One Broken Wish

Summary: He regarded her incredulously and told her, "Once I go back, I'm not coming back." She nodded gravely, "I know."

Disclaimer: I don't own Card Captor Sakura, Clamp does.

Author's Note: This can be a continuation of A Thousand Broken Promises but it doesn't have to. It's not so much a sequel as it can be a story on its own. Hopefully though, it will clear up some confusion in A Thousand Broken Promises.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Nine Hundred Ninety Two – Sakura could start to feel the excitement bubble up inside her. She was almost done. She was almost there. She did it, she actually did it.

Sakura suddenly felt a strange peace within her; she couldn't help but be content with herself at the thought that she was almost done. It was a tranquilizing feeling that had slowly crept up on her and filled her entire being. Maybe she could be happy without him after all. However, as self accomplished as Sakura felt, she was disappointed to find the apparent frown present on her best friend's lips. "Are you almost done?" Tomoyo asked, her voice lacking the air of enthusiasm that Tomoyo usually had. Tomoyo never really approved of Sakura's project. It wasn't so much that Tomoyo didn't care; it's that Tomoyo simply didn't understand. Actually, Tomoyo cared so much about Sakura that she was determined to not ever let Sakura get so heartbroken ever again. She was willing to do everything to prevent that, and making an ex a thousand cranes screamed heartbreak. It just wasn't healthy.

Yet here Sakura was, happier than she's been in months. Tomoyo just didn't get it. "Yeah, I am. It's hard to believe…" Sakura replied, smiling. Nine Hundred Ninety Three. "It is," Tomoyo agreed in a soft tone. Tomoyo was not happy at all that Sakura was nearly done. That would mean it was that much sooner that Sakura would talk to him, or even worse… see him. They were just so unpredictable, so inconsistent. Anything could happen, absolutely anything. And that's exactly what Tomoyo was afraid of.

"Neh… Tomoyo-chan, I know that you don't exactly… approve, but…"Sakura trailed off. Nine Hundred Ninety Four. "Oh, Sakura-chan. It's not that, I'll support you in anything you do. I'm your best friend. It's just I don't think what you're doing is the best thing for you right now. You know, when you're done… you can always give it to me to give to Eriol. Then you wouldn't have to—"

"No."

Tomoyo sighed.

"Tomoyo-chan. You're going to have to accept the fact that I'm going to do this. I am doing this. I'm not, I'm not a useless person who needs to be protected or anything. I appreciate your concern, but nothing you can say or do will stop me. I need to do this. It's for my own sake; this way… he'll be gone. No more strings or attachments. I'll be finally free," Sakura explained. 'Well, that's the plan anyway,'Sakura thought to herself. Nine Hundred Ninety Five.

"If you… if that wish was yours, what would you wish for?" Tomoyo questioned.

"It's not my wish to wish upon," Sakura answered. "Yeah, I know. But what if you had another wish. Follow me here Sakura. Hypothetically… what would you wish for?" Tomoyo inquired, searching desperately for answers for her questions. She wanted to understand, really, she did. But she just couldn't put together why Sakura was so determined to do this. She didn't know why Sakura needed to finish the cranes in order to move on. To Tomoyo, it just didn't make sense. And as much as she wanted to understand, to support her best friend – she couldn't. Tomoyo knew that seeing him would only make things worse. Sakura was just starting to get better now and Tomoyo was certain that Syaoran would ruin everything Sakura had built up until this point. As much as Tomoyo wanted to encourage Sakura, she knew that this project would only end destructively perhaps even detrimentally. She wanted to believe in Sakura, but she knew that nothing good could come from it.

"I… don't know. I have … I don't really have anything to wish for." Sakura shrugged. Nine Hundred Ninety Six.

"Nothing at all?" Tomoyo pressed on. She was trying to piece the few pieces of the broken puzzle. Trying to somehow, comprehend where Sakura was trying to get at.

"Nothing at all." Nine Hundred Ninety Seven.

"There must be something, anything. Everybody has something to wish for." Tomoyo persisted.

"What would YOU wish for?" Sakura asked in return. Nine Hundred Ninety Eight. Tomoyo smiled gently, "I asked you first. Come on, Sakura-chan. I'm just curious… If I had one wish… I would wish for… now complete the sentence."

Nine Hundred Ninety Nine.

"I would wish for… Syaoran to be happy."

Her thoughts broke by the distinct sound of the doorbell. Sakura swallowed, taking a quick final look at herself in the mirror. Her heartbeat quickened at the mere thought of him. But why? Why should she even care what she looks like for him? Why did her heart have to thump so loudly when he was near? Sakura knew the answers, and she had tried to deny it for a long time. Though, she did admit to one thing - her heart was always the traitorous one. 'He's here.'

Sakura grabbed her purse and swung it on her shoulder. She took a deep breath in and opened the door with a smile. But to her surprise, it wasn't him. Sakura's eyes widened. She felt a pang of disappointment in her chest.

"Oh good, you're still here!"

Sakura scrunched her face as her best friend walked into her apartment. Her eyes narrowed as she closed the door. Sakura frowned, "T-Tomoyo… what are you doing here?"

"I was afraid you already left. I got here as soon as I could," Tomoyo panted. Confused, Sakura let her in. "As soon as what? What happened? Is there something wrong?" Sakura questioned worriedly.

"Yes! There is something terribly wrong," Tomoyo replied frantically, panic etched into her amethyst eyes. "Is it an emergency? What is it? I just, I'm about to go out now… if it can wait, I would appreciate it," Sakura said nervously. In truth she owed Tomoyo a lot, but this was her date with Syaoran. She couldn't just stand him up…. He would be here any second now.

"That's exactly it! You can't go out! You can't!" Tomoyo exclaimed. Sakura groaned, "Tomoyo-chan…" She didn't have time for this now. Sakura was hoping to drop the bomb on Tomoyo after the date had happened. She knew she'd react like this; she saw it coming from a mile away. And Sakura just didn't want to deal with it on top of everything that was going on. It was something she thought she could avoid until later, but apparently she couldn't even have that small luxury.

"Please don't do this Sakura," she begged, cutting to the chase and getting straight to the point. Tomoyo didn't want her to go out with Syaoran – it was really that simple. "Tomoyo, this does NOT concern you," Sakura protested, more annoyed at her friend's behavior more than anything else.

"I don't care! You can hate me as much as you want for doing this now… but later you will be thanking me! Really, Sakura… what are you doing? What do you think you're doing?" Tomoyo demanded, with a blaze of determination burning in her eyes. "You've worked so hard… now you're going to let it all go down the drain? You're better than this! You deserve more, a lot more than you give yourself credit for. Please, don't do this!"

"You really don't have any right to be saying that," Sakura mumbled.

Tomoyo ignored her and continued her pleadings, "Please, Sakura. Please. I just don't want to see you hurt ever again."

"I can handle myself," Sakura stated. Seeing as she was not getting anywhere with the begging, Tomoyo tried a new tactic. "And you didn't even tell me! What kind of best friend is that?"

"I was going to! But you just make it so hard for me tell you anything doing with Syaoran. I was going to ease you into the idea before you went ballistic on me… like you're doing now!" Sakura yelled.

"I'm only going 'ballistic on you' for your own good! Sakura listen to me. I think this is a mistake. A big huge mistake. A giant mistake that you're going to regret maybe not in the near time future, but definitely in the future. I mean, you spent so long trying to get over him, and finally you did! You don't need him. You really don't. So please don't feel pressured to do anything just because he has asked you to!" she exclaimed. Sakura responded tonelessly, "I make my own decisions, Tomoyo. I acknowledge your input, but it doesn't change anything."

"You don't have to do this," Tomoyo cried out. "I don't have to do this." Sakura repeated, though it was more of a statement to Tomoyo than anything. "You're right… you don't have to." Tomoyo was wary, nervous that she might not actually be getting through to Sakura. It didn't look too good. Sakura was still as stubborn as ever, and she did not seem to be budging even an inch.

"I don't… have to do this," Sakura repeated again, this time as if she was trying to convince herself the fact. Tomoyo nodded mutely, looking encouraging. Maybe she was getting through after all.

"I don't," Sakura paused, "but I want to."

Failure.

Tomoyo was completely crestfallen.

"This is pathetic. Tomoyo, seriously, this is my life. I appreciate your concern, but this really does not have anything to do with you. I make my own decisions, and I will suffer the consequences accordingly, if you're so worried about them."

Tomoyo countered, "And as your best friend, I try to warn you about getting yourself in these type of situations in the first place! I don't want you to suffer consequences! And I'm telling you, nothing good can come from this!"

"Well, maybe you're wrong. Maybe… this is the date of my life. This is the one date that is the very beginning of a new fresh relationship. Maybe this is the one date that I wouldn't miss for the entire world," Sakura argued in return. "I highly doubt that," Tomoyo scoffed.

"Why? You don't even know half of it," Sakura said hotly.

"I know enough. And as your best friend, I'm telling you… begging you… not to do this."

"Why? You don't even have any concrete reasoning." Sakura was just getting plain annoyed now. Tomoyo's behavior was ridiculous. Tomoyo shook her head in disappointment, almost as if the evidence against going out with Syaoran really was that obvious. Tomoyo sighed, "This is the guy who didn't just break your heart, but destroyed it. Do I really need to say more?"

"Tomoyo..." Sakura flustered. That was true, however, that still didn't have any effect on changing Sakura's current decision. The last thing Sakura wanted was Tomoyo bringing forth the heart break situation that Sakura had fought internally earlier. She too was also debating about this whole thing, but in the end she had decided to give Syaoran a shot. She really did not need Tomoyo to bring back up all her doubts. Sakura fumbled, "You just don't get it. I mean…"

Sakura looked down to the ground thoughtfully. Yeah, he did shatter her heart… but that didn't mean she didn't still love him. "You have no idea how much I–"

"But I do!" Tomoyo burst out, cringing.

Sakura's eyes shot up to meet her best friend's. Tomoyo sighed, "Trust me; I do know how much you love him…"

"Then why don't you understand?"

Sakura's eyes revealed disappointment as they searched Tomoyo for answers. Tomoyo didn't answer, for she could not think of anything to say.

The silence was broken by the doorbell.

"Lock up with the spare key," Sakura told her icily, sending shivers down Tomoyo's spine. Sakura had never talked to her with such resentment. Sakura opened the front door only to shut it dramatically behind her.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"Syaoran… this, we're…"

She was lost to words. It was a freaking ring. Yes, he had technically proposed to her. Sort of. And yes, she had sort of rejected him. Sort of. But when he had requested they go out to dinner the last thing she had expected was a ring. It was a ring, for crying out loud. He saw her panicked expression on her face, and the raw fear in her eyes. "It's just a promise ring. Besides, there's a chain so it's more like a necklace."

"It's a bit much for the first date," she protested. Syaoran frowned, "I know we can't pick up from where we left of but… can you expect us to just start from scratch…?"

She froze, and her eyes turned ice cold. Memories began flooding her mind. "Just watch me," she said venomously, not intending to be mean.

"My apologies, I didn't mean to upset you. I just, thought maybe…" he trailed off nervously. "Maybe a gift would be a good start to be making amends?" Sakura provided. Syaoran laughed, "Yeah. It's just the beginning. It's a fresh new start, a… trinket to another chance."

"A second chance? So you think that this all is a second chance? At what? To what?" Sakura demanded. No matter what metaphorical value he placed on the ring; it was still a damn freaking ring. "I do believe you're giving me a second chance, another shot at us. And I do gladly appreciate it. Again, I don't mean to frustrate you, really; that's not my intention," he reassured.

Suddenly he burst out a question. "Should we start over?"

"What do you mean?" Sakura asked, confused at his randomness. Syaoran smiled, holding out his hand across the table. "I'm Li Syaoran; it's a pleasure to see you Sakura. You really look great. I'm so glad you were able to make it tonight. I promise you that you won't regret it."

Sakura smiled back, "Enough with the promises. No promises." She shook his hand. It was a fresh new beginning, after all. Perhaps this time around there would be no broken promises. It would certainly be easy for him not to break any promises if there were no promises to begin with.

"Too soon? It's all right, we do have all night. Just try to enjoy yourself," he requested courteously. She sighed quietly, "I'll try."

"That's really all I ask for." Syaoran smiled.

"Marry me."

Sakura's eyes widened, her whole world coming to a standstill.

Unbelievable.

A long period passed, her eyes staring blankly and in disbelief at him. "Say something," he pleaded, his eyes weary.

Sakura tried to put words together; she tried to make any sense of what he just said. Did he really just say that? She hesitated, "I…I can't… Syaoran, I can't."

He completely deflated. In mere seconds, his whole spirit was crushed. He looked like a little child who had just discovered that there weren't any cookies left in the jar. It was almost like his whole world had come crumbling down in seconds. He couldn't believe her answer – he thought he had a pretty decent shot at her consent. He whispered coarsely, "Why not?"

"Syaoran…" she paused, trying to understand what she wanted to say. The truth was she didn't really know what to say, or how to say it if she did. She just didn't know what to do. She thought about it, trying her hardest to translate her emotions into words. "You've hurt me so much, too much. I want to, I really do," she began cautiously, "but I can't. I've given so much to you. I've given everything I have. There's nothing else I can give to you."

"You've given me everything but the promise that you'll stay with me forever," he said automatically, so defensively.

She was speechless. It was so unreal.

"That's the only thing I want now. That's the only thing that matters, Sakura. I need to make it up to you, I need to get back your trust, and I know that. But I'm afraid I'm going to need an entire lifetime to do so. So please give me the chance. I'd do anything for just a chance," he reached out across the table to hold one of her hands, "please; I want to make it up to you. I made a huge mistake, and I need to undo my wrong. Just a chance, Sakura, that's all I'm asking you."

"No you're not! A chance would be…" she sputtered, "a chance does not mean marriage!"

Syaoran cringed at her outburst.

"I know it's a bit sudden… but it's inevitable. I have no choice. I'm leaving soon."

"Yeah I know that," she snapped, blurting out without thinking, "You're leaving to go marry some stuck up princess."

She blushed, looking away. She didn't mean to say that.

He disregarded her rebuttal. Arguing now would do him no good. "Don't you care?"

"Of course I do!" she exclaimed, her eyes brightening.

"You don't get it… do you?"

Sakura didn't answer.

Syaoran sighed. He regarded her incredulously and told her, "Once I go back, I'm not coming back."

Sakura stared at him for a while, letting the information sink in. She was trying to absorb the situation, trying to understand. Sakura couldn't believe this was even happening. This wasn't the way it was supposed to go.

This was supposed to be her last tie to him. And once the wish was fulfilled, they would both part their separate ways. He would go his way, and she would go hers. She knew he was leaving, and she knew he was never coming back. Her whole wish-operation-plan had depended on him leaving her forever. But this? This wasn't how it was supposed to be, and she understood he was to be married, and she was never to see, think, hear, speak, or love him again. And she wanted it that way; that was the way she planned it to go. She knew he was leaving. She understood he was never coming back. That much, she knew.

She nodded gravely, "I know."

"I had a wonderful night this evening. Did you have fun?"

Sakura nodded as he opened the door to her apartment lobby. "You really don't have to walk me up."

"I would like to," he insisted. "Really… It's alright, I think I'll manage," she replied politely. She really did not feel like having more small talk in her apartment. She did have a great time with him, though the magic of the night would be killed if she had invited him back up to her apartment. The way the night had gone was a perfect ending to the date. Anything more would just be too much. It was better for them to part their separate ways now.

Out of the blue he questioned, almost as an afterthought, "Hey, Sakura… I think we can handle dating, right?"

Sakura blinked at him, puzzled. "What?" She didn't realize that she was just staring at him, clearly out of it.

"Dating," he repeated firmly. "You know, like going on dates. Dinners; hanging out; going out places together… all the usual stuff that dating ensues."

"Dating…" Sakura said the word as if it was the most ridiculous word she had ever heard of.

"Yes, dating. One step at a time. You don't have to look at the big picture right now. All you need to worry about is here and now," he reassured. She didn't have to worry about all the technicalities. None of it concerned her, not really. He would be the one to worry about all that. He would shield her. He wanted to be her protector; he wanted to keep her safe from everything. He always had, and it hurt him that he had to take such baby steps to get close to her again. But he would do what he had to do, anything for her.

It wasn't necessarily annoying, as he enjoyed spending time with her; it was more of a burden on his part because the timing really did suck. But he would do whatever he could do, everything and anything. Syaoran had made up his mind in a split decision when she had given him the cranes. It wasn't really a hard choice to make, as it was lingering in the back of his mind for a long time now. But he knew what he wanted now, then, and forever. He wanted her – Sakura. And only her.

And it was then he had decided that she would be the only one for him. It was then he thought he had a chance with being her again. It was then he had forgotten everything else, and asked her to marry him… right then and there on the spot. It was an involuntary and instinctive voice that had taken over, and soon Syaoran had found himself anxiously and fearfully awaiting her response, his heart pounding so loud that he was certain she could hear it madly beating.

It was then nothing else mattered. It was like he had died, and the only thing that would resurrect him was her agreeing to marry him. At that moment in time, the only thing that held his entire world was her. The only thing that mattered was her. She held his entire being in her hands.

"Hey, don't worry about it okay. Don't look so shocked," he laughed, trying not to freak her out too much. Though it was obvious he already had. Ever since he popped out the ring she was on edge. But who could really blame her? Despite it being a promise ring necklace, it was still a ring, nonetheless. Though, Syaoran did have to admit that it did look beautiful around her neck.

"Sorry," she mumbled, trying to get her brain from going into a mental overload. The dating concept was hard for Sakura's mind to wrap around. Dating? So they were dating now? What really was even dating? When Sakura thought of dating, she thought of awkward 'high school teenagers holding hands, butterflies in your stomach' dating. And now, Syaoran wanted to date. Date?

He kissed her on the cheek, breaking her thoughts about dating. "I'll see you soon," he whispered before walking his way back to his car. All the way up to her apartment, her thoughts fled from the dating concept and moved on to the way his lips had brushed her cheek. He hadn't kissed her in a long time, and even with such a huge time gap; the feeling she got afterwards had never changed. It was still the same heart flipping, butterflies in stomach, completely melting feeling she thought she would never feel towards him again. It kept Sakura in a fuzzy warm daze.

His kiss still lingered on her even after she was under her bed sheets. Dating… perhaps she could handle that after all.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Scrounging around in her purse for her keys, outside her apartment, all Sakura wanted to do was go collapse on her sofa after a very long day. She groaned exasperatingly, where were her damn keys?

After waking up late because her alarm didn't go off and rushing around like a mad chicken - Sakura had left her apartment frantically. She remembered locking the door, and throwing the keys in her purse in a hurry to meet up with Tomoyo. Speaking of which, her cell phone was buzzing, getting in her way of finding her keys.

Sighing, Sakura answered the call. "Hello?"

Tomoyo's voice replied, "Hey you. I just wanted to let you know you dropped your keys in my car… I was going to turn around and-"

Sakura screamed, interrupting her, and not caring about her neighbors or if anybody in the building heard her. She couldn't take it anymore. She dropped the cell phone. Great, just great.

Today was one of the worst days ever. After a long, exhausting day, all Sakura just wanted to relax in her sweet quiet peace alone. But she couldn't even do that, because she had dropped her keys. She was locked out of her own apartment. She banged her head on the door in frustration. "Gah," she said, forgetting she was still on the phone with Tomoyo.

"Sakura! Sakuraaaaa! Sakura-chan! SAKURA!" Tomoyo was yelling, and Sakura picked up the phone from the ground. "What?" Sakura shrieked back, her patience now all gone. "Geez! If you just stop freaking out for a second I said I was going to turn around but then I remembered that I left the spare key under your doormat," Tomoyo explained.

Sakura brightened, and reached down to lift up her doormat. And to her relief, it was there. "'Kay, thanks Tomoyo. I'll just, talk to you later or something. I need quiet now."

"Alright, anytime. Talk to you later," Tomoyo said, hanging up. Sakura put her phone back in her purse, shoving the key into the keyhole. She opened the door, readying herself for some peace when a figure stood up from her couch. All her relaxing thoughts fled her mind.

"Oh, it's you. Great, just what I need," Sakura drawled, sighing heavily.

"I thought I heard a knock… but I wasn't sure if I should get it or not… especially since I'm not supposed to be here and all." He smiled, unsurely. He was walking on extremely thin ice, and he knew it too. Sakura sat down in the nearest sit-able object, her hands covering her face. 'Would this day ever end? Could it get any worse?' She wondered.

"Bad day, huh?" He questioned, though he already knew the answer. "Let me help you."

"Why are you here, Syaoran? What do you want?"

He shrugged, "I just wanted to see you."

"Don't you have things to do, shouldn't you be busy? How did you even get in here?" She demanded, as she got up. The more she thought about it, the more confused she ended up being. "I needed to get away from it all. I needed a place where I'm at peace with myself… Work is so crazy and chaotic… I needed just to get away from it. So I came here…I was just going to drop by, but you weren't home… and then to my advantage… there was a key was under your doorstep…"

"So you let yourself in," she finished for him. He nodded, "Are you mad?"

Was she mad? She made a face. "No… I'm just tired. I've had a long day…" She was so tired that she did not even care anymore. She didn't have the energy to be pissed off at him.

"Have you eaten? I can make something for you if you'd like… or I can go pick up take out if you want," he offered. She shook her head, "I already ate." He quickly noticed the tension in her, and her snappish responses. "Sakura…Relax. Breathe." He approached her. Too tired to object, Sakura let him lead her into her bedroom. He had taken a hold of her hand, and already Sakura felt all her worries melt away. For once, in a long time, she didn't protest against her heart.

She was too tired to argue with herself. Too tired to do anything but follow the little voice in her head that trusted Syaoran with her entire being. Syaoran always had the ability to calm her down, to strip down her walls and leave her with a soothing effect of his presence.

"Forget everything else. It's just you and me."

He laid down beside her, wrapping his arms around her protectively. She clenched the ring that was hanging from her neck, a habit she had been doing more and more often. It reminded her of him; it reminded her of the reality of the situation between them. It was a simple silver ring, smooth to the touch and without any engravement or embossing.

"Syaoran…" she murmured softly."I'm right here, baby. I'm not going anywhere," he whispered in her ear. And even though she held on to him tighter, Sakura let herself go, and she was suddenly reminded of all the wonderful things that she loved about him. It overwhelmed her, and soon she was filled with her love for him. She loved how protected she felt in his arms. It was like she was safe from all the bad things in the world, because he wouldn't them get to her. He would shield her, and she was able to relax with that thought. She wasn't alone; he was right here… right here beside her. And with him right here with her, she felt more loved than ever.

They laid there for awhile, soaking in each other's silence and presence.

"Are you asleep?" he asked, even though he was pretty sure of the answer. He trailed his hands up and down her spine slowly. He savored being so close to her, watching her sleep peacefully.

"God, I love you, Sakura. I love you, I love you…" he murmured into her ear, as he soon drifted to sleep himself.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Sakura laughed wholeheartedly. "Chiharu, that looks amazing. You should definitely get it!"

Chiharu stared at herself in the mirror. "I don't know…" she said unsurely."I'm sure that Takashi will like it!" Naoko smiled reassuringly. "Of course he'll like it," agreed Tomoyo.

"Then it is settled! You're getting it. Aww, there's a long line… Hurry up Chiharu-chan; I'll go line up first." Sakura volunteered and hurried on to the line. Chiharu dashed back into the change room and followed.

Naoko looked wistfully at Sakura at a distance. "Sakura seems a lot happier now; I was really getting worried about her."

"Yeah, Naoko-chan. She's a lot better now, though now that they're back together… I'm really not quite sure what to think anymore," Tomoyo sighed. Naoko made a face, "Sakura is a big girl. I'm sure she'll figure something out."

"I don't know if she knows what's good for her anymore. It's more complicated than ever now," Tomoyo said dejectedly. "Maybe he's exactly what she needs, whether it is good or bad," Naoko suggested. Naoko could tell Tomoyo wasn't all that convinced. "Well, if he makes her smile… and makes her laugh… I think that's good enough. He makes her happy, anybody can tell that… and he obviously cares for her. So why are you so disapproving?" Naoko questioned, full of concern.

Tomoyo's amethyst eyes widened. Was she really that obvious? She hadn't realized that Naoko had picked up on her less than subtle hatred towards Syaoran. "I… just think he's going to hurt her again. And that will really break her… again. She worked so hard getting over him, and moving on. And she was finally ready; she was ready to forget him and get on with her life. Then he snakes his way back in, like he never left. Like he belonged there from the start… and I don't think Sakura should be throwing away all her efforts before and just letting him back into her life. He doesn't deserve it. He doesn't deserve the second chance Sakura's generously giving him," she frowned.

"So you feel betrayed?"

Tomoyo sighed. "Not betrayed, not really. Sakura can't help herself, I know. She loves him, and she probably always has. So it's not her fault… I just wish that maybe she didn't love him so much."

"But he's not a bad person, Tomoyo. You make it sound like he sucks the life out of her… but he doesn't. He's the one who gives her that. He helps Sakura-chan shine," Naoko protested. "He was the one who broke her heart!" Tomoyo exclaimed venomously.

"Yes… but he's also the one that makes Sakura's eyes sparkle every time she talks about him. I think you should give him a little bit more credit…" Naoko informed. "But he's the poison! He's…" Tomoyo argued. "Only in your eyes," Naoko responded in return.

"Hey! Tomoyo! Come look at this!" hollered Chiharu. Tomoyo's thoughts broke away from the feelings of her disdain of Syaoran.

"Coming!" Tomoyo yelled back, quickening her pace to finally head towards Chiharu and Sakura.

"Hey…" Naoko called. Tomoyo slowed down and turned around and looked Naoko in her eyes, "Tomoyo, I thought Syaoran was going back to China soon…" Naoko trailed off, deep in thought.

"He is," she confirmed grimly.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"Because we belong together."

"How do you know that?" she questioned, giving him a disbelieving look. He said it so naturally, so full of confidence and nonchalance.

He frowned. "Can't you feel it?"

She almost blurted out a yes, an agreement, but she caught herself. She knew better. "No, I don't. Not really," she lied, denying her ardent feelings for him. Syaoran was crestfallen at her response.

"How many times do I have to apologize before you let me back in?" he asked in a soft voice.

Sakura sighed. 'As many times as it takes,' she thought. How could she possibly just let him back in? She had been building herself up ever since he broke her. She had slowly built a wall. A wall so strong that she had isolated herself from the whole world just to keep her heart safe. Now, her heart was just beginning to mend, and he wanted to… he expected her to just let him back in? Did he want her to pretend like nothing had happened? Like he never hurt her? How was she supposed to trust him… when she remembered every single little detail of how much he hurt her? Sakura just couldn't do it. She couldn't trust somebody who had just completely destroyed her. "I don't know," she answered.

"Sakura, I—"

"Don't," she cut him off before he could say it. She didn't want to hear it, not now. Because if he did, she wouldn't be able to control herself. If he said it, then she'd get all emotional and probably leap into his arms and he'd embrace her and everything would seem like it'd all be okay. It'd seem like it would all get better. And maybe it would… or maybe it wouldn't. Sakura didn't know. But she did know, if he said it, there would be no stopping her from letting her heart loose, and that was never good. When her heart was in control, she could do things that she would possibly regret later on. Sakura could see herself right now, if he said it. Those three words that used to mean the world to her, those three little words that he'd use to completely capture her. From his voice, those three words used to be her very weakness. Her kryptonite.

And even now, the three words didn't exactly affect her as they used to. But Sakura was pretty sure that they would still be an impact on her good judgment. She'd be in his arms instantly, and she would have this sense of belonging overwhelming her. His hands would be at her waist, bringing her closer, making her feel protected. He wouldn't let anything hurt her at all. Her hands would be in his gorgeous soft brown hair, and she would find herself looking into his memorizing amber eyes. And pretty soon, it would be certain that they would be kissing…

"I lov—"

"I said don't!" She raised her voice, her eyes blazing with determination. She could not let her heart win.

He sounded confused, "Why not?"

Her eyes softened, "Because I don't want to hear it right now, okay? I just, I can't. No."

She sounded firm, but inside she was anything but certain. How she wanted to bury her head into his chest… how she longed for his strong arms to be around her… how she felt so at home and so right when they were together. It was like nothing else mattered at the moment, nothing at all. All that existed at the time was him and her, and nothing could ever break them apart. But that was all before… before he broke her heart and shattered her entire world. And like all the good times Sakura remembered of them, she would never forget how broken he had made her. She could never forget how empty and completely pathetic he had forced her to become. She would never forget. She could not forget. Not ever.

His tone was soothing, "I'm not going to hurt you again. I promise. I've learned from my mistakes."

As much as she wanted to believe him, she couldn't. As much as she wanted to trust him, she couldn't. As much as she wanted to confide in him, she couldn't. As much as she wanted to give him back her whole heart and soul, she couldn't. As much as she wanted to make him her other half, she couldn't. As much as she wanted to pretend he had never broken her heart… she couldn't. Nothing could change the past, but that didn't mean that she had to welcome him into her arms as if nothing ever happened either. Sakura sighed, "Don't promise me anything, Syaoran. I'm done with promises." She added silently, 'Especially yours.'

"Just because of me? You can't just give up hope because of me." He reached out to touch her, and she let him. A shiver ran down her spine, and her heart yearned for him to be closer. She felt that pull, that need that her heart demanded her to fulfill.

"I didn't give up hope," Sakura argued, her voice as soft as a whisper. She was losing.

"You just don't trust me." Syaoran's voice was dead serious, just as the look in his eyes was. Sakura knew that look well; she had come to love it. He was looking at her with such love and dedication that it scared her. But now, he just looked more hurt than anything. 'Well good, make him suffer. Just like he hurt you.' A voice in Sakura's head told her on instinct. But Sakura knew she didn't think that way; she wasn't like that. She wasn't the person who desired revenge, especially to the people she loved. She was a very forgiving person, but with Syaoran… it was different. He had really hurt her, and his forgiveness would come in its due time. And even though he had pierced a stake through her heart… she would never… she could never hurt him in return. She could never wish Syaoran any harm, no matter how much he had hurt her.

"That's not it," she said, shaking her head. She didn't know how, but her body had unconsciously moved closer to his. She could smell his light cologne mixed in with his own distinct smell. It used to drive her insane, and it probably still did. But Sakura had enough trouble in the sanity department by herself without Syaoran's smell's help.

"Really?" he sounded amused now, "Then what is it Sakura?" Sakura saw the sparkle of hope flicker in his eyes. Sakura closed her eyes. The less she could be less distracted by his attributes, the better. Her heart was pounding already just by his presence alone, she didn't need his amazing features to further persuade her to let her heart take over. "I can't… I won't let myself…" she trailed off, not knowing quite what to say. His smell was getting to her, and she felt him gently pull her body towards his. She suddenly felt so weak, so pathetic. How could he do this to her? Sakura knew the answer. Though she didn't want to admit it, not to herself, not to anybody… and especially not to him.

"You won't let me get close to you again. You won't even trust me anymore. How can we have a relationship if you won't trust me?" he whispered in her ear.

Sakura took a deep breath in, and pushed him away subtly. She asked him, "Why are you trying so hard?"

His answer was immediate, "Because I love you? And I'm not going to lose you again. Not ever. We are meant to be; we belong together. My heart can't just afford to be 'just friends' with you."

Sakura laughed. She knew he was being serious, but really, could he have said something any sappier? How more cliché could he possibly get? How desperate was he? Syaoran's eyes and expression were grave, especially at her amused outburst. It crossed him for a second that Sakura only regarded him as a joke. A fool. But he quickly dismissed the thought; he knew Sakura was better than that. "You don't honestly expect me to believe all that crap, do you?" Sakura broke out into a smile. Syaoran couldn't help but to smile back, despite his current situation.

"I was serious Sakura. It is surprising that you can laugh about a matter so important to me." He picked up the ring hanging from the chain and brought it to his lips. "This is no joke, Sakura. It's as real as it will ever get."

The smile disappeared off her face. She placed her hand over his that was now clutching the ring. She murmured, "I know." And maybe she had a glimpse of how sorry Syaoran was, but that didn't mean she was ready to forgive him. Yes, he was willing to marry her, and marriage was not just any thing. It was to unite two people who loved each so much that they were willing to dedicate their whole lives to each other. It was the real thing. It was forever.

"I'd do anything to make it up to you. It's all about now, Sakura. Now and our forever… I know I can't change the past. And I would never want to hurt you, ever. Please know that… but I also acknowledge what I've done to you. And I can't change that, no matter how much I want to. Because really, I just see it as an ordeal that has helped me realize what you mean to me. And that more than anything, is crucially important. All I want to do is make it up to you… can't you see that?"

"I don't know," she whispered.

He let the ring drop gently back on her chest, bringing her hand up to his shoulder and placing it there. He looked upon her lovingly, full of devotion and passion. "I wish… maybe not now… but I wish you would just trust me."

"I wish we could be together."

The words slipped right from her mouth. She didn't mean to; she didn't want to admit it to him. Sakura did not want Syaoran to know. Once she realized she said it, she wanted to snatch it all back up. She recoiled her hands away him, stunned. Syaoran smiled at her, locking her eyes with his.

"Why wish when you can make it come true?"

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Sakura let him take her out on more dates, and as the days went by, the more right it felt. It became a lot easier for them to connect and have a good time. And pretty soon it felt like it was almost back to normal. Back to the good old days, where they laughed and enjoyed every second they were together. However, despite the pockets of happiness Syaoran brought her, there were times she wanted absolutely nothing to do with him. Mostly, their dates were thoroughly enjoyable, but they weren't all full of smiles and sunshine.

It was extremely tempting for Sakura to forget all of her heartbreak for him but she just couldn't. Even though it felt as if they had never been apart or broken up - Sakura could never forget. It was always lingering somewhere at the back of the mind. And because of this, she could never fully give herself to him. There was always something holding her back from fully trusting him.

Syaoran noticed this, and tried not to push it. He knew she was being very cautious and careful with him, and he was glad she had let him get this close to him. But the truth of the situation was that he was running out of time, and he couldn't afford to be deathly patient with her.

"I love you so much. Can't you see that?" he asked one day aimlessly. By now Sakura was used to his random questions and pleadings. She wasn't always prepared when he asked him, and he often caught her off guard, but the determination to not let her heart win never died. "I don't know," she replied tiredly. It was always the same argument. And she always seemed to give the same or similar vague answer.

He was getting more impatient with every question he asked. "Why won't you let me back in?"

It seemed it was always her who ruined the moment. "Because you broke my heart… Syaoran." She sighed.

He shrugged nonchalantly, "That's fixable."

Sakura couldn't believe what he was saying. "How are you going to fix it!" she challenged, sensing that tense feeling she always got right before they got into an argument.

"I don't know how yet. But I will!" he told her unwaveringly. His strong-willed determination burned through his amber eyes.

"You can't just 'fix' it Syaoran; a broken heart can't just be 'fixed' like… like a broken window or something!" she exclaimed furiously. She was shocked that he was even considering this. She couldn't believe they were even having this conversation. If only life were that easy.

"Why not? I don't see any problem with treating a broken heart like a broken window. It needs to be fixed, so I'll fix it." His logic was so simple, so straightforward. But love didn't work that way… love didn't have to make sense.

"It's not that easy! A broken heart can't just be… you can't just take out your glue gun and put the pieces back together! It doesn't work that way!" She yelled at him. She felt her anger bubble up inside her. His eyes turned hard. He didn't have any patience left to be understanding with her this time. "I don't see why it wouldn't work out! You always have to complicate things when really they can be as simple as you want them to be. Sometimes life isn't as intricate as you think it is."

She couldn't believe what he was saying. She stared at him impassively, getting more pissed off as the time ticked away. "I'm sick and tired of waiting, Sakura. I do love you. And it hurts me so much that you can't accept that. I've been trying to be patient; I've been trying to go at your pace. But it frustrates the hell out of me. I don't see why you can't just make both our lives easier and just let me back in already. How much longer will I have to prove myself to you? Why… why won't you trust me?" It was always the same questions, always the same reasoning.

"You broke my heart, shattered it into tiny little pieces…" she trailed off, her emerald eyes sad, "I've been trying to put it back together for some time now. And they stick together for awhile, only for it to just fall apart again. Sometimes I think I've really done it; I've really put myself back together and things will turn out okay. But then sooner or later… I realize I've only done some temporary thing, and I just fall apart all over again," she explained, her voice quiet.

She continued, in her defense. "You just can't glue it. It's not sticking… it doesn't stick. Whatever I'm doing… it isn't working. So I'm sorry if it seems like I'm stalling or whatever, that really isn't the case. I'm not trying to make you wait out until you go crazy, Syaoran. I care about you. This is just something I need to do. I'm sorry if it's not fast enough for you, but I'm not ready yet. And if you can't accept that, then maybe it's better off that you leave me alone. I'm not ready. I still need time to figure out things… to figure out myself. So if you can't be mature enough to accept that… then please just go."

He grumbled some incoherent things, running his hands through his hands. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I snapped at you. It's been a hellish week, and I didn't mean to take it out on you. Really, I'm sorry. I don't mean to rush you, I don't. I don't want to rush you. I'll wait. I'm sorry. I've been really stressed out and I'm sorry," he apologized.

"It's… alright," she said, even though she knew it wasn't. "You can't think that you can fix it though, okay? It… doesn't work that way. Life doesn't always work that way. Love doesn't work that way. My heart isn't just something you can fix with your trusty glue gun."

He seemed genuinely puzzled. "Why not?" He was such a guy.

"Because it's like a shattered mirror… it will never be the same again!" she exclaimed. "Sometimes it's better to leave it broken, then to hurt yourself trying to fix it."

"I'll risk it. I'd do anything for you," he swore. She smiled weakly - she knew that all too well. "While trying to fix it you'll get hurt in the process, so ultimately it's not worth it."

"Let me decide for myself if it's worth it or not," he responded fiercely.

"Does it even matter?" she questioned softly, more to herself than to him.

"Yes!"

She looked up to him with disheartened eyes. "Even if you put all the pieces back together, and you manage to keep them stuck together… you'll still see the cracks. You'll always see the broken pieces of the whole."

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"Sakura?"

"Oh… Syaoran…" Her emerald eyes widened in surprise. She quickly wiped away her tears, forcing a smile. She stood up from the ground, trying to appear invulnerable. Her walls were building themselves back up. Though it was no use trying to hide it from him… he immediately saw her watery eyes, her red nose and the weak fake smile. He also could tell by the insecurity of her voice.

"What's wrong?" he murmured, closing the distance between them. She disregarded his question. "What are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you. It's awfully late…" She tried to take a step back away from him. He reached out to touch her, to comfort her, to reassure her. Sakura jerked away coldly. "Don't," she warned.

He caught her gaze. His warm amber eyes meeting her bright determined ones, "It's okay, Sakura. It's just me." She shook her head. "What's wrong?" he repeated again, this time softer, his voice full of concern. Sakura simply shook her head again. It was her body language for 'No. I don't want to tell you. I'm not going to tell you.' He moved forward again, and she struggled to keep the distance between them. "Please?" he whispered, attempting to gain permission.

"What's wrong?" he asked again, looking at her with nothing but love.

"Nothing," she said, looking down to the ground. "Why are you even here, Syaoran?"

"After a long hard day's of work… I like to get away from it all. And I only can…" he moved closer to her. And she finally let him, let his arm circle around her waist and let his nose smell her hair. His lips were at her ear, "when I'm with you."

Her arms went around him; she griped the back of his shirt. "You make me the happiest…" she sighed, "and also the saddest." And the burst of tears she was holding back started to all spill out. "Shh," he told her, lifting her up gently into his arms. "Syaoran…" she mumbled as he laid down beside her in her bed. His strong arms encircled her as she wept quietly. He whispered comforting things to her, trying to calm her down. "It's okay. It's alright. Shh," he told her as he held her tighter. i

"What happened to us?" she asked, blubbering. "We used to be…so… well perfect."

"And we're not anymore?" he questioned. She nodded, "Not anymore. Now… we're…I… you… Everything is just…" She sobbed. "Sakura," he looked her in her brilliant green eyes, "breathe. Come on, breathe in… breathe out." She listened to him, heaving in deep heavy breaths while crying. One of his hands came up to wipe away her tears. "Don't look at…me. Please," she pleaded. "Why?" he asked, one of his eye brows shot up.

"I must look like a complete wreck. I hate… you seeing me like this," she whimpered. "Why? I think you're beautiful," he smiled at her. His comment only seemed to send a spasm of cries through her. "Stop it," Sakura sniveled. "What? Seeing you cry like this just makes me sad… but you can never be ugly. Ever," he reassured.

"I just… this isn't how it's supposed to be. This isn't how we're supposed to be. The whole dating thing or whatever we are now… it's just so wrong. It isn't how it's supposed to be. We… I don't know. I just… miss it. Our… how we were… before. Before all this happened. It used to be so easy… being together was effortless, it was so right. Now… it isn't. Oh, it just isn't anymore. Everything has changed now… and this isn't how it was supposed to be between us," she bawled.

"How do you know all that?" he inquired. "I don't know," she moaned, "everything is just so screwed up. I'm so messed up. It's just all wrong."

"The only thing wrong is that you're crying about this all. You shouldn't be thinking of this. You shouldn't be focusing on what's bad. And you're not messed up, at all," he told her, holding her gaze to prove to her how serious he was. "I just… I just… w-we…" she sputtered.

"Are meant to be," he finished for her.

"Maybe we're not," she argued. He looked at her in disbelief, "Not what?"

"Not meant to be…" she repeated quietly, her tears still streaming down her cheeks.

"How can you say that?"

"Because it's true," she replied.

"No, it's not. You're wrong," he argued.

"You've done nothing to prove me otherwise," she retorted back.

His facial expression showed his astonishment. "Because you won't let me."

She closed her eyes, tears still falling. "We'll get through this. Sakura… I love you. That's all that matters… really that's all. That's all I care about. You're…" he trailed off, deep in thought, "we'll get through this, I prom-" Her eyes snapped open to look at his gentle brown orbs.

"And what if we don't?" she cut him off harshly, not wanting any of his promises.

"Sakura… If you keep doubting, then you're just self-fulfilling your doubts. If you keep doubting us and not trying… then yes, your doubts are bound to come true. But that's only because in your mind you have already given up. If you give up already… then we have already lost. Then you're right… if you're not even trying anymore… then we won't get through this. But I haven't given up hope, and neither should you," he said to her sadly.

"We shouldn't have to fight to be together. I shouldn't have to hang on to you so tightly because I'm scared I'm going to lose you any second now. It shouldn't be like that. We shouldn't have to be working so hard to make this work. Love doesn't work that way. I don't want us to be this way," Sakura explained.

"I love being with you. I love you and I will fight to be with you. I know we shouldn't have to… but the world isn't perfect. You won't always get what you want… and it's then up to you to fight for it. I'm fighting for you, Sakura. It'll all be okay. We'll be okay," he reassured with confidence.

"How do you even know we'll be okay?"

"You've just got to trust me. You've got to let me in. I'm not going to hurt you… I'm… I want to be here for you. And I always will. I'm here for you Sakura…" Syaoran kissed her forehead.

"Sometimes I feel so alone… so empty," she confessed, water welling up in her eyes once more.

"Oh, Sakura. You're never alone. You have so many friends who love you so much and would do anything for you. And… there's always going to be me. I'm not going to let you feel alone anymore. Please… believe me. You're not alone. You'll never be alone. Ever. I won't let you; I won't let you be alone. Believe me Sakura. You are not alone," he told her gravely, trying to emphasize how serious he was.

"Why should I?" she blubbered, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Because…" he tightened his grip around her, "I can meld your pieces back together."

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"Why does it have to be all or nothing?"

Syaoran sighed. This wasn't something he was planning on getting into. It was something much more complicated. "Because I'm running out of time. I'm not getting any younger. And my mother isn't getting any more patient as the days go by. They need a leader, Sakura. And I'm her heir."

This was always one of his biggest concerns. Not only would it cause problems back in China, but Sakura would not be happy about it either. He knew this, and saw it coming. "So you're just going to rush me? You're just going to push me until I go over the edge and agree to marry you?"

"You know that's not it," he argued.

"It seems like it to me," she persisted.

"Then you really have no idea how much I care for you. You really don't know the lengths I've gone through just to get this extension for you. The strings I've pulled, the favours I've called upon… everything I've done recently is to try to make you as happy as possible. I'm trying to get your trust back… I'm trying with everything I have."

Sakura didn't say anything to that.

"Sakura… Kinomoto Sakura, I'm willing to give up everything for you. Can't you see that?"

Sakura refused to meet his soft gentle eyes. "Then why don't you?"

Syaoran's eyes widened. "Is that what it's going to take? If I give up everything I've ever known, ever worked for, ever strived for… will you forgive me then?"

"I don't know."

"If you take everything away from me but you, would you marry me?" he whispered, pleadingly.

And at the moment in time, Sakura realized that he was dead serious. He would give up everything, literally everything, just for her. He would leave it all behind in a heartbeat as long as he had her. In a flash, he would walk away from it all. He would do it. If she asked him to, he would. But she couldn't; she never wanted to hurt him… not like this. She couldn't ask him to sacrifice everything he's worked so hard for. She wouldn't dare dream about ever asking him. That would be selfish, vengeance… as if she was trying to hurt him as much as he hurt her. But Sakura would never do that; it never crossed her mind. She would never want revenge on him, never. "I wouldn't do that to you."

"Why not?"

'Because I love you.' Sakura didn't dare say what she felt, what she wanted to really say. "Because that's just stupid, Syaoran."

"I don't think it's stupid."

"You're being pathetic. Desperate. You'd really walk away from your whole family just for me? Your career, your obligations, your dreams that you've worked towards your entire life? Just for me?"

"I would," he replied, in a deadpan tone.

"You're crazy," she breathed, equally as serious as he was.

Syaoran smiled weakly, "Just crazy for you."

Sakura rolled her eyes, knowing that the seriousness was gone for the time being. But he'd bring it up again.

He always did.

Though little did he know that… you can't win a battle that's already lost.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"YOU! You! You! You! YOU! You!"

Eriol leaped in front of his spazzing girlfriend immediately, in hopes to avoid a huge mess he'd have to clean up later, "Tomoyo, calm down; I can explain." He took a hold of her shoulders firmly. But it was no use, she was already so gone. She was already so blinded with the fury and hatred that she had kept inside her for so long. There really was no point to try to stop her now.

"NO. Get out of my way Eriol. Right now," Tomoyo seethed. Sighing, he released her and said a silent prayer for his soon to be dead cousin. At least he tried. "I cannot believe you dare show your face here!" she began, her eyes furiously livid. "You inconsiderate worthless jerk! How dare you? Who do you think you are? Do you really think that highly of yourself that you can just come and go whenever you please? That you can gallivant where you want because you're just some rich heir bastard to some stupid corporation? Who gives you the right to even be here? Just because you're cousins with him, doesn't give you any right to be here! I don't care if you're freaking cousins, I really don't! There is nothing stopping me from kicking your insensitive ass out of my apartment!"

And you would think Tomoyo would be a bit more… mature about the whole matter, as she continued to scream, trash around, and fire endless insults.

"You are such a bastard! I cannot believe you! I just can't! First you break my best friend's heart! And then you somehow manage to convince her that you still love her! How could you? What kind of sick demented person could do that? You took advantage of Sakura way too many times! You manipulated her! You took advantage of her feelings for you. All you do is think of yourself! You conceited worthless piece of shit! You do not deserve her! You do not! Don't ever think you do! If you only knew what Sakura has done for you… all the nights she cried over you… and then finally, finally when I think she's finally coming to her senses and ready to let you go – YOU COME BACK and start the whole thing over again! How completely insensitive can you be?"

Syaoran just sat there, taking everything in. Not daring saying a word, or a rebuttal, or anything. He... didn't even try to.

Because she was right about everything.

After a while of her screaming, Syaoran couldn't take it anymore. "Are you done now?" Syaoran asked, not meaning to be rude. It was just a question, and the truth was he still had a lot of things to do, places to go, and stuff to finish up before he left. He couldn't afford to waste any precious time. Tomoyo, of course, took the question as an insult. "Am I done now? Am I DONE NOW!" she shrieked in disbelief.

It had only triggered a whole more lot of curse words. She looked about ready to start throwing stuff at him, her eyes blazing with fury.

Finally, after she seemed to calm down some, she told him in a dangerously venomous voice, "Get out. Just get out. I never want to see your face ever again. Just get out now!"

"But…wait, Tomoyo," he tried to reason with her.

"NO. GET OUT RIGHT NOW!" she screamed, deeming him not even worth her yelling at him. "Hang on for a second! Just listen to me… please!" he requested with desperation in his eyes.

But Tomoyo didn't care. She didn't say anything but she didn't need to. Her narrowed amethyst eyes that were like sharp daggers said enough.

"Can you give her this for me?" he questioned softly, pleadingly. He held out a letter.

Tomoyo store blankly at him. Her angry loathing concentration broke. "W-What is it?" She hesitated, not moving to accept the envelope.

Syaoran sighed. "I can't tell her goodbye. Not now, not like this. So this at least gives her something…"

"What do you mean?" she demanded. He ignored her, not having much energy left in him. "You can read it if you like, I don't really care. As long as you give it to her, please… that's all I'm asking you. If you can do this one thing for me—"

"Why should I do anything for you?" Tomoyo burst out, knocking his hand with the letter. Syaoran frowned, and went to go retrieve the letter from the floor. He held it out to her again. "Because, if you do… you'll get what you want. I'll be gone. You or Sakura will not have to deal with me anymore; you won't even see me anymore. I'll be gone from her life. Isn't that what you want?" He shoved the envelope in her hand. "Please, just give it to her. If you really want me away from her, then you'll give it to her."

Tomoyo stammered, losing her composure. "W-What do you mean?"

Syaoran took a deep breath in. "I'm getting married," he exhaled exasperatingly, "in less than a month. She doesn't know that… that if she didn't agree to marry me within the month that I'd have to marry the fiancée my Mother has for me. And Sakura doesn't need to know. I… She's better off without me; I see that now. And I knew that I would have to make a choice, and I have. And I also intend to stick to my decision, no matter the circumstance. There's no turning back now… it's done with. It's over. Whatever is… or was between Sakura and I, is over now. So, I hope you can be satisfied with that…." With that being said, he turned to leave. His business here was done.

"Wait," she called out.

Syaoran looked back at her curiously.

She groaned, putting a hand to cover her face.

"I hate you for what you did to her. I absolutely do. Nothing will ever change that. You… you didn't see how she was like. You didn't see how broken she was…. You can't even imagine. It tore me up inside… to see her like that. I couldn't understand how you could possibly do something like that to her. And Sakura's so strong; she was able to cope with it. Not at first, but she eventually found a way to deal with it. And then you just come and snake your way back… and I'm so afraid you're going to just hurt her again. But… you know how she is – solid as a rock. She didn't listen to me. Her heart is so biased to you. She still loved you so much, so deeply. And I couldn't understand that, and I realize that now. You'll never know what exactly you did to her. And for that… I do hate you, Li. But, in the end… you're the only one who can make her completely happy."

There were tears in her eyes.

Syaoran regarded her sadly. His eyes deep and thoughtful, "I wish that were true. But it's not, and I can't change that."

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"Mother." Syaoran nodded.

"Xiao Lang, you're late. I personally ensured your return myself. If I do recall, your scheduled flight was exactly three days ago. What a shame, did you think I would not notice? I was beginning to wonder if you were ever planning to return at all."

Syaoran stiffened. Over the years, his feelings towards his mother never had changed. She was still the very frightening and intimidating woman he never dared to forget. She was the last woman anybody would even think to mess with, and the only woman that Syaoran had arduously tried his entire life to please. "I had some unfinished business. I had to make sure everything would run smoothly in my absence," he replied.

"Very well," she seemed unconvinced, "how is the company doing there? I do trust your judgment, though your monthly reports are rather scarce."

"There's not much more to say. But, it's doing quite well, under its circumstances."

"Circumstances?" she questioned.

"Yes. There has been a few… minor difficulties. Nothing to worry about, though," he assured, rather nervously.

"I would only hope so. I entrusted the Japanese branch of the company to you, Xiao Lang. It was completely under your care and control. If it deemed inadequate to meet the standards… how will I know that you can handle the actual company as my heir? I have gone under great measures for this company, and I do not intend to let you run it to the ground. I've put in great effort to train and prepare you, and now I can only hope you will do me proud."

"Of course." Syaoran tried to keep his despise out of his voice. His mother was always like this; she always expected him to be more. It was always more. He was never enough. Despite him being the youngest, he was the only son – the only one who was truly valued. He was the precious son.

"I'm sure they will survive somehow without you. They will learn in time. I can't expect a lot so soon, so we will see how it all goes. Monitoring the branches is the least of my concerns right now," she said, dismissing his progress just like that.

"Yes," Syaoran agreed, as if he actually had a choice.

"Now, in regards to that girl…"

"Mother… I…" Syaoran sputtered.

"Have you done what I've asked you to?" she asked curiously. Syaoran didn't answer right away. She sighed. "I hoped that you knew what was best. If you've done what was inevitable, you've made the right choice." Syaoran wondered how encouraging and supportive she really thought she was. To her, she was only looking into the best interest of the next heir, the next person to take over her position.

"She's gone," he admitted after a while, not being able to look directly in her daunting dark eyes. He felt something sharply pull one of his heart strings, as if he couldn't bare the fact that Sakura was actually gone.

Yelan smiled. It was frightening and bitter, full of both pride and satisfaction. There was not a slightest hint of remorse.

"Welcome home, son."

Home… He was home.

Collapsing on his king sized bed; his room did not change all that much since the last time he had been there. Hell, not a lot changed since he had finished high school. His room was neat and tidy, not a thing out of its place. It was always orderly, well, with the maids' help, of course. It was an awfully plain room. It was spacious and there wasn't anything out of the ordinary about it. There was nothing special about the room. Except for the fact that it was his room.

Syaoran glanced around at his belongings scattered around his room. He grew up in this room. He had childhood memories in this room. He also had a lot of other memories in this room. He let his mind wander… and his thoughts were only focused on one thing. Or rather… someone.

"Sakura…." He said her name without even realizing he had spoken. He chastised himself. He couldn't think of her now. Syaoran then laughed bitterly. When didn't he think about her?

She was always on his mind.

Though he tried not to. He actively tried not to think about her. She wasn't a part of his life anymore. She wasn't his to think about.

He suddenly remembered when he first brought Sakura to China. She had been so amazed about everything. And yet, even his boring dull room had managed to keep her entertained. "I just… always wanted to know what you room looked like. The one back in your apartment hardly looks lived in at all. I always wondered what your room looked like, your real room. They say you can tell a lot about the person by their room… So…this is the Prince's room." Her voice and laugh were so clear in his head, almost as if she was right beside him presently.

He had tried to fight for her… and he failed. Now he had to move on with his life and live with the decision he made. At least it had made his Mother happy. She was glad that Syaoran had come to realize that marrying Mei Ling was the right thing to do. It would provide a stable connection for the company and it looked good for show. Of course, it was all about making the family name look good. It always was.

And as the only son, Syaoran was able to live up to his mother's extremely high expectations. He should feel proud, feel satisfied. He hadn't let her down. Her precious son hadn't disappointed her. Yelan had always expected more from her son. She knew that he'd be a great leader that one day would take over her position. So she always pushed him harder than her girls. She needed him to be tough; she needed him to be strong. And one day, he would make her proud.

He was the golden son.

Perhaps, that day had finally come. He was sacrificing his freedom for her, maybe finally that would be enough. Perhaps finally Syaoran had found a way to impress his mother – by marrying the bride of her choice. The bride that wasn't Sakura.

Sakura…. He sighed wistfully. Her laughter and smile filled his mind. He hoped that impressing his mother and making her proud was worth giving up Sakura. He never wanted to give her up, but he didn't have any other choice. The inevitable decision frustrated him, though he knew there was no point in beating himself over it now. He made his decision, and hoped with his entire being that he wouldn't regret it for the rest of his life. He looked around his room again. It was home. Here was his home.

Everything was the same. Same frightening mother, same deathly annoying sisters, same maids, same butlers, same amazing Chinese food, same smell, same gorgeous view, same family politics, same… well same everything.

So why didn't it feel like home?

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"Sakura…" Tomoyo looked at her best friend. Sakura hadn't looked so… lost since her heartbreak.

"Please, Tomoyo-chan, it's like he's disappeared into thin air. He won't answer any of my calls, and he never calls me anymore. I don't know what to think of it. It's so odd… it's such strange behavior for him. At first I thought he is probably busy at work, seeing as his hectic schedule is rather stressful. But, I haven't heard of him in two whole weeks, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't concerned. I just… I know you know something… it's written all over your face," Sakura accused.

"I tried being patient… I tried forgetting about it… that he'd contact me soon. I thought I could wait. I thought that I could wait it out. Maybe give him a little space to think or whatever he needed. I didn't want to be clingy… overly worried. I thought he'd get back to me sooner or later. I thought I'd give him his space… but I haven't even gotten a message. It's so weird, he was usually so in my face. Then suddenly, there's nothing. I know something has happened, and I know you know it. So please…please," she begged. "I don't know what you're talking about. I have no idea. I haven't…" Tomoyo began to deny.

"Please don't lie to me Tomoyo-chan." Sakura cut her off, seeing straight through her friend. Tomoyo sighed, the last thing she wanted to do was lie straight out to Sakura. "I'm sorry, Sakura. I'm so sorry," she apologized.

"I don't want your apologies. I want you to tell me why Syaoran has been avoiding me lately. I want to know what happened to him," Sakura stated. Tomoyo buried her face in her hands. "He's gone," she mumbled guiltily after awhile. Tomoyo couldn't stand lying to Sakura straight to her face. Tomoyo moved to her drawer where she had kept his letter.

"What?" Sakura was dumbfounded, unable to comprehend what Tomoyo had just said. Tomoyo retrieved the letter and handed it over to Sakura, her eyes remorseful.

"And when were you planning to give this to me?" Sakura demanded; she was half shocked that her own best friend would keep something this important from her, yet half relieved to still have some connection with Syaoran. He didn't just leave her with nothing. A spark flickered in Sakura's heart.

Did Tomoyo really hate Syaoran that much? Sakura never realized.

"I… I didn't… I haven't decided. I mean, I couldn't decide. I didn't know how, or when, or if. I didn't know what to do, I… I'm so sorry Sakura. Really, I was just so confused about the whole thing. I wanted to protect you and I know this letter would just upset you. But he asked me to give it to you, awhile ago… but I couldn't. I just couldn't," Tomoyo confessed.

"Why not?" Sakura blurted, still too stunned to think clearly.

"I don't know. I guess I wanted to make sure he was really gone first," she replied sorrowfully.

"You had no right."

"Sakura-chan, I know but…"

"There's no buts. But what? What could possibly make you keep something like this from me? There are no excuses, absolutely none." Sakura's eyes were blazing.

"He's already getting married Sakura! Married! Next week! Eriol is in China right now preparing and Syaoran has been trying to break it off for the longest time now, but he just can't post-pone it any longer. It didn't seem like you had interest in marrying him right now, and he had to get married to somebody. In the end… he just ran out of time and you were simply just a further complication…. It's BETTER this way! Really! You were ready to let him go, remember? You were ready to severe all ties against him and let go! So who cares about him? Really? You were ready to move on, and now he is too!" Tomoyo exclaimed wholeheartedly. She really did believe that, she believed with her whole heart that Sakura was better off without Syaoran. She was a lot better off without him.

"It's not your decision to make," Sakura told her scornfully.

She quickly scanned over the letter. Each word clinging to her heart.

It was a blur of words: I'm sorry; getting married; I ran out of time; I'm so sorry; you are beautiful; sorry; didn't mean for it to be this way; not the way I wanted us to end; sorry. She reread over the whole letter, trying not to focus only on the keywords that her brain had managed to pick out the first time. Tears welled up in her eyes. He left her, and this was the letter to prove it. The letter that told her that he couldn't dare tell her goodbye, but that a goodbye was inevitable.

The letter was signed. Yours forever, Li Syaoran.

Sakura's first instincts kicked in. Her hands were shaking. She didn't even realize she was yelling, "That jerk! If he thinks can leave without telling me, he's got another thing coming!"

Tomoyo looked at her cautiously… unsure what to say at her outburst. Sakura was hysterical. Rational thoughts fled her mind. "How dare he leave me? A letter? He just gives me some stupid letter that says goodbye? He can't even tell me goodbye to my face? He's such a sick bastard! After everything he's been trying to work towards… getting back my trust and… and he just threw it all away? After all the efforts… it comes down to this? A letter?

I can't believe him. I can't believe this. He's such a fucking coward. Did he honestly think this would be okay? That this letter would suffice? What was he thinking? Was he even thinking? He's so stupid! How could he? How could he?" She suddenly remembered his promise ring, and her hand went automatically to it, trying to break the chain off her neck. Sighing in frustration, she reached up and undid the chain. She clenched it in her palm, just about ready to chuck it out the window.

Then his voice suddenly echoed in her mind. "I can meld your pieces back together."

Her eyes widened. "Even if you do succeed to do that…" she trailed off, shaking her head. She refused to look at him. "There will always be scars. I will never forget."

"Neither will I."

She looked at him skeptically, "We'll see about that."

She opened her palm up slowly, staring at the ring for a long time. His smile flashed before her and she couldn't take it anymore.

Sakura broke down. "I don't understand. I just don't understand. He was trying so hard… then he suddenly just gives up? How can just give everything up? How could he give me up?"

"Oh, Sakura. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry." Tomoyo comforted.

She was heaving big sobs. "Maybe… this is how it's supposed to be." A revelation dawned on her. They had been fighting for something had hadn't meant to be. They were fighting for something that was possibly impossible.

"You were right after all, Tomoyo. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I never listened to you. You warned me so many times. You've been such a great friend. I just didn't want to listen. I just thought… I just hoped… that maybe… maybe…" Sakura tried to control herself, but the tears just kept falling. Senseless words kept spilling out of her mouth between the sobs. "I just thought Syaoran was it… he was my only. But… I don't know. It's just not meant to be… and… and I'm so sorry Tomoyo-chan! You were right all along. You warned me… so many times. And after all this you were right! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Sakura wailed.

Tomoyo blinked, completely confused. Did Sakura just agree with her? "W-What?" Tomoyo sputtered.

"I really wish things were different. Just, different. But it's not… this is how it is. And I can't change it, no matter how much I want to. And I've finally come to realize that," Sakura whispered, her crying calming down a bit. This was it, this was final. So they really weren't meant to be after all.

Do you love a person more if let them go for the possibility they might be happier without you? Or do you love a person more when you keep them forever, knowing you can't imagine life without them?

And that was the question. And finally, Sakura thought she knew the answer. She loved Syaoran so much that she was able to finally let him go, even though she didn't know if he'd be happier with or without her. But it didn't so much matter anymore. What done was done, and he was gone.

The thought alone made her spasm into another fit of cries. He's gone. He's gone. He's gone. Sakura tried repeating it over and over in her mind, in hopes that her heart would bear with the fact and soon come to accept it. It was the only thing she had left. She loved him so much she was willing to let him go so he could be happy. It was the ultimate form of love, when you sacrificed your own happiness for the well being of the person you loved. It was when you placed their happiness above your own. And this was his decision, and Sakura had every intention of respecting that. If he wanted to leave and go marry some Chinese princess, then who was Sakura to object?

"Do you… love him?" Tomoyo questioned softly. And it was at that moment Tomoyo was just beginning to understand.

"Of course I love him… God, I do love him. I always have."

"No… Sakura. Do you love him?" The way Tomoyo emphasized the word made it sound more than it actually was. It made it sound more concrete, more unconditional. Did she really love Syaoran like that? Was she really so in love with him that she'd still do anything for him? Would she marry him?

Sakura clenched the ring tighter. She answered after awhile, and she knew that this response would never change. It could never change, because it was the truth. And no matter how much it hurt, the truth was absolute."… Yes, I do."

"Then what are you still doing here? Sakura… he's gone."

"He's gone…" Sakura murmured, almost as if she was repeating it to herself so she'd believe it. She couldn't believe it. She just could not believe he was gone. She forced out the words, "I guess there's nothing I can change about that…" Sakura trailed off, suddenly filled with dismal and lost hope. Her eyes began to water again. It was heartbreak all over again.

"Go after him, you idiot," Tomoyo whispered, smiling. It was then Sakura realized that Tomoyo had finally accepted him, despite everything that had happened, and would happen. Finally.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

There was a knock on the door. "Come in," Syaoran beckoned.

"Hey, little brother," she greeted with a smile. "Fuutie?" he questioned, cocking up one eyebrow. "Is everything okay?"

She nodded. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah… what?" he inquired. Fuutie didn't usually talk to him. Her lips were in a tight cool line, an expression she had learned off their mother perfectly. Her question shocked Syaoran. "What happened to Sakura? I liked her."

'You were about the only one besides me in this family.' He thought bitterly to himself. Syaoran shrugged, trying not to give anything away to his sister. "What about her?"

"Well… I don't know. You were fighting so hard for her… and now it seems like you've given up and are willing to do whatever Mother pleases. So what happened?" she inquired curiously. "I really have no intention of discussing what happened…especially with you, Fuutie," he responded coldly. The truth was Syaoran didn't want to be reminded of Sakura. He didn't even want to think of her, let alone talk about it. It just hurt too much for him to bear.

"I thought you loved her," Fuutie persisted, genuinely concerned. She really had liked Sakura, and was really looking forward to having her as a sister-in-law.

"It's a lot more complicated than you think. I… look, Fuutie. Forget about Sakura. She's gone now. I've forgotten about her, and that's that. There's nothing you can do about it, alright?" He forced out words, in attempt to convince his sister to let it go.

"I don't believe you," Fuutie told him stubbornly. "Don't believe what?" Syaoran questioned back incredulously. "That you've forgotten about her. You cannot honestly think that you can fool me to believe that you have simply forgotten about her in such a short period of time. A couple weeks ago she was all you could talk about; she was your entire world. You were trying everything to be with her. You said she was the only one you wanted to be with. And now you want me to pretend like she never even existed? Please, Syaoran. Give me some credit," she huffed.

Syaoran regarded his sister wistfully. "You're right… But it's no use. The reality of the situation is that I need to get married. Sakura wasn't ready for that, and I tried the best I could, but I couldn't push her. And besides, I love her way too much to ever force her to do something she wasn't ready for. So yeah, it sucks… it really does. But I don't see any other option left for me. So why make it hard on Mother when there's nothing I can do to change it? So please stop Fuutie… stop trying to fight for Sakura. I've tried, and it didn't work out. I would really appreciate it if we put it behind us now… and focus on the future."

She shook her head and perked up, "You can say no, you know. To Mother. You have a choice."

"I actually don't." He stared at her with serious amber eyes, "I don't have a choice."

"You always have a choice," she answered with a faint smile.

Syaoran ran his hands in his messy brown hair. He sighed. "My decision… my decision is to follow Mother's wishes. It didn't work out with Sakura, which tears my heart up inside. But there's really nothing I can do. I do not have a choice to choose from anymore. . ."

"But-" He cut her off. "I'm going to marry Minlang-san. That's my final decision."

"That's Mother's decision, not yours!" she exclaimed angrily.

"I said I would go through with this wedding. And I will, no matter what. I'm not going to let Mother down this time," he vowed.

"This isn't the first time…" Fuutie trailed off, realizing that her efforts would not change his mind any time soon.

"I will marry her," he said, more to himself than his sister. Syaoran was determined. There would be a marriage, absolutely. There had to be.

"Are you sure?" she asked in a quiet voice. Syaoran could tell that her hope had finally started to diminish.

His response was automatic – forced, robotic. "Of course."

"Are you happy?"

His eyes held her gaze. "That's not important anymore."

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Sakura felt giddy.

"The Li Mansion, please," she requested to the driver. She had a long flight, and even though Tomoyo had persisted she meet up with Eriol right away; she didn't want to waste any time. Sakura had come to China for one purpose, and the faster she got it over with, the more of a chance she had in succeeding.

"Ah, here for the Wedding?" The driver smiled at her through the mirror. "Yes," Sakura couldn't help but smile. Driving through the busy streets, Sakura couldn't enjoy the scenery. She had only one thought on her mind, and the task at hand burned through her veins. After what seemed like the longest car ride ever, Sakura recognized the familiar giant gateways of the Li Mansion. "Is anybody expecting you?" the driver questioned as they drove to the security.

"Um… my arrival was kind of… unexpected. Like a surprise…" she trailed off. Maybe she should have met up with Eriol after all. "Name?" he asked politely. She responded without thinking, "Kinomoto Sakura."

"I'm sorry Miss, you're denied entry because you're not on the guest list." Sakura's eyes bulged. She did not travel all this way just to be locked out of the house. "Please tell him that Hiiragizawa Eriol is expecting me." The driver nodded proceeding to tell the gate guard. "It will just be a few moments wait," the driver told her. She prayed with all her heart that she would be let in. She did not come this far only to be turned away.

Back inside the mansion, the word that perhaps Eriol's potential mistress has arrived and she's at the front gate. Fuutie frowned, at hearing at the maids' gossip.

"Eriol is expecting somebody…?" Fuutie murmured. She asked the maid, "Did you get a name?" The maid nodded, "Kinomoto Sakura."

Fuutie froze, "Sakura?" She started running towards the entrance of the mansion. "Let her immediately!"

Fuutie crashed into a certain blue-haired cousin of hers. He always seemed to appear when he was the least wanted. "Eriol!" she gasped, "Sakura! Why is Sakura here? You would know… wouldn't you? But anyway, Sakura is here! Right now!" she heaved; her eyes wide. Eriol shook his head, "No… that cannot be right. I was supposed to pick her up at the airport later on tonight…"

"Well she's outside the gates!" Fuutie exclaimed. "Is Syaoran here?" Eriol asked, still unusually calm. Fuutie shook her head. They rushed towards the main doors. "Mother cannot find out. She cannot know. She's going to be furious! Mother is going to be so mad at you. For disobeying her… oh she will not be happy at all!"

Eriol grinned. "She's not my mother."

"We cannot let Mother find out!" Fuutie said fiercely, thinking about all the consequences that would happen if her mother found out. Fanran appeared, "What is all the commotion about?"

Fuutie sprinted to the front doors, where she saw a certain brown-haired girl. Eriol shrugged at Fanran, following Fuutie with a quickening pace. Fanran frowned, as she too headed towards the main entrance. And then suddenly, she knew the reason behind all of the chaos. It was her.

Fanran knew instantly by the sparkling emerald eyes. They shone with determination, and Fanran knew exactly why. To stop the wedding.

A wave of panic shot through Fanran. Shiefa had warned her that this might happen, and as the two eldest sisters, it was their responsibility to stop it at all causes. Indeed, this was the girl who screwed up everything for their dear baby brother. Shiefa had a feeling that she'd show up and try to ruin the wedding. And now here she was, with her pretty smile and shining green eyes.

Fuutie looked back at her sister and realization dawned on her by the alarm in Fanran's eyes. Fuutie yelled, "Don't!" But it was too late. Fanran was already gone to go get Mother.

Sakura smiled at the both of them, totally oblivious to the situation. "Eriol! Fuutie!" she called. Fuutie smiled back weakly, resisting herself from running down the stairs to hug her. "I was supposed to pick you up later on," Eriol said, greeting Sakura with a tight smile. Tomoyo was so going to kill him.

"Yeah, but the flights left early… and I just, really… it was fine. I got here, didn't I?"

Eriol nodded, "Let's go to my place to get settled down then." Fuutie felt relief flood over her. Yes, hurry up and leave. That way, Mother wouldn't have a chance to knock her unconscious and ensure she was on a plane back to Japan herself.

"Kinomoto-san. We need to talk," surprisingly, the cool voice was not Yelan Li's. It was Shiefa's.

Sakura regarded her, puzzled.

"I'm sure Sakura has had a long flight. It's better if we go now… you can talk to her later," Eriol interjected. Shiefa shook her head. "What I need to say to her cannot wait."

Eriol swallowed nervously. Damn women and their perfected icy dagger looks.

And before she knew it, Sakura was swept into the nearest room to face Li Shiefa by herself.

"What are you doing here?"

Sakura blinked, still confused. What would Shiefa want to speak to her about? "I don't understand…" Sakura began. Shiefa cut her off sharply, "Don't try to pull that innocence act on me. I know why you're here; you want to stop the wedding… and I can't allow that."

Sakura took a double take of Shiefa. Her eyes widened.

"You've caused enough trouble for him already, and now you're here to destroy his wedding. Mother was right all along. No wonder why she insisted on an arranged wedding for my brother. It was to prevent him from marrying selfish unworthy girls just like you," Shiefa said with a venomous voice. Sakura flinched. Is that what the Li family thought of her all along? So all that hospitality for her birthday party was all just a façade… it was all fake. And they had only put on that show for her because they thought she'd be a temporary thing… Sakura wished she caught on earlier.

The old Sakura would have just sat there and took everything, probably crying all the while. Eventually, she'd be persuaded by Shiefa, and see the logic in Shiefa's arguments. In the end, she'd probably see that Shiefa was right and end up agreeing with her. But…Sakura wasn't like that anymore. She changed. And she was going to fight with everything she had for the things she believed in. "You don't know a thing about me," Sakura responded rather calmly.

"Nor do I care to, or waste my time to. All I know that you're here to ruin my brother's wedding. And I'm going to tell you straight up that I will not let that happen. Do you understand me?" Shiefa threatened. Sakura smiled, "Absolutely. But I will also tell you straight up that I'm not going to give him up so easily. You don't scare me… and I came here for a purpose. And I'm not going to let you discourage me. I made a decision, and I'm going to stick to it… no matter what you say."

Shiefa was enraged. She screamed at her, "He left you! He doesn't want you anymore! What part of that don't you understand?"

"You don't know anything about my relationship!" Sakura yelled back, feeling her anger swirl up inside of her. How dare she say something like that! She didn't know even half of the facts.

"I don't need to. In the end, he left you. That's all that matters. He chose to get married. And whatever your little plans are to ruin his wedding… it's not going to work," Shiefa warned menacingly.

"I don't want that! I just want to talk to him…" Sakura trailed off.

"And try to talk him out of it? You're being selfish. Do you ever think of him for once?" she demanded. Sakura's eyes narrowed. She didn't have to answer to her. It was then she realized that Shiefa was desperate. The naked panic in her eyes gave her away. She was scared of Sakura. And there was only one reason why she'd be scared of Sakura… and that was if she could convince Syaoran to break off the wedding. Shiefa probably knew that Sakura could pull it off… that Sakura could ask Syaoran to stop the wedding… and just like that, the wedding would be no more.

"Don't ruin it for him," Shiefa mumbled, picking up that it had dawned on Sakura that she had the power to call off the wedding. "This is what Syaoran wants. I know he does. He chose it. He didn't choose you…Please, just go home. You'll just ruin everything for him now. And he doesn't want that. He doesn't want to see you. The wedding is what he wants," she told her pleadingly.

"Then let him tell me that himself," Sakura retorted, knowing it was she that had the power to do whatever she wanted.

"Don't you see that he belongs here?" There was a mix of frustration and exasperation in Shiefa's voice.

Sakura froze. Her thoughts automatically slipped back to his place back in Japan. She was able to pinpoint the cold bare feeling of his room in his apartment so easily. Suddenly, she remembered all his distraught, empty looks out of the window. He looked so sad, so out of place… so homesick.

"If you really love him… you'll let him go. This is the best for him," Shiefa continued in a soft murmur, "Don't you want what's best for him?"

Finally, Sakura relented. She saw what Shiefa was trying to tell her. Maybe he was better off here… even if that mean being without her.

"Yes," she whispered. She understood that sometimes true love really meant letting go when you wanted to hang on tighter. That was the other side of one of her internal debates with herself long ago. Sakura thought to herself quietly, feeling a pang in her heart. I guess I was wrong. Letting go is stronger.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

"Syaoran…"

He jerked around to see his sister. "What are you doing here? I didn't say you could come in, Fuutie. Who even let you in?"

She ignored him. "How are you?"

Syaoran sighed. "What do you want?"

Fuutie smiled faintly, "I came to give you a warning. Well… it's not really a warning, but it's something I think you'd want to hear. Mother wasn't going to tell you, but I think you have a right to know."

"What is it?" he asked tiredly. Her voice was a quiet whisper, "…She's here."

"Who?"

Her name alone caused a burst of fireworks in his heart. "Sakura."

He sputtered, "W-What do you mean… she's here?" Fuutie nodded, "She's here… Don't tell anybody I told you this… but… she came to the mansion the other day. I doubted that she was just here for the wedding. I think she wants to talk to you…. Will you see her?"

Syaoran groaned, running his hands through his hair. Sakura was here? Really? That made everything that much more complicated… "To be honest with you… I probably won't," he replied in a clipped voice. "Why?" Fuutie demanded, stunned. "Why do you think you're here at Minlang-san's? It's not just for pre-wedding purposes… it's too keep you away from Sakura."

"Well… maybe that's the right thing to do."

"Syaoran!" she cried in a scolding tone.

"Look… I don't expect you to full understand. It is probably really better off if I do not see Sakura. I mean… look at you. You were in an arranged marriage, and you turned out just fine... The truth is…if I saw Sakura now it would just ruin everything. And this time around, I cannot afford to screw up," he paused, catching Fuutie's gaze, "I've called off this wedding too many times already. With it being in less than a week away… seeing Sakura would be disastrous. I cannot afford to post-pone this wedding any longer, and I really want it to be done and over with."

"Weddings shouldn't be something you just want to get it 'done and over with'," she protested.

"This isn't an average wedding. This is an arranged marriage. You're in one… don't you remember how it was?" he questioned, desperately wishing she would understand and drop the whole matter. But she didn't, and she was so stubborn to give up. "I looked forward to my wedding. It was exciting… I finally felt I could be useful in some way. And my husband was handsome, kind, rich… what more could a girl ask for? Of course I was ecstatic to marry him. But I didn't love him, at least not then. But that didn't even matter to me… I knew it would look good that I married him, so I did…" she explained to him, reminiscing.

"You turned out just fine, and so will I with my fiancée. Aren't you happy with your husband?"

She shrugged. "He gives me a good life; I cannot complain."

"Exactly. I'll come to love Mei Ling in time… everything will be okay. It doesn't matter anymore. Mother wants this, so the least I can do is give this to her. She's handing over the whole company to me – I should be grateful. Your marriage is fine… and so will mine," he said determinedly.

"I like Sakura better than Minlang-san. Besides, you cannot compare my situation. I was excited for my marriage… There's a difference between you and me. I wasn't in love with somebody else at the time!" she exclaimed passionately. "What difference does it make?" Syaoran scoffed.

"You're going to regret it. I can guarantee you right now that you will. You don't want to do this, Syaoran. You don't want to marry her. You're dooming yourself… you're making yourself suffer unnecessarily. And I can't just stand around while you make the greatest mistake of your life! There's a distinct line between your family responsibilities, and your responsibilities to yourself. Can't you see? Mother has crossed it a long time ago… you can't let her win. She doesn't control you. She doesn't own you. You live your own life, and you should make your own decisions!" Fuutie advised him, trying to encourage him that being with Sakura was the right thing to do. Fuutie wanted him to know that he shouldn't be letting Mother walk all over him.

Syaoran didn't say anything to her, his mouth in a grim line as he listened to her scold him. "She wants you to suffer on Father's behalf. Isn't it obvious?"

Syaoran's eyes widened – he was horrified. He could not believe his sister had just said that. His father? What did that have anything to do with it? Fuutie continued, "She saw the joy Sakura brought you. It was the same look and expression as Father once gave her."

Syaoran regarded his sister with a shocked expression. But she just kept going, lecturing him, "You come first. You come before the family company. I've watched you… ever since we were little. And you were always giving something up for somebody else. It's about time you thought about yourself. It's about time you stood your ground and said no."

Finally, Syaoran blurted out, "But you were in an arranged marriage. And you have a good life! I don't see how marrying Minlang is such a bad horrible thing. I'll be okay. I'll have a good life with my fiancée."

"My life isn't really something to strive for…" she trailed off, "Don't you get it?"

Syaoran didn't reply. "I didn't have a choice… I thought that nothing better would come along. So I seized my opportunity while I could. You're different Syaoran. You love Sakura; anybody can tell that you do. My advice to you now is to disobey Mother for once. For once in your life just live… and do what you want to do. Don't worry about the consequences… you'll be absolutely fine anyway you go. I know you will. Please, I just don't want to see you regret not fighting for Sakura. I want you to be happy, Syaoran. So I'm telling you this, and hoping so hard with all of my heart that you will see some logic and come to your senses. Don't settle. Don't sacrifice yourself. Do not settle," she warned menacing.

"I'm not settling," he denied. "Yes!" she cried, "Yes you are! But why? I just don't understand how you can go through with this…. Why settle for a mediocre love when you can have an amazing one?"

Syaoran sighed wistfully.

"I didn't know any better, and I do regret it. But there's nothing I can do about it now… but you… you CAN," she encouraged, "You always tried to please her… ever since we were little. There's only so much you can do. There's going to have to be a point in your life where you tell her no. Where you finally grow up and realize that your mother can't run your life for you. Don't you see? She'll always want more. It'll never stop… somewhere deep inside you… you know that's true."

"What's the use? I can't go against her. It's Mother, you know how she is!" he argued. "So what?" she yelled back. "But I've tried! And I failed. So can we just drop this all now? I've listened to your point…but there's really nothing I can do about it, okay? Let's put all this behind us now… and focus on the task ahead of us, please," he begged, desperate to make Fuutie see that all his attempts were futile.

Fuutie frowned, "I just… I just don't understand why you want to please her so badly. It isn't what you want, yet you still go through with it… why? When will you just stop being so stupid? When will you finally wake up and break off this arranged marriage once and for all? I know it's what you want more than anything."

"Because… she wants a wedding," he declared solemnly.

"She wants you to be just as miserable as she is," Fuutie told him, equally as serious. Their eyes met, both of them desperate to make the other see their respectful side of the situation.

"I think you're making a grave mistake, little brother."

"And I think you should mind your own damn business and get out of my life," he retorted back.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Finally after getting the last of his things packed, Syaoran was ready for his flight with Sakura back to Japan. He was heading towards the door with his carry on when a voice from behind stopped him. "Xiao Lang, I would like a word with you before you depart."

He turned around to face his mother, poised as always. "What is it, Mother?" he asked, not having any intention of having an hour long conversation, in which he would miss his flight.

In a distance he could hear Fuutie gush, "Sakura-chan, you have to come back and visit very soon! I'll miss you so much!" He turned back his head, and caught Sakura's gaze at him. She nodded at him as Fuutie hugged her affectionately.

"A word in private," she replied. "I don't have that much time, Mother," he protested, "Sakura is waiting."

Yelan said nothing as she walked into her study room. Syaoran knew well enough to follow her without question. She sat down at her desk; Syaoran stared at her challengingly. "It's about Kinomoto-san," she admitted.

"What about her?" he snarled, without really meaning to be harsh. It was crystal clear that his mother did not approve of Sakura. This displeased him greatly, seeing as his mother did not really have any concrete reason to dislike Sakura. Though she had made it blunt that Sakura was not welcome in her household, she was not down right mean to Sakura's face.

"I think it is time for you to discontinue the relationship. I let this go on for this long because I thought it would come to an end by itself. But, I see that you are very serious about her, and it does not look like it will stop on its own terms. Hereby, I must come forth for your own benefit. I cannot allow this to get any further; it will only end in disaster," his mother stated, very formally and business like.

"You don't have any business in who I'm involved with outside the company," he sneered, clearly offended. "I'm trying to save you the trouble and look after you. I must insist that my son should marry somebody of higher status. After all, you are my son, and you should not settle for anything less than what you deserve," she answered in return, cool and calm as ever.

"And how do you know that Sakura isn't deserving of me? Or that I even deserve her?" Syaoran demanded, furious his mother could even say such a thing to him. "You cannot tell me what to do anymore, Mother."

"That may be so, however, I strongly suggest you cease this relationship immediately. Soon, this company will be yours. A lot of girls would be more than happy to run it to the ground. I refuse to let you ruin me, Xiao Lang… do you understand?" Her eyes were ice cold.

"Sakura isn't like that. If you only took the chance to get to know her you'd know that for yourself," he resorted, even though he knew it was hopeless to try to argue against her.

She ignored him. "Don't disappoint me, son."

It was no use. You could not change Li Yelan's mind at all once she implemented it. And if she thought that Sakura would not make a fitting bride for him, then there was nothing he could do about it. It was useless to try to argue about it. She made up her mind already. It would just be a huge waste of time if Syaoran tried to fight against her. He turned around abruptly.

"Goodbye, Mother," he gritted, slamming the door behind him. He rushed down the stairs and Sakura looked at him curiously. "What was that about?" Sakura questioned, intertwining their hands. Syaoran forced a smile, "Nothing. She just told me that it was a pleasure to meet you," he lied smoothly. Trying not to reveal his anger, he squeezed her hand. Sakura brightened. "Really? I got the impression she didn't like me all that much."

"Non-sense. What's there not to like?"

"Oh Syaoran! You look so handsome; I never thought this day would come!" Feimei exclaimed, gleaming with excitement. Syaoran's concentration broke; he automatically forced a thin smile. "I know, our little brother… finally settling down… I don't believe it either," Fanran laughed. Shiefa gave him an approving nod.

"I don't even get to get a break from all of you for a day…" he shook his head, sighing. He glanced up at his three sisters… wait… three? "Where is Fuutie?" he questioned, beginning to get suspicious. What was she up to now? He hoped she wouldn't do anything to mess this up for him. He really thought he got his message to her, but he never really knew if he did or not. He could only hope.

Shiefa noticed his tension. "She's at back at the house, doing some last minute things… I've kept her preoccupied… she should be here momentarily." It was Shiefa's way of saying 'I've kept her busy so she will not screw this wedding up'. Syaoran nodded understandingly. "Eriol also has been engaged in important last minute wedding arrangements," she added.

So this was it. Today was the day. Today was his wedding day… the long awaited day he had been painfully waiting for… this was it.

Today… he would get married. He would throw away all his thoughts of Sakura away. He would bury his love for Sakura somewhere deep inside of himself. Somewhere he could never dig up ever again for the rest of his life. He would push down all his feelings for Sakura to a place where he could never reach them. From this day on, there was no Sakura.

So today was it. Today was the day.

And nothing could go wrong.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Sakura pounded on the giant front doors of the Li Mansion with her fists. Please, please, let somebody be there.

To her surprise, Fuutie opened the door. "Sakura-chan!" she exclaimed in delight.

Sakura, who was breathing heavily, gave out a sigh of relief. "I need to talk to Syaoran. Immediately. It's urgent."

Fuutie did a double take of Sakura, she swallowed nervously. "Syaoran's not here. I'm sorry, Sakura-chan… He's already… at the… I think it's too late."

Sakura shook her head frantically. "I have to try."

Fuutie regarded Sakura sadly. As much as she wanted Sakura and her brother to be together – it just seemed to be impossible. "Please, I have to try," Sakura pleaded. Fuutie started, "There's going to be a private ceremony…"

"Where?" Sakura demanded.

"The Li Garden Park… I can take you there. I'm going there now. I just had some last minute house duties… but Sakura… I can only get you there… but there isn't much more I can do. I've tried, and he's not relenting at all… I think it's too late," Fuutie spoke softly. "Thank you… but I didn't come all this way for nothing. I didn't come this far just to give up. I'm giving this as my last shot… if this doesn't work – then nothing will," Sakura replied gravely.

There were problems getting in the Garden Park.

"She's with me. Let her in!" Fuutie glared at one of the security officers. "I'm sorry, I have strict orders not to permit Kinomoto-san into the premise," the big sturdy officer said stiffly.

"She's with me. She's my guest. Are you going to disobey my orders to allow her into the premise?" Fuutie demanded. Sakura looked at the officer pleadingly, "I won't cause any trouble. I just want to support him in his celebration…"

The officer sighed. Either way he was going to let somebody down. "I don't believe you mean that, Kinomoto-san. However, regardless, good luck."

Sakura and Fuutie grinned. "Thank you!" They rushed to the center of the garden where the ceremony was being held. Sakura prayed with all her heart that she wasn't too late.

Please let it not be too late.

…

"You ready?"

Syaoran snorted. "As about ready as I'll ever be."

Eriol grinned, "I can't believe this is actually finally happening. It's hard to fathom. I mean…"

"Don't say it. Don't say it," Syaoran warned menacingly. "Well," Eriol shook his head, "I support you in whatever you decide. Even if my own girlfriend cuts my head off when I get back home… You are a brother to me."

"Thank you… but… I know your input on the situation… and this is what I want. Despite what you think, I want this. I want this wedding to happen more than anything," Syaoran spoke slowly, trying hard to be truthful. He looked at all the close family and friends gathered. They were chatting idly waiting for the bride to make her grand entrance, sitting in fancy white lawn chairs in straight orderly rows. Syaoran and Eriol were at the front, with the minister. It was a rather simple wedding ceremony for the Li Family – but it got the job done. The purpose was to bind the Li and Minlang families together, and that it would do.

"This isn't about me. This isn't about me, anymore," Syaoran said roughly. "This is my sacrifice. This is about being a good son… the golden son. This is about finally making her proud. I finally did something right."

"At the cost at your own happiness," Eriol scoffed.

Syaoran looked at his best man sadly, "Some things are inevitable."

Eriol was going to come back with a retort when the crowd fell silent. He shut his mouth. The bride was approaching. People were watching her gracefully come closer. Her lovely white gown and bridesmaids could be seen from a distance. Syaoran swallowed, "This is it." He tensed thinking about the events to follow. He would go through with this. This wedding would happen, no matter what.

"LI SYAORAN!"

And then suddenly all his worries and fears vanished – disintegrated. It was her voice, it was her. Sakura.

"SYAORAN!" She screamed, running with Fuutie from the opposite direction of the bride. Sakura had on a simple pink blouse and casual white capris. She was running, her hair flowing with the wind, her voice carrying his name. And even in her casual attire, Sakura was still more stunningly beautiful than his own bride. His breath got caught by the mere sight of her, and his heart started to flip enthusiastically. This was the girl he truly loved… and probably would only ever love.

Her pace slowed, her breaths uneven. She walked down the center aisle – all eyes upon her.

"Syaoran…" She looked at him, still as handsome as ever.

Her name came out a whisper. He was still in shock about her presence here. He stumbled. "Sakura…"

The crowd was all watching intently, the bride and her minions storming towards them. Fuutie glared at the bride, "Don't you dare interrupt them – or I swear to God I'll make your life with him a living nightmare that you wished you never agreed to this arrangement in the first place," she threatened. The bride opened her mouth to rebut when Eriol magically appeared. "Don't mess with my cousin, bitch."

Syaoran's eyes widened. Sakura… Sakura was here. Sakura.

He tried so hard to forget her. So hard to push down all his affections for her. Tried to forget he had ever met her. That he had ever loved her. He tried so hard to make himself believe she never even existed.

She smiled weakly. "You look amazing."

"Nothing compared to you." The compliment was natural; he was so use to showering her with affection that it came instinctively.

Her smile grew. "Sorry for crashing your wedding."

He tensed. "Why are you here, Sakura?"

She looked at him, not quite sure how to begin. She swallowed, "Because I love you."

Syaoran half-heartedly chuckled. Now she says she loves him… after all the other times he tried to convince her to just let him back in… she chooses his wedding day to admit what he's known all along. That she loves him. He just couldn't believe this was happening.

"I love you, Syaoran. I do. I always have, I just… was so scared to let you back in because I was afraid you'd hurt me again. I couldn't go through that again… that heartbreak. It was excruciating, and there's only so much I can take… but when you… tried to… when you begged for my forgiveness… I never really thought about… I never thought there would be a time where you wouldn't be there!" she exclaimed.

"Sakura…"

"These past weeks have been really crazy. Not only for you, but for me as well. I've been thinking a lot… and I've come to the conclusion that I can't… not love you. It's too hard to think about… you not in my life. I don't want that. I'm sorry I took a long time to figure that out… but I love you. And I don't want to be selfish, really… I don't. But I tried imagining my life without you… and it's all meaningless. It's all pointless without you. I have always loved you, and I tried so hard to deny that. But I'm done denying it… I'm done with lying to myself… to you… to everybody. And as selfish as it is, I need you." Her eyes met his.

Syaoran sighed.

"I need you because I love you."

He opened his mouth to say something, but she shook her head. "Please, let me finish," she paused.

"You are a part of me. Without you… I fall apart." Her eyes began to tear.

"I tried putting the broken pieces back together. But nothing worked… it was only until I realized that I was trying to put something back together that lacked a crucial piece. I was trying to put myself together only for it to be useless because you are a part of me. Without all the pieces, I'm not whole."

"Sakura…"

"I'd be honoured to marry you, Li Syaoran."

Syaoran felt his heart stop momentarily. No. She didn't just say that… but she did. And really… it should have changed everything. It did change everything. But it was so hard to process, so difficult for Syaoran to back down now… even though it was everything he had ever wanted. To be with Sakura forever. Yet why didn't he jump at that chance and leave all the family drama behind?

Syaoran knew in his heart what he wanted – who he wanted. But none of that mattered now… he made his decision before, and as much as Sakura meant to him, he wasn't going to screw it up. Not now… he couldn't now. He looked towards his mother briefly, her expression ice cold. He couldn't let her down… he just couldn't. He said softly, "I wish you said yes earlier."

Her reply was automatic. "I wish I did too."

Syaoran ran his fingers through his hair and sighed again. He knew exactly what he had to do. And he was fighting with everything he could inside of him to make that happen… even if that meant losing Sakura forever. He had to do what he had to do… even if it killed him inside.

"Is it too late?" she whispered.

Syaoran looked at his bride, at his emotionless mother, then back to Sakura. This was it – this was the moment of his life.

"You left me… did you really think you'd be able to get away with that?" Sakura asked, sensing that she wasn't exactly convincing him to ditch the wedding. She saw the strain in his eyes, the hurt in his expression. She knew that it wouldn't be easy… not for her or for him. And in that moment looking at him in his distress… maybe he really was better off without her. But she still had to try. She still had to try to fight a losing battle.

"Yes… No… Maybe… I don't know. I really don't. It was all just… a spur of the moment decision. I didn't really know what to do. I thought maybe that was the best solution… at the time," he got out.

"I… love…you. Nothing else matters. I love you, Syaoran. I love you." She moved closer to him.

"You have no idea how much I love you," he cracked a sad smile. And it was then he knew what he was going to do. And if he waited a second longer, even just the slightest moment longer, he knew he would have ruined the whole thing. But as hard as it was, to face Sakura and his entire family…He knew if he waited that extra second he would have been the happiest man alive. But somehow, someway that Syaoran himself didn't even comprehend… he didn't choose his happiness.

He didn't choose her.

"I'm sorry, Sakura. But I can't," he said.

And with those words Sakura knew it was over. It was all over. It was the same words she told him when he asked her to marry her. I can't. Those two little words that caused her whole world to crumble.

He made his decision, and that was it – she failed. She looked him over one last time, the hurt in her heart starting to swell up, trying to overwhelm her. She couldn't believe he rejected her. That he chose his family and duty over her. It… was unbelievable. "I… respect your decision…I just… thought it…. I just want you happy, Syaoran. And if I can't then….If I can't make you happy…" She choked out words.

Syaoran saw how crushed she looked and it hurt his heart more than he could ever imagine to see her like that. But he chose… he chose to stick to the decision he made before. "You make me the happiest, Sakura," he whispered. She didn't say anything, only looked at him with raw disappointment and sadness.

"Sakura, wait."

She shook her head, "Don't." She turned around and started to walk away. Water welled up into her disheartened eyes.

She looked behind her, over her shoulder and gazed into his distressed amber eyes, "I love you." I always will, forever. She believed it to always be true.

She touched the promise ring around her neck, twirled it around her fingers. She could not let it get to her. She would not let it get to her. She would not allow him to break her again. Tears streamed down her cheeks. It was just yet another broken promise of his.

He whispered the words as she walked away. "I love you too, Sakura."

"I wish we could be together."

Her voice and her face flashed into his head as he watched her walk out of his life. This time it was for good. His heart desperately screamed at him to go run after her. Go, go, go! But he couldn't. Maybe he wasn't the one who would chase after her, maybe he wasn't the one who could make her happy. Because if he was, they would have been together. They would have made it through anything and everything. Now Syaoran would never know. Maybe they would have made it, maybe they wouldn't have. He was just so sure that she was everything he had ever wanted, and more. He was certain that Kinomoto Sakura was the One. That he could love no other the way he loved her. But for the first time in his life he considered the very opposite. Maybe he wasn't the one for her. Maybe… he was wrong.

"Why wish when you can make it come true?"

Maybe they just weren't meant to be, no matter how hard they both wished.

She replied quietly, fighting back her tears, "Because broken wishes never come true."

So I finally got around to finish this story. I just needed to write a bit of the last ending scene and I just couldn't find the inspiration to do so... well, that is until today. It's ironic how I want to write for myself, but end up just writing because of the hurt this guy caused. And no matter how much he hurt me, I still love him and would do anything to make him happy. So this one is for you, FG.

You still have my heart, and I don't think I want it back.

°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°°.•¤¤•.°

Well, I hoped you enjoyed it; I really like it.

There is a last installment to this but I really don't think I'll ever get around to finishing it. But we'll see.

Thanks for reading!

I'll leave you with a quote my friend told me today. "Its ironic how we ignore those who want us, want those who ignore us, love those who hurt us, and hurt those who love us."

-Aliaandraa.