.

.

They lie sated on Tanda's pallet, the afternoon light slanting through the windows.

Her explanation is startling simple: "If you marry someone else, I can't come and go as I please. So it would be better for me if we make our arrangement official. Provided, of course, that you still agree."

"I-" Tanda blinks. "Of course."

Balsa nods, then tugs the covers around them. "I will not make a good wife," Balsa says. "I do not intend to change my ways."

"No," Tanda says.

"But I do love you," Balsa says. The words are matter-of-fact, so much so that Tanda almost misses the meaning. "And if marrying you will make you happy, then I will gladly sacrifice that much. You've already sacrificed so much for me..."

Tanda's eyes dim. "It shouldn't be a sacrifice," Tanda says, and Balsa makes an irritated sound, pressing against his side.

"You are such a woman," Balsa says. She brushes back the hair from his eyes, pressing a light kiss on his cheek.

xXx

.

The wedding is a simple one, a small Yakue ceremony where Balsa and Tanda drink from the same cup.

"You are now married," Torogai says, and despite himself Tanda starts to cry.

"Forgive me, Balsa," Tanda says. Balsa smiles and rubs soothing circles against Tanda's back, then gently presses against his arm.

xXx

.

It isn't his idea when Balsa insists he come with her, dragging him through the mountains and tramping through snowdrifts toward her homeland.

"You're the one who didn't want to be left behind," Balsa says. She hefts her pack and moves forward, Tanda stumbling after.

Later, Tanda is glad he came: a sword to the gut do nothing for Balsa's health, and it's only Tanda's proximity that keeps her from crossing to the other side.

"My husband worries too much," Balsa says, and she smiles a little when she closes her eyes.

xXx

.

They're running through the back woods, Balsa's newest job throwing the both of them in peril. "Tanda." Balsa's face is pale. "Tanda, I-"

She doubles over, then vomits behind the trees.

It's Tanda who helps her home, letting her lean on him and looking decidedly green.

"Maybe it's a stomach virus," Tanda says, and he crushes some herbs and raises a cup to Balsa's lips.

She throws it up, and then some, retching pathetically in the corner.

"My apprentice is truly an idiot," Torogai says, when Tanda returns and begs for her help. "The woman is pregnant. Even a blind goat can see that."

"What?" Tanda blinks. "Pregnant?"

"Yes, yes, pregnant," Torogai says. "That's what happens when a man takes a woman. Or are you too stupid to realize even that?"

"What do I tell Balsa?" Tanda says. Torogai grins.

"Tell her the truth. And watch yourself, because you may get injured in the process," Torogai says.

xXx

.

As it turns out, pregnancy does not exactly soothe Balsa's violent tendencies.

"This is your fault!" Balsa says. She's pregnant and angry, and Tanda is standing in the corner, hands up and trying to calm her down. "How am I supposed to find work when I'm like this?" She gestures to her belly, six month's swollen and looking about to burst. Tanda flushes, despite himself.

"Balsa, it's okay," Tanda says. He just barely manages to dodge the spear being hurled at his head. "We can get by. I can sell my herbs-"

"It won't be enough!" Balsa says. Tanda bites back his tongue, knowing the heady milieu of hormones and fatigue are affecting Balsa's sense of judgment. "How can we care for a child when we cannot even pay our rent?"

There is no reasoning with her, this wild woman carrying his child. So Tanda braves the storm and wraps his arms around her, holding her until she relaxes in his arms.

xXx

.

Balsa is asleep, and in the dark Tanda can just make out the slope of her shoulder, the soft tendrils of hair framing her face. Her face is smooth and her skin feels surprisingly soft; Tanda smiles. He presses his lips against her skin and gently kisses the scars on her back, his hands cupping the crest of her hip and waist. Balsa stirs, then turns, burrowing against him.

He has come to understand that Balsa doesn't need protection. She needs someone to heal her, and he knows that's what makes her feel safe. "You shouldn't feel so inadequate," Balsa said once, but at that time Tanda didn't believe her. I was so insecure, Tanda thinks. He hitches Balsa close, pressing his face into her hair.

Chagum will be happy, Tanda thinks. He presses his palm against Balsa's belly, then nuzzles the space behind Balsa's ear.

xXx

.

The last time he had seen Balsa cry, it was at Jiguro's deathbed, clutching his hand and closing her eyes.

Now, Balsa cries silently as she holds their child for the first time. The sight of it makes Tanda smile.

A/N: I've never read the books, so I don't know how they end up together at the end. I was just craving some shippy sappy Tanda/Balsa fic, so there :)