"I'm gonna smile really big for you. Okay, Yukito?" Misuzu flashed the widest smile she could muster and watched her reflection carefully. The Misuzu-in-the-mirror's smile slowly fell apart under the real Misuzu's scrutiny, melting into a straight line and stopping at last at a slight frown.
I've been practicing so that I'll be really good at smiling. It's harder than you'd think, actually. Sometimes when I smile, I can't help but cry.
Misuzu had been practicing her smile in front of the mirror since the day she had met Yukito. She knew that every time she made a new friend, she broke down. After that, her new friend always left. She didn't want Yukito to leave. She wanted to stay with him as long as she could. She wanted to play at the beach and watch his puppet shows, even if everyone else thought they were silly. She loved his magical puppet and his stories of the girl in the sky. She wanted to listen to him tell her all his stories and she wanted to watch the waves lick at the shore's toes. She couldn't do any of that if he left. And if she cried, he'd leave. Then, this summer would be like all the other lonely summers she'd suffered.
Then I start to think of that girl in the sky you told me about. I've seen her in my dreams. She's so sad. Always sad. I've never seen her smile. It's kinda strange, but sometimes I think she never will.
Misuzu's eye strayed to the window. The blue sky tempted and taunted her. She would love to fly, but it didn't seem possible. Perhaps, there was another Misuzu in the sky, dancing on the wind. She liked to think that, because that would mean that, maybe, just maybe, she would be able to fly someday. She thought that if she was in the sky, she would be happier than she had ever been in her life. Why was that other girl so sad?
Say, Yukito? Do you think we could make her smile? I don't think it's possible, but I'd like to try. But I think I'll have to learn to smile first. I need to stop crying. But I just feel so sad. I don't know where it comes from, but this sadness just fills me. Sometimes I think I'll never be happy.
Misuzu forced herself to part with the sky momentarily. Looking back at the mirror, she tried another smile. It looked fake to her. Misuzu swallowed, feeling tears gather up in her eyes. She would not cry, she reminded herself firmly. She needed to be cheerful.
That's why I have to smile. Because if I smile enough, I'll feel really happy.
Misuzu thought of happy things, so that the smile she wanted would leap involuntarily to her lips. Warm summer nights with skies full of stars. A day at the beach, laughing in the sun. The sun setting on the water, spreading red, pink and orange across the darkening sky. One friend. Just one friend would give her a lifetime of smiles, she thought.
I can't help but think that if that girl in the sky would smile, she'd be happy too.
Just smiling had lifted Misuzu's mood. She felt so much better, filled up with warm memories of things that hadn't quite happened yet with that bright smile spread across her face.
Up there in the sky. It's so beautiful. The sky never ends and the sun is so warm and the wind is so nice. I can't see why she never smiles, except, I guess she must be lonely. Up there by herself. She has no one at all to talk to. Only the wind.
Misuzu had never had a real live friend. She whispered her scanty secrets to her dinosaur toys and hugged them tightly to her chest when she felt all alone. But, they never talked back. They only stared blankly at her with their painted plastic eyes and remained silent. Absolutely silent.
"So, I'm gonna smile really, really big for her so she knows she's not alone. That'll work. Right, Yukito?" Misuzu whispered to herself. It was nice to hear another voice. It made her hope for friendship and happiness. But she was always sad when she remembered she was only talking to herself.
Misuzu wanted to believe that she and that girl in the sky could be happy someday. They just needed one friend, one smile. They both needed to know they were not alone.
I'll smile for both of you! Because if you're smiling, you're happy and if you're happy, you'll never feel alone.