Solitude . Isolation. Loneliness. The prospect of having eternal life and spending it completely and utterly alone is enough to drive one mad. I lost my entire mortal family and allowed that my sire be put to final death. He had been a cruel and terrible creature, but I still felt the lack of his presence.
Esteban Vasquez, the kindred who had liberated me from my sire, left the night after my sire met the sun. He helped me bury my family and assisted with informing the servants on the property that I had purchased it from Charles Spenser. He then wished me luck and was on his way.

The next few months seemed to drag as I continued my focus on mastering the disciplines inherent to my clan. I found that the resistance to physical trauma, Fortitude, was the most frustrating to learn of all. I could concentrate on the emotions of others or their will for my Presence and Dominate abilities. With the resilience, however, I had to rely on my body to react naturally.

The only way to test if the ability worked was to hurt myself. The act of testing this was not only foolish, but often led me to the point of hunger. One of these times, knowing that I had all too recently fed on the servants at the house, I ventured to the village that was a few miles away from Spenser's estate. There, I settled myself into the pub and began looking for someone who fit my tastes.

Through trial and error after my embrace, I learned that I could only bring myself to feed on attractive blond women, such as my wife had been. Charles had told me that the exclusions that I held in my feeding habits was part of the curse of the Ventrue clan, but I often wondered if it was more connected to the devotion I still felt for my late wife, Lenore.

Finally, I settled on a young woman sitting by herself on the other side of the room. She had been staring at me, hardly ladylike behavior. I reminded myself that this was necessity and approached her. I smiled as I addressed her, doing my best to project my charm. "Miss, what is it that a lovely young lady is doing here at this late hour? Should you not be at home?"

She blushed, the rose color of blood radiating over her porcelain cheeks made her much more attractive to my hungers. She finally shifted her eyes down and away from me, she was playing bashful now. I was getting the notion that she was more the a little interested in me. Good, I thought, I don't have the patience for pussy-footing around tonight.

She seemed to study her drink for a moment before she finally spoke, "I traveled here to visit my uncle, perhaps you could lead me to his home, sir?"

I agreed, intending to leave her in an alley where one of the townsfolk could find her and then assist her. She followed me out and began to explain that her uncle lived outside of the village and that he owned a farm a few miles away. After a short amount of time, I realized that she was alluding to the late Charles Spenser. I decided that I would lead her to the estate, feed, and then alter her recollection of the entire event once done.

As we approached the estate, she stopped and stared at me once more. "Sir, tell me, how long did you think you could continue after destroying your own sire?"

My surprise was difficult to mask as I tried to understand where she would have obtained this information. I focused my gaze so that her eyes were locked with my own. "Tell me, what gave you that idea?"

She laughed. When she had finished her fit of laughter, a triumphant smirk made its way over her face. "You foolish childe, did you mistake me for Kine?"

I took a step back, remembering the lessons that my sire had taught me. To take the life of another Kindred without the proper consent is to forfeit your own right to existence. Though I did not dispatch him directly, I certainly did not take action to save him, either.

By that logic, I suppose that I might as well have done it myself. That still didn't answer-

"I can read your emotions and thoughts, childe. Even if I couldnt, the air of liberation is nigh tangible around you." She slowly moved her hand into her bag that she had been carrying. "Charles had been a dear friend of mine. It pains me to know of his passing. However, I can find some solace in avenging him."

She sprang from where she stood with a stake in hand. She had the advantage of surprise on me, as I was still processing that she could read my thoughts. The sharp pain of the stake pushing its way into my chest returned my mind to reality. Fortunately, she missed my heart, but that did not mean that the injury did not cost me. I pushed her away and removed the stake from between my ribs. Reflexively, my blood sought to heal the damage. Having failed at staking me, she withdrew a blade from her bag. Before I could react, she was on me again, trying to slice through my neck.

Try as I might, I could hold back the Beast within no longer. It broke free of its bonds and retaliated. In spite of her speed and fluidity of motion, she had flinched at just the wrong moment. I caught hold of her by her arms and drew her closer to me. The Beast was continuing with my original plan, feeding. She struggled violently at first. I could feel the rush, the high of taking her blood. For a moment, I relented to the Beast and I relished in the ecstasy of consuming kindred vitae.

All too soon, the feeling had ended. Sated, the Beast withdrew, leaving me with a rapidly decomposing corpse. She fell apart in my hands, finally degrading to dust.

I felt an overwhelming dread form at the pit of my stomach. I realized that she would not likely be the last to come to visit Spenser, and surely someone would come looking for her. I absently gathered her belongings from the roadside and headed home. I made my way into the office that Spenser used and there I began looking through the woman's bag. She had two more stakes, a longblade, and a change of clothes. As I set the clothes on the battered oak desk, a letter fell to the floor.

The letter was penned by Charles Spenser and was dated just a few nights prior to his passing. In the letter, he divulged that he was concerned that his child was growing ill, just as the others before had. He requested that his favored niece come to visit him in his time of mourning.

I stared at the letter for a few more moments before I crumpled the paper in rage. He had put me through all of that hardship and he had planned to kill me afterward. He was even looking to a companion for pity. Furthermore, she knew of his intentions and still held me accountable for what had transpired. A part of me triumphed and felt that she got what she deserved.

At the deepest part of my soul, however, I still felt that it was all wrong.

More weeks passed, and I found myself falling into a habit of walking the perimeter of the estate at least twice per night. On one of these nights, I found one of the servants following me. It occurred to me that he was most likely just trying to verify that I was safe in my late night wanderings, but I found myself enraged nonetheless. When I turned and rushed to him, I ran more quickly than what is normal for a mortal.

He fell backwards in surprise when I was so suddenly in front of him. I lifted him by his shirt collar and held him a few inches above the ground. "What are you doing?"

I could feel him shudder in response. He quickly found his words, though the sound of his voice reflected his fear. "I w-w-was just trying t-t-to make certain you were s-safe, sir."

My inner Beast stirred with rage, it was insulted. It sneered at the idea of a mere mortal thinking that he could protect it. Before I realized, it had taken over.

My fangs had dropped and I threw the man several feet back. I was upon him again almost before he had landed. I could see my hands and feet beating him and kicking him, yet I was powerless to stop. I feared what I had become.

Moments felt as an eternity until my fists stopped swinging. It felt like icy cold hands had grabbed each of my wrists and were pulling me back. Instinctually, the Beast tried to flee. When it was unable to actually run away, it relinquished control. By the time I collected my senses, I saw Esteban standing over the poor frightened man that I had attacked. He was dominating the man to think that he had been attack by bandits on his way home from hunting. As the man walked away in a trance, Esteban turned to me. "Mr. Thomas, I truly expected more of you."

A dozen retorts and excuses made their way through my thoughts and each one I realized was not enough to explain. I had done wrong and there was no reason aside from my own failing. I hung my head and awaited what I was certain would come next.

After a few quiet moments, I could not bear the suspense that I was held captive to. "You've come to finish me, have you not? For my crimes?"

Esteban chuckled and I felt the tendrils release their grip on me. I, not expecting him to release me, fell to the ground.

"And what form of barbarism would you think I practice? You clearly feel remorse for your misdeeds. Perhaps I should have considered how young you yet were."

I looked up to study his face and gain a better comprehension of his intentions. He smiled and extended a hand to help me to my feet. I took his hand and allowed him to pull me up. "Why?"

He took a moment to study me, then to make certain that my poor servant was gone. "I do not believe that you would like to follow in your sires footsteps, would you?"

I shook my head. "I mean why did you come back?"

He hesitated, seeming to search for the same answer himself. He began leading me back to the estate before I finally received an answer. "I returned because I was told long ago that I would be given an opportunity. I nearly missed it before. I do not intend to miss it entirely."

When he noted my befuddled expression, he continued, "It's something that Ill explain more later. Tell me, how have you been, Mr. Thomas?"

As we continued, I recounted the events of the past months since I had last met with the elder Kindred. He did his best not to react, but when I explained how I had consumed my visitor, he was clearly shocked. That certainly is a hefty crime, Les. It is a weight that shall hold over your soul for some time.

I nodded in agreement; I had felt that very weight after the pleasure of having devoured that woman faded. I opened the front door and led him into the study. I was content with reading by the moonlight, but Esteban motioned to light one of the candles in the room. I passed him the matchbox and allowed him to light the candles. I drew back, the candle seemed to illuminate the room far brighter than I had previously experienced.

Esteban took note of my reaction, concentrated, and the room grew darker, which was much more comfortable for me. "Has it been that way since you consumed the other Kindred?"

I concentrated for a moment and then nodded.

"I've been told that sometimes when you perform such an act, that the sin takes literal form. He who commits to Amaranth will have a stain upon his very soul, which may be detected by others..." Esteban hesitated, seeming to omit something, though what it was, I could not discern. "Perhaps this sensitivity is what my sire had spoke of then."

I settled in a darker corner of the room and handed the letter that I had found in my victims belongings. As he took the letter, I remembered the other change that I had noticed. "I also can move faster now, if I choose."

Esteban said nothing, choosing instead to focus on the letter. He seemed to be less shocked than I had been to read its contents. "Yes, I long suspected that Spenser was up to something along these lines. This is precisely why I began monitoring your estate after wed met. You were the third of his childer that I'd met in the past few decades."

I was surprised, and then again, not. The letter, the very specific way he would instruct me, and the way very few Kindred would pay me much mind at the gathering he took me to, it all added up. I suddenly felt very weary.

"Leave with me, Les."

I looked up to Esteban, trying to understand his motives. He simply smiled. Leave the estate behind, take whatever gold you have, and start up a business venture elsewhere.

He was right, I needed to move on. "But where..?"

"America, I hear, should be an interesting place to visit right now. I've heard they've begun a war against themselves. By the time we get there, it should all be over."

I shrugged and glanced out the window. Before long, the sun would rise. "Tomorrow then?"

Esteban nodded and then we headed to the cellar to retire for the day.

The next evening, I rose to find Esteban was already up. I ventured up from the cellar and found that he was outside, in the courtyard. Standing with him was a young couple, a blond woman in her mid-twenties, and a blond man who was likely a few years older than she. Esteban introduced them as Arthur and Kristal Riechter. "These are my associates, they guard my carriage during the day."

I then began the process of gathering the handful of my belongings that I wished to take with me. We would first head to London, then book passage to New York.

A.N. Short, yes, but the next section will probably feel more like a true short story, and this in-between-er would likely feel out of place any way except for stopping here.