This one was a quickie! I can't really give a good summary without giving anything away... the title really speaks for itself. Rated T for Kuro-language. Enjoy!

Kurogane POV

"Open this door, idiot!" I screamed as I knocked against the closet door.

"I'm not letting my Kuro-angry out of there until he gives me what I want!" my captor replied through the door he had obviously barricaded. "Kuro-puu knows exactly what I want."

"Let me out of here right now or when I get out myself, I'll bash your teeth in!"

"Aww, but Kuro-myuu! Without my teeth, I won't be able to eat! …Or bite you."

I growled. I did enjoy the biting. But this was no way for him to get what he wanted from me.

"Let me out of this closet right now!"

"Why should I?"

"I have to use the bathroom!"

"Oh no, I'm not falling for that one again, Kuro-tricky! I'll be back in a little bit to see if you've changed your mind about what I said."

"Oh, no you don't!" I yelled.

I heard his light, graceful footsteps prance out of the room and stop for a few seconds as he shut the door to the bedroom, and left the door to the closet inside the bedroom blockaded.

I spent about two full minutes banging on the door as hard as I could without breaking it. I didn't have the money to be paying for stupid things like door replacements.

"Dammit, Fai, let me out of here!" I shouted.

"This is no way to get what you want, you idiot!" I called.

"If you don't let me out, it's your fault if I piss in your closet!" I warned.

"If I'm not out of this room in the next five seconds, I swear I'll kill you!" I threatened.

It was no good. He had trapped me in his closet, and I wasn't getting out until he let me.

That bastard….

I decided to distract myself with some reading while I was confined. I flicked on the light and looked for a book. I selected the one on the top of the stack on the ground, sat, opened the leather covers to a random page without even reading the title, and began to read. It was handwritten.

April 7 - 11:39 AM

It is one of the most beautiful days of the year so far, and I suggested that Kuro-puu and I go out for a picnic in a few hours. It only took a little bit of convincing to get him to say yes. I'm finished making all the picnic foods now, and we're about to go! I've got a plan for our little trip… it's going to be so much fun and everything is going to be perfect!

I remember that day… oh, there's more.

April 7 - 8:16 PM

The whole day was full of fun! We choose a beautiful spot on a hill near a lake and we sat and talked while we ate. It wasn't too hot, nor too cold. The ants tried to get into our picnic basket, but Kuro-puu kept them away. He even admitted my sandwiches were yummy! After we ate, we sat on the rocks by the lake and kicked our feet in the water. It was very peaceful and very relaxing.

I am a little bit disappointed, however. While the day went wonderfully, there was one minor detail I would have liked to change. Kuro-puu was getting crankier as the day went on because he said he wanted to go home right after we ate to finish some business. Sometimes I wish he would lighten up and live a little. With me.

Yeah, I was getting cranky! That idiot wouldn't come home after I told him I needed to get some work done!

April 9 - 2:46 AM

I can't sleep. I keep having this nightmare that Kuro-puu left the house and wouldn't come home. This would be the third time I've woken up in five hours. I've actually snuck a peek in his room every time I've woken up just to make sure it was just a dream.…

Half of me knows he would never just up and leave with no explanation, but the other half of me thinks that he might get tired of me one day and leave for that reason. I know I annoy the poo out of him; anyone with half a brain knows that. But that's not something I can help. It's just the way I am. It's just how I show my affection toward him. I'm not sure if he gets that or not.

Well, I think it's time for me to try and go back to sleep. I have to get up early tomorrow.

I didn't know he thought that…. Why the hell would I leave him? Sure, he does get on my nerves sometimes, like right now… but I'd never just leave him alone here.

I turned the page. I didn't realize that I was, in fact, invading Fai's privacy by reading these entries. I kept reading, fidgeting every few minutes from having to use the bathroom.

April 9 - 4:01 PM

It's the middle of Mrs. Kennedy's lecture and after all of my nightmares, I can barely pay attention, so I thought I might as well do something productive.

In the hall on the way here, Kuro and I were talking about what's for dinner tonight. He doesn't want to spend any money, even though I insisted we finally go out for a romantic dinner, so I told him I would cook him spaghetti, a dish from home. He said in his big, tough guy voice, "As long as you make something you know I like too" so I asked if he liked my cooking. He admitted my food was "decent". Coming from him, that's like a five star chef calling your food "brilliant". Right? Oh, I don't know. I hope. I gave him a kiss on the cheek anyway. He blushed. :3 I giggled.

That idiot knows I like his food! Why is he acting like I don't? And I didn't know I blushed… at least not so apparently…. I need to stop that.

April 13 - 6:19 PM

I've been swamped with homework, but I waned to take a little time out to write out my plan for this Saturday, which will be Kuro and I's half year anniversary. I don't know how many times I've told him it was coming up and how many times he said he refuses to celebrate it. Apparently, it's "unimportant". Many things that are "unimportant" to him matter to me. And I'm getting a little beat up inside every time he shoots my love down. Speaking of love, that is what I want

Huh, I guess he had to stop writing there. What a convenient spot.

I know I yell at the guy sometimes, but I don't mean to beat him down…. He's very irritating. But I didn't know what my constant yelling was doing to the guy…. It doesn't seem to affect him. He keeps on smiling.

I had now realized that I was turning the pages of Fai's private thoughts, but now I couldn't help myself. I had to keep reading more.

I gasped. On these pages, some of the ink looked runny from water. Or tears?

April 18 - 1:17 AM

I tried my absolute hardest to make him happy tonight, but nothing worked! It was a disaster as far as I'm concerned! I had the whole night planned out so that things would go nicely for both of us. Nothing went wrong, but Kuro-whiny was complaining the entire time whenever he was dissatisfied with something. I even let him pick a Japanese style restaurant, but he started swearing to himself when they didn't cook the food right in front of him because we were too far away to see. He kept pestering me to hurry up and order, even after I explained to him that I rarely ate Japanese food and needed some time to read the menu. I don't know what that was all about. Why was he so anxious to leave? I dunno… but it gets worse.

When we got to the movies, he wouldn't let me get any snacks except for a drink for some reason. Once we sat down, he didn't put his arm around me or any of that cute stuff like I expected him to do. I tried snuggling up with him, but he didn't really respond. When I tried to tell him I was cold, he shushed me instead of offering me his jacket. Half-way into the movie, when people in the movie started dying, he finally decided to put his arm around me. I was so happy, I kissed him on the cheek.

Once the movie was over, I dragged him to the beach for a moonlit walk. I grabbed his hand, but I was the one who had to situate each finger between the others. He seemed to be really bored, so I cut the walk short. But not before I twirled around to stand in front of him with wide eyes, standing on tiptoe, to kiss him. It was short-lived. He kissed me back, but his actions weren't hungry for more. Secretly, I'd had a beach sex fantasy. I knew it wouldn't happen. But I never imagined so little, either.

"I love you," I told him.

"Yeah," he said.

Though this is our half-year mark, there have been, in my opinion, few kisses. I don't get one every day. I also don't get another little thing every day that I've been trying to get ever since I first gave it to him. It still hasn't been returned. Maybe I'm impatient, maybe I'm overreacting, but one thing I know for sure is that I did all I could to make him happy and he just disregarded all of it with that stupid attitude of his! I might annoy the crap out of that guy, but it can't possibly compare to how hurt I am right now!

Why should I even try anymore? I've done just about all I can, it seems…. Obviously he doesn't want me around. Obviously my efforts are futile. Obviously he doesn't love me…. Maybe I should just go. It'd hurt less for me to leave him, rather than him leaving me, I think. He wouldn't care. He doesn't care. I doubt he ever cared. He never cared enough to give me a simple three words to confirm that our relationship was, indeed, serious. And I doubt he ever will. I don't want to give up. I'll try again in a few days… I've got a mischievous plan involving my closet up my sleeve…. If that doesn't work though, I might just have to give up completely. Now that I think about it more, I don't think I could ever bring myself to pack my bags and leave him. Death would be a lot less painful. I don't know. I'll cross then bridge when if we come to it.

That was the last entry. I leaned back so my head collided with the door. What was wrong with me?

I thought back to that day, April 17, which was our six month anniversary. I thought back even further to the previous April 17. The day both of my parents died. The day I cursed. The day I wished I could erase from time so that it never happened. I never spoke of it, not even to Fai, which is why he didn't know not to celebrate that wretched day. Though, because I never spoke of it, I couldn't expect Fai to know why I was so upset all day. I guess it's… I don't know. Maybe it's because of what happened on April 16, the last full day my father was alive.

He told me: "If anything were to happen to your mother and I, take good care of yourself, son. Don't let anything stop you from being strong and the best at what you do." And as fate would have it, he died the very next day.

Was I getting inner strength confused with outer appearance? Ever since they died, I suppose I had quit opening up to people so I could appear strong, because that is what my father asked of me. His dying wish, one might say.

Then I met Fai. He was annoying 90% of the time, very loud, overly playful, and incredibly skinny, but something drew me toward him as if we were magnets. Polar opposites, but we attracted and soon formed a bond that blossomed into this relationship, that I was obviously destroying.

It was a relationship, right? I never formally asked him to be my boyfriend, but we had an understanding. He had told me he loved me that night on the beach. And that's all he wanted back from me. Aside from our… naughty moments, he also wanted some emotion from me. Why was it so hard for me to give that to him? It can't be anymore…

How he concealed these feelings all this time is a mystery to me, but now, two days later, he is giving me one last chance. And I can't let it slip away. He needs me to do this for him. For his mental health.

Now I was worried that the damned fool might consider suicide…. That worried me more than the thought of Fai leaving me. If he left, I could go get him, apologize, and bring him back into my arms. If he did something to himself, I would never be able to tell him how I actually feel. He would never know. He would die thinking I didn't love him, and it would be partially because of my own faults and me not being strong enough to just tell him.

No, that wasn't happening. No way.

I didn't have to pee anymore. I was too anxious and worried about him. He wasn't back yet. For all I knew, he was in my room, trying to decide which sword he would like inside of him. Or he was out buying rope to tie the noose that he would later introduce to his neck. I shuddered, but I knew it wasn't too late to save our relationship, and him. I decided to write him a short note once I found a pen.

Fai,

Sorry for reading this journal of yours. But what I'm even more sorry for is how I've been treating you this past month. I only read entries from April 7 onward to' the last one because I got bored here in this closet and I didn't realize what I was reading until it was too late and I was already hooked and had to read more.

I have some thing to confess and explain. Fa

All of a sudden, I heard a noise I was very glad to hear, causing me to accidentally write a giant scribble instead of an "i". I turned around even though I couldn't see though the door.

"Oh, Kuro-puu!" I had heard Fai call. Never was I so happy to hear my name slandered.

"Are you ready yet?" he asked me.

I took a deep preparatory breath and shut the journal.

"Yes, I am." I replied, sure of myself. "But you have to open the door first."

"Even though you call me an idiot all the time, you and I both know I'm not one! You're just going to run away if I let you out of there, Kuro-sneaky!"

I took another breath.

"No, Fai, I'm not going to run away. Really, I'm not."

He seemed to be considering it. He probably only decided to open the door because I called him by his name.

"Alright, I'm going to trust you, Kuro-puu. Time for you to come out of the closet!" he giggled. I would have to punch him for that little joke later. Now was not the time.

My eyes adjusted from the dim, single closet lightbulb to the natural sunlight coming in through the windows. I looked down at the man who had confined me. He was smiling up at me, waiting patiently. When he had first locked me in the closet, I thought I was going to chase him around that house to catch and kill him. Now though, all I could think to do was take his hand. He began to blush.

"Recognize this?" I asked, holding up his journal.

"My diary!" he squealed as he reached for it. "Give it, Kuro-puu!"

I put it up, almost against the ceiling, almost out of his range.

"Calm down, will you? I'll explain once you do."

He crossed his arms and pouted.

"I'm waiting!"

"Okay, look…. I read a little bit of it. Just a little, because I was bored as hell in there. It was the first thing I picked up and I didn't realize what it was I was reading until it was too late, and I had to keep going. I started on your April 7 entry where you're talking about that day we went to the park for that picnic, and you said I was cranky by the end of the trip. Yeah, I was. Because I needed to finish not only my homework, but other work as well. I'm sorry if I was the ants of the picnic that day, but I really did have to work."

"Anything else you read?" he asked me.

"Yeah. Then you went on to the dream you kept having about me leaving."

I paused for dramatic effect. It seemed to work.

"Don't you ever think like that again."

"I can't control my dreams, Kuro-silly!"

"Asleep or not, don't you ever think that! Yeah, you're annoying as hell sometimes, but I wouldn't leave you for something trivial like that!"

He smiled, when asked, "Any particular reason you wouldn't? Maybe because… something?"

I knew what he was getting at. But it would have to wait.

"Skipping ahead," I said, ignoring him, "to our six month anniversary or whatever. That day… I wouldn't normally celebrate something like that, but I'm sorry that I made it such a bad day for you. I'm not going to do that anymore, but I think I should at least… let you know why I was so upset that day."

"Yes, why were you so Kuro-angry that day?"

"Because… because…."

Now that the moment was here, I hesitated, not sure if I could say the words out loud. I knew I had to, but it would be hard. I took a deep breath to gather up the strength to tell Fai.

"That was the day my parents died," I told Fai as calmly as I could. His mischievous smile fell as soon as the sounds left my vocal chords.

"Wha… what?"

"April 17. Their death day. Both of them. A year ago."

"Oh, I am so sorry, Kuro-sama!" he said as he glomped me into a big hug, tying his legs around my waist and his arms around my neck. The hug made me take a step backward.

"We don't have to celebrate that day anymore! We won't!" he cried very sorrowfully and buried his face into my neck.

"Good, but I only told you because I wanted to you to know the reason I was so reluctant to do anything that day. When I read in here how sad you were… I couldn't take it. When I read how you thought about leaving, that was even worse. But what killed me was when you talked about your own death."

He lifted his head up so that I could see his eyes. It seemed like he was on the verge of tears.

"Fai, I love you. You are not dying over me."

I dropped the journal on the bed, and with that hand I took the man at his waist. The other, pushed his head forward into a tender kiss. He pressed into me to deepen the kiss. We had never kissed quite like this. I could tell he was savoring every piece of the moment and really enjoying himself.

When I pulled him back, tears were rolling down his face.

"I love you too. This was all I ever wanted!"

I put him down after one more kiss and let him dry his eyes. I shut the closet door and went to exit his room, but not before I asked him one last question.

"Now, what's for dinner tonight? Spaghetti?"

He smiled at me as he wiped his last tear away.

"Whatever you want tonight, Kuro-puu!"

"Great, then we're having lah-sagg-na."

"Hahaha, it's pronounced lasagna, Kuro-silly!" he laughed at my unusual pronunciation of the Italian food.

"Whatever, just get in the kitchen. I have had to use the bathroom for far too long."

We had a nice dinner, him smiling and laughing, me trying to figure out how to use that damned fork. Fai almost always smiled. Everyone knew that. There was something a little different about this though…. I thought back to how I figured out he was hiding his pain and still kept smiling.

There was no way that face was a facade. I had prevented our relationship from failing, and as a reward, I got to see him truly happy for once.

Thanks for reading!
Likey? No likey? Enjoy? Laughed? Cried? Moved? Melted?
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