Summary: Respawn was turned off and BLU Soldier died in the battle. Engineer reacts negatively to the loss. Contains some mature content, including mentions of blood, sexual situations and death. Pairing is BLU Engineer and BLU Soldier.
Warnings: Contains some gore, homosexual practices and character death. Also the characters may seem a bit "out of character".
Disclaimer: I do not own nor have the rights to Team Fortress 2 or any of its content. I am just a gamer who likes to write fanfiction.
This is the second part to "Last Promise". This was written because both my friend and I felt like it had too many loose ends to leave it as a solo entry. So here is the aftermath of the battle.
Please also note; this is suppose to be a bit over dramatic and full of angst, not realistic.
o.o.o.o.o.o
I Will Follow You Into the Dark
He was not use to being unsure of himself. He was a man that solved practical problems, as he always told people. He rarely waxed philosophical; and if he did, it would be after quite a few shots of whiskey. He thought debating things, like 'true beauty' and 'the purpose of life', were impractical and had focused his machines and work. Now, he wished he had not.
He sat as his desk, flipping what looked like a harmless little chip in his hands, back and forth trying to ignore the shotgun that laid in front of him. He set the fragile chip next to the weapon, studying it for a moment. He wished he had confronted those impractical things, because maybe it would have at least allowed him to know whether his plan was right or wrong. Whether suicide was justifiable or completely immoral. He let out a soft sigh and rubbed his forehead in response to the growing headache. He was raised Christian, and he remembered the teachings they pounded into him since he was a babe. Most people in his situation would be able to turn to that for guidance, but he couldn't. He was told, by the church, that killing was one of the greatest sins a man could commit and currently he had a career in building machines that were purely designed to kill men efficiently. He scoffed and leaned back into his chair, he was also told that for a man to bed with another man was an abomination to God; and his current situation was solely caused by the death of his very male lover. No, the religion of his childhood would not help him now and he was left feeling a bit more empty because of it.
He picked the small chip back up, studying it closely under the lamp that also sat on his desk. It was amazing, to him, that this tiny bit of metal was the only thing that had stood between him and death during his career for Builders League United. It held all of the data the respawn would need to regenerate him if he died. Without it, the respawn wouldn't be able to bring him back and any harm that would befall him while it was gone would be be lasting. He gave himself a small sad smile as he pulled out another chip from his breast pocket. It was another BLU respawn chip. He had taken it the day Medic had announced that their team's Soldier was dead and would never be returning. There had been a few hours of hope, when they found the empty bloody uniform in the sewers, that maybe respawn had picked up the body and once it was brought back online, it would regenerate their fallen comrade. But as the minutes ticked by, after the respawn got restored, that hope turned into the dread that still sat in his stomach.
When they declared the Soldier officially dead, they had given him the uniform, unwashed at his request and he was glad they allowed him to keep it. He set the two chips down, side by side on the table and pulled out the white undershirt, from one of his desk drawers. It had once belonged to the man he loved and he gently rubbed the soft cloth for a moment and then brought it up to his nose to smell. It was the only item out of the BLU's personal effects that didn't get contaminated by disgusting sewage water, due to it being cradled in the protective outer jacket the man wore. Because of that it held onto the Soldier's scent, even a week after it had been left behind, and the BLU engineer clung to it for the comfort that it brought. He nuzzled the cloth, closing his eyes and basking in the smell of gunpowder and smoke that blended with a scent that belonged to nothing else but the other man. He faintly recalled Medic once rambling about how people used smells to remember things, but he couldn't remember if he believed it before. He certainly did though now, and the evidence sat in his hands. He carefully draped the shirt around his neck to let the smell wrap around him as he picked up the chips once more.
He doubt he could forget 'Solly', as he had once so fondly called him. The man may have had his problems but he had made Engineer happy in so many ways. He smiled as he remembered how the other would try so hard to please him, bringing him mechanical parts and scraps he thought would be useful for construction, and cooking his favorite meals when he feared that he had upset him. How the man carefully embraced him when they laid in bed and how he somehow always knew when and where to kiss him. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes, mentally painting the picture of how Solly looked when they had sex. The way the man's brow furrowed in concentration and the way his broad chest would turn slick with sweat as they got close to climax. How his large hands would tremble as they gripped Engineer's hips because he was trying so hard to remain in control and not get lost in the moment. He gave a small shiver in pleasure as he recalled how the man's scars somehow stood out in the dim light of their darkened room and when they finally did orgasm Soldier would throw his head back to let out a hoarse cry of pleasure.
He opened his eyes again and looked blearily up at the ceiling. He brought up a hand to rub away the tears that now trailed down his cheeks. The man that had brought him so much joy and pleasure into his normally secluded life was now gone, because some godamned, twisted, cowardly bastards killed him for their own, SICK AMUSEMENT!
He let out a angry roar has he slammed his fists furiously against the top of the desk, smashing the two chips into tiny pieces in the process.
"Why! Why did they do that to him! He was loyal to 'em and they threw him away like some piece of junk!"
He collapsed against the back of his chair with a weak sob. He only noticed the blood dripping from his hands, where the metal bits had pierced the skin, after it began to drip on his overalls. BLU had stolen, what he considered to be, his only chance at real happiness and yet they expected him to continue working for them as though nothing had changed. He felt his sobs subside as he observed the splintered pieces scattered across the desk, his eyes finally stopping to focus on the shotgun that still rested on the desk. He was not going to let them use him like a tool. He may not be able to harm them, knowing they had too many defenses for a single man to get through, but he knew he could escape them.
His hands barely shook as he picked up the gun, slowly checking the ammo to make sure it was properly loaded and ready to fire. He used one hand to hold the weapon and the other to lift the edge of Solly's undershirt shirt once again to his nose. He didn't care if the blood on his hands stained the cloth now, he just focused on his lover's scent one last time before he pulled the trigger.
"Solly, I hope you are waiting for me on the other side, because I am following you into the dark..."
He dropped the soft cloth and quickly put the muzzle of the gun in his mouth before the crack of the gunshot echoed throughout the base.
o.o.o.o.o.o
The first one that got to the room was Scout, being the fastest member of the team and the closest to Engineer's quarters. By the time the rest of the men showed up, they found the boy in hysterics and the room splattered with blood. The body was never found, but like the Soldier, the man's uniform was there. It laid on Engineer's chair, with what looked like Soldier's undershirt draped around the shoulders. At first it puzzled them, but when both the Spy and the Medic noticed the remains of what looked liked a destroyed computer chip on the desk, next to a shotgun with one used cartridge, they looked at each other and understood. They told the others what they believed to have happened and together worked on cleaning up the mess
Since neither man left a body they couldn't provide them with a proper burial. However the team managed by folding up both uniforms and burying them the next day near the fort along with the pair's weapons and tools. The remaining seven team members stood around the the freshly covered grave. They remained silent and one by one they turned and walked away, going back to the war that seemed more pointless now, then ever before.
o.o.o.o.o.o
Fin