A/N: Seriously…this is weird stuff! I had nothing better to do, so I wrote this. This is extremely wacky and also kinda point – and meaning – less.

I was walking down the hallway, when I heard Aro call my name. I went to the throne room immediately, nobody wants to see Aro when he is angry. Not even me.

Even though I am Jane Volturi, Aro will still execute me if he has to. I pushed the door open and I was totally surprised.

Aro was curled up on the floor, and was constantly twitching…

… IN LAUGHTER!

Felix was above him, holding millions of HUGE feathers. It took my mind a few minutes to put it all together.

Felix was tickling Aro.

I never knew vampires could get tickled. "Give me that!" I snapped at Felix.

He smiled and tickled me. I laughed like you would never believe!

I tried to torture him, butt it didn't work…

"Feli-haahahaha hahahahaha hahahahhaha hahaahahahaa hhahaahah ahahahahaha!"

I tried everything to stop him. I just forgot one very obvious thing. "Felix! STOP!"

And he stopped. As simple as that. And I was stupid enough to miss that. Dumb me.

I went back out, not standing Master Aro's laughter.

I bumped into Felix. "I thought you were with Master Laughter."

"I went out!" he said cheerfully.

"Hi." I said

"HI"

"Hi"

"HI"

"Hi"

"HI"

"Hi"

"Hi"

"HI!"

"HI!"

"H!"

"H!"

"H!"

"H" –

I was interrupted by my twin. "ALEC! What did you interrupt me for?"

"I just wanted to say something."

"What?"

"HI!"

Felix rolled his eyes.

"What are you rolling your eyes for? I am supposed to roll my eyes at you because you rolled my eyes at me so I have to roll your eyes at me and Jane will roll her eyes at both of us then you will roll your eyes and I will roll my eyes and Jane will roll her eyes and you will roll your eyes and then Jane will put me in charge and technically you are – or will be - under my command" –

"Under my command? What are you Alec? Three?" I asked.

"No, silly! I'm one and a half!"

"Guards!" Aro's booming voice came from the beginning of the hallway.

"Yes Master!" we said, and raced to his side immediately.

"I lost my TEDDY!"

We all burst into laughter…which was a very wrong thing because Aro was shouting at us now.

"DO YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY? I LOST MY TEDDY! THIS IS SERIOUS BUISNESS!"

"Of course sir! We will handle this matter as seriously as possible!" Marcus said.

Then he excused himself. I followed him and heard him say, "My eeevil plan will work! I will take over the world with Aro's teddy and all the other teddy's of the world! And," he paused dramatically, even though no-one was listening (except me) "SUGAR!"

So MARCUS had Aro's teddy!

MYSTERY SOLVED

I went to tell Aro immediately, but he didn't believe me. So I had to solve this Marcus mystery by myself!

I went to Marcus and he said, "Open your mouth." So I did as he said.

He shot a whole lot of sugar in my mouth. And, OMG, it totally tasted like sugar. I jumped around and laughed and acted drunk. THAT'S IT!

I WAS SUGAR DRUNK!

That's what Marcus meant by ruling the world with sugar!

I tried to torture him, but my powers didn't work when I was drunk! NOO! DOOM!

I tickled Marcus with my feather and escaped! What a lucky escape!

I have to find Master Aro and tell him I found his teddy. "Sissy! I lost Beary!" my moronic twin said.

Oh no! Marcus was capturing all the teddies of the castle! My little Fee-fee is next!

Bye!

Jane Volturi

A/N: So? How wacky and pointless is this? Tell me! REVIEW! It will make me happy! PLEASE REVIEW! Or Else! (Just Kidding) ;D