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Chapter 4

Xander was very thankful. He was thankful because he'd actually ended up staying with Minister Ryan. This, of course, meant he got out of having to tell his friends about what had happened, for a couple of days anyway. But eventually he'd have to show up for school. He had pretty good attendance at school, not wanting to miss the stuff happening with his friends and the demon of the week. Missing too much stuff with the everyday activities on the hellmouth would not be good. Eventually he'd have to return and deal with things.

He was still freaking about Giles maybe being his dad. Or Ethan… How was he supposed to deal with that? He wasn't even sure he could look at Giles knowing that he'd at least been present when he was conceived. That he'd slept with his mother. That he'd been in an orgy with Ethan and his mother. That… Xander paused and took deep calming breathes. You'd think after discovering vampires and demons were real that he'd find it easier dealing with stuff without hyperventilating. This was his 7th time today. If he was this bad, how was he going to handle school tomorrow?

Willow would take one look at him and know something was up. He wasn't ready to tell anyone what he'd found out and he didn't really want to lie to anyone either. He was pretty sure he could get out of details because, you know, his 'dad' was in jail, his mother was in the hospital, and Angelus was on the loose. But even his best diversions weren't going to work if he was hyperventilating. As it was the stuff happening in his family would be barely enough to cover for his lack of appearances since battle with the Judge.

Xander sighed, removing all the air he could from his lungs before sucking in as much as he could. They had more important things to deal with than figuring out who his father was, he wasn't even ready to tell Giles that there was a chance he was his father. Xander Giles. Xander Rayne. He went into a meditation stance; well what he thought was one anyway. Breathe in. At least he wasn't a Harris. Breathe out. His father was either his high school librarian with a secret job as guide to super powered girl, or a guy who turns people into their Halloween costumes and kidnaps said super powered girl and forces a tattoo on her. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in.

A certain minister couldn't help the snicker that came out of him when he went over to tell Xander it was time for dinner. Xander was slumped over slightly from a sitting position on the floor of his living room, snoring. He'd been enjoying the time spent with the teen. He knew Xander wasn't telling him everything about being a vampire hunter or why he kept walking in on him breathing in and out of a paper bag. Ryan knew however that there were normally dark reasons behind anyone's desire to become a hunter. As it was, he was one of the few priests that stuck around in Sunnydale, some knowing and some not knowing choose to leave they just knew they didn't want to stay here. Most of those who knew liked to pretend they didn't know, often those who tried to tell people had one last fatal close encounter with a 'gang member of PCP'.

Xander looked up as he heard a polite cough. He rose up as his stomach let out a demanding grumble. His hand rubbing against his neck slightly as he looked just a little to the side as he avoided looking into the grinning face of Minister Ryan. Xander walked silently next to him as they approached the waiting food. Xander smiled at the simple but homemade food in front of him. He was used to eating microwavable food, even when his mother was sober enough to cook she didn't normally but any effort into it. Although Xander was still a little embarrassed he thanked Ryan politely for both the food and letting him stay with him over the weekend.

"You're welcome Xander," Ryan said as Xander began to inhale the food set before him. He chuckled slightly. "Your enthusiasm is appreciated, I don't believe anyone has ever enjoyed a meal I made so much."

Xander glanced up, his mouth full of food and gave him a wide smile, with his lips thankfully closed. Willow had, after all, trained him well… Well enough that he didn't talk with his mouth full anyway.

"You know," Minister Ryan began as Xander finished off his plate, "eventually you'll have to talk to someone about whatever is bothering you. You must have friends who would allow you to stay with them."

Looking at his empty plate, Xander silently picked it up along with his glass and headed into the kitchen. Perhaps Ryan was someone he could confide in, there was no way he could handle tomorrow without bursting everything out to someone, and he wasn't sure Willow could handle this with everything else happening. Xander washed the dishes absent mindedly for several minutes before he realized what he was doing and placed it on a rack to dry off. Xander stared at the sink as thoughts bombarded him until Ryan finally entered the room with his own dishes. Xander stared at him, almost blank faced before sighing, "Can I talk to you?"

End – Chapter 4

REVIEWS INSPIRE ME

I got a full time job in August, however I kept one of my part time jobs, so I've been working almost every single day that wasn't a holiday… I've had a lot of ideas during this time, my muse won't leave me alone when I don't have time to write! It's so mean! Recently I've received several reviews asking me to work on stuff and I'll try to work on some of them while I'm off from work for Christmas and New Years.