Disclaimer: I do not own anything.

WARNING: This story contains Shonen Ai / Yaoi !

~~ 1. I Need To Escape ~~

~~ 28. August, Night ~~

'They do it again. Can't they do it when I am not around?'

Ryoma curled himself up in his bed and pulled Karupin closer to his chest. He snuggled his nose in the warm fur and enjoyed the purrs from his little cat. His parents were fighting because of him again. His secret had been showed up and had been seen by them once more. They were screaming at him for doing it but he couldn't help.

It wasn't the first time that it had happened. Five years ago, the boy had showed himself to his best friend in America and Ryoma had never felt so broken after his solution. As his friend saw what a monster he was, he had avoided him, had ignored him and had even fought against him with his new friends. The time, when his secret had been seen, was in the middle of the night as his parents came down the stairs. Someone had picked up a fight with him and he couldn't control himself anymore. He turned into the monster and hospitalized the person with his own body. With his own hands. Would he ever find someone who could be with him even after he showed the person his real self? Would he ever learn how to control this 'thing' inside of him?

"You let him go outside alone, in the middle of the night and now look what he had done! How could you…." Rinko hissed loudly from the room next to Ryoma's.

'I don't want to hear it! Why are they so hurt? Why? Shouldn't it be me to be hurt? I can't stand it anymore!'

The dark emerald-haired boy was angry, hurt, confused and mostly alone. His parents had abandoned him after they had seen his secret for the first time. As if they thought he would get along by himself as a child and they could do everything they wanted. Even Nanjiroh ignored him and had stopped to play tennis against his son. The women were more important, so at least felt it for the boy. Even then, Ryoma had never cried. If his parents didn't want and abandon him, he would let them do it. He couldn't blame them; it was him who brought the trouble, it was him who killed this woman back then with his hands. He would leave the house on his own free will. He had planned it yesterday night and his bag was ready to take. The cat-like boy would run away. He could understand why everyone hated him or why they were so scared of him but what all the people didn't know was that he would only attack someone if the stranger caused emotional danger.

'Why me? What have I done to deserve this? Why must it be me who has such a monster in the body?'

It hurt to see how humans could leave each other because they saw the true person, someone who wasn't the human as they thought. How can you love someone if you only see hate in your own family? How can you trust someone if you know that they can break it every minute? How can you tell someone a secret if you know he will split it out someday? Karupin meowed and licked his master's cheek, a little gesture to cheer him up. Ryoma smiled a bitter smile.

"Yeah, I shouldn't think so depressed. It'll only make everything worse! Thanks, Karupin." Something crashed in his parent's room and the screams and yells started anew. Eight years was it like this already. The Himalayan cat was surprised by the loud sound and hid under his master's pyjama-shirt. "It's alright Karupin. We'll leave the house soon. I promise you, we'll find a nice place, a new home. You'll never leave me, right? You're the only one who will always stay with me." Ryoma pressed his body in an embryo position, pulled the thin blanket tighter over his body, put his headsets in his ears and made the loud music flow into him - to block every noise out of his mind. His parents stood right in front of his room as they screamed, hit and pushed one another.

"Is it so hard to take care of your damn son for a few hours? I have no nerve for it! I never wanted a monster like him! We had agreed you would take care of him!" Rinko shouted at her still-husband.

"He is fifteen, he is old enough to take care of himself; he needs to learn what it means to stand on his own two feet!" It went on like this all night long. The parents didn't care, if their son had heard every word or not. Echizen Ryoma felt pain when his own family didn't want him, didn't need him, nevertheless, not single tear welled out of his eyes.

'You don't want me? You push me away because you don't like me anymore? Do you want to punish me because I'm myself?'

Syusuke sat restless on the edge of the stairs, his knees pressed against his chest with his elbows resting on them and his hands clenching his hair with his icy-blue eyes wide open. His lips were full of blood as he had bitten too hard on them. The house was quiet and the mood was filled with sadness, disbelief and anger. The only light burnt in the kitchen, the rest of the house lay in darkness. His family had gotten a report from the neighbours that he, Fuji Syusuke, should have raped a girl.

His family were discussing what they should do with him; they hadn't even listened once to his excuse - to the truth. He could hear every word of his mother and father, how they were disappointed at him and how his older sister Yumiko was disgusted by him. The Fuji-family was never a failure and that her fiancé had heard about her brother being a rapist, and that he thought about the marriage once more, wasn't very helpful either. His family hadn't listened to him what he had to say. They screamed at him and slapped him in his face, which was now slightly red, but never came a tear out of Fuji's eyes.

"We should send him into prison! I'll never accept a rapist as my brother! How could he do this to us?" Yumiko screamed and hold the hand of her fiancé strongly. The young man sat quietly at the table and smirked.

"That might be the best idea." The father spoke and stood up from the chair in the kitchen and walked out of it. "I need a walk. I'll be back in some minutes." Syusuke looked up from his place and viewed down the stairs, into the same blue eyes as his but only from his father. Frustration, disgust, shame and some more disappointed emotions filled the cold eyes.

Why wouldn't anybody listen to him? Why wouldn't anyone believe him? Why wouldn't anybody trust him and let him speak? Syusuke stood up and went to his room, closed the door quietly with his smiling mask on his face anew as he packed the necessary things with only one thought in his mind.

'You chase your own son out of the house because you believe what a stranger said to you? You don't want to listen to me? You believe and trust other people more than your own son? Why?
Because I don't show anybody my real me? Because I am me? Do you want to punish me because I'm myself?'

His mother, his father, his sisters and brothers were shocked. They knew their youngest son/brother clung often at his best friend but that they would do 'this' kind of stuff had shocked them. They only wanted to say goodbye before they would go shopping and leave the two of them alone but as Eiji's mother opened the door and saw how her child kissed Oishi on the lips in his bed and pushed the T-shirt further up, she had screamed from shock and unpleasantness. How could her son do something like this? Didn't he love cute girls? They sat in the living room, quietly – no one dared to speak, too awkward was the situation. Eiji and Oishi sat beside each other against the wall. The cat-boy looked sadly at his boyfriend and saw the fear of separation in his eyes. Oishi didn't like it either, his own parents would be here in a few minutes after his lover's parents had informed them about their 'action'.

"What the hell were you thinking, Eiji? Haven't you said once you wanted to have a nice wife and some children? What about your dream now? How could you do…it? Do you even know what you were doing a moment ago?" His mother screamed furiously and approached the two sitting boys. She gazed with all her hate at Oishi. "And how dare you to lay a finger on my innocent boy?"

She slapped the boy with a bowl-haircut hard in the face and Oishi could hold his balance right in time but the main fight had just started. Oishi's mother had seen how her baby got slapped by this woman and she got angry as hell. The fight between the family Oishi and Kikumaru began. "How dare you to slap my boy!" Oishi's father pulled his son on the feet and forced Oishi to stay behind him. In the meantime was Eiji pulled to his feet, too, and got pushed by his siblings to stay away from the 'foe'. The two boys looked around their family members and their gaze met. Both were filled with fear, love and doubt.

'Because we love and care for one another you want to separate us? Why? What is so wrong about it? Can't you see? We're old enough to decide for our own life! Do you want to punish us because we're ourselves?'

He slammed the door shut, trying to shut not only the door but the annoying cries from his mother out of his mind. It was her fault for cheating on his father. It hadn't wondered Momoshiro that his family started to break. Or was it already broken? Half a month ago, he had seen his mother dating another man in brown clothes and short brown hair. He had no doubt; she had slept with the damn man. No, it wasn't his mother's fault. It was the man's fault that his parents were in this situation right now. Momo's room was dark, only the moonlight exposed the desk with his school books. He grabbed one of his books and threw it with all his strength out of his closed window. The glass shattered in all directions and the loud crash howled around the neighbourhood. He curse in his loud voice, tried to hold his tears back. He was sixteen and his family thought already to whom he would go after they would be divorced!

"GOD DAMNED!" Another thing from his desk flew out of the broken window and he hit with his fist furiously against the wall. It hurt but he did it again and again, hoping the pain in his hand would be stronger than the pain in his heart. He didn't want a broken family and move in another town. He would have to leave every friend and all the regulars only because of his dumb parents!

"If I should ever see this guy again, I'll kill him!" After half an hour, it got quieter in the house, silent sobs could be still heard but the harsh curses from his parents had finally stopped. The boy sat against the wall, opened slowly his door and listened to the conversations in the kitchen. "You should take him. I have enough to do with work; I have neither time nor a place for Takeshi!" His mother said in a cold tone, stood up from the chair in the kitchen and went to their room. She started to pack her suitcase.

"You know, I have either a place or time, for him, just like you! And otherwise you're his mother, you should take him!" The father replied and leaned against the doorframe with his arms crossed before his chest, an annoyed expression on his face.

"Because I'm his mother? Just because of that? I have my own life to live! I don't want him. To give birth to him was the biggest mistake that I have ever made." She threw a picture frame at him. The picture was an old photo from their marriage. Momoshiro crashed his head with full force at the wall, his eyes were wet but he didn't let a tear escape his eyes. He stood up and began to pack his own things in a rush.

'Nobody wants me? Am I such a horrible son? Because I'm not as good as other pupils in my school? Because I'm not the best in tennis? Because I'm not needed in this family? Do you want to punish me because I'm myself?'

"Kaoru open the door, NOW! I warn you if you don't open this god damned door…." His uncle shouted at him through the locked door but Kaidoh Kaoru didn't move an inch from his position. He typed the last words in his mail and pressed the 'send'-button. The boy leaned back in his chair and waited for his senpai to reply - hopefully with a good answer. "Kaoru, I know you have had other plans for your future but this is the best. It would be the best if you would just take the education in the XYX Company for animal experiments. You'll get high paid and the colleagues are all nice and clean. Kaoru!" His Uncle didn't let go of his torturing idea. Kaidoh opened his bag one more time, controlled if everything is inside and heard the little bell to signal that an e-mail had arrived. He went over to his computer and read the mail quietly out loud but quietly enough for others not to hear.

"Sure, I'll wait for you. I'll send you my new address to your mobile. Love, Sadaharu." Kaidoh blushed a bit and was lucky his boyfriend had inherited a house which was big enough for a whole football-team. The viper turned his computer off, put his mobile in his jacket pocket, took his bag and left the house through the window. Never would he harm any animal only to test something on it. The thought about it broke his heart in two.

"Kaoru, you'll take this job. You'll like it. It isn't as bad as it sound, believe me! I had worked there, too. Kaoru, are you listening? If you don't take this education I'll abandon you out of my family! Your mother would be disappointed if she was still alive! I'll not let you be like your lousy father who had killed an innocent man without hesitation! Dare to be like him and…."

'Fshuu, why can't you leave me alone and let me live my life on my own? I'm old enough to stand on my own two feet. You don't know the truth about my father and just because I still love him, you want to change me and hate him just like you do?
What is so wrong about being me? Do you want to punish me because I'm myself?'

Kaidoh didn't hear anything further. So what if his father had killed someone? He knew the real story behind the kill, not like his uncle who had read the shit from the newspaper. His mother had told him the truth before she died in the accident. He could never hate his father. He ran along the empty street and read the new message on his mobile. He was free from his violently uncle.

~~ 29. August, Morning ~~

A creepy and depressing aura filled the tennis courts in Seishun Gakuen High School. The morning practice for the regulars ended and Kawamura wondered what happened to all his usually happy friends.

Oishi, the Vice-Captain, had a worried expression on his face – worse than normally.
Eiji hadn't hugged or jumped at everyone - especially not at Echizen.
Echizen had played worse than ever and was quieter than he was used to – he had lost against everyone who had played against him and not a single 'mada mada dane' had escaped from his mouth.
Momoshiro had thrown his racket away countless times and cursed more often.
Only Fuji acted normal but his smile was somehow different as on the other days.

What had happened to them? Kawamura went up to Kaidoh and Inui who had talked about the same topic. Something was clearly wrong with them. It was good that Tezuka was once again in Germany to recover for a few days.

"There is a 72,13% chance it has something to do with their family." Came Inui's conclusion. Kaidoh hissed and looked at his rival and friend. Momoshiro was more aggressive; it had only need a little touch to bring him to explode. It was a disaster and they needed everyone to calm the spiky-haired teen down. The sky was cloudy and it was a little foggy, it would rain badly tonight. Kaidoh could feel it. "Let's try to talk to them when we're changing our clothes." Kawamura glanced over his shoulder and to his friends. Most of them were on their ways in the clubhouse, so the three followed them silently. As they were changing Inui asked with a deep monotone voice.

"So, what is it that makes everyone so depress?" The regulars stopped in their movement but nobody looked up or said anything. Momo fought with himself and decided to speak first. He looked up with glassy eyes to his senpai. Should he say it? Should he ask for help? Where could he go? He wanted to run away tonight but where to? If he wouldn't find a home for tonight he would more or less sleep on the streets. He swallowed hard and breathed deeply. "My parents are going to move, probably in another town." It was almost the truth. The room got silent for a moment and nobody moved. Eiji shook his head like a cat as he had recovered from the bad news.

"W-What?"

"Yeah, pretty bad, mhm…I'm thinking about moving out and living alone, haha." Momo laughed a bit nervously, finished dressing and wanted to go out of the room but his friends stopped him midway. They looked shocked.

"You're going to move? When?" Oishi asked with his worrying voice. The mother-hen put his hands on Momo's shoulder and guided him to the bench. A shadow rushed out of the room as everyone was questioning the new problem.

"Mhm…" Inui scribbled something inside his notebook. "This was something I hadn't expected. I have missed to calculate this! I need to train myself more!"

"Can't you speak with your parents? Maybe you could move in with someone of us?" Eiji spoke in a sad tone. So he wasn't the only one who had problems with his parents? His family had made a decision; he would transfer into another school, far away from his friends. Maybe moving out secretly wasn't such a bad idea?

"I don't know yet but I think in the week." Momo let his head fall down in depression. It was harder as he had expected. Small tears were on their way out of his eyes.

'You'll not cry when your friends are around! You can do it alone! You don't need anyone but if I don't ask for help then...'

He told himself, stood up without hesitation and bowed down to his upperclassmen. "I….I wanted to ask if someone of you… .maybe I could….er…" A big lump sat in his throat. He pressed his eyes closed; trying to hold the tears inside but sadly, he couldn't stop it. Silent sobs escaped his mouth and the regulars looked at each other's faces. How could they take him in one of their houses when they had enough problems with their own parents, too? The awkward quietness was uncomfortable and Momo got more and more sad and hopeless. "I-I just wanted to say thanks, haha. Yeah, thank you for everything." He lifted his head, picked up his tennis bag, with all his clothes and living things inside, and dashed out of the room without a second glance.

'No, it can't be! He is leaving me, too? Why? Am I this disgusting? Had he seen my true self?'

His skin turned slowly into fur, the boy panicked, tried to rub it off but it grew only stronger. His vision was blurry and clear at the same time, his body ached and the teen couldn't hold himself onto his feet. He stumble one more step forward in an alley around the clubhouse and fell on his knees. He pressed his hands against his heavy chest. It was difficult to breathe and everything around him was too loud. It was always the same but every time it felt as if someone beat him up. Every inch of his body burnt, hurt, pained and he couldn't stop it.

'Please not now! I have school! What about tennis practice? I can't! Not here and now! I'll only hurt them, maybe kill them! NO, I can't!'

But it was too late. Hands and feet transformed to black claws, out of nowhere appeared animal ears and a big, fizzy tail in black. His clothes shredded and fell to the ground just as his school bag did.

'I need to hide, before someone sees me! Before they hate me! Before they see me and push me away like the others! I can't show them my true self! I need to hide before I kill them!'

The regulars looked sadly at each other. Oishi took his boyfriend in a tight embrace, ignored the stares from the others and turned his head to Fuji, who was staring with open eyes out of the window. "Fuji, can't he stay with you today?" The called boy blinked once, twice but didn't move. It was somehow scary. Never had they seen their tensai so … uneasy.

"Sorry but I'm about to live on my own, too. I'm still searching for a flat or something, sorry." The tensai left the room in a rush. He couldn't tell his friends that he would be probably soon in prison if he wouldn't escape from his family. When his family wouldn't listen to him, then why would his friend do it?

"F-Fuji…" Kawamura followed his friend with big steps but the tensai was gone. The 'burning' boy was stunned and viewed to the right and left but not a single hint where his friend had gone. Kawamura waited a few more minutes before the other teammates came out of the clubroom. Kaidoh, Oishi, Eiji and Kawamura walked to their class while Fuji, who was in the alley next to the clubhouse, breathed out deeply. They haven't noticed him. He took a step backwards and slid at someone's clothes which lay on the dirty ground. The brown-haired teen couldn't hold his balance and fell on the wet, cold and hard ground. It had rained today's morning, and so would it do tonight, but the clothes weren't drenched, they were shredder and actually slightly warm.

'Who? Why?'

Syusuke gazed around but no one was there. Strange. He stood up and turned around to go out of his hidden place but a familiar stranger viewed at him from the entrance of the little alley. "There was a 100% chance that you would be here." Inui pushed his glasses a bit up and crossed his arms over his chest. "There is something I want to know!"