Title: Gratitude

Author's Notes: This was actually supposed to be a prologue of a chapter fic, but somehow, it took on a life of its own and became this. And who am I to question the plot bunnies?

Disclaimer: All credit goes to the awesomeness that is Square Enix and Jupiter.

Warnings: Some spoilers for the end of the game.

It's been about three months, two weeks, and four days since the last Game ended.

You know, about.

It was almost sad, really, how absolutely normal things seemed after all the excitement (and fear) of the Game. Same streets, same crowds, same routine.

And Neku couldn't be happier.

Every day was a small blessing. He had never truly appreciated all the conveniences that he had. A bed to sleep in at night, a house to go back to, home-cooked meals…all the little things that one never really noticed until they're gone.

Not having to run around being chased by monsters was always a plus.

He would never admit it, but the Game changed him. Mostly for the better too. Josh will never let him live (ha-ha) it down.

For the entire summer, he had gone out to meet up with friends. He opened up just a little bit more. His world was slowly expanding, a little more each day. Despite being put through hell for three weeks, Neku owed some thanks to the Game after all.

And by association, to its Composer.

He couldn't forgive him yet. Not after he shot him twice and never even attempted remorse. Not after he used him and his friends as playing pieces for a game. Not even one game, but four he had been put through, all because of him. That last game especially, the stakes had been at the highest. For Neku, it was all or nothing.

And he had lost.

Yet, for some reason, they were all alive again. Shibuya had not been destroyed. Everything was back to normal and no one was the wiser.

So Neku didn't mind being shot (as much). The part he couldn't forgive was manipulating him and using him as a pawn, that damn smirk and that infuriating giggle, the way that nothing, absolutely nothing, from his eyes to the words from those smiling lips, is real.

He had trusted Joshua. Still did, despite his better judgment. During that second week, he had come to see him as a friend, of sorts. They shared many of the same views, the same values. Sure, he was annoying as hell but Neku felt closest to him out of all his friends.

It had hurt to see him pull that trigger with a smile on his face. And no, he didn't mean the bullet.

But Neku was trying to put that behind him. Forgive and forget, right?

It might've been easier (or harder, because well, it was Joshua) to forgive him if Neku had actually seen him since he'd returned to life. The first time he had gotten together with everyone in the RG, he had stayed there for hours, hoping he would show up.

Of course, he never did.

No one seemed to get who he was looking for. They didn't remember that he was the Composer. Shiki and Rhyme didn't know him at all. Beat remembered him as 'that prissy kid' who was Neku's second partner.

But he never stopped looking. And maybe it really was selfish of him. After all, Shiki will always have Eri and Beat will always have Rhyme.

So every week when he met up with his friends, perhaps he will linger just a little bit longer after they all left. And perhaps he might stroll past Hachiko more often than he strictly needed to. Visited Mr. H's café regularly and even went to Udagawa several times.

He never did show up, but Neku continued to wait patiently because, one day, when a boy with silvery-blond hair and a smug smirk showed up, he wanted to say, "You're always so slow," and drag him off for some ramen or something.

Days bled into weeks and weeks bled into months, but he never minded since Josh really was slow sometimes, so it couldn't be helped.

And so Neku continued to wait and wait for the chance to tell his friend the one thing that he had never gotten the chance to say.

Thank you.