Thinking of you, an inuyasha fanfic

Kagome got up that morning at six am, before InuYasha woke up. She looked out the window in her second story bed room of her townhouse. The weather channel had promised rain all day and it didn't disappoint. Already, the dreary clouds were drizzling steady sheets of rain.

She left the room quietly, careful not to wake her boyfriend. She went to the bathroom down the hall and turned the shower on as hot as it would go. The woman quickly stripped of her nightgown and stepped in the stall. Though scalding, her body adjusted quickly to the sizzling water. She washed her black hair with coconut shampoo. His favorite.

Even through two closed doors and over running water, she could hear InuYasha snoring. He never did that. She stepped out of the shower, toweling off long legs and slender waist with the old navy blue towel. This was his. InuYasha snorted in his sleep. Kagome could see in her mind him rolling over in her king sized bed taking up the whole mattress with his sprawled out limbs. He never did that, either.

The girl shook her head forcing the thoughts out of her head. Comparisons were easy after having a taste of perfection. She'd picked carefully when choosing her love. He was like the perfect red apple on tree and yet, she'd still got the seed. He had been like an Indian summer in the middle of winter or a surprise center in her favorite candy. InuYasha, on the other hand, was like winter in summer and finding vegetables in your chocolate. He'd been a gentle lover. InuYasha liked his sex rough and loud. With him, she'd never had to fake. With InuYasha, every day was acting.

She wrapped her long hair up without blow drying it, afraid the sound would wake the sleeping hanyo, putting it up in a messy bun. InuYasha didn't know where she was going and she'd rather him not know.

Kagome put on foundation and powder, though her face was already smooth. His skin was smooth too. She skipped mascara and eyeliner, knowing the rain would wash it away.

Next she put on her black knee-length scoop next dress. She zipped up the back and tied the sash behind her, putting it into a bow. She hooked the strap of her heels around her ankle.

Kagome hesitated before opening the cupboard and digging in the back. She paused, making sure she could hear InuYasha still snoring. It was only six forty-five and the hanyo wouldn't be up for at least another hour and a half but she didn't want to risk it. She took the satin ring box out and slipped the diamond band on her left ring finger.

Kagome collapsed onto the toilet seat, holding her head in her hand. Sobs wracked her body. You said move on, where do I go? She thought. He'd left for the war and told her 'there are plenty of fish in the water.' So she'd tested the waters and stumbled upon InuYasha. But how do you ever get better when you've had the best? Every time InuYasha kissed her, she tasted his lips. InuYasha would sleep with her and Kagome would feel disgusted with herself.

She forced herself out the bathroom. She scrawled a note to InuYasha:

Be back later.

Love Kagome.

She didn't make it any longer because InuYasha's focus wouldn't last longer than four words.

She ate toast his peanut butter. You ate this every morning. With black coffee. But I never got the taste for it. While wearing this. She fingered the white robe with a red design draped around her shoulders.

She left the house and got in her car, backing out the driveway, putting her windshield wipers on high.

The drive felt longer every year. It was only across town but somehow it seemed like every time, some force because stronger, telling her to turn around. Sometimes she did but she'd always end up there.

She parked on the gravel road. She shut off the car and put her hood up against the rain. She found the headstone quickly and knelt down on the muddy dirt, not even caring about her dress getting dirty.

Her long fingers outlined first his name and then the crescent moon.

"I miss you," she said.

She allowed herself to break down. She hugged the tombstone, pressing her face against the wet marble. "What would it be like if you were spending the night instead of him?" she cried. "I want to get lost in your eyes, not his. I always think of you when I'm with him. Always. "

Burst in the door and take me away, she thought. Take me away from him. Take me away from this mistake.

"I still love you, Sesshomaru."

Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one, I still got the seed

You said move on, where do I go?
I guess second best is all I will know

'Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
Thinking of you, what you would do
If you were the one who was spending the night
(Spending the night, spending the night)
Oh, I wish that I was looking into your eyes

You're like an Indian Summer in the middle of winter
Like a hard candy with a surprise center
How do I get better once I've had the best?
You said there's tons of fish in the water, so the waters I will test

He kissed my lips, I taste your mouth, oh!
(Taste your mouth)
He pulled me in, I was disgusted with myself

You're the best, and yes, I do regret
How I could let myself let you go
Now, now the lesson's learned
I touched it, I was burned
Oh, I think you should know!

Oh, won't you walk through?
And bust in the door and take me away?
Oh, no more mistakes
'Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay, stay