10 THINGS YOU COULD NEVER THINK

Roxanne Weasley

1) It is a well know fact that the first little word out that tiny tan toddler's mouth was "firework". Well, it was more like "fi-wok," due to a toddler's inability to talk properly without inducing hilarity, but heck, it was close enough.

2) She liked to sing. Not the dainty stuff like hymns and whatnot, no, the good stuff, the sort that people of an older generation would call "screaming and shouting to music," or Rock-and-Roll to you and me. Yeah, the good old-fashioned muggle stuff suited Roxanne better than glasses on her Uncle Harry.

3) She was, no matter how much people scowled and shook their head in disappointment, urging her to do better, inseparable from Dominique. She knew all her dirty secrets (bar one special secret, which if Roxanne had known, the contents of Chapter One to Three would be drastically altered), and Dominique all hers. Hip by hip, arms linked, one a silent ear while the other blabbered on, swapping places when necessary. The only thing that separated them was Quiddich and parental genes.

4) Fire fascinated her. The way it seemed to dance in it's hypnotising glow, how it was truly untameable, but used so often one would think it's users had a death wish. One tiny spark, a single, tiny, flash of orange could burn and destroy so much in so little time. Beautiful, yet so unbelievably deadly, it was her pure untainted bliss.

5) She was unnaturally poetic, for someone who would spend her time singing along to old muggle records (and giving her family headaches in process). Or at least if we are to believe the stereotype, or even just follow her personality: loud, proud, spiteful, and bungee jumping off the line between sanity and the alternative (although, with the last one, it wasn't so surprising). Everything, literally everything, had some sort strange symbolic meaning. Like whenever Roxanne went on a murderous rampage, it represented her love of fire, or something like that. Most people just thought it was because she was mad.

6) She couldn't help but notice, well really, everyone noticed, Dominique's change. "It's a phase," she told herself, "she'll be fine, back to her normal self by October." But she didn't revert back into that sweet little girl, who said please and thank you, and always blushed at the slightest hint of a compliment. No, she was bitter, sarcastic, and colder than dry ice. But devoted, to her only friend, and to be honest, that's the only thing that didn't stop her having a mental break down about the stability of her friend. And it really, really didn't help when she kept muttering about "making her pay!"

7) She sympathised with Lucy, poor kid. Roxanne was in a similar situation, recently discovering she'll be looking like she'd swallowed a planet in several months. Lucy, however, had been literally thrown out, while Roxanne still had a roof over her head (although her father had threatened to show Ricky his collection of `sharp-pointy-things-that-could-kill-you'). Roxanne had offered to let her stay, but Lucy had already made arrangements with 'Looney' Luna to stay till 'Sander managed to get his finances in check. As much as she loved her, Roxanne thought staying with a bunch sanity lacking lunatics wasn't exactly a child-friendly environment…

8) She's never really believed in marriage. In fact, to her it's basically just another excuse to dress up in nice white frilly-frilly-puffy dresses for a day, get drunk and have an excuse to get some hanky-panky over and done with, which if you think about it, you can do at your local nightclub, except at a night club you don't have to wait ten goddamned minutes to strut your stuff. Besides, the majority of the time you're already living together, so there is. No. Bloody. Point!

9) She blacked out when she found out about Dom. It was probably for the best, too. She woke up, dried tears and blood staining her face and pillow - no, cushion…this was a sofa - to the sound of her parents, brother, Ricky, and probably the rest of her relatives in a whispered argument about something she just could not remember. It seemed like the worst kind of hell.

10) On her 23rd birthday, Roxanne had invested all her money in some backstage VIP tickets for a muggle band she had been interested in. Cost a bloody fortune considering the venue, honestly. So, two weeks later, there she was, squealing like on overgrown schoolgirl as she watched Kallum, Tammy, Liam and ohmygod Chris walk onto the stage as she watched behind the curtain, almost popping from excitement, and just as Tammy pressed activated the effects, and large and horrifying BANG! racketed through the building, in a large and terrifying mass of amber.

And so, on the 9th September, 2026, Roxanne Weasley learned the meaning of a very dramatic and poetic word, called irony.

AN: OH MY GOD GUYS! I LIKE, UPDATED FOR ONCE! I'M NOT DEAD! I'S A DAMN REVALATION!

Ahem. So...yeah, sorry about the massive wait. It's been, like, a year or sumat. Umm...hi?

I, uh, have no explanation other than I'm really lazy.

Don't eat me. I'll update quicker that way *shot*

Reveiws make me happy, and they make me less lazy.

(Please don't eat me)