"Your 2010 Midwest Regional Show Choir Champions...

Vocal Adrenaline."

Her heart had shattered the second that Ms. Sylvester's mouth formed a V. They had lost. They had given everything, yet somehow they had still lost. Jesse smirked at her; he had gotten exactly what he wanted, he had won. Rachel closed her eyes and looked away, it was still too painful to look into those emerald eyes of his. She had rushed away the moment they were dismissed; given him no chance to shove his victory in her face or say something that would cause her to go running back into his arms.

I love you.

She had felt nothing when Finn told her he loved her. No spark, no butterflies. She instantly saw Jesse's face, but she pushed it from her mind immediately.

I loved you.

God, how it killed her to hear the past tense. What had she done wrong? He had forgiven her for "Run Joey Run." He'd come back to her with open arms; told her he would never leave again, never miss her drama. Why had he broken her heart?

She remembered the sick to her stomach feeling she'd had every day before she went to school after the day Jesse broke her. She remembered vomiting in the bathroom at Regionals seconds after Vocal Adrenaline's showstopping performance and just before her teammates returned for the results.

Was it true that he had no feelings? That nothing inevitably did matter to him? She wished she could believe it. But the eyes, those eyes he had given her just before he smashed the egg on her head, just as he had raised the trophy in the air…those looks couldn't have meant nothing.

"Rachel?"

She snapped out of her reverie. The Glee club was sitting in Mr. Schuester's living room, having a meeting to decide what to do now that Glee club was on hiatus. Though they had performed "To Sir, With Love" that afternoon, everyone looked miserable, so Rachel's watering eyes weren't out of place.

"Hmm?" Rachel responded meekly, wiping tears from the corner of her eyes.

"Are you okay?" Rachel sniffed and smiled weakly.

"I'll be okay Mr. Shue. It's just…hard." She began to weep again. Mercedes looked at her sympathetically, while Kurt put a hand on her shoulder—one of the few nice gestures he'd ever shown towards her. Suddenly and violently, Rachel felt her stomach churn, and the same sickly feeling return. She had no time to excuse herself, no time to give a warning before she hurried into the bathroom and flung her head over the toilet bowl. She sat there for a whole two minutes, tears leaking from her eyes and running down her cheeks. Mr. Schuester stood outside the door, knocking softly.

"Rachel? Is everything okay?"

"I'm fine!" Rachel squeaked, examining the remnants of her bean burrito swirling around in the bowl as she flushed. Will looked after her for a moment before turning back to the rest of the club.

"What's that about?" Puck questioned. Shue shook his head.

"Not sure." Rachel bounded out of the bathroom, putting on her best showface.

"I'm fine. I must have simply eaten something that caused me to feel ill. Nothing to worry about, right? We're here about Glee, so that's what we're going to discuss." She flashed a smile to the rest of the club. Quinn's eyes lingered on her for a few moments, while Finn handed her a glass of water.

After a heated discussion, they came to the conclusion that, school sponsored or no, Glee would continue. If they had to, they would hold rehearsals in Will's apartment, but the club would not be disbanded, even it was on paper.

That night, Rachel stared at the ceiling, unable to find sleep despite how hard she tried. Her mind kept floating back to another time, a time when she and Jesse lied on the very same bed. He had told her he loved her, that he would never hurt her; that she was all he wanted. When did the lies stop? Had he ever cared about her, or had it all been a farce, all been a fantasy that she'd concocted in her mind?

"Are you sure you're ready?" Jesse ran a hand lovingly up her thigh. Rachel closed her eyes for a moment before answering.

"Yes. I love you Jesse." Jesse laughed and kissed her nose tenderly.

"I love you, Rachel Berry. My shining star." He began to kiss her neck, and she tensed. "I would never hurt you."

They laid, wrapped up in blankets and sheets. She faced away from him, but his arm held her bare shoulder softly. He leaned over to whisper in her ear, but she spoke before he could.

"Was I okay?" He laughed and spun her towards him.

"Rachel, you were more than okay. You were wonderful. How could you even ask such a thing?"

"And you really love me?"

"Of course. More than ever."

Rachel's eyes snapped open. Any brief sleep she may have been getting was shot from her mind, replaced with a terrifying realization. She sprung from the bed and glanced at the calendar tacked to her bulletin board. She was hit with another terrifying blow when her suspicions were correct—she was late. She had been so overwhelmed with Regionals and Glee and Jesse and Heartbreak that she hadn't even been paying attention to her period schedule, and now here it was, plain as day: she should have started two weeks ago.

Head in her hands, she cried her heart out. If she were right, everything would change now.