Disclaimer: Yea... I still don't own.
I want to apologize for the delay in submitting this chapter. I don't know why, but for some reason I had forgotten that I had it all written up and ready... I really could have put it up a while ago xD Sorry! But here it is... Tell me how you like it, k? I really want to know everyone's feedback on the whole story. I also have some side stories (behind the scenes stuff) that I would like to post if people are interested. (And I already have one- Choaji's funeral- all typed up so it'll be posted by next weekend)
Enjoy the last actual chapter!
And review ;)
Earl- I would like to welcome you to the finale of the hit new series "Earl's Diet Game Show"! *heart* Now to bring out our lovely contestants.
Earl- Allen Walker!
Allen- *mumbles to self* stupid dresses… stupid bean sprouts… stupid Kanda…
Earl- Kanda Yu!
Kanda- Hey, moyashi, everyone can hear you mumbling you know! *rests hand on mugen's hilt while he locks eyes with Allen* I think I heard something about me being "stupid"?
Allen- *evilly smiles* Well, I'm impressed. I didn't know that you could understand human speech BaKanda.
Earl- *as Kanda and Allen send sparks of murderous intent between them* Yes… Well the next contestant would be Allistor Krory… but we couldn't get permission to take him out of crazyville- I mean the mental ward- yet. Apparently he just keeps muttering something about Soba being "the devil" *shrugs, not really interested* So, skipping him, that brings us to Skin Bolric.
Skin- Hey, where's my good, sweet tasting, candy? *looks around* This doesn't look like the candy store…
Earl- Very good Skin! This ISN'T a candy store.
Skin- It's not? But Rhode said…
Earl- ehhh *sweat drops* never mind…
Earl- After Skin we would have had Choaji Han… but since he's a fatass, he ended up eating Miss Lenalee Lee. *chuckles creepily* and let's just say we haven't been able to find the body and we don't really care to look *heart*
Earl- With all that said… that leads us to our last contestant *twirls as he pauses for dramatic effect* and winner… *another pause, leading it past dramatic into the epic zone* CROSS~~CHAN! *heart*
Cross- Who gave this creep permission to even use the word "chan"? I would like to find them and shoot them full of fucken holes. I'm getting nauseas here.
Earl- Don't pretend you don't like it *heart*
Cross- Those "hearts" are just as bad *fingers twitch in annoyance* Can I have my gun back now?
Earl- Patience *heart* Now to call out the overseers!
Earl- Tyki Mik
Tyki- *strides on to stage and ruffles Allen's hair* To bad it's ending. We had so much fun, huh Boy?
*Allen just mumbles darkly to self*
Earl- Lavi
Lavi- Yu~chan! Our inseparable relationship can't be broken by the end of the show! We'll always be together, forever! *heart*
*Lavi ducks just in time to avoid getting decapitated*
Lavi- So mean, Yu~chan! Why must you always try to detach my beautiful head?
*Lavi just dodges a swing to his torso*
Kanda- *glaring threateningly, a slightly sadistic glint to his eyes* I'm not picky about which parts I detach.
Lavi- *bunny ears appear* Yu… chan? *backs up slowly in fear*
Earl- Yes… *turning away from Kanda chasing Lavi around the stage with the intent to kill the poor redhead* Now on the Rhode.
Rhode- *hugs Allen* We made so much money for sweets *nuzzles her head against him* I mean we had so much fun, right Allen?
*Allen twitches*
Earl- Ummm Rhode dear *heart* Why are you hanging on Allen when you're Skin's overseer? *smiles creepily*
*Rhode huffs moodily as she slowly lets go of Allen and stands by Skin*
Earl- Perfect *heart* Now time for the winner's overseers… the twins Jasdero and Debitto!
…. *silence*
Earl- Jasdero and Debitto?
*everyone stares at Cross*
Cross- What? *takes a drag of his cigarette which "magically" appeared* I know I'm irresistibly good looking, but why the hell are you all looking at me?
Earl- *coughes* Cross~chan? *heart*
Cross- Yes? *a sardonic smile tugs at his expression while he can't help but twitch in annoyance*
Earl- Where are the twins? *heart*
Cross- No idea. *heart*
*distant screams are heard in the distance that sound eerily like the twins*
Earl- Well then, *ignoring the screams* I guess we'll continue without them.
Cross- Yea, forget about those filthy beings. Where's my gun?… or more importantly my money.
Earl- *sighes dramatically* You never change. Always such the demanding one *heart*
Cross- No, I just know what I want… and I always get what I want. *Allen shudders from past memories* Speaking of which… the money and my gun are?
Earl- Right here! *pulls out an envelope and Cross's gun from nowhere*
*Cross snatches both the envelope and gun, smiling sinisterly*
Earl- Now, let's look over the winner's footage from during the show! *heart*
*a large black screen appears out of nowhere*
Earl- *magically has popcorn* let's enjoy!
3…
2…
1…
*Footage of Allen in the dresses plays on screen. Everyone is dead silent. The Earl's popcorn falls to the ground. Everyone slowly turns to look at Allen, who has a horrified expression frozen on his face*
Kanda- Che, nice DRESSES beansprout.
*Allen's eyes glint dangerously at everyone, daring a single soul to continue*
Cross- What the fuck stupid apprentice? Did I raise you to turn out like that?
*Allen twitches*
Rhode- *gushes* But he looks so cute! *a evil smile appears* And the pictures made so much money *heart*
Cross- *scratches his chin while he smiles evilly as an idea of how to make some money crosses his mind* Really now… hmmm…
*Allen's veins pop out*
Tyki- *trying to console Allen* Don't worry, you make such a cute girl
*Allen finally snaps, letting out a war cry as he activates his innocence. He charges the screen, destroying it until there is nothing but dust*
Earl- *who still hasn't moved a muscle since he dropped his popcorn, finally stirs* So…
*everyone pauses (even Allen who was still stomping on the already pulverized screen) to stare at the Earl*
Rhode-… Earl?
Earl-… So… So… So…
Tyki- Earl. Snap out of it!
Earl- So… CUTE!
*everyone's mouth drops open, stunned stupid*
Lavi- "regaining his wits, questions hesitantly* Ummm… General Cross?
Cross- Huh?
Lavi- Wasn't that suppose to be your footage? Of what you were doing?
Cross- *smiles in a way that makes everyone shiver* And your point is?
Lavi- *hesitates, knowing that he is entering a dangerous topic* Well… did… you… ummm… switch the footage cables that went to your camera to Allen's?
Cross- *smile gets wider* Now why would I do that? *heart*
Lavi- *sweat drops* Hehe… yea…
Earl- *trying to regain his composure as his eyes are wide and creepy* Ummm… yes… footage… must have been… switched… *coughs*
*Komui walks out on stage sipping his coffee*
Komui- Yes, now I think that's all folks. And since our host is, um, out of commission *looks pointedly at the Earl who is still spacing out* I'll cover the closing for my dear friend Earl~chan! *heart*
*everyone shivers, disgusted at the fact that Komui called the Earl not only his dear friend but also chan*
Komui- Since I have a lot of… work to get done… I'll be blunt. *fixes glasses with an evil smile*
THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR TRUDGING ALONG THROUGH THIS TO THE END. I HOPE EVERYONE ENJOYED THEMSELVES AS MUCH AS THE CHARACTERS *chuckles darkly*
IF YOU'D LIKE SECRET "BEHIND THE SCENES" STORIES WILL BE COMING. HAVE A GREAT DAY!
… And Komurin… MAKE THIS A WONDERFUL FINALE!
*everyone stops abruptly from leaving, their eyes becoming scared*
Everyone in Unison- … Komurin?
Komui- *chuckles menacingly as his glasses glint* GO MY CREATION… WITH EARL~CHAN!
*a mechanical noise is heard as a giant robot appears*
Komurin- Yes, master. *the komurin lifts its arms* Fireworks!
Unison- *everyone pales* Fire… works?
And nobody had time to run before the place was up in smoke.
Fin.