SUNDAY NIGHT

It's a split second decision to stop, but he needs to say something. He needs to let her know that he does still love her, that he still wants so badly to marry her. He can't let her go without her knowing that he wants another chance.

He can't let her go at all.

She doesn't want to talk. Doesn't want to stay.

But he wants her to. Needs her to. Because he doesn't how what to say, what is wrong exactly.

Luckily, she saves him.

"Do you know what I heard when you said you were going to Africa?"

-:-:-

He's not saying anything, and the silence is too uncomfortable. She knows she shouldn't break her promise to Hyde, knows that the thin veil of using his relationship with Jackie as leverage is gone. Here in the darkness with Eric, it's no longer that easy to say she has nothing to say.

"Do you know what I heard when you said you were going to Africa?"

He shakes his head jerkily.

"I heard that my opinion didn't matter. You were going to leave no matter what, and what I wanted or thought wouldn't change your mind."

She's amazed her voice is calm. Now that she's letting these things out, she feels like screaming.

"Don't get me wrong—if that's what you really wanted, then of course I'd want you to go. But I hated that you made that decision without talking to me. Did you even think about us?"

He whispers, "I didn't think we would be a problem."

She ignores him. "When you dumped me, I... I thought that was the reason you left. I thought that you leaving was just an excuse for you to leave me."

"That's not true, Donna!"

But she can't stop talking. "All I could wonder was 'what did I do wrong?' I wanted to marry you. I'm not the one who walked out on our wedding. I never wanted to break up with you. It's never crossed my mind. Yeah, I was worried about getting married, but it was to you, and that would have been wonderful." She's talking fast now, barely stopping to breathe, the words running together from a place that held it back too long. "I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, and you toss me away without a backward glance. You're the one that gave me the promise ring, you're the one that wanted to hear that we'd be together forever. And now that I feel that, you've walked away!" She kicks out, and her toes hit the panel. She cringes, but the pain calms her down. "You know how many nights I stayed awake and wondered if that was it? If me saying I wasn't as sure as you were three years ago made you want to leave? Because I am sure. I love you and it's painful to think that you won't be the one I wake up next to every morning.

"And you know what else? You didn't even call me. I mean, I wish you could have told me face to face, but a phone call...I wanted to scream at you, and you didn't even have the courtesy to give me that. I did it in private every single night. Every single night I yelled at your picture. And then...then I cried myself to sleep." She wipes a few tears as they fall. "Maybe it's a little self-centered of me to think that I was the reason you left. I know I'm not the only person you have. But... I just... I wanted you to stay. I wanted... I needed you to just talk to me. And—and not dump me." She covers her face with her hand and her voice is barely audible as she continues. "I want so badly to hate you, Eric, but it's just not possible. I love you, more than anything. And if—if you want... to fix this... to be with me..."

"I do." She hears his sigh and feels his fingers on her face. He turns her head so she's facing him. "Look, you were the reason I left but not like that. I wanted to give you everything you wanted. I wanted you to have the life you wanted. Teachers... they're everywhere, aren't they? I could get a job no matter where you wanted to go. I would never have to be without you, and you wouldn't have to give up your dreams. I didn't want to go so far away, but I didn't see any other options.

"When I left, I thought we'd just stay in contact and I'd come back and we'd go to college like planned. And I broke up with you...because I didn't want you to wait for me. I didn't want you to feel tied down. I thought you could start your life, and if I didn't have a place in it when I came back... Well, I would have died, but if that's what you wanted..."

His voice breaks. "Donna, it was my fault with the promise ring. I shouldn't have tried to push you. But that doesn't mean anything anymore. And I'm sorry that I walked out on our wedding. I couldn't let you settle for Point Place when you could anything you wanted. Not for me."

"You don't get it. I could be the first female president or a CEO or a famous author and you know what? It wouldn't mean a single thing without you."

"That's why I left. So we could both have what we wanted."

Silence again. She feels a little better but she's far from relieved.

"And Donna?"

"Yes?"

"I love you."

Relief. That's just what she needed. She breaks down in tears and feels his arms wrap tightly around her.

It feels like hours before she stops crying. Calmer, she pulls away from him and wipes her tears away. "I hate myself for needing you as badly as I do."

"I hate myself for hurting you as badly as I did."

They stare into each other's eyes for a few moments before a sheepish grin rises on his face. "I have a confession to make. I stole some papers you wrote on fear. I wouldn't have gathered the courage to talk to you. I didn't want you to go back without you knowing that I want nothing more than to be with you."

"You still didn't gather the courage to talk to me until I talked."

He grins. "Yeah, well. I would have said something eventually." The grin fades some. "I couldn't let you leave with things like this."

"I'm glad."

She gives him a huge kiss.

It's both amazing and frightening how easily passion sweeps them. Within seconds they are pressed against each other in desperation, trying to get as close as possible.

It's completely different from a few days ago. Their love making is just that, soft and sweet and tender, and when it's over, she lays her head on his chest in the back of the car, and he smiles down at her.

"I wish you didn't have to go."

"I'll be back next weekend."

"I know, but it's just not the same."

"Well, I can't live in Point Place."

"I don't know. Maybe you could."

She lifts herself up some. "It's a three hour drive."

"Well, when is your first class?"

She laughs disbelievingly. "You're serious?"

"Yeah. When?"

"Ten."

"I can do that."

"You?"

"I could drive you every morning and either stay there or come back and pick you up..."

She laughs again and sits up, burying her face in her hands. "I can't believe you're actually suggesting this. Eric, it's a three hour drive. We'd have to get up at six-thirty to get ready. I'd be tired in class."

"You could sleep on the ride over," he suggests as he sits up too. His face falls slightly. "Yeah, you're right. It'd be too hard."

"I'll be back on weekends," she soothes. "It's been like that for the last two months."

"Yeah but it was just sex for the last two months. I could find that anywhere."

The comment is off-hand, she knows, but she still can't stop the jealousy and hurt that immediately well up. She's never wanted anyone else to touch her, but she wonders if it's right to have expected the same from Eric. Sex has always been much more important to him than to her. Maybe it was wrong to assume, through their two breakups, that he had remained celibate. Instantly, she's miserable and annoyed, wondering who else touched her Eric.

It must show on her face, because he's frowning thoughtfully. "What's wrong?" His expression changes. "I stuck my foot in my mouth again, didn't I? I didn't mean that... I've never... You're the only one I've ever been with, Donna. Besides, it's never been just sex with us."

"Really?"

-:-:-

He hates that her voice is so small and hopeful, a tone he's never heard from her. And he hates that it's his fault. How did she go from so strong to so scared? "Really." He gives her a kiss. "You're the only one I've ever wanted to be with." There's a brief pause while he gathers some courage. "Have you ever..."

"No."

"Not with Casey Kelso? Or that guy Hyde hired?"

"No."

"Seriously?" He finds that hard to believe. He didn't know Randy but he knew Casey Kelso had been around the block before, and seduction was his game. Girls just fell at his feet.

"I tried to, but it felt weird. They'd get to second base, and I'd just feel dirty and not in a good way."

He laughs quietly and happily. "What makes you feel dirty in a good way?"

"All the things you do to me."

It's a long time before they pull apart again, sated and flushed. Both are wearing big smiles as they regretfully tug their clothes back on.

"What time is it?"

Eric squints at his watch as he turns the key in the ignition. It's too dark to read it, but he does some quick calculating. "It's got to be past eleven." He glances at the clock on the car. 11:23. "I'm getting hungry."

"I think there's a diner up a little ways that's open twenty four seven."

-::-::-

They gorge on pancakes and hot chocolate, and when they're getting ready to leave, he begins to stall, not at all eager to part with her now that they've made up.

She laughs and stands. "I need to go back eventually, Eric."

He follows her out, feeling a little forlorn. "I know."

They settle into the car and he takes his time.

"Eric."

"Oh, fine." He pulls out of the parking lot and back onto the highway.

"Okay. How about this? I only have one class tomorrow—the professor cancelled my second because he wanted an extra day off. So why don't you come around... one? We'll go out to lunch."

"What about the rest of the week?"

"We'll work something out." She laughs quietly. "I can't believe you're so desperate that you're willing to drive three hours just to see me."

"I am not desperate! I just really want to spend as much time as possible with you. I just... I need you, Donna."

There's no response for the longest time, but when she finally speaks, it's a soft whisper, "I need you too, Eric."

Author's Note: Congratulations! You made it to the end. That's farther than I made it. I think I gave up at this point. Can't you tell? You know what I just realised? I'm starting to believe Point Place is real. I've been watching way too much of this show. Anyway, drop me a line. Please and thank you! (Feel free to tell me this story's utter crap—I know it). I'll (hopefully) update Dirty Surprise in a few days. Peace out.