Chapter 1

A Hung-over Call

Albus Dumbledore woke up sprawled spread eagle on the floor in his office. He looked up and noticed he wasn't alone. Barty Crouch Sr. and Ludo Bagman were standing over him. Albus was hoping he remembered to wear and/or keep on his underwear last night.

"Gentlemen, what can I do for you this morning?" Albus asked.

"It's afternoon Albus. And for starters, you can cover your willy." said Barty. Damn, guess no underwear. Thought Albus. "And as soon as you do that, we can get this business of contacting the Potter boy over with." Albus had hoped it had all been a bad dream. But it hadn't. Harry was going to have to come to Hogwarts.

Albus sat up and regretted it instantly. His head felt like it was split open and rats had had an orgy in his skull the night before. Will this damn room quit spinning already.

It took a couple of minutes, but Albus made it over to his desk and opened a drawer. He pulled out a wooden box.

"What you gentlemen are probably unaware of, is that young Harry placed an enchantment on himself a number of years ago that prevent owls from finding him. However, he gave me a way of getting in contact with him anytime I wish."

"That's great to hear!" exclaimed Ludo Bagman. The first thing the lump said since entering the office. "Let's get in contact with Harry and get him over here right away!" Ludo was very excited about the idea of Harry Potter coming to Hogwarts. He was planning on wagering on Harry with the Goblins. He was in for a surprise on that front.

Albus opened the box as he bent over and emptied his stomach under his desk. In side was a glowing green butt plug. It glowed like the killing curse, and looked just as lethal. "Harry wanted to make sure people only contact him when it was really important. This device allows for instant voice communication with Harry no matter where he is. You just have to keep it…well, I'm sure you can imagine."

"Albus, knowing you, you contact the boy daily." Barty gave Albus a smirk and knowing look. Albus blew a kiss at Barty, with vomit all over his beard.

"Before I contact Harry, I need to know how far the Ministry is going to go to make sure Mr. Potter participates in this tournament?"

"What do you mean? His name came out of the Goblet of Fire. The consequences of going against such an artifact should be reason enough for the boy to come." said Crouch.

"With any other person, I would agree. But in the case of Harry Potter…..he has a history of breaking or modifying the enchantments on objects more powerful then the Goblet of Fire. I believe that if Harry doesn't want to participate, he will just break the enchantment on the Goblet. This will of course destroy the Goblet. No gentlemen, you are going to have to make it worth it to him."

"Give him whatever it takes Albus. We've had enough problems with getting this thing going. Just get the boy here." said Barty Crouch.

Albus took the green butt plug and inserted it.

"Harry? Can you hear me?" Pause. "No, I'm not Satan." Another Pause. "Harry, it's Albus. And I'm almost as hung over as you are. You are behind me in hours, that's all." Albus sat and listened for a couple of seconds. "Harry, I'm sorry to inform you that your name came out of the Goblet of Fire last night." Albus opened a drawer and started to look for something as he listened for a moment. "It means that it wants you to compete in the Tri Wizard Tournament." Pause. "No, the Ministry isn't high. That explanation would be too easy." Albus was quite again as he pulled out a vial from his draw and drank it. "Ok. I can do that. See you then Harry." Albus pulled the butt plug out and handed it to a house elf to go wash it again.

"Well gentlemen, good news." Albus clapped his hands together. "My brother's hangover cure works."

"Good for you!" said Ludo. "What about Harry?"

"He said that he was too hung-over to talk. He will be at the Bird Cage in Miami Florida in fifteen hours. We are to meet with him there, and he will talk to us about competing."

"But he didn't say he would?" asked Crouch.

"He didn't say he wouldn't either. Now, if you will excuse me gentlemen, my body is old and the bathroom is calling me. I believe we all have work to do before we cross the pond."

A/N: By popular demand. Thoughts?

This is going to be a multi crossover story centered around a Super!Harry type character. But if you've read any of my stories, I don't go the usual route with super characters.