The First Step

The story continues. If you haven't read the prequel "Dream as if You'll Live Forever, I suggest you do so. You won't be able to understand some of the following story without reading that first. Thank you to all of you who faithfully followed my previous story. I hope you continue to enjoy as we follow Jack and Sam and their life together.

As always, they're not mine! I'm only borrowing them for a while.

In the end he had stayed at Daniel's that night. Oh, he would have loved to have stayed with Sam – even just to curl up and hold her would have been enough. Both of them were tired, exhausted from all they had been through – but they were finally together. Life looked sweet! There was once again hope and dreams and possibilities.

Even with all of that, they both recognized that there was still more to work out. This was not the end, but the beginning. The journey was just starting and they were unsure as to what the next step would be.

The last few days had been full of dreams, and of nightmares, truth be told, but now reality had returned. Tomorrow they would have to face that reality – but at least they would face it together.

They both knew that until decisions were made and actions decided they would have to step carefully. They agreed that, for now, they would behave with discretion. They would continue to act within those pesky regulations. They would adhere to the rules – but only for a little while! But they agreed not for long. They were both ready for the next step.

Jack also knew that things going forward would not be a 'cake walk' (too bad, he laughed to himself, considering how much I like cake!). He and Sam had a lot to work out. They had been caught up in the emotions of the last few days – they had also been caught up in the wonder and excitement of a love discovered, a love revealed, a love shared. He understood that real life, the ups and downs of living in the reality of the world, could quickly tarnish and even destroy that love. He had experienced that once – he refused to let it happen again.

His relationship with Sam had always been within the confines of their relationship as soldiers, as officers. There had always been the issue of ranks and chain of command. It was going to take hard work and lots of talking (he sighed) to work out a new way of relating. He was confident in their love for each other. He was not so confident in how they would deal with a different way of being together.

Although tired he had expressed some of these thoughts and worries to Sam. Thankfully, she understood, and agreed. They decided to take things slowly, not to rush into anything. The wonderful thing was they now had time. With youth restored they could afford to spend time getting to know each other outside of their jobs. So, for a while – at least once they had cleared things with the Air Force – they had agreed to simply date.

In the end, he decided to spend the night at Daniel's. Staying so close to Sam he knew he would have been tempted to throw discretion to the wind. It was quite late – well past 2:00 a.m. by the time he arrived, by cab, at Daniel's. He let himself in, quietly, and quickly crashed. He fell asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow. Just as he fell asleep he felt Sam's warm presence wrapping itself around him. Even with distance, he realized, they were still joined. With a smile on his face he rested.

"Wakey, Wakey Jack! It's time to get up." called Daniel "Come on Jack – you gotta get up and make it to the base."

Jack groaned and rolled over. God, what had he been up to that made him so tired? Surely not some Pentagon party? Or, maybe some marathon diplomatic session? Wait, no, that was Daniel calling him. What was Daniel doing in Washington? With that thought Jack opened his eyes and realized that he wasn't at home, in his bed.

"Wha ? Daniel? What's goin' on. What are you doin' here?"

"Well Jack, I happen to live here. What time did you get in from Sam's last night?"

"Sam's? What are you….?" Suddenly Jack sat up straight in bed. "Daniel, I didn't just dream all that did I? It actually happened?"

"If you mean going to Trelea, getting put through multiple torture tests, being identified as the Chosen One, joined in some Ancient rite to Sam, with whom you've been in love for years, looking about 20 years younger and becoming telepathic? No – you just dreamed it."

"Daniel!"

"Well Jack, what did you want me to say. Surely you know it wasn't a dream?"

"Yeah – I guess I was just sleeping so deeply, when I was rudely woken up, that it took me a moment to remember everything." He looked up at Daniel and grinned. "But I'm sure as hell glad I have."

"Yeah – pretty amazing isn't it? Did everything go okay last night. I'm kinda surprised to see you here – although you're certainly welcome."

"Everything went fine, Daniel. Sam and I have agreed, until things are worked out with the President and the Joint Chiefs, that we'd better play it cool. Also, we want to take things a bit slowly."

"Slowly? Haven't you already taken it slowly? It's been years already."

"I know Daniel, but we don't want to screw things up. She's too important, this is too important and I wanna do things the right way. Besides, I think she deserves a bit of 'wooing' don't you?"

"Yes, she does indeed! Well, I admire your patience – and I guess you're right. Just don't leave it too long, okay? It's pretty obvious you're made for each other and with the Joining thing I think you're already a step ahead."

"I know, and you're right. Anyway, I don't think I could wait too long. She's pretty hot you know."

"Okay! La la la la la" Daniel, said, his fingers in his ears. "That's true but I so don't want to go there. Sam is like a sister to me so – too much information!"

Jack just grinned and started to get up. "Daniel, hand me my pants over there will ya. I have to get some clean clothes. I didn't expect to be gone so long."

"Ah Jack?"

"Yeah"

"Are you sure about this waiting thing?"

"I'm sure, why?"

"Ah well, here then. I suggest you do something with this. I don't think you'd want it to fall out of your pants when you're talking to the President." With that he handed Jack Sam's bra, which had fallen on the floor when Daniel had picked up his pants.

"Uh – thanks Danny", Jack replied, clearing his throat in embarrassment and looking quite red around the gills. "I didn't, I mean Sam just -uh – oh hell – just give me the damn thing!" He grabbed it and stuck it in his duffel bag.

Laughing, Daniel turned and headed out of Jack's room. "Coffee is on the stove and breakfast is ready when you are. Just one more thing Jack."

"What Daniel?"

"Ya might wanna double check there are no more incriminating pieces of underwear hidden anywhere on your person Jack. Bit hard to explain!"

Jack threw his pillow at Daniel, hitting him square in the back. Daniel simply laughed again – thrilled to see his friend speechless for once.

Jack and Daniel arrived at the SGC 45 minutes later. He knew that Sam was already there – having gotten going much quicker that morning. He hadn't had a chance to see her before making his way to the Infirmary for his checkup but had communicated with her – saying a quick 'good morning, I love you". He realized that they could still talk to one another across distance but it was easier the closer they were. It took quite a bit of mental energy to converse – probably just like having to shout to someone who was farther away, when speaking naturally.

They still had to spend some time figuring out exactly what had changed with the Joining. They both still worried and wondered about their 'dream' - whether in fact they had affected the Ori. They decided they would wait to investigate further. For now, figuring out their next steps as far as their relationship and the Air Force was top of mind.

"Well General, everything seems to check out okay although I'm seeing a tiny increase in cerebral activity. Are you sure you're not experiencing anything?" Dr. Lam stood in front of him with his chart in her hand.

"No, nothing. I'm feeling really good actually – although that may have more to do with the fact that my knees and back aren't hurting any more."

"Yes, as far as I can tell, there is no evidence of damage to your knees – or anywhere else for that matter. In fact, Sir, I got the complete report back first thing this morning. As far as we can tell, you have the body and stamina of someone in their early 20's. It's amazing really. I've never seen anything like it. I'm assuming that the process has now stopped. You don't feel any change from yesterday do you?"

"No, not at all. God – I hope this stops! I don't want to end up a kid."

"I'm sure that won't happen Sir. It would be extremely difficult for your body to – uh 'degrow'. It looks as if you have returned to the point at which your body reached full maturity – at least physically. Any younger and your skeletal system would have to begin to shrink. So – I expect you are as young as you are going to get."

"Thank God! As it is I don't know how the hell I'm going to explain any of this. There is no way plastic surgery is that good. Sam is lucky. She already looked a lot younger and so the change isn't so obvious. I mean, Good God, my hair is even going brown again. Talk about weird looking. I may have to dye it grey!"

"Just think Sir – you now have a whole new life to live. Endless possibilities and choices – and this time you can make those choices with the wisdom and experience of an older man!"

"Yeah, there is that I guess." As Dr. Lam looked at him in surprise he realized he sounded upset that he was suddenly a young man again. That was far from the truth – it was just so very confusing with everything else right now. "Don't worry Doc – I'm happy about this – it's just hard to know what to do right now."

"I understand General. Just take it easy for the next few days. If anything bothers you, or you notice any other changes, let me know right away."

"Will do Doc – and thanks!"

Well, I guess it's off to talk to the President now, he realized. Oh joy! Trying hard not to think too much about the upcoming conversation, he thought again about having the body of a 20 year old. Hey, he thought, that meant lots and lots of stamina – he grinned an evil grin. His next thought wiped that grin from his face. Hell – he also realized he was starting to feel incredibly horny (yup – he had forgotten what it was like to be that age and in an almost constant state of arousal around a beautiful woman). God, he hoped they could work things out quickly otherwise he didn't know if this new, 20 year old body, could take it!

"General?" Sam suddenly appeared at his side, obviously just having finished her physical as well.

"Carter, how ya doin' this morning?" He looked down at her and realized she was completely red in the face. "Hey, what's wrong? Everything okay? You look kind of flushed or something."

"Yes, Sir General, I, ah, it's nothing Sir."

"Come on Carter", he said, gently grabbing her arm and stopping her, "what is it?"

She just looked at him and communicated silently. "I just overheard you thinking about your new, young body Sir." If possible her face grew even redder.

"Oh. Geez – I'm sorry Carter, Sam. That wasn't meant for you."

"It wasn't?"

"No – I mean yes – oh hell, I mean I didn't mean for you to hear it – not that it wasn't meant – or wasn't about you." God, now he was blushing like a school girl. "But hey, Sam – how did you hear me. I didn't think I'd opened my mind to you like before."

"I don't know sir. Maybe it had to do with the subject matter."

"Yeah – that could be it – especially since I was definitely thinking of you just then! Oh crap – that means I'd better be careful, which is going to be really hard – ur I mean difficult with the way things are. Okay, that's it. I've gotta talk to the President and get things worked out. This can't go on much longer!"

By this time Sam was grinning broadly. She just loved to see Jack get himself into these messes. He was so adorable when he was flustered. She realized again how much she loved him when she described him as adorable. She was sure the many enemies, both human and otherwise, he had vanquished would never describe Jack O'Neill as 'adorable'.

Finally they arrived at Hank's office, for which Jack was extremely grateful. He didn't know how he would have ended that very uncomfortable conversation otherwise.

"Mornin Hank. I guess I'm supposed to call the President. I'm wondering if I could use your phone."

"Of course Jack. In fact, I was just speaking with him and told him you were on your way. He's waiting for your call. Colonel, why don't you and I wait in the Briefing Room and give General O'Neill some privacy."

"Yes Sir" the two officers walked out of the office. Sam sent a quick message to Jack, silently. "Be strong Jack and remember, I love you!"

"I know Sam, don't worry. And I love you too."

The call lasted only a few brief moments. Although Sam was unable to read Jack's thoughts or hear the conversation, she could sense his anger and frustration. Extremely worried now, she looked up at him sharply as he entered the Briefing Room.

"Over all ready Jack? That was quick. Everything okay?"

"No, everything is not okay. I'm sorry Hank. Carter and I have to fly to Washington right away. Can you get Walter to get us a flight – We'll take a hop from Peterson if there is one. Carter, I'm sorry – you'll have to go home and grab some things. We have to leave as soon as possible."

"Can you tell me what's wrong Jack?" asked Hank. "Is it about what happened on Trelea?"

"Yes and no. The President and Jumper are being unreasonable, pig-headed asses! Yes, I know, I know – I could get Court Marshaled for saying that, but I don't give a damn anymore. I will not let them screw up my life. Come on Carter let's go. Hank can you get us a driver? We'll head to Carter's and then straight to Peterson."

"Sure Jack – I'll arrange everything. And don't worry, I'm sure all will work out fine."

"Damn straight it will! Thanks Hank. I'll eventually explain everything."

On the way to the airport Jack tried to explain what had happened to Sam.

"I told the President that I wanted to talk to him about making some changes in my life – that I wanted a 'personal' life. He was fine with that until I mentioned your name. He said absolutely no – we were in the same chain of command and it would look bad. I tried to reason with him but he was obstinate. Normally he's a pretty reasonable person but every once in while he gets pig-headed and there's no moving him. I told him I wanted to speak with him and Jumper in person – and that I was bringing you. I'm sorry Sam – I don't want to put you through this but you have a right to be there too."

"Of course I do Jack. I wouldn't be anywhere else. Remember, together we can do this! Did you tell him about the Joining and our telepathic ability?"

"No, and I don't really want to. You know politicians. Even the best of them will want to exploit something like this. No, we have to make them agree based on the simple fact that we belong together. We can tell them about the Joining – but no details I think."

"Oh God Jack. I'm worried. What if this doesn't work out? What if they won't let us be together?"

"We're gonna be together Sam. I promise – even if we have to move to Chulak!"

With that pleasant thought the two frustrated and worried soldiers remained quiet as they headed onto the plane bound for Washington and the next test in their journey together.

Once they had arrived they immediately headed to Jack's place where they both changed into their dress uniforms. Might as well look your best when meeting the President. It also gave them both courage – which they knew they needed.

On arriving at the White House they were escorted quickly through security and upstairs to the waiting room. Obviously they had been anxiously awaited.

General, please go in. The President and General Jumper are waiting for you. Colonel Carter, you have been asked to wait here for now."

Jack walked over and, taking a deep breath, opened the door to the Oval office and walked in – but not before turning and winking at Sam. She gave him a quick, encouraging smile in return.

"Mr. President, General" Jack said formally as he entered the room.

"Jack – that was quick! Welcome and please be seated." the President said graciously.

Jack sat on the couch, facing President Hayes and Jumper. Geesh – he felt like he was standing in front of a firing squad.

"So Jack, I've been telling the General here what you told me on the phone. Needless to say, we're both quite concerned about what's been going on and what's led up to this situation."

"With all due respect Sirs, there is no 'situation'. Colonel Carter and I have never acted in any improper way. We have always put the Air Force and the rules first. We have known, for some time, however, that we felt more for each other than as mere friends or colleagues. Although I want to make clear, again, that nothing untoward ever happened. We did not even acknowledge, to each other, that 'feelings' existed."

"So what changed, Jack?", asked Jumper.

"Sir, the planet Trelea and what we went through."

"Can you be specific? Tell us exactly what happened."

So, Jack explained, in as much detail as possible, exactly what had occurred on the planet. He left out a couple of things, of course, including the fact that he and Sam had entered into a physical relationship while on Trelea. He did make it clear, however, that the Joining ensured that they had to be together."

"Why Jack? What did the Joining do that means you have to be together?" asked Hayes.

"We were 'Joined' Sir. That means that we saw everything there is to see, to know about the other. We are truly one in mind and spirit" (he figured the 'and body' part was best left alone). I don't think we can exist if we aren't together. I know that sounds melodramatic but it's true Sirs. Even thinking about it terrifies me."

"But is this natural Jack? Is this truly love or some alien induced reaction?" this from Jumper.

"It's real General. I've felt this way for a long time. It's just that the Joining made it possible – made it a reality, not just a dream. Sirs, you know I've given everything to my country, to our world. I would never do anything to jeoperdize that. But this, this is too important, too vital. According to the aliens we have to be together. It's part of our destiny."

"Okay, see here, I don't get this 'destiny' thing. What in hell does it mean?" asked the President.

"I'm not quite sure either Sir" (can one be punished for lying to the President, Jack wondered?). I just know they said it was vital to the world's future. But honestly Sir, even if it wasn't, even if it was just about us, I'd still make the same decision. I love her Mr. President, General, and I'm not willing to negotiate on that."

With that there was silence in the room. Both the President and the General realized that the irrisistable force had met the immovable object! Jack was not going to give on this one. They both knew him too well, had seen him too many times in action to believe that he was bluffing. Okay, that meant that they had to come up with a workable solution. They knew if they ordered him to not see Sam Carter that he would just turn around and do something crazy like escape to another galaxy!

"All right then General. We'd better come up with a solution quickly. We can't let this go until someone gets a hold of it and creates real trouble."

"Mr. President, I think the best solution is for me to resign. I .."

Here Jumper interjected quickly. "Sorry, no way Jack. We can't let you go. You're too valuable to the program, to the Air Force – God to the whole damn planet. Besides, I may have to have you take on more responsibility soon anyway."

"Why Sir? Is something wrong?"

"Yes, family problems – nothing that need concern you now – but it means you can't retire. We need you too badly."

"Sir, is it your wife? Is she okay?'

"Yes, it's my wife. How did you know that? Nobody else does, we haven't said anything."

"Sorry General Jumper – it's just something I found out on the planet. Somehow the aliens knew. I hope she'll be fine Sir."

"Thank you Jack – we haven't got the results back yet, but we're hoping for the best. But, to get back to the point Jack, I'm afraid retirement is a no go.

"But Sirs, how can I go back to the Pentagon? How will we ever explain my sudden youthfulness? There's no way we can explain it away naturally."

"We'll figure something out General, don't worry. Washington soldiers and bureaucrats are used to seeing all sorts of weird, wild and wonderful things", snorted the President. "But General Jumper is right Jack. You can't retire. It'll have to be Colonel Carter"

"No way, Sir, no way! There's no way a brilliant officer like Carter should have to loose her career over something like this. Is there no way you can just waive the regulations?"

"Sorry Jack", signed Jumper, "as much as I'd like to and as much as you both deserve some consideration and some concessions, you know that that can't happen. What kind of example would that set to all the officers and airman under you? It would look like you curried special favor. In the long run it would probably harm Colonel Carter's career even more than a blatant disregard of the regs would."

"Yeah, you're right Sir. I know – that's why we never did anything in the past. We knew it was a terrible dilemma. So, what can we do – cause I'm tellin' you – I'm not giving her up!"

The President and Jumper again looked at each other. Finally, the President spoke. "Well, Jack, we've come up with one possible solution. It's not ideal but it's the best we can do. I hope you and Colonel Carter realize that there will be consequences no matter what we do. You'll probably get by with a little gossip and innuendo. Unfortunately, a lot worse is going to be said about the Colonel. No matter what we do, if you two want to be together there will be gossip and it will most likely affect Colonel Carter's career. There will always be those who will accuse her of sleeping her way to the top. Are you okay with that Jack?"

"No, of course I'm not Mr. President. I'll feel like I want to shoot anyone who even intimates such a thing. But I'm not the one that has to make that decision. It's up to Colonel Carter. I can't make it for her – as she's reminded me on numerous occasions lately", he laughed. "So what is your solution Sir?"

"Well, we discussed it before you arrived, pretty sure that you wouldn't give up."

Jack raised his eyebrows in disbelief. Damn! – he had just gone through hell and it turns out they were going to give in all the time.. It's a good thing he had year's of discipline behind him or he may have thrown his career away in one fell swoop by telling the Air Force Chief of Staff, as well as the President of the United States, exactly what he thought of their jerking him around!

"We figured that the best thing would be for Colonel Carter to take a job in the private sector – maybe with a university or something."

"I thought I made it clear that her giving up her career wasn't an option! Sir?", he reiterated.

"Just hear me out Jack! What we are proposing is that Colonel Carter take a leave of absence for a year. During that time she can take a research position or something similar, somewhere close to Washington. She won't be in your chain of command anymore; in fact she technically won't be in the Air Force. She would then be able to pursue a relationship with you. After a year or so she would be returned to duty, restored to full rank and pay. She would not be penalized for her time away. And if, during her time as a private citizen, you were to say, get married, there would no longer be an issue with command as the regulations allow for married officers to serve together. The only stipulation would be that you would have no say in any of her future promotions."

Jack sat there stunned for a moment. He couldn't see anything wrong with the scenario. In fact, if it were true, it seemed ideal. Of course, he had no idea how Sam would react. Would she resent having to be the one to take time off? How would she feel knowing that there would be talk and innuendo. The President was right - there would be those who would always assume that they had carried on an affair for years. It might, in fact, affect future promotions. It would probably make it difficult for her to make General.

All of this went through his mind quickly, as the two other men waited for his reaction. Finally he looked up and said, "it seems a fair compromise, Sirs. As I said, it's not up to me – it's up to Colonel Carter."

"If that's the case, why don't we invite the Colonel in and discuss it with her. If she doesn't agree, though, Jack, I don't know what else we can do."

"I understand Sirs. Thank you for this."

The President rang through to his secretary, asking her to send in Colonel Carter. Within seconds the door had opened and in walked Sam.

God, she was nervous. As a child she had always been extremely well-behaved, a model student, in fact. She had never been sent to the office but now knew what it must have felt like. The whole time she sat in the outer office, palms sweating and heart beating, she had panicked about what was happening.

As she entered the Oval Office she glanced over at Jack. Relieved to see him look relatively calm, she was puzzled that she couldn't read him. He was obviously closing himself off to her – why she couldn't understand. Little did she realize it was because he didn't want to influence her decision. He knew that she had to be the one to decide – it was her career at stake.

She saluted General Jumper and greeted the President who asked her to be seated. He then explained to her what he had proposed to Jack. He left nothing out, even the part about the potential damage to her career even with this plan.

She sat back and sighed in relief. God, what a fantastic solution, she thought. She had imagined things being much worse. She had been sure, in fact, that they were just going to say no. She had sat conjuring up all sorts of fantastic plans in which she and Jack escaped to another planet and hid out for years, away from earth.

When she didn't speak for a long while, Jack became very worried. Oh no, he thought, she doesn't like this. She's going to say no. Just as his heart felt like it had fallen to his shoes, he received a silent message from her, loud and clear.

"This is wonderful Jack! See, you were right. Everything is going to work out just fine!"

In wonder he looked up and saw that she was smiling. He then heard her say, to the President and to Jumper.

"I think this is a great solution Sirs. Thank you. I accept."

They spent the next hour working out all the details but finally Jack and Sam were able to leave. Sam's leave of absence would start in a week – just enough time for her to clear out all her projects. In the meantime, they would see if they could find her a research or teaching position at a university somewhere in or around Washington.

As the President's personal driver drove them to Jack's house, Sam couldn't quite believe how things had gone. She was excited, not only by the prospect of working things out and building a life with Jack but also about her leave of absence. She never would have believed it but she was actually looking forward to the break. Over the years she had sometimes wondered what it would have been like not to have gone into the Air Force. It's not that she regretted her choice, but there were times where she had yearned for a more normal life. Well, now she had the chance to see if she had made the right decision!

What was even more exciting was that she was going to be living close by. She could see Jack regularly and really work to get to know him as a civilian, not as an officer under his command. She couldn't help but smile at how things had worked out.

Jack too sat there quietly on the ride home. The whole scenario was way better than he had hoped. God, back at the SGC he had been prepared for the fight of his life. As it was, he'd gotten everything he'd dreamed of. He looked over at Sam and saw her smiling. He couldn't help but grin in response.

"Come here", he said. She slid over and leaned her head on his shoulder. He put his arms around her. "I wish your leave started right now. Then I could do more than just hold you."

"I know. I wish that too. But it's only a week. We've waited years – a few days won't make any difference."

"Yeah I know. I love you Sam and thank you."

"I love you too. But thank me for what?"

"For agreeing to take the leave. For putting up with the possibility of this affecting your career. For loving me enough to do this thing. For just loving me."

"You don't have to thank me Jack. Don't you know that I'm getting so much in return? We're in this together."

"Yeah – Together!"

The car slowly drove home, no one realizing that inside were two people, chosen by fate to embark on a whole new life, a whole new adventure – together.