The night air was a bit chilly. I really wanted my jacket, but his eyes were saying there was no time for frivolous things like my comfort.
It was a full moon too, and I wondered briefly where Sam was off too. And I also thought it had to be against nature for someone to look so beautiful in the moonlight.
Like a very angry angel.
"You've kept away from me." it was more of a statement than a question. I shrugged my shoulders helplessly.
"Been busy." He quirked a brow in my direction.
"I couldn't enter your home." his eyes were narrowed. Accusing. I was feeling his anger roll off in waves, and the blood bond wasn't really helping. I thought I sensed a touch of desperation, and a dose of sadness.
I scratched my head a bit shyly.
"You noticed that did you?"
"Sookie!" I sighed.
"I needed time to think." I felt the truth would be best.
"So you kept me away, for a month, without my consent." he snorted. "And you called me high-handed."
My lips twitched at the edges. I told myself we would conduct this like adults, no laughing. No smiling. But he could sense my levity, and it was making him angrier.
"Um, I'm sorry..." I couldn't keep the question out my voice. He was furious. To give him credit, he was containing it pretty well. He crossed his arms across his chest, and adverted his eyes. It looked suspiciously like he was sulking.
It was really getting cold.
"Do you want to conduct this elsewhere?" I asked slowly. I rubbed my hands up my frozen arms. I had goosebumps and was beginning to shiver.
It was like talking to a wall.
"Ok, what do you want me to say," I threw up my arms in exasperation. His mood was starting to rub off a smidgen, and I focused all my annoyance towards him. "I'm sorry I didn't say anything, but I had a lot to think about."
"You didn't keep others out," his voice could make ice shiver.
"Others?" I thought about Pam coming over to check on me. She told me Eric was pissed, even though I pretty much figured that out myself. We watched Forgetting Sarah Marshall. She liked the inclusion of Dracula and laughed like hell at the ending.
Sam had stopped by for dinner last week. He was always more friendly when a vampire wasn't sharing my bed.
Bubba wandered over to tell me he was heading up to Virginia for a little while. He was polite enough to hide the cat he caught behind his back. I brushed against its fur when I gave him a hug, and I accidentally wiped some of the blood on my night shirt...much to my disgust.
And then there was...
Oh.
OH.
I narrowed my eyes. "Eric," I started coldly, his eyes found mine again and he jutted out his chin. He looked like a five year old, and it really wasn't funny anymore.
"Is this about Bill?" I asked. I crossed my own arms. A small party exited the bar, clumsy with drunkenness. A very, very stupid and very, very drunk couple stumbled over. The girl latched on to Eric's unmoving arms. She was barely legal, blonde, and dense, but the slight jealousy bubbled up anyway. The guy was eying me, but he was a little wiser to the situation he walked into.
Once Eric turned his cold eyes on them, they skittered away, sadly taking a bit of my anger with them.
We showed down again, and I realized then, with his eyes boring into mine, that I had really missed him. I hadn't realized it in my desire for distance. I remembered, so fluidly, like I had slipped into my own mind. I saw us together and the intensity in his eyes. The perfect way our bodies fit together. The raw emotion he pulled from me. I almost choked on all the suppressed emotion.
The silence was stifling.
I wondered how I'd gotten there, feelings of love showing up for Eric. My feelings for Bill had returned, and I'd subconsciously forgiven him all his indiscretions. I didn't know where that put us, but during all his visits, it had been friendly, but never like it used to be. I didn't want to jump his bones so to speak. I was just glad to have him back.
Eric was watching me. And it was doing little things to me.
"I'm not sleeping with Bill."
His features softened a little.
"I could have banned him from you," he stated. He wanted his brownie points, I had to fight another smile.
"But you didn't. I'm grateful," he stiffened and I added, "Bill is a good friend." Stress on the friend part. Of course he could just take a whiff and see I hadn't gotten any since I cut him off. And the effects of his blood in my system hadn't let up yet, so it wasn't like I didn't want it. I just wanted it from one person.
"What do you want from me Sookie?" we had this discussion before. I still didn't know. So I shrugged. We had started to get somewhere, but his face closed off again.
"Ok. What do you want in a...boyfriend," he was hesitant to use the word. Eric and boyfriend didn't really go together.
I had actually thought about it. Amelia slipped out of her grief stricken haze with a single minded mission. Operation fix roomie's love life. We had sort of compiled a list.
"I," I was starting to feel shy about our open surroundings. Really, anyone could be listening. He rolled his hand in that, let's go I'm waiting motion and I rolled my eyes in return. "I want to come first." He quirked an eyebrow.
"I never pegged you as a selfish woman, Sookie," a bit of amusement had seeped into his voice. There was a lewd edge as well, and it took me a second to realize the double entendre (yesterday's word of the day). I scowled, but it lacked umph.
"A girl has to be every now and then," I answered frostily. A ghost of a smile softened his face again, and a wave of calm relaxed me. I tapped my chin thoughtfully, "Maybe it is a bit selfish, but I'll share everything I have (and that was mostly true), but I don't want to share my guy. With anything," that sounded more than a bit selfish to my own ears. But it was true.
"Ok," he was starting to look indulgent.
"I want to feel safe," without knowing it I was edging closer to him, "I'm sick of ex girlfriends and things being kept from me," ok so I was drifting from the list a little.
"I'm sick of not having a say in what goes on in my life," he smiled faintly at this, "I want to be boring, and normal," he was within arms reach now.
"I want to share my life with someone," he was glowing a little more brightly than I was used to.
"I want to talk about my day and be heard. I want to go dancing and get a puppy," I was getting wistful, so I decided that was a good place to stop. I wondered, since I was so close, if Eric would just go on and forgive me and hold me. I really wanted to be held.
"You want," his eyes looked distant.
"Bill."
My mouth fell open.
"What?" it came out as more of a croak than a screech.
"The guy you want," he paused for effect, "is Bill." I shook my head. My ponytail slapped against my cheek.
"That's not what I said,"
Eric was turning to stone again. "Not in those words."
"Not at all," Why was I defensive?
"So you don't?" my brows furrowed together.
"Didn't we just settle this?"
"No."
"Eric, I'm not sleeping with Bill,"
"Do you want to?"
"No," I think a bit of outrage bled into my voice.
"Do you want to sleep with me?"
"Not now," I grumbled put out.
He smiled, but it was completely without humor.
"He's not tied to important business. He doesn't have anyone to look after but himself," he paused and looked as thoughtful as a vampire can look, "He doesn't have many enemies, he can protect you. And he's...not as savage as most. He won't ask you to do anything you don't want to do, and he learned his lesson when he lost you the first time," he shrugged. "He's the logical choice."
I snorted although he was right. "Since when do you make logical choices?"
"I make them all the time." Hello Mr. Snooty.
I had to get out of my snit quickly, because he was descending upon me. The look in his eyes was a look I hadn't seen before. I wanted to call it hurt, but it didn't make a lot of sense. So it scared the ever living out of me and I took two steps back every time he took one forward.
He still ended up pinning me to my car.
"I want you," his teeth were bared. "More than I've ever wanted almost anything else," he was right in my face. Things were heating up and leaking. Things he was close enough to feel if he'd get off the emotional roller coaster.
"Ok," it came out as a whisper. My eyes wouldn't stay on his eyes, it had REALLY been too long.
"But you need to choose."
"Oh, boy,"
"Now." Ah, saved by the arrogance. I dipped from under his arms. He didn't move, head hanging, fists clenched in anger.
"I am not your lackey Eric Northman, not by a long shot. The only thing I have to choose is what I'm wearing to bed tonight."
"So I'm to be led on like a dog on a leash?"
I lifted my chin, "Call it what you want." He turned painfully slowly. A long moment passed between us.
"Fine." he growled. It shocked me out of my pride play.
"What?"
"Fine!" he barked out a little longer. "I'll wait."
Woo hoo. This was a night for surprises.
He kissed me then, so fast I couldn't react but in the natural way. I kissed him back, with a whole months worth of pent up lust and wanting. Fingers wandered, things came undone, and I managed to get us halfway in the car for a little bit of privacy.
I was floating on a cloud somewhere when I realized he was setting me to rights. His hair was a bit tousled but he looked immaculate otherwise.
"Know this, lover," his voice was deep and the emotions behind them were so complex I couldn't begin to pick them apart. "My feelings for you have only deepened since our first time together," that barely penetrated the fog in my head.
"You may be conflicted," he gave me a smile then, a radiant, honest, somewhat tortured smile, "but I'm still yours."
And then he was gone.
When I got home there was a leash hanging from my door knob. On my bed, a tiny golden retriever wagged his tail.
I don't know how many stories like this is out there but I've had it lying around for a while so here ya go! Thanks for reading!