I lay next to him on his bed. Jacob was sleeping soundly and I knew it as wrong for me to be there, but my coming here had been an impulse I couldn't control.

I had crept in through the window without Billy noticing, and Charlie seemed to have bought my story about spending the night at Jessica's house. I prayed that Edward really was planning on hunting all night tonight, because if he caught me here, there was no way i could explain my way out of it. This was pure madness.

I knew Jacob had been out with the pack all night, so when i snuck in late in the day, i expected him to be asleep. I had hoped he would be. I needed some time just to look at him... just to stare at him, just to let his face, his body, be imprinted in my mind, memorised forever, just as he was.

Dusk was just starting to fall around La Push, and a thick mist was encroaching. through Jacobs' window. I saw the world turning into a dreamscape and came undone just a little bit inside. I was glad I was lying down because my body was feeling weak, like the weight of my heart could not be supported by my body any more. Like I was drifting away, and loosing all control.

I gently traced the line of a long scar on his chest, back and forth. He shivered a little in his sleep, his dark lashes pressing against his cheek. I felt a yawning hole in my stomach, an aching that only he could cure.

"Bella..." he mumbled, softly, deeply. "Bella."

He rolled to face me, trapping my hand beneath the weight of his arm. He hadn't even woken up. Could he have been dreaming about me? My heart fluttered and I felt my cheeks grow hot. I wanted him so badly. Inside of me. Like I had never wanted anything else before. Yet my being here was the greatest betrayal, to Edward, to the Cullen's, and even to Jacob. God knows what my indecision must be doing to him. But the heat within me was so strong that I knew I couldn't stop myself even I wanted to.

I gave up battling with myself. I was here now, I knew what I wanted and I couldn't deny it any more. I wriggled my arm free and began to rub my palm from his shoulder to his hip. The friction was incredible. I let myself work my hands into the dip of his groin, tickling, teasing myself... imagining.

His body started to move in rhythm with my hand, slowly, then faster and faster, until my palm reached his cock and I felt it throbbing under his shorts. I gasped and without hardly a second to compose myself he was awake, on top of me, pinning me down, a fire blazing in his eyes.

"Bella," he growled, "you are driving me crazy."

He looked me up and down, lying trapped there beneath him. I felt his hardness against me, turning me on. His eyes fucked me, I was weak with desire, he looked hungry, impassioned, impatient.

He grabbed my t-shirt and yanked it over my head with one hand. I heard the seams rip but I didn't care. My breast were heaving and there was nothing between his bare chest and mine. He began kissing me on the neck, right from behind my ear, down to my chest. He cupped me breast and kneaded it into his mouth sucking at it and burrowing his face into my cleavage. I pulled him up by is chin. I was panting.

"Kiss me, don't make me wait..."

His mouth was so near mine, his breath so hot and his smell so intoxicating...

"You have made me wait long enough, Bells." His eyes were dark and brooding, like he was contemplating letting me suffer.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry, I just cant go on like this any more... I want you more than I even know how to explain... I want you on me... in me..."

He grabbed me by the back of my neck and pulled my face up to his, smothering me in deep, passionate kisses, filled with all the love and sexuality that only Jacob could muster.

"Who am i to argue," he laughed, "I want you more than I want anything."

I was panting with desire, my legs trembling beneath him. He slipped down my body, his hands feeling every curve of my breasts, my back, my hips, my thighs...

He unbuttoned my jeans and hoisted his hands in around my ass, pulling my crotch right up to his nose. he nuzzled into me, making me burn.

"Fuck you smell good," he said as he ripped my underwear right off and yanked my jeans to the floor.

He buried his face between my legs and I let out a moan that I could not control.

"Shh... Bella." he smiled cheekily, before plunging his tongue back on to me. Circling my clit, sucking at me, pushing his hand down on my opening until the pressure within me was beginning to explode. I bucked my hips towards him, so unfamiliar with the amazing heat, and the buzzing through my body was driving me past all control.

I grabbed his pillow and shoved it over my face as i screamed with the intensity of my orgasm, my legs shaking and locking around his head. Once I breathed again he lay his head against my twitching thigh and looked up lazily at me, proud and content and satisfied with himself. He licked his lips.

"Now," he said calmly, propping himself up on one arm, "has it ever been that good for you with your Cullen?"

His comment twisted in me, but I had to be honest.

"Honestly..." I swallowed nervously, "I have never experienced anything even remotely as amazing."

He smiled at me, and a pure happiness radiated out of him, and in to me.

He jumped up lithely, "I've got to go have a cold shower," he laughed, pointing to his shorts.

"Oh god," I said, barely masking my embarrassment, "shouldn't I... help you with that?"

He smiled at the obvious insecurity on my face, God why must I be so blatantly inexperienced?

He strode over to me and took my face in his hands, "don't worry about it, ok? We can take this slow, plus there would be no hiding my noises from Billy."

I tried to feel relieved as he headed off to the shower, but I was feeling so guilty about my inadequacy. I wanted to make it up to him so badly it hurt.

I lay on my back and tried to relax and enjoy all the amazing tingles in my body. I couldn't believe how reckless I was being, how indulgent. I just felt like if I denied myself this fantasy II might explode with my desire. The very nearness of him made me quiver.

I heard the shower pipes being wrenched off, and the clumsy, boyish sounds of Jacob rummaging around in the kitchen and the muffled noises of his conversation with Billy.

I attempted to look sultry and composed when I heard him coming down the hall. I couldn't believe how goddamn nervous I was.

He closed the door behind him and dropped his towel nonchalantly, rifling through his draw for a pair of sweat pants. I caught my breath, God his body was to die for.

"So, I just told dad I would take him over to see Charlie..." He smiled at me mischievously, ""so if you can sit tight here for a minute, we'll have the whole place to ourselves."

I imagined what he might do to me if we had no constraints - how it would feel to let our love for each other spill over into the physical, to finally share everything with him. It was more temptation than i could resist.

I matched his impish grin, and he kissed me hotly, slowly, passionately before dashing out the door. He knew I wasn't going anywhere. This decision was final.