Espada Vacation

Written by G. Ai Inoue

Summary: Aizen has decided to take his dear Espada on a vacation! He plans on taking them on a cruise to the Bahamas! Lovely, isn't it? Oh, but almost nothing can be lovely when we deal with the Espada. The Bahamas will NEVER be the same again.

AN: I DON'T OWN ANY OF THIS! Except the story line and my OCs… This is based on my own vacation by the way.

~Chapter One: Getting Ready ~

Ulquiorra's POV

I opened the door of my room to find the Tercera, Tia Harribel, standing out in the hallway. Her arms were crossed as usual, but she seemed rather perturbed. No one ever really comes to my room so I presume that Aizen-sama has ordered a meeting. Again. I may be loyal to the man, but he orders an almost insane number of meetings in a week. I do believe the record is about…one-hundred forty-seven. Each meeting is an hour to five hours long. We were all on the brink of insanity that week.

Tia and I walked down the hall along with the Primera and Segunda. Starrk looked tired as usual and Barragan was mumbling something about revenge. Most likely about getting revenge on Nnoitra for the food fight he started last week.

"Why didn't Aizen-sama just call us to a meeting himself like usual?" I asked the blonde Tercera. She glanced over for a second.

"Aizen-sama didn't call us. Gin did. He skipped into Starrk's room while I was there and said "Aizen-taicho wants ta see ya all. Gather the others up!" explained Tia. Wow, I never knew she could impersonate Gin's voice so well.

I nodded before turning to look forward. There was one thing I'm questioning about Aizen-sama right now. Why did he choose Gin out of all people to be his second in command? Even Kaname would be a better second in command. Hell, I would settle for Grimmjow. He doesn't watch every Arrancar's every movement on camera.

"SHIT!" I heard Tia yell out the curse as she fell to the ground with a thump. I looked forward (since she was walking ahead of us all) to see a metal bar in the air, right about where the Tercera's head would be. Harribel herself was getting up while holding her head, some blood staining her sleeve.

"HAHAHAHA! I GOT YOU GOOD BITCH!" came the eerily annoying voice of Nnoitra Jiruga.

"What the hell are you doing, Jiruga?" asked the Primera, holding back an amused smile. The Quinta himself stepped out of the shadows. It turns out that the bar was his Santa Teresa.

"My arm was getting TIRED! Nice timing, Harribel!" he laughed his psychotic laugh. "And Starrk, I was teaching you all a lesson."

"How?" we all asked. The spoon-like Quinta laughed.

"That ya shouldn't walk around with yer eyes closed!" He laughed again, but was cut off with a mighty kick in between his legs, courtesy of Tia Harribel.

"Try that again and you'll lose what makes you a man." Starrk didn't even try to hold back his laugh. This earned him a glare from the green eyed female.

"Relax, Halibel, geez, no one can take a joke around here! Ulquiorra just DIED when he saw what I did in his room! Remember, Ulqui-" I cleared my throat rather loudly.

"We should head to the meeting room. Aizen-sama is waiting." The others agreed with me as we headed toward the other Espada Quarters.

~SCENE CHANGE~

Tia whacked the Quinta in the stomach to wake him up.

"I swear I didn't do it! Grimmjow did!" yelled the spoon. He looked around in embarrassment as it dawned him that he was in a meeting.

"Ya, I can't believe it either Nnoit," said Gin from his place behind Aizen-sama.

He sighed, "I shall repeat once more because I am just that kind, Nnoitra." He nodded in understanding. "I decided that you've all been quite well behaved to I am taking you all on a cruise with me to the Bahamas."

We let the information sink in once again.

"Nice try, Aizen…-sama but you're not gonna fuckin' trick me that easily," said the Sexta as he stood up.

"I'm quite serious, Grimmjow. You will all pack and we will be leaving tonight. And please watch your language, Sexta," said Aizen-sama as he turned back to the rest of us. "Dismissed, my dear Espada."

~SCENE CHANGE! WOO! ~

"We're going to the Bahamas! I don't fuckin' believe it! This is fuckin' AWESOME!" yelled Grimmjow. He had two over stuffed suit cases that his fraccion were trying to drag behind him. Aizen-sama had said that we were splitting into two groups. Primera-Cuarto plus the Octava, and the rest were in the other group. Gin and Kaname were assigned to be with the others.

"I can't wait till we get there! Did you SEE the picture of that ship? IT HAS A WATER SLIDE! I am SOOO racing you down the steep one!" shouted Lilynette as she dragged Starrk down the hall. We were all heading towards the Throne Room.

Barragan had a huge suit case that his fraccion were struggling to push while Tia just pulled hers down the hall easily. I had one also, but my fraccion was carrying it for me.

When we got to the Throne Room, I saw Szayel Aporro there in a blue Hawaiian shirt and red swim trunks. Nnoitra was there also, but he was wearing those things called a speedo.

"What the hell are you two wearing?" asked Grimmjow with a laugh.

"It's a vacation, Grimmjow! I'm surprised ya came in your uniform!" said Nnoitra.

"Hey, at least I'm not the freak that is already wearing their human clothes when we didn't even leave yet!" argued Grimmjow.

"Actually, I'm wearing my trunks under my hakama. And Lilynette is wearing her swimsuit," said Starrk with a yawn. Now that he mentioned it, Lilynette was just wearing her jacket over her swimsuit.

"Our gigai's will all be wearing what we are once we get into them. I'm wearing my swimsuit under my uniform," said Tia. "And Barragan is hearing a Hawaiian shirt as you can see."

Grimmjow looked around in astonishment. Even Aaroniero, Zommari, and Yammy were all dressed for the summer we were about to go through.

"Che, looks like it's just me and Ulquiorra," he said as he dragged his suit cases over.

"Trash, I'm wearing one also," I said as I unzipped my jacket to reveal the green Hawaiian shirt.

"Shit, I'm the only one!" Aizen-sama stepped into the room at that moment.

"Please watch your language, Grimmjow. Now come, my children, we are staying at a hotel for one day before heading to the ship."

We all nodded before stepping through the Garganta that opened.

This will be the most interesting 'summer' we will ever have…

~END CHAPTER~

So…not that funny yet, but it will once they get to the hotel. Please review! Ideas and suggestions will be great too^^

Till next chapter!

~Ai-chan