~Ways to Get Out of Doing Paperwork~

Ne Kaida-chan...
Nnn? How old are you?
-_-* you shouldn't be asking that. it's rude to ask a young womans age...
Gomennasai Kaida-néesan!
Sigh... Could you please do the honors Al?
Demo néesan. I thought it wasn't an honor.
*walks out of room* T-T I'm younger then Al after he changed back. IM NOT OLDER THEN 18! I'm older than 12 though. moving on~ OI MAES!
Ah. Kaida~chan I was just looking for you! LOOK AT THE CUTE PICT-
Maes. Please. Just. I'll listen to you later as long as you tell our dear readers. the. the dreaded sentence. *shudder*
OK ^_^ Kaida-chan does not own FMA. she just owns the plot. the country. the worl-
MAES THAT WAS NOT ON THE SCRIPT! if you continue say goodbye to your Elysia pictures *hiss*
hai hai. T-T
~ON WITH THE CRACK STORY!~

WARNING! BE PREPARED TO GET SHOT AT BY HAWKEYE SHOULD YOU TRY THESE AROUND HER!

1) Feign Injury

… Lt. Hawkeye threatened to give Roy a real injury…

2) Feign sick

Hawkeye glared at him. Then realized he wasn't faking it… No one can puke that much and fake it…

3) RUN AWAY!

Mustang's pride was too great to let him run away. So he had to suffer while his subordinates ran.

4) Hide & Seek: Hide Hawkeye's weapons

Apparently Lt. Hawkeye always kept a gun on her person since there was a Roy-shaped bullet-hole pattern on the wall. Riza knew what he did because of the strange grin on his face and lack of scared subordinates.

5) Not come to work

After Roy came back from his 3 day "vacation" he couldn't find his desk. It was literally buried.

"The papers are due tonight Sir."

6) Suicide Plan 1

Lt. Hawkeye came back from lunch a little depressed because of the lack of ketchup. Then she noticed the red and blue body on the floor.
"Sir… I won't ask… But I'm going to have to ask you to get up and finish your woek because its due in an hour.

7) Give up

"Lieutenant I'm not signing another piece of paper today!

"Fine"

"Seriously?"

*click* BANG! AAA- eh? *thud*

Hawkeye smiled at the unconscious Colonel who fainted thinking the suction cup on his forehead was a bullet.

8) Suicide Plan 2

….

"Oi! Fullmetal!"

"What do you want, you smirking buffoon". (-insert word of choice here)

"You're still short, 'cuz I can't see you over the pile of paperwork on my desk."

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING TOO SHO-"

BANG! BANG!

"Fullmetal, the Colonel here is busy. Could you give me your report instead?"

"Yes ma'am." *walks out of room with horrified expression*

"Colonel?"

"Yes?"

"Get back to work or I won't miss on purpose."

"Go ahead, shoot me. I don't care." *shrugs*

"It won't be a kill shot, Sir."

"AARGH!"

9) Play dead!

Needless to say it just so happened that Hayate was in that day. Hayate has been trained to stare at dead people/animals. Therefore the Colonel's plan was foiled when Hayate barked at him.

10) POOL PARTY!

The Colonel and subordinates waited until the pile of papers was enormous. Then pushed it off their desks and started "swimming". They all had fun, until Hawkeye walked in to get her book. She decided to stay and watch them clean up so they could get back to work.

THE END

Soo? How was it? I hope it was funny. I wrote this a looong time ago. So I've been waiting to post it. Please R&R arigato gozimasu!