The car ride

My heart pounded, and all I could do was to think of him wondering what would happen between us. His deep brown eyes stared at the road and said nothing. I tried not stare at his sexy appearance that I loved so much but I couldn't I could no longer stay in silence. "So….um" he turned, and all the words I wanted to say just left my mouth. I hesitated I, I, I had to think of something fast or I. "Roza?" he said I flinched; it was the nickname he gave me the night we had fallen under victors lust spell. Now I knew what to say well sort of "I just want to know what's going to happen now?" I said it as clearly as I could but he probably felt it as if I was saying it in a scared tone, I'm sure he should have expected that after everything we've been through. "Rose I'm not sure you can forgive me I can't forgive myself for hurting you I still feel like that monster and because I feel that I don't deserve you." I couldn't believe it he thinks what he's done was his own fault well part of it was he couldn't stop no matter how much he tried and many will still have to live that fate he was lucky but still thinks he's a monster. "It wasn't your fault and besides I can't blame you entirely I would blame Nathan because he started all of this but he's dead so can you stop with the whole I don't deserve you crap." "Rose you may be able to let it go so easily but its harder for me, do you know how I felt in there." That was something I didn't think about what had happed to the real Dimitri when that strigoi part of him was with me. "I'm not sure the only thing I was thinking is that your soul was still in there but it was trapped while one of those souls from hell took over." I took a deep breath not knowing how he would take it moments later he spoke in a calm voice. "Rose what happened to me is undesirable

But what I do remember is when I was turned it was lie everything I cared about was instantly snatched especially you I felt you were dead and I couldn't do anything to help every feeling I had with you just vanished in an instant and well…" he stopped "and?" I said I wanted to know more "rose I understand that you're worried but there is nothing you can do." He probably didn't want to elaborate because he still thought how he almost killed me would affect how I think of him "Dimitri?" I said "yes?" he responded "do you still love me" I know it wasn't the right time to ask that but I needed to know the truth and only he knew how to answer me I just hope he still knew.