This chapter is by far my favorite because of what happens. Dressing people up is fun considering what's gonna happen to them.

.*.

Last time: "You just have to go to my house and ask Shawn for Skittles," Alexis replied, smiling.

"That's…not bad," Adam said, crossing his arms.

"And you have to do it dressed like me," Jeff added with a grin of his own. "Ring attire. Face paint and all."

"Do we have to dye our hair?" Adam asked.

Jeff thought about it for a second. "You don't have to," he decided.

Both older men swallowed thickly. It wasn't that they had to dress up like Jeff and go ask Shawn for Skittles, it was what would happen if Shawn found out about what Adam had his baby sister do and that Matt did nothing to stop it.

"Come on," Alexis said, grabbing Adam's arm as Jeff grabbed Matt's. They pulled them upstairs to Jeff's room. The two older sat on the bed as the two younger dug through the closet. "I dress Adam, you dress Matt?" Alexis asked, tossing aside a skin-tight black tanktop. Jeff nodded, reaching under an old pair of his jeans.

"Matty, take your pants off and put these on," Jeff said, tossing a pair of black pants to his brother.

"Fuck," Matt mumbled, sliding off his sweats and holding up the pants Jeff had tossed him.

"What?" Adam leaned back on his hands, kicking his shoes off.

"Lexy can fit into Jeff's clothes," Matt explained. "She's about the same size as him, maybe a little smaller. We're bigger than both of them. These are gonna look like they're painted on."

Adam swallowed again as a pair of red pants hit his chest. "Put those on," Alexis ordered, holding up a black fishnet T-shirt before tossing it to the side.

"Fuck, Jeff! These pants are gonna kill me!" Matt gasped, finally fastening the pants.

"Diet," Alexis suggested.

"Exercise," Jeff added, handing the elder Hardy a bright blue studded belt.

"Damn it!" Adam cursed with a slight gasp as he fastened his own pants. Alexis and Jeff just laughed. Adam and Matt tried to breathe properly, stripping their shirts off when Alexis and Jeff turned around with new ones. "You've gotta be fucking kidding me," the Canadian muttered.

Jeff handed Matt a skin tight light blue long sleeved shirt, a tight black tanktop going over it. Alexis handed Adam a tight black mesh shirt with no sleeves. They let the elders keep their regular shoes, but that was about it. After the shirts were forced on and threatened to cut off oxygen, 2 pairs of Jeff's signature arm socks were given to Adam; red under black. Matt, having a long sleeved shirt on, didn't need any.

"Jeff?" Alexis looked through a drawer, pushing Skittle packs and hair dye out of the way. "Where's your face paint?"

"Didja check the bottom drawer?" Jeff asked. He was sitting behind Matt, pulling his brother's hair into a bun. Adam was next; his hair was going to be in pigtails.

"Not there," she replied, closing the drawers.

"When's the last time we used it?"

They both thought about it before grinning. "Itchweed's crib," they said simultaneously.

"What were you doing there?" Matt asked. "We haven't done Itchweed in a while."

"We weren't doing it for the Hardy Show," Alexis said. "We needed a quiet place where no one would think of looking for us and we brought face paint because you and Jeff had a photo shoot soon."

"Remember?" Jeff asked when Matt looked confused. "Lexy came with me and we both smelled like pine trees?" Matt's expression didn't change. "The photographer thought she was replacing Lita and we were getting Team Xtreme back together?"

"I wondered why your face paint looked different," Matt muttered.

"Yeah, good," Alexis teased.

"Hey!" Jeff lightly slapped her arm.

"Oh, sorry. What I mean to say was…yeah, it was good." She laughed as Jeff tackled her to the floor, the two of them rolling around within seconds.

"Is it wrong I'm getting off on watching this?" Adam asked, shifting uncomfortably.

"Yes, because it's my baby fucking brother and Shawn's baby fucking sister!" Matt growled, tackling the blonde to the bed.

Jeff and Alexis sat up when they heard the bed move and saw Matt trying to strangle Adam. "Think we should stop them?" Alexis asked. Jeff nodded. She grinned, whispering something in her friend's ear. "Go for it."

Jeff stood up, leaning over the bed. "Matty?" he asked innocently, tapping his brother's back. Matt turned around, forgetting Adam in favor of seeing what his brother wanted, only to find himself locking lips with the Enigma.

"Hardycest," Alexis said, shrugging when Adam looked over at her.

"Let's go get your faces painted," Jeff said, sliding back off the bed to join his friend on the floor.

Matt and Adam just stared as the two youngest blondes walked out of the room. "What just happened here?" they yelled at the same time. When they go no answer, Matt growled low in his throat and walked out of the room, Adam following a few seconds later.

x-x-x-x-x-x

Matt and Adam followed in silences as they walked to Itchweed's Crib in the woods behind Matt's house. Jeff and Alexis walked a bit further ahead, talking to each other about what they wanted to do with face paint.

Adam almost stopped short when he saw the two youngest walk into a seemingly run-down wooden cabin. "We're actually going in that piece of shit cabin?" he asked.

Matt rolled his eyes, practically shoving the other into the cabin. "Don't be a baby," he muttered, sitting on a crate as Jeff and Alexis dug through a small bag of face paint. "Me and Jeff built this with our dad. It's safe."

"Um, I do Matt, you do Adam?" Alexis asked, popping the top off some purple paint. Adam shifted slightly.

x-x-x-x-x-x

Jeff and Alexis stepped back a little, admiring their work. Matt's forehead was completely blue, symmetrical black and white lines streaking down his face. There was some more blue on his chin and just under his eyes. Adam's was basically the same design but instead of blue, it was red paint and some of the lines headed in different directions.

"Esta bonita," Alexis said with a smile.

"Es—what?" Matt asked.

"It's Spanish," she said, shrugging. "Means it's pretty or beautiful or something. Eddie used to teach me when I came to shows with Shawn."

"Does everyone in the WWE completely love you?" Adam muttered.

"Big Show doesn't really," the blonde replied, she and Jeff cleaning up. "He kinda thinks I'm a brat. Other than that, everyone loves me. To quote someone, ''Cause I'm Lexy Michaels…'"

Jeff chimed in to join her. "'And I'm awesome!'"

"And now Mike has poisoned my brother," Matt said, standing up. "Great."

"Let's go," Alexis said, still smiling.

x-x-x-x-x-x

"All you have to do is ask Shawn for Skittles and you're done," Alexis reminded the two oldest.

Jeff held up a bag. "Your clothes are here," he said. "You can change after and wash the paint off."

"Ready?" Matt asked.

"To be the total laughing stock of the company?" Adam asked back. "Yeah." Matt rang the doorbell.

"Hunter!" Silence. "Hunter! The door!"

"And why can't you get it?"

"'Cause I need my rest!"

Hunter gave a small grin as he walked past Shawn who was currently lying on his stomach on the couch. "You big baby," he teased, giving the older a light smack on the ass.

"It's my house and I can make you get the door if I want to," Shawn argued.

"Actually, it's my house. You're just here 'cause I'm nice."

Shawn immediately stood up, a smile on his face. "Lexy!" he exclaimed happily, bringing his sister into a tight hug. Then he got all 'big brother' on her. "Alexis Shawn Hickenbottom, where were you?"

"Shawn," Alexis whined. She'd always hated when he used her real name. "I told you. I went to see Jeff and Matt. We were gonna play Win The Shot, Call The Spot. Remember?"

"So the game's over, then?" Hunter asked.

Alexis grinned. "Of course not." She waved at the door. "We were just going through with losing conditions."

Hunter burst out laughing when Matt and Adam walked inside. "Shawn, may we have Skittles?" they asked together.

"Alright, we said it, now give us our fucking clothes," Adam growled.

Alexis laughed with Jeff as he tossed them their clothes. "Fi-First room on the right," she got out as the two eldest headed down the hallway.

"Alexis Shawn Hickenbottom," Shawn said, amused, but still pissed about something. "What did I tell you about drinking games with Adam?"

"You can't tell me that wasn't funny," Alexis giggled. Shawn didn't look too amused. "You and Hunter can join us if you want. We can play here."

"We're in," the Game agreed before Shawn could say anything. He patted the Showstopper on the back. "Come on, Shawn, lighten up a little. Adam hasn't done anything or you would know, right?"

"Have her as your sister where she's catching the eye of every guy in the locker room at one time or another and she doesn't seem to care that all of them want to teach her some moves," Shawn said with a small sigh.

"Did Mark call?" Alexis asked, walking backwards to face her brother.

"Baby Bourne called," Hunter said. Her face fell slightly, hands moving into her pockets.

Shawn gave a small smile, his arm going around his sister's shoulders. He hated to see her sad. "He didn't call," he started, "but that doesn't mean he didn't come over."

Alexis lit up, she and Jeff immediately racing into the kitchen to find Mark leaning against the counter with an open can of Pepsi in his hand. "Daddy!" the two blondes exclaimed happily, hugging the Deadman as tightly as they could.

Mark smiled, setting his soda behind him and patting both on the head. "Nice to see you, chipmunks," he said, using his petname for the baby Michaels and the baby Hardy. He quickly finished his soda before tossing the can in the garbage. "Tell Phil he needs to bring over more Pepsi later."

"Is he still trying to get you to go straight-edge?" Matt walked into the kitchen with Adam right behind him, nodding at Mark in a silent hello.

Alexis nodded, smiling. "But Punkers knows he'll never accomplish that," she said. "I wouldn't be able to play Win The Shot, Call The Spot properly if he did."

"Or celebrate with me," Jeff added.

"Right, or celebrate with Jeffy."

"Can I speak to my sister?" Shawn interrupted, turning all eyes to him. "Without you," he pointed at Adam, "Matt, or Jeff."

"Come on, Jeffro," Matt said, gently pushing his brother forward. "Let's give them some privacy."

"But I wanna see what happens!" Adam whined, following the brothers out. Smack! "Ow! Damn it, Hardy!"

Alexis covered her mouth to stop laughing. "Just for the record, did you get pictures of the two stooges out there all dolled up?" Hunter wondered. Alexis smiled, nodding as she tossed the blonde a camera.

"I'm here for all your blackmailing needs," she grinned, bowing her head slightly. "Also included are pictures of Punk drinking a beer, Randy in a tutu dancing ballet, JoMo and Miz having sex in Jericho's locker room, Evan crying when Cody and Ted forced him to stand on the edge of their hotel roof and look down, Adam drunk off his ass and grinding with Cena, and many, many more. Just call (509) LEXY-MAIL to hire my services."

"Shawn, can I buy your sister?" Hunter asked, eyes lighting up in joy as he flipped through the pictures on the camera.

"Hunter!" Shawn hissed, slapping the other's arm. "Not helping!"

Hunter quickly stuffed the camera in his pocket and looked down at his feet. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"What is this about, Shawn?" Mark asked. He'd moved to stand behind Alexis and was looking over her at the two older blondes with his arms crossed.

"Alexis, when was the last time you went to a show?" Shawn asked.

"Um…" Alexis thought about it for a second. "About a month and a half ago."

"In the audience?"

"Uh, no. I've always been backstage because you didn't want me alone with people you didn't know or trust."

"Pay-per-view?"

"All that I could go to, all backstage."

"Have you ever been in or beside the ring during a show?"

"Well, yeah. On your birthday, you had a show. I came out to wish you a happy birthday and give you a hug."

"Ever fought before? Against a real opponent?"

"Not on the show, technically. I've fought before in the ring unaired against Cody once. You've taught me to defend myself against bigger opponents and all the guys in the locker room and so has everyone else. Why?"

"Beat me in a round and I'll tell you."

"But—"

"Are you guys done yet?" Adam called from the living room.

"Come on it!" Shawn called. Mark raised an eyebrow. He had seen Vince talking with the Heartbreak Kid a few days earlier and was suspicious that it had something to do with the Heartbreak Girl.

"Who's playing?" Jeff asked, he and Alexis sitting on stools as Matt brought out the vodka Jeff had stuffed in with their clothes.

"Me and Mark," Hunter said with a grin. He'd stayed at Alexis's house long enough to know where shot glasses were kept and brought 7 out. "You're going down, Deadman." The shots were filled.

"Go!"

.*.

I really like this chapter. It's long and it makes me laugh. And you'll find out what Shawn wants to tell Alexis in a chapter or so.

I'm actually thinking of making a side story that goes off on that later. I'll post the name of it when I get a chapter or two up.

And in other news, I will hopefully have a new story up called "The Enigma's Playlist" by the beginning of next week.