as he fell back against the door, "You didn't have to get anything." The glower shot his way was enough to stop that train of thought, "I hope you don't mind if I watch then…"

The man in the kitchen merely shrugged as he deftly and swiftly organized his cooking ingredients and utensils. Shinjiro hadn't changed at all. If anything, Akihiko had noticed, the dark sullen edge that usually colored his friend's dark brown eyes had been replaced with a fierce unyielding determination.

October fourth was the day Shinji was supposed to have died protecting Ken Amada, but by some miracle of sorts he had held on despite the fact he had faced death head on without looking back. When he awoke from his coma, he had rushed over to the S.E.E.S dorm. That day was, coincidentally, the day Kieka had fallen into her deep sleep. The day after that had been…the day she had passed on.

"So that's how it's going to be," was all Shinji could say. His hushed tone and pained inflection had not been lost on Aki.

After Kieka's death, Shinji had disappeared for a few days. When he had returned to the dorm, he had remained a stoic pillar of strength. Since then he had been at his friend's side at a moment's notice, regardless of what situation he was currently in, something Akihiko had been thankful for.

The lone wolf started attending classes again, taking any extra credit he could get to graduate by the end of the spring semester. Once the certificate had been in his hand, he had enrolled in culinary school.

"You didn't eat, right?" Gruff tones broke Akihiko out of his musing.

The young man shook his head as a hand rubbed the plains of his abdomen, the fabric of his shirt crinkling slightly along with the movement, "I had forgotten."

"Idiot."

Akihiko pushed himself away from the unyielding wood of his door and made his way to the island counter of his kitchen. As he sat himself on the stool, Shinjiro stood in the middle of the kitchen, his hair tied back and a red apron around his waist, skillfully twirling a spatula in his hand. The ingredients had been expertly chopped and liquids carefully measured. Pork was already sautéing in vegetable oil while onions, carrots, and potatos and other ingredients patiently waited nearby.

"Smells good. What are you making?" Aki folded his arms neatly before him, leaning forward to get a better view.

Shinji carefully eyed the pork, "Nikujaga. And I don't want to hear you bitching about the curry."

Aki wisely kept his mouth shut.

"So, tell me, what happened?" The cook turned his back to Aki as he added the potato quarters, onion wedges, and bite sized carrot chunks into the pot, the oil sizzling in protest.

The young man at the counter lowered his lashes, slowly resting his chin on the back of his hands, the edge of the counter biting at his elbows. "They died this time."

"How?"

Akihiko's brow creased in agitation, not wanting to recall the details. He recalled his young, sweet sister's skin blistering in the heat of the fire, seeing it melt her away into nothing. He could see Kieka's unfeeling expression turn to stone and then crumble below his fingertips. Together, their screams whispered in his ears.

"Miki burned to ash. Kie-chan was turned to stone."

There was a pregnant pause, Shinjiro's attention never leaving that of the food. "After dinner, we're heading to the shrine."

Akihiko's silver eyes darkened, he knew a challenge when he heard one. "Why?"

Shinjiro quickly turned his back to the food, pointing the spatula accusingly at his friend. He looked directly into Aki's eyes, holding his gaze hostage while the corners of his lips dipped into a stern frown, "When was the last time you talked to her? Made your peace?" He arched an eyebrow.

"Not s-since the funeral." Akihiko's ears felt like they were burning, and he couldn't help but drop his gaze to the counter, studying the blue tile intently. Guilt and shame weighed heavily on his shoulders.

Something akin to a sneer briefly washed over Shinji's face as he returned to cooking his food, "You're such an asshole."

The boxer slammed his fists on the counter in response, "What was that?"

"You heard me." The man in the kitchen added curry to the sauté, not caring what buttons he pushed. "Sit your ass back down on that stool; I'm not in the mood."

Begrudgingly, Akihiko sank down to his seat, fists clenched as he glared at the counter before him. He knew in his heart that he wasn't really angry with Shinji… and perhaps Shinjiro knew that as well. Akihiko remained seated there in sullen silence until his childhood friend carefully finished cooking their meal.

-!-!-!-!-

Snow crunched beneath their feet as they climbed the steep stairs toward Naganaki Shrine. Silence had been their companion for the duration of the car ride, "Kimi No Kioku" had been playing on the radio and neither had the heart to change the station. Snow dusted their hair, the misty clouds of their breath puffed around with each of their exhales.

A handmade scarf was snuggly wrapped around Aki's neck.

Akihiko could hear each step with excruciating clarity. He didn't want to be here, the sense of dread and foreboding was ensnaring his legs, acting as chains until finally their weight made him come to a standstill. He overlooked the shrine with uneasiness.

Shinjiro stopped in his tracks, "I ain't holding hands with you to make sure you keep up like a good little boy. Step it up."

"When was the last time you were here, Shinji?"

"Yesterday," his gruff reply held a hint of agitation.

"And before that?"

The taller man, warily eyed the boxer from the corner of his eye, his lips were pursed in a thin line, "The day before and so on and so forth." And with that, Shinjiro thrust his cold hands into the warm pockets of his burgundy pea coat, walking onward and leaving behind a shamed Akihiko.

Snowflakes gently caressed Akihiko's cheeks as he stood there, the memory of Kieka closing her eyes for the final time fresh in his mind. She had been oblivious to his sweet endearments, lost beyond time and sense to the gates of Nyx. Aki could clearly remember the tears that had welled in her eyes as she looked up at him, the meaning behind their apologetic message completely ignored by his selfish joy.

Gloved fingers shook the snow off his hair, smoothing the edges before he continued on.

Second floor, fourth compartment to the right... Shinjiro was staring at the small digital screen before him, a picture of a cheerful Kieka gazing back. The picture was something an aunt or another distant relative had supplied for the funeral. Mitsuru had insisted on paying for the funeral fees, something those remaining of the Arisato family wouldn't decline. Yet, once all the preparations had been made and the funeral service completed, not a single one had come to visit Kieka's remains. Rumors of the now deceased branch of their family being unlucky or cursed had been quietly whispered among the remaining Arisatos during the wake, something the rest of the family members didn't want to catch.

It pissed Shinji off.

Akihiko ascended the last step with trepidation. He carefully stepped onto the threshold. Shinji remained standing before the final resting place of Kieka, hands in his pockets and shoulders slumped.

"I'd think out of all us, you'd have been the one to visit her most." Shinji's words echoed in the hall. "I think Ken comes by at least twice a week. I know the girls do so every so often." His head sharply turned to Aki, motioning with a slight shrug to head on over.

With slow and steady steps Aki was finally there. He stared at the touch screen monitor, options to look at past pictures of the deceased or to leave a message shining brightly. The two men simply stood there, gazing where she remained. Time stoically marched on.

A tired sigh escaped Shinjiro's lips as he scratched at the back of his neck, "I'll be waiting in the car. Take your time."

Akihiko jerked his head up, "Why don't I just go with you now?"

"You ain't allowed to leave until you speak to her. Get it all out." Shinjiro pulled up his collar and shoved his hands into his pocket. "I better see an additional message when I come tomorrow." He started to head down the stairs, his footsteps echoing lightly, "or your ass is getting beat straight to hell."

Grimacing in protest, Akihiko shook his head as thumb and forefinger pinched the bridge of his nose. What could he say?

Kieka emerged in his drifting thoughts: her cheerful smile, how he could get lost in her eyes, the way she'd sit and listen intently, and how her hair had always seemed to smell of strawberries. She had been something alright. He looked up helplessly at the screen. With a hesitant hand he reached up, forefinger hovering over the option he knew he needed to choose.

Oh how he missed her.

His finger descended, its destination reached.

A soothing voice, though its inflections were flat, echoed throughout the hall, "Please wait until the beep to begin recording your message. Thank you." A few beats passed, thought it seemed an eternity, and then… BEEP!

"Ah… H-hey there," Aki clenched his fists, hating how awkward he sounded. "It's, it's been a long time hasn't it?" He smiled inwardly at his question, knowing that of course there would be no response, "Time sure does fly doesn't it?" He lowered his eyes, observing the slight scuff mark on the wall just below the monitor. "Yeah…

"I'm sorry that I… haven't visited here at all. I always meant to. I just… I don't know. I couldn't bring myself to come here. But just because I haven't been here doesn't mean I don't care or anything. I do. A great deal."

He licked his lips as he continued, eyes never straying from the monitor. "It's been hard you know? Trying to move on, but I've been doing my best, things considering. First year of college is mostly done with. Thought about dropping boxing as a possible career; doesn't mean I won't still get in the ring." He smiled though it didn't meet his eyes, "Gotta keep in top shape, right?"

Akihiko crossed his arms, gloved hands rubbing his sleeves to warm himself despite the coat and scarf he wore. "Maybe I might lend a hand at being part of something bigger. Perhaps an officer like Kurosawa-San or hell maybe even Interpol." His smile faded as he lowered his eyes, hands slowly coming to a rest on each elbow, "It's been pretty hard to concentrate, you… y-you're there every day in my thoughts and my dreams."

He paused, fighting back the tears that threatened to pour forth. Aki was so tired of crying and least of all he didn't want to do it now, not when he was trying to "speak" with her.

Akihiko sniffed and continued on despite the painful lump in his throat, "I guess… you know I was pretty angry with you once we all found out you did what you did." The mental image of Kieka turned to stone, arms outstretched and affixed before large golden doors as Erebus clawed at the stone to breach the entrance flashed in his mind. "I mean I understand I think but I wish I had been there to help carry that burden alongside you that way you," his voice fell into a pained whisper, "wouldn't have to be alone."

He tilted his head back, dark grey eyes looking at the monitor through lowered lashes. He shifted his weight from foot to foot, agitated. "I'd do anything to have you back here, anything to be able to hold you, kiss you. Tell you I love you again." His hand reached up to rake his fingers through his hair, but they came to rest at his temple as he thought back to each moment they shared. The first time they met in the dorm, the time he came to his senses in the hotel on Shirakawa Boulevard only to find himself clad in merely a short towel and stroking the cheek of a blushing Kieka, to the roof of Gekkoukan High where he had asked her to be his girl and she had accepted.

The lights flickered briefly; Kieka's monitor however remained constant, though Akihiko paid it no mind.

"I feel like I took all our time for granted and there's no way to go back and treasure each and every second as I should have or … hell, even change the past but… I'm thankful for the memories. So thankful…" Tears began to slide down his face and he couldn't help but laugh. He was plenty appreciative Shinji had left him in peace or he was sure he'd never hear the end of it.

Aki managed a chuckle as he wiped away at his eyes, "I guess Shinji having to drag me here is proof I never really deserved you, you… who were so kind and gentle and knew how to take the lead so fearlessly and effortlessly." He rested his forehead against the smooth marble before him, his eyes studying the toe of his shoe. "You were the one that brought us all together, helped us when we were down and for some reason along the way you chose me."

He placed a gloved palm on the locked door just above the monitor, her cremated remains sealed behind it, "Thank you for that."

There was a pause as he sniffed.

"When you left us, you were smiling. It was so tired but it held a hint of peace … You looked so beautiful and that smile? I'll never forget it for as long as I live." He stared at the picture with red rimmed eyes, her cheerful face looking back.

"I love you, Kieka, and even if it means we'll never see each other whether it be in this life or the next… I don't think I could ever stop loving you. You've left your mark and," he placed a hand over his heart, fingers tightly clutching at his coat, as if covering a wound that threatened to burst open, "somehow some way," his voice cracked as he began to sob yet he continued on, his throat aching with each word uttered, "I'll be a man worthy of that love you gave so freely. I swear it."

-!-!-!-!-

A gentle knock on the passenger car window was all Shinjiro needed to hear to unlock the doors. He studied Akihiko as he climbed in. Snow was barely noticeable in his white hair, his eyes were red and puffy, and his cheeks were flushed from the cold. Once Akihiko fastened his seatbelt, Shinji turned the key. The car started without a hitch.

The drive to the apartment had been a quiet one. The radio this time had been turned off. Aki glanced down at the radio clock; the time shone a quarter to three.

"It's pretty late," Aki leaned back in his seat as he observed the changing of scenery along the way home. All was quiet, most places dark and the moon was nearly full. "I got an extra blanket and pillow you can use."

Shinjiro merely grunted, his hands relaxing on the steering wheel, "I hope you don't expect breakfast."

Akihiko merely smiled, knowing just what to say. He rubbed his eyes as he fought back a yawn. "Nah, don't worry about it. I have a stash of protein bars I usually eat before a run."

The man behind the wheel could only snort in disgust, "I honestly don't see how you can keep ingesting that shit. Just so you know we're going to the store in the morning. After breakfast though I gotta jet. Test coming up."

"Ah right," the young boxer adjusted his scarf yet stopping midway as he glanced at Shinjiro. "Thanks for coming over and… taking me over here."

"Yup."

The rest of the car ride was in silence and that night, after so long, Akihiko finally had a deep and dreamless sleep.

Phew! I meant to have this up a few days ago but I kept getting dragged into that place in the world they call "outside." Scary place! I juggled the names Hamuko and Minako around... annnnd I just couldn't do it. T_T Everytime I see Minako I think of Sailor Venus and knowing how the japanese fanbase came up with Hamuko from a screenshot (and that it makes me think of bacon .) I went ahead and kept the surname of the male protagonist from the persona 3 manga but decided to use the first name I chose for my initial playthrough. I know different names for the same character through out different fics can be a bit ugh but yeah. You have my apologies!

Anyways a big shout out to my best friend and beta IceyCold. You are my muse, my goddess of all things awesome. Without you, this chapter would be incoherent with ramblings of daisies randomly thrown around within the text. She plucked them all. I need to buy her a vase. T_T

All in all I hope you guys enjoyed this. It has begunnnnn /insanecackle. See you all next chapter. :)

-LW