Summary: Kakashi gets a little insight into his past, present, and future via the joys of fatherhood.

Disclaimer - If I owned Naruto there would be a lot less fighting, and a lot more kissing. Just saying.

On Crayon Contracts

Kakashi suddenly finds himself grateful, over 15 years after the fact, that Sakura's father had not been alive when they had started seeing one another. Because right now he's contemplating all the many, many, many ways he can kill the jounin who's flirting with his 14-year-old daughter.

Logically Kakashi knows that Sumire doesn't look or act 14.

Logically he knows that the man probably has no idea that the girl he's casually chatting up is underage as well as 10 years his junior.

Logically Kakashi knows the kid probably doesn't realize that she carries the family name Hatake.

But logic and Kakashi parted ways about the time he rounded the corner and saw said jounin standing under the noodle shop's noren and leaning towards Sumire with a jaunty smile and very familiar male interest in his eyes; and right now all Kakashi wants to do is turn the younger shinobi into something that has to be in the hospital a really long fucking time. He restrains himself, not for altruistic reasons, but because he knows that beating the shithead within an inch of his life would land him under Sakura's jurisdiction. And then Kakashi would "have some explaining to do". Sakura was possibly even more protective of their children than he was, but that wouldn't stop her from beating the living grunt out of him if she knew that he'd been randomly picking on boys just because they were talking to his daughter.

So, Kakashi is grateful that Sakura's father was not alive when they started seeing each other because right now he has a sudden uncomfortable perspective on being a father and seeing an older man, an experienced man, wooing his baby girl.

He doesn't consciously remember moving, but suddenly he's standing behind Sumire and glaring at the suave asshole who thinks he can just go round chatting up any young woman that suits his fancy.

The younger man straightens and takes an instinctive step back.

By the time Sumire swivels on her stool what's visible of Kakashi's face is all smiles.

"Hey there Mire-chan, did you save me a seat?" She gives him that sweet smile that she reserves just for him (and he intends to keep that smile for himself for the next 30 years or so).

"Of course daddy."

Kakashi is pleased to see the man turn an interesting shade of green as his eyes go huge and frightened. Kakashi may be fast closing in on his 50th birthday but he still scares the piss out of ninja decades younger than himself.

As it should be, Kakashi thinks in satisfaction.

Sumire turns back to her initial companion and Kakashi's face drops back into a hard scowl.

The boy doesn't move his eyes from the more dangerous of the two and makes a sound that's a cross between a whimper and nervous laughter, "Ka…Ka…Kakashi-san! Sir, I didn't know…" he trails off and his eyes dart nervously to Sumire who is staring at him with patient puzzlement, "…no wonder Sumire-san is so good at ninjutsu! I was just asking her to give me some pointers."

"Hmm, oh yes. She's very talented," Kakashi ruffles her hair, and she swats playfully at his hand, "Feel free to tell all your friends how proud I am of my baby girl!" He crinkles his eye at the young man in a way that usually sends enemies fleeing for cover because the expression tends to precede copious amounts of bloodshed and violence. The little bastard nods quickly in understanding at the unspoken warning, swallowing visibly.

"Well, tou-san and I are supposed to have lunch together. It was nice talking to you Kureno-sempai." Sumire chirps, seemingly oblivious to the tension between the men standing on either side of her.

'Kureno' bows briefly, without taking his eyes from Kakashi, turns and then practically sprints down the street.

Kakashi grudgingly gives the little shit credit for having the balls to stay as long as he did but also makes a mental note to make sure Kureno-whatever-his-name-is finds himself on a long term mission somewhere dangerous, unpleasant, and far from Konoha. After all, what was the point of having a former student as the Hokage if you couldn't take advantage of it?

Sumire sighs, staring after the retreating jounin. "Was that fun for you?" she asks wryly, turning to meet his eye. Oh yeah, she looks scarily like her mother before the chakra-charged fists start flying. His little girl isn't stupid, "Or should we track down Gai-ojisan so you can continue having some sort of manly pissing contest."

"I'm sure, I don't know what you're talking about," Kakashi says airily; seating himself and nodding at the waitress as she sets a bowl of noodles in front of him.

"Really dad, I appreciate the help getting rid of that one irritating guy, but you laid it on a little thick. I'm going to be like a dating pariah now."

"Good." The consequences of his little intimidation routine were getting better and better.

She props her chin on her hand and stares pointedly at him,"Yeah, unless you ever want grandbabies to spoil."

Kakashi stills in contemplation, chopsticks poised above his bowl. Having children had been a revelation for him. And he is now torn between the thought of grandchildren to spoil, which was a very sweet thought, and the thought of what had to happen for grandchildren to come about.

There is another beat of silence, then "Haine can have kids."

"Isn't that a little unfair?" her eyes flash the same way her mother's do when he'd just said something that is going to land him on the couch for the night, "My brother is allowed to have sex, but I'm not?"

"We can talk about it later." Kakashi gives a little wave to several restaurant patrons who have started following the audible exchange with interest.

Sumire watches him eat for a moment, a smirk growing as she waits until she knows he'll have a mouthful of noodles. Then she drops the bomb.

"It doesn't matter in regards to Konoha ninja anyway. I told Sabaku no Akane that I would marry him when I was about five years old. We wrote up a contract in crayon and everything. Considering our family's close ties with the Hokage, breaking the engagement would be an international scandal."

As Kakashi chokes - ramen going up his nose and down his windpipe at the same time -he thinks for a moment that maybe that Kureno kid wasn't so bad.

Because there is no way his intimidation tactics will ever work on the Kazekage's oldest son.

-END-

*Peace Y'all*