"She´s so beautiful. Can you believe we actually made this?" A tired voice asked, face smiling gently. Another form sitting next to him on the bed stroking the red hair and smiling. "I can´t even believe that I could be here seeing this. To be with you..." He said somewhat sadly. The red haired one pulled him slowly into a brief kiss. Just a little peck, but ever so soft and loving. "You have done nothing wrong." He said. "And even if we didn´t start so good, you´re here now. With me. And never will I let you go."

Yes their start really hadn´t been too great. Lavi had been ordered to go on a solo mission. It wasn´t supposed to be hard. Just to retrieve a document from a fellow scientist. He had done that, but returning home was a blur. He remember bits here and there. Pain, immense pleasure, numbness, cold, vicious golden eyes. Then gentle, sad golden eyes.

Only thing he remember clearly were those eyes. Those beautiful eyes.

Then he had woken at the Black Order surrounder by his friends and few nurses.

"How are you feeling?" Allen asked. They had been worried sick about him. Lavi had showed up at the Order covered with bruises and little cuts and he had a fever. No he was finally woken up.

"Fine I guess..." Lavi said little uneasy. "What happened?" He asked.

Lenalee shrugged her shoulders. "Don´t know, you just showed up at the entrance covered with cuts. Do you remember anything from the mission?" She asked.

Lavi thought for a moment. Did he remember something? No, nothing. A little parts he told them. "Golden eyes.." He whispered. "What?" Allen asked. "What did you say, Lavi?"

"Golden eyes." Lavi said a little louder. "I remember golden eyes and pain...and pleasure..." He said quietly.

"Golden eyes?" Lenalee asked. "Who has golden eyes?" She wondered. Lavi was thinking the same thing.

"Alright you two the patient needs rest. You can visit him again tomorrow." The head nurse told them. Allen and Lenalee nodded and turned to Lavi. "Sleep well." She said smiling. "We´ll come back tomorrow to see how you´re doing." Allen said. "Kanda is worried too you know." He then smirked. Lavi laughed softly. No way would Kanda ever show that he´s worried. Maybe in his mind, but never in public. "Ok, guys. See you tomorrow then." Lavi smiled.

Lavi had lied. He remember more than little parts. Especially one part. He remeber that all too well. Lavi sighed and closed his eyes. It was midnight already.

He remember two strong hands roaming all over his sweating body. His own voice moaning from pleasure and wincing from pain time to time. Him yelling and trying to fight back those hands, those lips. Pain in his backside wich turned to pleasure.

Lavi shivered as he remembered it. He knew all too well what had happened. But a Bookman should never shown their emotions. No matter how painful and scary were they.

Lavi sighed. His innocence had been taken from him. Against his will. He had been raped. By someone he couldn´t even remember. He couldn´t tell the Bookman. He would hit him and yell at him for being so damn weak. Kanda would pretty much ignore him. Lenalee would smother him with her constant worrying and Allen...Well he didn´t know. Allen would probably be the best one to tell. But not now. Lavi hadn´t quite taken the matter in. He couldn´t understand it.

He sighed again. He would think it tomorrow. Right now, sleep.

What he didn´t know, that the owner of those golden eyes were watching him. Smiling wickedly in the night.
"My my, what a strong will this one has. Let see how he handles what´s coming."

AN: Hello there! This is my first ever fic, so be nice! And incase you did miss it, this is yaoi! So don´t like, don´t read! Rest of you fellow-yaoi-lovers enjoy! Oh, and please leave a review to say what did you think of the prologue.

~NekoEd