A/N

Hi! So, this is my very first fanfic! It's Perryshmirtz! It's also on deviantart if you want to go check it out over there :) Constructive criticism is appreciated! The beginning is kind of cliche, but trust me, it gets better.

Disclaimer: Phineas and Ferb © Dan Povenmire and Swampy Marsh

It was a clear, sunny day in the city of Danville. The birds were singing, the kids were laughing, and everything seemed right with the world. Today was the perfect day to do something out of the ordinary.

Of course, for Phineas and Ferb, everyday was a good day to something out of the ordinary. It didn't matter if it was rain or shine, they would not let a day of the all too short summer go to waste. Today, they were trying to break the record for the World's Largest Pinball Machine after going to the arcade. Delivery trucks were already starting to pour into the little suburban neighborhood as the boys began to build their wild invention.

"Phineas!" Candace yelled at her younger brother. It was funny how she never asked Ferb. "What on Earth are you doing!"

"We're building the World's Largest Pinball Machine! Wanna help?" Phineas replied cheerfully.

Candace glared. "No! I'm calling mom! You are going to be so BUSTED!"

Candace went through this same routine every time her brothers did something extravagant. She knew for a fact that her mother would call her crazy. She knew that at the end of the day, when her mother came home, everything the boys had been doing would disappear, and she would look even crazier than she sounded on the phone. But for some reason, she couldn't stop herself from dialing her mother's phone number. Candace always felt that there was some hope that her mother would finally believe her.

However, this time was no different. When Candace heard her mother's voice on the other line, she immediately started shouting the boys' plans into the phone. Her mother shrugged it off, hung up the phone, and Candace was left, staring angrily at the device.

Perry the platypus was lying on the grass next to the side of the house, watching the usual day's events unfold. He was so glad the Major had chosen this house as his cover. The boys were eager, even from the first day they picked Perry up at the pet store, to have adventures and make sure no day was a boring one. It made for an interesting way to spend his time when he wasn't off doing a mission. It was really quite relaxing.

Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end. A small beeping noise made its way into Perry's ears, signaling he was being called to do a mission. Perry shot up from four legs on to two, and put his signature hat on his head. He put his back up to the side of the house and pounded his right fist on it. A small door opened and Perry slipped inside. He was carried down a series of elaborate tubes before being dropped, none to gently, onto a seat in front of a huge monitor.

"Oh, there you are Agent P," a man - Major Monogram - said. "Sorry about interrupting your day off, but we have some serious business with Doctor Doofenshmirtz." He paused a moment, as if he was waiting for something. Suddenly, he shouted, "Karl! Where's the fancy animation that explains the stuff Doofenshmirtz stole!"

"Oh. Sorry, sir." a man, sounding considerably younger than the Major, said off screen. Almost instantly, a 'fancy animation' was played.

"As you can see from this footage, Doofenshmirtz has been stealing a lot of evil devices and contraptions. I want you to find out what he's up to, and put a stop to it," Monogram ordered.

Perry saluted to the screen, and before he knew it, was pulled back up the tubes into a launch area to where his vehicle was. He jumped inside, started her up, and was soon on his way to stop Doofenshmirtz's evil plans.

It obviously didn't take long for him to get there. He'd done this only about a thousand times before, each ending with Doofenshmirtz's own stupidity leading to his downfall. Perry wondered why they Major had him even go and stop his plans in the first place. As soon as he was close enough to the familiar tower, Perry jumped off the side of the vehicle and busted through the window of Doofenshmirtz's lair (if you could really call it that).

"Ah, Perry the platypus. Just the platypus I wanted to see," Doofenshmirtz said slyly.

Perry stood up straight for a moment, wondering why in the world Doofenshmirtz would want to see his arch nemesis.

All of a sudden, a shot was fired from Doofenshmirtz's direction, catching Perry slightly off guard. Thankfully, Doofenshmirtz's bad aim made the shot go just past his head, missing Perry completely. This allowed Perry to regain focus and avoid the next shot, which came not two seconds after the first one.

"Hold still!"

A few more shots were fired, and Perry avoided them all. Unfortunately, Perry ran into a trap, and four metal arms came out and grabbed him, holding him down and unable to move.

"You like it? I call it the Platypus Eliminator!" Doofenshmirtz shouted to the sky, obviously proud of his new invention. "I can't believe I didn't think of it before. You see, the only reason I'm not the ruler of the Tri-State area is because of a platypus. So I figured, why not eliminate that platypus, and then go on to take over the world!"

Perry's eyes suddenly grew wide. He knew the Doctor's inventions always worked, it's just that, either due to poor planning by Doofenshmirtz or the fact Perry was always there to stop him, the inventions were never used properly. But since he was tied down, he wasn't able to stop him this time. He knew he would be eliminated if he didn't find a way out of it soon. He began to struggle and pull and the mechanical arms that held him down, but it was no use. He looked around for a button of some sort that would activate the arms, but he couldn't find one.

"You won't get out of it this time, Perry," Doofenshmirtz said with a grin. "I made sure there was no error. Those hands won't let you go, and there's no button for me to accidentally press. It's over for you this time."

Those last words made Perry shudder. He lowered his head and thought of all the things he would never be able to see again and that he didn't get to say goodbye to. But oddly, Doofenshmirtz said, "Let him go."

Perry looked up at Doofenshmirtz for a second before he was dropped to the ground. Thinking he really wasn't going to go through with it, Perry looked back up. Sadly, he was wrong. Perry heard the shot fired, and suddenly, all he could see was white.

Perry was thrown back a few feet and landed on the ground with a loud 'thud'. An immense pain shot through his body where his was hit, and he curled up into a ball, trying anything to get the pain to stop. Weirdly, a few moments later, it did. He wondered for a second if he was dead. Perry opened his eyes to see he was still in Doofenshmirtz's lair, lying on the floor. He sighed. Thankfully, this was the one invention that didn't work.

Perry lifted himself up off the ground into a sitting position. Getting up that far still hurt, so he didn't try to go any further. He looked up at Doofenshmirtz, and saw his face was turning an odd shade of pink. Perry simply smirked at him, as if to say, "Yes, your invention didn't work. HA!"

Perry stood up the rest of the way, and Doofenshmirtz's face turned even more pink. In fact, that wasn't the only thing Perry thought was weird. He actually felt taller than he was before. Plus, there was a breeze hitting him everywhere except his head. He reached up to his head, and still felt hair there. He kept his hand going down, and when he hit his face, he felt skin. Perry quickly pulled his hand away, and looked down on it. He had a human hand.

Perry jumped a little, and fell back down, landing hard on his butt. He looked over the rest of his body and realized everything else was human too. He glanced back up at Doofenshmirtz angrily, as if to ask him, "What the heck did you do to me?"

Doofenshmirtz jumped a little, like he was being pulled back into reality, and said, "I-I don't know what happened to you." His voice was shaky, like he was embarrassed. "The device was supposed to eliminate you, not change you into a human!"

Technically, the machine had eliminated the platypus. Human had just taken its place.

All of a sudden, it dawned on Perry that as long as he was in this state, he wouldn't be able to go back home to Phineas, Ferb, and the rest of the family. He angrily stood up, marched right over to Doofenshmirtz - who was getting redder and redder as Perry got closer, and grabbed his shirt collar. He pulled him down and looked at him angrily, silently saying, "Fix it!"

"I-" Doofenshmirtz swallowed, "I don't know how l-long it will take to reverse the effects of the device. It could take days or it could take years."

Perry threw him back up and walked away, silently saying, "You'd better get started."

Doofenshmirtz asked Perry, "What are you going to do while I'm fixing it?"

Perry shrugged, and defiantly sat back down on the floor Indian style with his arms crossed. Again, Doofenshmirtz turned a violent shade of pink. Perry looked back up, with an expression that said, "You got me into this mess, it's your responsibility."

Doofenshmirtz sighed, "Well, if you're going to stay here, you're going to need to put some clothes on. I can't have you walking around here naked all the time."

Ah, so that's why Doofenshmirtz was turning pink. It wasn't custom for human to walk around naked like it was for platypuses. But why was Doofenshmirtz turning pink when he looked at him? Perry shrugged it off and smiled a little. This would be totally awesome payback one day...

Perry stood up, and walked over to Doofenshmirtz. He grabbed him by the hand and pulled him into his own bedroom. Perry sat on the bed and pointed at the dresser, signaling a dumbfounded Doofenshmirtz to start looking for clothes. He immediately sat down and looked in the bottom drawer, as if to hide his burning red face. After a few moments of searching, he pulled out a white T-shirt, khaki shorts, and a pair of underwear. He stood up and gave them to Perry.

"Here, put these on," the Doctor told him. "They'll probably be a little big, but you'll just have to deal with it for now."

Perry took the clothes and sat up. He pulled the shirt on over his head, then the underwear and the shorts. It felt weird to have something that didn't feel like fur covering his body, but like Doofenshmirtz said, it would have to do for now. Upon putting the clothes on, Perry plopped himself down on the bed, crossing his legs. He looked up at Doofenshmirtz, saying, "What now?"

Doofenshmirtz seemed to ponder this for a moment. Finally, after a few minutes, he sighed and sat down on the bed next to Perry. "I don't know what I'm going to do with you," he admitted. "You're going to have to stay here until I can fix the Eliminator. But I don't know where you'll sleep or stuff like that. I guess there's Vanessa's room, but..."

Perry suddenly hopped off the bed and onto the floor. He laid down in a tight circle on the ground and closed his eyes. He decided that was where he was going to sleep tonight.

"What! You're going to sleep in here? I-I don't know if that's such a good idea." Perry noticed Doofenshmirtz was turning red again. He smiled. If only he had a camera or something so he could blackmail him later. Surprisingly, the Doctor began to speak again. "Well, do you want a pillow or something. I can't imagine it being to comfortable down there."

Perry opened his eyes and looked up at Doofenshmirtz. He nodded slightly, and Doofenshmirtz was immediately on his feet and out of the room. A few moments later, he returned, his arms full of a blanket and a pillow. He set them down next to Perry and stepped away, letting his arch nemesis handle the arrangement.

Once he was settled and his head crashed back down onto the pillow, it quickly felt like he couldn't get up again. He glanced at the clock on Doofenshmirtz's bedside table briefly, and it only said 5:30. It was this early, yet Perry couldn't seem to keep his eyes open for very long. The closed slowly, and Perry was taken into a blissful sleep.

Thus, Heinz Doofenshmirtz was left alone with his thoughts, staring at the new human that had abruptly fallen into his life. Doofenshmirtz would never admit this aloud, but Perry the platypus did look awfully cute as a human. He had a young face, probably around 20 years old, and a fairly in-shape body, as Doofenshmirtz had seen more than enough of today. Perry's teal hair fell messily into his face, and his signature hat sat atop his head like it usually did. If Perry wasn't a guy, Doofenshmirtz would almost call his entire appearance cute.

Doofenshmirtz mentally slapped himself. He shouldn't have been thinking like that. It wasn't his place to. Doofenshmirtz quickly sat up and walked back outside, determined to get started on anything to reverse the effects of the Eliminator and turn Perry back into a platypus. He didn't know how much more blushing he could take.