Hello Everyone! I know its been forever since I updated but as promised, I got out a next chapter! Please dont think that this story will be abandoned. If anything, it will just be dormant for a long time. I'm sorry that I dont update more often but, you know how it is when you dont get the time =[ For all of you that stuck with me from the first chapter, a thousand kisses for you! And for all the new readers, welcome and I hope you stick around too! Anyway, here is chapter five of A Penny For Your Thoughts, entitled:

~~ The Morning After~~

You know that panicky, headachy feeling you get when you wake up - still slightly drunk - with a burning hangover and you have no clue where you are but can vividly remember snippets of the night before? That draining feeling of trying to wake up and get the hell out of whoever's bed you're in as fast as possible but you cant cause your body feels like lead? Yeah, that was me right about now, but ten times worse because…well…I was naked. Naked in the biblical sense of birthday suit bare, save for a very lacey, scant pair of pale pink underwear. Now it wasn't the nudity that bothered me but the fact that I had no fucking clue where or why my clothes had been taken off. Which led to a barrage of questions my tequilla addled mind wasn't ready to process such as: "When did I get naked? Did I willingly get naked? Do I remember doin anythin while naked? Why cant I feel mah legs? Where are mah car keys? Oh…right, I don't have a car…" and so on. It didn't help that the room seemed to be vibrating and that I could feel my heartbeat in my fingertips. I could feel my heart rate climbing as I tried to make sense of the flashing of tequilla bottles, denim encase erections and wet kisses that flashed through my mind. Quickly, to quell the throbbing in my head, I took a couple deep breaths and closed my eyes as I tried to adjust to the sudden influx of sensations. With the impending panic attack fended off, I took another deep breath. Then, with a wrenching motion that took gale force strength, I jerked myself upright, dragging the satiny sheets beneath my fingers along with me. Hastily, I took inventory of my body. There were no hickeys, bruises, bite marks, scratches, scrapes, suspicious residues of bodily fluids or any other tell tale signs of sex that I could readily identify. My lips didn't feel sore or swollen, nor did any more of my more…delicate areas. So as far as I knew, I was good.

Except for that smell…

Sniffing, I picked up a sent that smelled like soap, potpourri and musk, which wasn't bad aside from the fact that it wasn't coming from the sheets…it was coming from me. And that was when I realized I felt eerily…clean. Like fresh from the shower, squeaky clean. A hand flew up to my hair, tangling in a damp mess.

"Okay, I know fer damn sure I don't remember takin a fuckin shower!"

Before I realized my legs were moving, I was scrambling out of bed, desperate to find my way to the nearest exit. I needed pants, shirts, socks, shoes, anything I could get my hands on and shuffle into before I had to face whoever it was I went home with. I never stayed until morning. Ever. Unless, of course, we were fucking until the break of dawn and even then I usually managed to skip out before anyone could even think of offering me breakfast in bed. Too damn personal. Too damn intimate. I stumbled over objects I didn't bother to identify as I tried to locate my clothes and cursed as I stubbed my toe. I need to get out of here fast. What if I couldn't detect any tell tale sex signs because we'd gone at it in the shower? It would be awkward trying to make it through breakfast when I didn't even remember the guy's name. I needed to get dressed, get some coffee in me and head home before…

I jerked to a stop, hands braced against a table as wave of sadness gripped me. A light bulb snapped on in my head as the earlier parts of yesterday came whizzing back to me. "Oh. That's right…I don't have a 'home' anymore. Well, shit…" My knees threatened to give out as I began to remember the cause for my tequilla induced blackout. The couch in the staircase, my clothes tossed in a careless pile, the bleak emptiness of my apartment that had been uprooted, tossed about and gutted like a fish. I was fucking homeless. I was a nobody, a bum, a loser. Where was I rushing off too anyway? When I made it into the streets at God knows what hour it was, where the hell was I going to go anyway? Nowhere. I was aimless, pointless, deserted. No matter how fast I beat it out of here, I could never out run that fact. Depression slammed into me as I contemplated my predicament and I instantly wished I had more tequilla to dull the burn I felt in the pit of my stomach. But that hadn't done me much good, had it? In fact, even after all those shots, I still felt worse than ever.

"So yer awake."

I'm ashamed to admit that the shriek that ripped from my throat as I jumped in surprise resembled a combination of a frightened girl and a stuck pig. Nearly knocking my self over in surprise I whipped around at the sound of the deep voice, hands instantly clutching the sheets precariously tangled around my body tighter.

"N-Nnoitra…?" I squeaked breathlessly. My brain scrambled to process this new factor in the equation.

He smirked, peering at me curiously. "No shit. Who else would it be?"

"I-I…" I trailed off, head pounding as I put the pieces together and realized that I was apparently at Nnoitra's place. Squeezing my eyes shut, I tried to fill in the rest of the blanks about last night. There was booze, there was Nell and Shuhhei, then there was more booze, then a guy….an alley way and then- "Fuck, my head hurts," I muttered shakily, hand rising to massage my temples wearily.

"Hmm," he grunted, the sound making a warm feeling flutter in my belly. "It should. I think yah pounded enough shots ta put a elephant down."

"Yah meet me in the alley," I sighed, not bothering to open my eyes. Another grunt of agreement, but this time it was lined with amusement. He was laughing at me. "And then yah took me back to yer place, right?"

"Mmhmm," he seemed to purr, voice closer than before as he out right chuckled in enjoyment.

I frowned, eyes snapping open in annoyance. "Stop laughin yah prick! Where the fuck are mah-"

The words dried up on my tongue and my brain short circuited as I finally took in his appearance. He was topless, wearing only a yellow towel that draped dangerously low on his narrow hips. I nearly balked at the sight. His taunt, chiseled six pack was startlingly arousing enough on its own but the water that glistened like diamonds against his alabaster skin was the icing on the cake. His stomach rippled fluidly, my eyes riveting on the fine trail of dark dusky colored hairs that trailed from his belly button and down his pelvis before being cut off tauntingly by the towel. I knew I was staring, openly ogling him but I couldn't seem to look away. Everything about him was so long and beautiful, all arms and legs and bunching muscles. He was just too much. With the little bit of will power I had left, I tried to snap back to attention but then my eyes snagged on the black ink pasted against his upper left hip bone that I had never seen before. It was a gothic number 5 tattoo.

"Yo. Eyes up here Sunshine. I have a face too yah know," he rumbled and it shot straight to my groin.

Trying to play it off, I frowned. "Piss off, I wasn't lookin at yah."

"Bullshit." He was all teeth now, smile glinting off piano key teeth in the bright morning sun. I wanted to lick them from molar to molar. "Yer probably already hard from just starin at me."

"Bite me."

He walked deeper into the room, grinning as I stumbled, backing away from him until I was pressed up against a wall. He didn't stop though. I let out a small gasp as he closed the distance between us, bracing his hands above me on the wall as he loomed over me.

"That can be arranged."

"Nnoi, back off. Yer-"

My words cut short as he leaned in, breath fanning my face softly. "Yer really rude in the mornings, yah know that?" I was at a loss for words as his other hand ghosted up my side and I was suddenly very aware that we were both practically naked. My heart sped out of control.

"Nnoi…where are mah clothes?"

Both hands rested on my hips now, kneading them gently. "There around here, somewhere."

"I need 'em."

"Fer what?" he muttered, lips hovering above mine.

I clenched my fist tightly, gripping the sheets closer to me as I turned my face quickly. Although from the very begging all I'd wanted from Nnoitra was to fuck him, this didn't feel right. This wasn't how I wanted it to happen. I didn't want it to be one drunk night were I was so smashed I couldn't remember what we did. I wasn't in control of anything and it was freaking me out. "Obviously, ta not be naked, baka."

"Yah didn't seem ta mind it so much last night."

My head snapped back towards him, heart lurching into my throat. "Wait a minute, did we-"

I was cut off again at the chuckle I felt against my cheek. Then there was stifled laughter. Before I knew it Nnoitra was doubled over at the waist, laughing like a maniac. I was more than confused. That quickly morphed into enraged as his laughter continued to increase in volume.

"What the fuck are yah laughin at, yah baboon's ass! I was askin yah a serious question and…Hey! HEY!"

He cackled again, pulling himself to his full height before ruffling my hair with a grin. "Calm the fuck down Sunshine, we didn't fuck last night. I was just pullin yer leg. But you should have seen yer fuckin face. Looked like yah swallowed a lemon." Turning away from me dismissively, Nnoitra walked over to a nearby dresser, rifling around for what I hoped were clothes.

For a minute I stood there trying to process what had just happened. My hangover urged me to be calm but the cranky, depressed, pissed off Shiinji had other ideas. Gritting my teeth, I tried to count to five and calm down. It didn't work.

"Yah stupid fuck, that wasn't funny! Do yah have any idea how freaked out I was just now, I thought I was goin ta have a damn heart attack, yah idiot!"

He snorted, throwing a smirk at me over his shoulder. "Aw, come off it. That was fuckin hilarious and yah know it. Shit, wish I had a camera. That expression was priceless."

I was about to storm over to him and pummel his face when a sudden flick of his wrist was all the warning I got before I saw the yellow towel flutter to the floor carelessly. I squeaked and whipped around, hands flying to my eyes. "Hey, gimme a lil warnin before yah start strippin, will yah?"

"Why?"

"Because….'cause…." Wait a minute, why wasn't I lookin again? I turned back quickly, hoping to catch a peek of something, but he was already pulling up dark blue jeans over his black boxers, grinning like an ass. At least he was still topless.

"Yer so predictable Shinji. I bet yah'd blow me right now if yah could get on yer knees without fallin over."

"Shut up!" I snarled, stomping my foot, but then my headache decided to make its presence known again. Unable to stay upright anymore, I sighed, sliding down to the floor with a thump. "Yer such a dick. Just wait till I get rid of this headache, I'm gonna kick yer ass."

Pungent smoke wafted towards me as he pulled something hand rolled out of a tin box on his dresser and lit it. "Don't be pissed at me cause yah got a hangover. Maybe this'll teach yah not to go around gettin drunk off yer ass." Smoke blew out of his nose, blurring his face. I wondered if he knew how sexy he looked at the moment, if he was doing it on purpose.

Not likely, I thought to myself. What would be the point o' turnin me on now when I could barely stand straight? I let a moment of silence pass as the room got thick with smoke and I tried not to barf at the smell with my eyes closed. I could still feel him smirking at me from across the room. "So…we definitely didn't sleep together… right?"

"Yah really don't remember?"

I shook my head no with a sigh. "Nuh uh. I cant remember past gettin in the front door. After that, its all a blur. I know yah said something, then I said something, then yah started takin off mah shoes… but fer the life o' me I cant remember the rest of the night."

I glanced over at him to find him looking at me with a deep quiet thoughtfulness, like he was trying to find the right words.

"What?"

He got up, jeans sagging on his hip as he walked, gesturing for me to slide over before he slumped on the floor next to me. His bare arm grazed mine on the way down and I had to resist the urge to run my hand down his side. Opaque smoke rings floated up to the ceiling and we sat in silence for another minute. Subconsciously, I pulled the sheets closer again.

"Yer a fuckin mess Sunshine."

"…What the hell is that supposed mean?"

"It means," he uttered calmly, turning to me as he licked his lip absent mindedly, making me shiver slightly, "That there was no fuckin last night. I brought yah home, took off yer shoes and put yah to bed. Yah were too wasted to even walk straight."

My head sagged against the wall. "Thank god I didn't do anythin stupid. Its embarrassin enough that yah found me like that in the alley."

"Nothin to be embarrassed about. Yah got drunk and went lookin fer an empty fuck." I cringed at the way he said it. It made me seem like…such a slut.

"So wait a minute. If we didn't sleep together, why the hell am I naked?"

He chuckled, dragging in another lungful of smoke. Squinting slightly, he let out a stream that wafted over me like a veil. I was beginning to feel slightly light headed but I refused to say anything and have him stop. It felt like I was getting a peek into the private world that was Nnoitra Jiruga and I'd be damned if it was cut short because I was getting a little buzzed.

" 'Cause yah puked all over yerself and my bathroom about 30 minutes after we got home."

"Oh fuck, please tell me yer messin with me again…"

"Wish I was. I couldn't let yah sleep it off in yer own puke so I stripped yah down and hosed yah off in the shower."

Burying my face in my hands, I groaned, finally too ashamed to even be seen anymore. "I am so sorry. First I cry all over yah like a blubberin idiot then I barf all over yer apartment."

"Don't worry about it, its not that big a deal. Besides," He trailed off thoughtfully, "I was kinda wonderin what color panties yah were wearin anyway. Gave me an excuse to take a peek."

Although I couldn't recall the last time I had blushed so much in one month, I seemed to be doing it a lot more since I met Nnoitra. "Glad I could help yah out."

"Yah look good in pink, by the way."

"Please shut up."

So smoothly I didn't even realize he'd moved, the hand he had resting on my head bunched in my hair, pulling my face out of my palms and brought my lips to his. He had moved before I could even protest and by the time I had enough wits to do just that, I wasn't sure I wanted to anymore. His lips tasted rich, full of smoke and heat and a savory tang that was distinctly Nnoitra in essence. I couldn't tell if it was the weed or my hangover but everything seemed to pulsate, tremble for a second before absolutely stilling and the only thing I could feel moving were our bodies. As he ran a hand through the back of my hair, it held tight, pressing our lips so close I had to open them or have them shredded against his own. Nnoitra didn't have to do much more to get me to gasp, his tongue delving into my mouth slowly as though it has a definite purpose and one wrong move could spoil it all. And truthfully, it could. I didn't know if I wanted to wriggle away from him in fear or throw my carefully crafted control to the wind and just let go. I settled for keeping one hand clenched in the sheets around me and letting the other stray to rest on his shoulder. The way his muscles bunched under my fingers urged me to grip them tighter, to make sure this was real, that he was real. He nipped at my bottom lip, dragging me nearly into his lap with his left arm while the other stayed out of reach, blunt burning like incense next to us. It wasn't until he reach over and dropped it into an ashtray behind him to grab me with both hands that I realized how far I'd let things go.

"A-a-ah…Nnoi…wait a minu-"

The words were lost as his lips claimed mine again, roughly this time. I pressed against his chest, trying to create some space between us but he ignored my attempts, sucking on my tongue viciously. I moaned around the appendage, twisting my face away but he only tipped my head back, attaching my neck with skill. A long tongue swept along my jaw line, making me mewl as it curled around my earlobe. I thought I was going to explode, but then I felt his had tugging at the sheets. I froze. Nnoitra stopped as well, feeling me suddenly go stiff. I couldn't see his face but I knew he was waiting for my next move. Time seemed to tick by slowly and when I did nothing, he tugged again, this time with a determined hand. The sheet wrenched down, bunching around my waist and he moved back to my lips. It was the chill of the room against my bare chest that snapped me into action.

My hands shot out to grab his wrist, one pressing against his chest forcefully this time. "Wait, stop! W-we cant do this!"

His eye pulsed a hot violet color, making my stomach quiver at its intensity. "Why not?"

"Because… we just cant. I cant…"

"Why?" He asked again, a hand sliding to press mine firmly against his hot chest, heart pumping steadily beneath the solid flesh. My palm seemed to become a part of him. I couldn't pull my hand away even if I wanted to.

"Nnoi…" I closed my eyes, biting my lip nervously. "I changed mah mind. We definitely need ta be friends, nothin else. I cant do this with yah. I know exactly where this is goin and imma tell yah right now, no good can come of it. This, this thing that yer offerin me wont work."

"Because yah don't want it to work."

"No because I know it wont. I'm not the guy yer lookin fer. Yer tryin to turn me into somethin I'm not. I get drunk, I fuck random guys. I stay out late. I don't keep mah promises. I'm restless and I cant stay in one place fer too long. I cheat. I've got more issues than I have enough time to tell yah about. I'm trouble."

Nnoitra looked un-phased, completely undeterred by my confession and frankly, a little bored. "I guarantee I've gotten into - let alone created- more trouble in one day than yuh've ever seen in yer life. I think yer forgettin that I'm not such a nice guy Shinji. If I can shoot a guy at point blank range and not even flinch, I think I can handle yah."

Unsure of how to deal with that new bit of information I didn't say anything at all. I just stared, wishing I could give him this desirable Shinji he was looking for and restraining my fingers from fixing the sloping bandana that still covered his left eye. Once again, he took my silence as confirmation and dipped his head, catching my lips in a chaste embrace. I groaned lightly, completely ready to push him away until he pressed his chest against mine, creating such a delicious friction I thought I would cry. Of their own accord my fingers wound into his hair, grinding us against one another with bruising force. He returned the favor, hefting me up slightly by the armpits to his height. I swiveled my tongue against the roof of his mouth, relishing in the vibration of my tongue ring against his strong teeth. There were sparks, flames, fire, lightning, intoxication…danger. Before I knew it, he had hoisted me up, my legs instantly locking around his waist for purchase as he stood, stalking over to the bed, the sheets left behind and forgotten. It was when I felt his large hot hands grasping my bare ass cheeks daringly that I froze again. We tumbled onto the bed and I could feel that he was trying to keep me from choking up again, squeezing my ass again gently but it was too late. On the bed, beneath him, clinging onto him for dear life it became painfully clear that I was not now nor would I ever be in control of this thing between us. He firmly held the reins. I wretched my face away again, pushing at him with all my strength but he barely budged.

"No! No, no no no…we cant!"

"Shinji-"

"I cant do this, I just cant. Yer messin everything up, cant yah see that? We have ta-"

Nnoitra growled, yanking my chin to face him. "Shinji. What the hell are yah so scared of?"

His anger took me off guard and I let the first words that came to mind jump out of my mouth in a gush of breath. "You. Everythin that yah are, everythin that yah represent…I have no control over any of it and it scares the shit out o' me."

For a minute, we just looked at each other in silence. I regretted the words once they had left my mouth but it was too late to take it back. A dark, calculating look came over Nnoitra's face and I wondered if he would kiss me again. There was such a bittersweet feeling rumbling inside of me that wanted him to ignore everything I'd just said and show me all the things he had to offer but at the same time would fight tooth and nail just to be on the opposite side of the room right now. I wanted everything. I wanted nothing. I wanted things from him I shouldn't even dare to hope for and at the same time I didn't want him at all. I wanted to be led but I was so scared I needed to lead. But most of all, I wanted some room to just breathe. I couldn't think with him this close, his smooth skin radiating so much heat down on me that I wanted to melt. I wanted to melt into him. Lost in my own musings, I jerked when he closed his big warm hands around my waist tightly, burying his face in my neck as he breathed deeply. I waited for his next move. Then, he laughed. Hard.

"Like I said," Nnoitra sighed, pulling back to stare at me with a look I couldn't read. "Yer a fuckin mess."

Without another word he was off of me, shuffling back over to the dresser to pull out a dark yellow v-neck hoodie and wife beater that he slipped on with ease. I stared blankly after him, trying to pull myself together but ending up feeling more scattered than before. Carefully, I eased off of the bed, stopping to scoop up the sheets and tug them around myself once again. But this time, they didn't feel like a safe, warm cocoon. They felt nearly brittle against my skin, stuffy and were more of a restraint that a protective cloak. Nnoitra strutted past me, retrieving his blunt and lighting it again before stopping to look down at me in appraisal. I couldn't meet his eyes.

"Come on, lets get yah dressed. We got places to go," he rumbled, walking away with a purposeful gait.

The sheets rustled behind me as I stumbled along, absentmindedly taking in the fact that everything in the apartment seemed to be …white. Immaculately white, pristine in color and incredibly bright. How he kept this stuff clean was beyond me.

"W-where are we goin?"

"To get yer shit. Yah do need at least another pair of clothes if yer gonna be stayin here."

A frown etched its way onto my face as I recalled our deal from last night. He turned into a small back room that had a washer and a dryer with my clothes neatly folded on top. Nnoitra handed me the bundle, bracing against the dryer as he continued to smoke, watching me as I considered leaving the room. I wasn't too sure I wanted to change in front of him.

I sighed, realizing he wouldn't be offering any privacy willingly. "Can yah at least turn around?"

He seemed to consider it for a second. "No." I guess he hadn't considered it much after all.

"I'm…I'm not too comfortable with bein naked in front of guys I'm not sleepin with. It's weird. And uncomfortable."

"First of all," he exhaled, smoke streaming out of his nostrils, making him seem like an angry bull, "Yah don't have anything I havent seen already. And yer puttin on yer clothes not takin them off. Second, yer gonna sleep with me eventually. Yah might as well get used to it now."

"You arrogant dick, who says I'm gonnna-"

"Lay off it Shinji. Yer pissin me off and ruinin my high."

Anger boiled inside of me at the way he ordered me around. It made something that I didn't want to feel stir inside of me as well as bring back many unpleasant memories. Where did he get off bossing me around like I was his bitch or something? I'd spent too long being my own boss, I wasn't going to bend now. Besides, there was a glimmer in his eye that seemed to be challenging me. It was like he was daring me to contradict him and I never backed down from a challenge. At the rate he was going, he'd be lucky to even dream about kissing me again. Not that I wanted him to or anything. With a growl I snatched on my clothes quickly, pretending I didn't see the way Nnoitra was leer at me as I wriggled into my skintight pants, and pulled on the shirt before turning on my heels and stalking out the room. I ignored the way he trailed behind me closely, smoke billowing around the both of us like a cloud. I was more concerned with finding the living room. I wanted to get my shoes on and get some fresh air before I either had a nervous break down or broke his face. As I stomped up the hall, my pace slowed when I realized what a long walk it was. Glancing around, I realized there we're two doors on either side of the wall, each seeming to lead into another room spacious room. Another open space that I assumed to be the living room loomed ahead of us, filtering bright white light down the hall. It was when I turned into the room that I realized…his apartment was fucking amazing. Plush white couch over a foreign looking black rug, metal coffee table with a glass top that sat across from a large flat screen T.V. and a stereo that looked more expensive than everything I owned combined. As I floundered for the right way to express my awe, Nnoitra sauntered past me, pushing his heavy leather jacket into my hands and nodding to my shoes by the door. I slipped into them, shooting another glance behind me before grudgingly shrugging into the jacket and following him out the door. It slammed shut behind us as we left, ushering us into the dead quiet hallway. Nothing out here looked nearly as fancy as the stuff inside his apartment, however. It looked relatively normal, like any other shitty apartment building in the ghetto. Boring wood floors, doors with chipping paint, musty hallway with a relatively aged banister and the slight scent of piss. Walking out of his place was like walking out of a very white cloud back into reality. Which could only mean he'd spent a lot of money making his place look that good. He'd managed to create a penthouse suite paradise out of a rotten hole in the wall. I didn't know hoe I felt about that.

"So…when were yah gonna mention yah were loaded?"

He glanced down at me, dragging on the last of his cigarette before stubbing it out on the wall and flicking it away. "Didn't know it mattered."

"Well it doesn't really," I huffed, running a hand through my hair, regretting I hadn't thought to comb it before we left. "Its just another interestin fact ta add ta the 'illogical shit that Nnoitra has or does but doesn't explain' list. I'll need ta have all mah evidence straight before I start askin questions." I looked up at him, to see him staring ahead with an expressionless mask. "And I will ask questions. Eventually."

He ran a hand over his face, eye drooping in the wake of his morning high. "Be careful with those questions Sunshine. Fer each one yah got I've got one o' mah own fer yah too. Don't ask until yer ready to answer yer own too."

Biting my lip, I said nothing else, a fearful feeling gnawing at my stomach. There were definitely questions I didn't want to come up in conversation but knowing Nnoitra, they most likely would. He held no punches when it came to assessing me. There was a bluntness behind his words I had grown rather fond of. It was way easier to deal with someone when you straight up front what they wanted. But I still didn't want to talk about me. I was a topic that was best left untouched, both literally and figuratively. As if hearing my thoughts, I felt Nnoitra's hand rise to rest on my lower back protectively. I had to control the shiver that wanted to rip through me. Blinking up at him, I tried once again to talk some sense into him.

"Yer just glutton fer punishment arent yah?" The words had sounded so much nicer in my head but out loud it sounded like a fight. But he only grunted, pulling me closer as we trudged out into the new day. I wanted to squirm away, but I just couldn't do it. Instead, I sighed, wondering how bad the rest of this day could really be. After all, it was the mornings after that were always the worst.

Please give me any feedback or comments you have on the chapter and as always, REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW =] Ciao!