Faux Pas

Author's Note: Just as a quick reminder, this story contains MAJOR spoilers. ESPECIALLY IN THIS CHAPTER. If you haven't finished the game yet and don't want spoilers, I HIGHLY SUGGEST WAITING TO READ THIS.

Also, before anyone gets really upset with me, this is the last chapter, but there is to be second part to this story soon called Rendezvous and I plan on a small series of side stories to fill in gaps.

Thank you so much for reading Faux Pas.

Twenty-Six Tears

The morning he left was anything but easy. Even getting ourselves out of bed was a chore. We held onto each other for at least an extra thirty minutes before Mitsuru knocked on the door to remind us of the time. There was a definite reluctance in our actions as we rose, separating unwillingly.

We had both been discharged from the hospital the day before. Without the others from the dorm around, we were allowed a long time alone together. Despite previous activities we had engaged in, it was in that time with him that I realized we'd never been closer. There was a lot of it spent in silence, but there was very little to be said.

Occasionally, I tried to ask Bebe what he would do once he got back home, but he never had an answer other than a slight shrug. And when he asked what I would do, my answer was the same. Of course I would have to fight Nyx, but without Bebe I didn't feel capable of anything. We had been together for awhile. It would take forever and a day for me to adjust to sleeping alone again. Going back to having no one understand me. Having no one to hold and tell them that I loved them more than life itself.

Everyone was waiting for us in the lounge when we got downstairs. They all had words for Bebe, all kind and with no trace of resent. Though he was leaving at a crucial time, I don't think anyone particularly blamed him. Maybe they understood his reasoning… Yukari and Fuuka both gave him hugs, trying desperately not to cry. Yukari told him to come back as soon as he could. Mitsuru told him that she would miss him not as a support member of S.E.E.S., but as a dear friend, and she even seemed a little teary-eyed. Aigis swore to him that she would keep me safe, and she wished him luck. Bebe hugged both her and Mitsuru, neither of which seemed to know what to do with the gesture, but happy to receive it.

Junpei tried to play it cool by trying to shake Bebe's hand, but Bebe hugged him instead, which seemed to be the gesture Junpei wanted in the first place. Akihiko ruffled Bebe's hair a little, giving him an awkward hug. Ken gave him an awkward lean-on hug, as if inexperienced with forms of affection. Koromaru approached Bebe with a tiny charm, and Bebe accepted it as he pet Koromaru's head. After the final farewells, Bebe turned back to me. I felt a lump form in my throat as I understood. It was time for him to go.

The frosty January air bit my nose as we stood in front of the airport. The area reeked of fuel and rubber, and I was unable to hear much aside from shouts of strangers and hissing vehicles. It had been almost a year since I had been there, and I didn't miss it at all. Especially not then.

Bebe stood beside me quietly. Both of us understood what this was. Ever since airport security had been tightened nine years before, no one without a ticket was allowed to go to the gate. We were faced with our nightmare. Even this was worse than the end of the world. Nyx could have taken me then and I wouldn't have cared. At least I would have been by Bebe's side.

Slowly, he turned to face me.

"Tetsuya…" he murmured. I looked at him hesitantly. Tears swelled in his eyes, though they weren't falling. My heart began to throb with the most excruciating pain I had ever felt. It hurt enough to raise tears in my own eyes, though I refused to let them fall. I couldn't do this. I needed to be strong for him. If I cried, I would only make things worse.

Bebe took another moment to watch me before placing his bags on the ground. He unzipped one of them, rummaging for something. When he finally located it, he stood slowly, holding a tiny box that barely filled his hand. He opened it and took something out, and then took my hands into his.

"I, um… I saved up for zis for a long time. Ze first time I saw eet… you were wiz me. Even before we were really togezer, I wanted to give eet to you. I… wanted to give eet to you for Christmas, but I was short. I was finally able to afford eet after Ryoji-sama left… and I zink… now's a better time to give eet to you zan any," he said softly.

He held up my left hand, spreading my fingers, and slid a small ring on one. At first, it looked like a class ring, but then I got to looking at it closer. I gazed at the tiny jewel, and I instantly recognized it as the ring he had always been looking at since the first time we had gone out together. The little blueish-grey crystal sparkled beautifully.

"Bebe…" I breathed. He tightened his hold on my hands, trembling.

"It reminded me of your eyes," he said, choking a little.

I had thought for a long time about a parting gift, but I wasn't sure if Bebe was going to handle it well. He seemed to struggle with his own, though he was brave. I had considered one thing, and I was glad that I had brought it with me.

I unbuttoned my coat, slipping it off my shoulders and wrapping it around his. He blushed.

"T-Tetsuya, I can't take zis…" he stammered nervously. I rubbed his arms to warm him.

"It's more important to you," I told him, my voice cracking, "…and you're more important to me… …than anything."

Bebe gazed at me, tears trembling in his eyes.

"So… I guess zis eez eet…?" he croaked. I looked to the side a little, trying to avoid his eyes.

"I think so…" I choked. Bebe looked down for a minute, and then back at me.

"Promise me… promise me zat you'll take care of yourself… If zis doesn't turn out… favorably… please don't spend your final moments missing me… I want you to be 'appy," he said.

I was at the breaking point.

"You can't ask that of me… I won't promise that I won't miss you…" I said, "But… I'll try to be strong. I'll defeat Nyx and come out of this alive. I know I will. Because… I still have to meet with you again… when you come back… or even if I have to come to France and bring you back myself… I promise I'll stop at nothing to see you again…"

"Tetsuya…" Bebe whimpered.

As his tears fell, he threw his arms around me, crying softly against my neck. I held onto him as tightly as I could, my tears balancing on my lashes.

"Arigatou… for everyzing," he whispered, then in French, "I'll never forget you, my dearest love… I promise that I will remember you for the rest of my life…"

"Bebe…" I murmured, my voice almost completely gone, "You're the most important person in my life… And… I don't want to lose you…"

Bebe took my face in his hands gently and looked me in the eyes.

"Tetsuya…" he said softly, "Don't you dare 'ide from me. If you need to cry-"

"I'm not going to cry," I said. As I said it, tears began flooding down my cheeks. I couldn't believe myself. I would never forgive these tears. I buried my face in Bebe's neck, unable to stop them. He kissed my cheek and stroked my hair affectionately as I broke into soft sobs.

"Don't be scared, Tetsuya… You never 'ave to be afraid to be yourself… Zat's ze person I've always admired…" he said, sniffling.

He had always told me that I changed his life. He had always told me that it was me who kept him going, kept him breathing, kept his heart beating. He always said that I was an angel. I was a blessing. I knew best.

But then I realized that it wasn't just praise. Even though the thought had been in my mind all along, it never really occurred to me before. Bebe was my angel. My blessing. The one who knew best. The one who kept me going, kept me breathing, kept my heart beating. The one who changed my life.

I had once been a horribly selfish person. I thought I knew better than anyone; I thought I was better than anyone. But I stood, sobbing like a child no less, in the embrace of someone who knew me better than I did. Someone who loved me, cherished me, and adored my every word. Someone that I loved, cherished, and adored more than anything and anyone. I would follow him to the ends of the Earth, and I would put my life on the line to protect his.

Though I had often regarded our meeting as a horrible mistake for putting him in danger, I realized that it really had been a blessing. We had changed each other for the better. My heart throbbed harder and the tears began to fall faster. He was going away. This could be the last time we would see each other. The very thought was breaking my heart.

I took Bebe's face into my hands and pulled him into the sweetest and most passionate kiss I could offer. He clung tightly to me as he kissed back. As we separated, I pressed my forehead to his.

"Thank you, Bebe… for everything…" I whispered, "I will always love you, my angel…"

Bebe's eyes sparkled at the pet name. Tears began to spill harder from his eyes.

"I love you… my angel…" he whispered back.

We kissed again, trying to make it last as long as possible. As we held each other closely, I heard a voice inside my head…

Thou art I… And I am thou… The bond thou hast nurtured hath finally matured. The innermost power of the Temperance Arcana hath been set free. We bestow upon thee the ability to create-

Shut up. This can't be over… I don't want this to be over… Not now… We've hardly known each other… There's still so much I don't know. There's still so much that he doesn't know.

At last, the time called for us to part. Reluctantly, we let each other go, trying to dry each other's tears. I helped Bebe gather his bags, my heart bursting. Bebe placed his hand on my cheek.

"Sayonara, Tetsuya…" he said quietly. He spoke my name so beautifully…

"Good-bye, Bebe…" I whispered. We shared our last kiss before Bebe finally turned and walked away from me. We continued to watch each other until Bebe was out of eyesight. That was the last time I saw him…

The walk home was heart-wrenchingly lonely. I held my newly ringed hand to my heart, weeping softly. As I walked into the dorm, Junpei and Yukari were in the lobby. They looked up at me, and both of their faces fell. Yukari stood up and approached me cautiously.

"Tetsuya-kun…" she said quietly, "Are you going to be okay…?"

I couldn't take it any longer. I wrapped my arms around her, crying against her shoulder. Her arms slowly found their way around me, and Junpei got up from his seat to join in. I placed one of my arms around him, and I thought for a moment that I heard the both of them sniffle. We held onto each other for a long time quietly. For the first time, I didn't want them to let go.

Epilogue

"'Ello, Tetsuya. Zis eez Bebe. Ze kanji eez difficult for me so I'm sorry zis eez all in ze 'iragana. I learned a lot in Japan but Bebe eez still not zat good. I write zis wiz a dictionary. Bebe showed Uncle ze kimono. 'e 'ad much praise for eet. 'e say zat Japan eez a great country. Bebe eez so 'appy to 'ear zis. So I tell Uncle zat I want to go back to ze Japan. I tell 'im many times. 'e say 'Okay!'

But Bebe decided not to go back. I'm sorry, Tetsuya. I said I'd come back, but zis eez a lie. Bebe didn't know. My aunt wasn't ze only one who 'elped me study abroad. Uncle, relatives, neighbors… many people 'elped. Zey all wanted me to go back. Zey said, 'We will 'elp pay for eet.' But my uncle eez sad zat my aunt died. Bebe cannot enjoy Japan while Uncle eez in grief. Bebe cannot take everyone's money for 'is own fun. Learning about Japan can be done in France too. Zat's why Bebe will stay in France. When Bebe eez strong enough on 'is own, zen I will come to Japan again.

Bebe zought about 'ow fun eet eez to make clothes wiz Tetsuya, and entered ze school of fashion. I made a clothes for ze school contest. Bebe won first prize! I named zese clothes that won first place. Tetsuya… a very wonderful name. Eet eez ze name Bebe likes. Japan and France, Tetsuya and Bebe. Zey are far apart…

Forgive me, Tetsuya. Bebe was trying to keep zis letter light-hearted, but I just can't do eet. I miss you. I zink about you every minute I am awake, and I dream of you when I am asleep. Bebe want to be wiz you again. I know you're probably mad at me for breaking my promise. I will stop at nozing to come back. But I still want to come back on my own. Bebe will work 'ard to see Tetsuya again. I want to get back togezer soon.

Every moment I spent wiz you was amazing. Bebe would give anyzing to do eet all again. I assume zat you defeated Nyx. I knew you could. I believed in you from ze very beginning. You're a strong and gentle person, Tetsuya. Bebe love zat and so much more about you. Maybe when we meet again, we can 'ave a normal life togezer. I would love to see your smile, feel your kiss, and 'ear your voice again.

I guess what Bebe eez trying to say eez… I still keep my promise. Eet may not be as soon as I'd 'oped, but I will see you again. I' ope you aren't upset wiz me, but I understand if you are. But know zis, mon chéri – I will always love you. I promise we'll meet again, my angel.

~Love, Bebe"

I've read his letter a thousand times now. Roughly six pages of sloppy Hiragana. When Mr. Ono first delivered it to me, I couldn't contain my excitement at all. I took the letter to the roof and opened it at once. My heart broke and fluttered as I read through the pages. I read the last three pages—the ones he stopped holding back with—over and over until I had ingrained them in my mind forever. The last line was blurred a little by water spots, and it drew my own tears every time I read it.

I could never be upset with Bebe. I understand why he isn't coming back. If I was in his position, I would feel the same way. Still… I can't help but wish he was here with me now. Now more than ever…

The warm winds of spring caress my cheeks. I never thought I would see the spring again. It's all over now… The Dark Hour… the Shadows… The Fall… It's peaceful now. Life can resume its normal routine. Well… for everyone else, at least.

I remember when I stood before Nyx, the powerful and terrifying being… I thought I heard Bebe's voice. In the end, I think it really was him that saved me. Maybe… he knew it was better for both of us if he left. He was the reason I succeeded… Yet, I feel as though a part of me is missing now… I still have my heart and mind, but I still feel as though I'm nothing more than a walking carcass.

I wait for the rest of S.E.E.S. to meet Aigis and me on the roof of Gekkoukan, but I'm not sure how much longer I have left… But I want to hang on so that we can fulfill our promise. If they can remember anything, I want to see them one more time. I want to see them one more time as my best friends who remember what we've done for the past year… The mirror reflects drooping eyelids and dark circles beneath my eyes. All I can do when I come home from school alone is collapse on the bed until morning. It's a wonder that I'm still breathing. Everyone is worried about me. Bebe would hate to see me in such a condition. Maybe it's better this way…

I read Bebe's letter once more as I rest my head in Aigis' lap. Even though it touches my heart, it makes me sad. I know it won't happen. We will never see each other again or have a normal life together. After all, "nothing about my life will ever be normal again…" What will happen to him when I'm gone? Will he move on? Will he find someone who can care for him better than I ever could? It pains my heart to think about it… And my worst regret is that I find myself without the energy to write him back… had I been able to, I would have continued my story so that I could explain in full how the final battle took place. I would ask someone else to write for me, but… I really don't think I can pour out my honest heart with a third party.

"Tetsuya, just rest," Aigis says quietly, "You've read that letter quite a few times. You need to stop worrying and rest."

No one understands. Big surprise. But then again, it's not so bad. I don't really care anymore if they understand me or not. Ever since Bebe left, all of my friends have been very close to my side. Even Kenji, Kaz, Nozomi, and all the others who didn't approve of us initially. They're here for me now. They've really been here all along… And they care. They're worried about me. They don't know what's going on with me. I'm not entirely sure myself, but I know I won't be able to think it over much longer.

Aigis speaks calmly to me. I'm glad she's finally found her purpose in life. She's a sweet girl – human or not. She tells me that though it's all over, she wants to go on protecting me. I smile a little as she reminds me of Bebe.

He would say the same thing… He was my everything… I loved him…

Ever since he left, I wrote of our story in a journal. Yes. That journal. Should anyone ever find it, I hope they find a way to give it to him. I think he should know exactly how I felt about him. Sometimes thoughts are more powerful in written words. I want Bebe to know how much I loved him. That is my last wish…

Aigis smiles at me, tears spilling from her eyes.

"I guess… life doesn't have to have some big, general meaning. Life means something different to everyone… All you need is something simple, like someone to take care of…" she says.

Someone… to take care of… Someone… like Bebe…

I can hear faint voices. They remembered… for the first time in a long while, I can feel myself smiling. I'm sad, but I have to remember that my time was never wasted here. I have these friends. I had the chance to meet someone so amazing and incredible as Bebe. Even though I never felt like I could do enough for him, I made him happy. And he made me happier than I could have ever dreamed of feeling. Maybe there aren't any regrets...

I can see the others now… but I can't keep my eyes open anymore… I'll rest them. Only for a moment…