TITLE: "The List"

AUTHOR: A.M. Glass

Ratings: (US) K (UK) U (AUS) G

Copyright: November. 3rd, 1999.

Slight Revision: January 27th, 2005.

Spoilers: Yep, and there are plenty of them for "Bad Beer."

Disclaimer: Joss Whedon, Fox Studios, Mutant Enemy, et al, have something to do with "Buffy the Vampire Slayer". No copyright infringement is intended or inferred. The story along with any/all original characters are the sole property of the author and can not be used without expressed permission first.

Author's Disclaimer: Let's face it, I don't own BTVS or any of the characters, back story, etc. I'm not making a cent from it - if I did, I'd buy a new computer and some other things. The story; along with any original characters are mine.

Author's Note: Willow's perspective on the whole night.

Second Author's Note: It's Jan. 23rd, 2006 and I've taken a few minutes to tweak the story. Hopefully it'll read better.

Buffy...

Well, what was left of her, knew a few things to be true.

One: Beer was good.

Two: Beer was foamy.

Three: Parker... Bad.

Four: Boy smell good.

And

Five: Fire bad.

A fitting place to end her list I thought.

Well... I was wrong.

I didn't find out about this so-called list from Buffy herself, mind you. She was still, what did Xander call her?

Oh yes, he called her - "Cave-Slayer"

She was still the Cave Slayer.

And she really wasn't much of a conversationalist at the time.

Xander took it upon himself to tell me about Buffy's esoteric list and I totally agreed about Parker, eww.

Anyway that was a few hours ago, before I learned that something, or rather someone was missing from it.

Me.

Willow Rosenberg.

I found out much later; from one of the two girls that had been trapped with me in the "Grotto" during the fire that Buffy had apparently seen me through the flames and looked around for something to help me.

She spotted a fire extinguisher - she picked it up...

And threw it into the flames.

At least her heart was in the right place.

When that didn't work, she jumped through the flames and headed straight for me.

Of course, the last thing I remember clearly before coming to outside, was telling Parker how gullible did he think I was? This was after he tried to cast that spell that seemed to work for others, unfortunately Buffy included.

I would have given anything to spare her the pain she went through because of him.

Anyway, I know I told him some other stuff, but that part's... kind of fuzzy.

I mean why wouldn't it be?

I was conked on the head with a tree branch. It's bound to play havoc with my brain.

We: being Giles, Xander and I watched as Buffy conked Parker on his head. We didn't do anything to stop her - he deserved it.

He did.

We headed back to the dorm room Buffy and I shared.

Xander informed us that Buffy would be all right in a day...

Or two.

I promised Giles I would call right away if she started to act like a female version of Captain Caveman...

He didn't get it, but, that's okay.

"Will-low..."

I turned around, to see Buffy, staring at me. I walked over to her very slowly. I didn't want to frighten her or myself for that matter. "Yeah Buff?" I really hoped she could understand me.

"Will-low... safe?" she asked cocking her head to the side.

"I'm safe," I replied.

She hopped off the bed and met me half way. "Will-low... safe?"

"Yes... Will-low safe."

She smiled the biggest smile I'd seen from her in days. "Will-low... good," she grunted, nodding her head up and down. Then she surprised me by embracing me, and uttering, "Will-low... good," over and over again, while patting me on the head... kinda hard.

"Yes... Will-low good... Buffy good. Buffy hurting Will-low," I told her. I really didn't want too but my head started pounding again. I wished I hadn't said anything. She quickly let me go, and I almost cried. The look on her face made me want to cut my tongue out... and... and feed it to some... some demon or something. 'Bad Willow... Bad Willow.'

"Buffy... bad?" she asked in such a small voice.

"No! NO! Buffy good... Buffy good, Will-low sorry," I only hoped she knew how sorry I was.

"Will-low saw-ree?"

"Yes... Will-low very sorry."

That's when the list changed.

She just looked at me and said: "Will-low good, Will-low safe... beer good... beer foam-me... Parker... Bad... boy smell good... fire bad."

I had made it to the top of Buffy's list, and let me tell you something; it's not a bad place to be.

The End.