People say it's quite unlikely

The two of us should stick

But I just tell 'em – hey!

It's Me and My Dick!

Me and My Dick the musical, go YouTube it! By the same guys who did "A Very Potter Musical." Haven't seen it? See it =D

ooooooooooooo

'So you want... natural?'

'Yup.'

'But like you made an effort.'

'Uh-huh.'

'But not too much of an effort...'

'Nope.'

''Cause then he'll know how much you like him?'

'Yup.'

'I need to sit down...' Brittany flopped down on the floor of the make-up aisle in the drugstore. Santana shot her a warning look and she jumped straight back up again. 'But what's with all the fuss? It's just Puck. The outfit we spent three hours shopping for will just end up on his bedroom floor and whatever make-up we choose will just like, evaporate anyways.'

'Tonight's kind of a big night.'

'Sex with the lights on?' Brittany nodded knowledgeably.

'Nope-'

'Sex with the curtains open?'

'Brittany, no sex. I told you, that's the point.'

'But... why?'

'Because, I want him to see more in me than just a casual lay and a fantastic rack.'

'But... why?'

'I feel like I want to be valued more. I don't know, it was kinda sudden.' Santana threw down the blusher in disdain. 'Does this crappy store have anything decent?'

'Not as decent as you...' the voice floated over Santana's head. She rolled her eyes.

'What a beautiful lukewarm sentiment. What are you doing here?' she elbowed him gently in the stomach before turning to face him.'

'Hi Puck!' Brittany chimed in.

'Hey, Brit.' Puck threw the package he held in the air and caught it quickly. 'Just getting ready for tonight, babe.' He waved it in her face.

She snatched it from him and upon catching a glance of the words "ribbed for her pleasure," punched him in the shoulder. 'These!' She gestured wildly. 'Are out of bounds!' She threw them into the feminine hygiene aisle, where she knew Puck was afraid to go. 'No one here is getting laid tonight.'

'I might be!' piped up Brittany.

'Shut up, Brit. You got that, Puckerman?'

'I got that, Lopez.' He smirked.

'See you tonight then, Puckerman.'

'I'll be there, Lopez.'

'Fine.'

'Fine.' Puck winked and turned away.

'He is such an ass.' Santana turned back to Brittany.

'You love me for it!' his voice came from the end of the aisle.

'Shut up!'

ooooooooooooooooooo

'Hey, pussy, did you wimp out?' Matt greeted him at the front of the store.

'Fuck you, she's still on this "no sex tonight" shit. I'll get her to come around. I just need to be sneaky.' Puck pulled out his cell phone and dialled his older brother's number. 'Yo, Brad? I'ma need some of your condom stash, man... six should do. Thanks, bro.' He hung up and turned to Matt. 'I am gonna fuck her senseless.'

ooooooooooooooooooooo

Oh, Puck, when will you learn?

Reviews are lovely =D

Nice reviews are even lovelier =D

xx