Hey! So...you're probably thinking that I'm a terrible person. Which I am. I'm terrible at consistent updates. And I promised you 3,000 words...I failed...:( BUT! Here is chapter 5! Please yell and send me hate mail. I need some tough love...

NOTE: Yes, this chapter is dramatic. Apparently, I can't keep my genre straight either!

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Remember last time—when I said I called Rachel? Yeah…that was a great idea. For the guide, it's a great plan for falling out of love. But it's not so great when your best friend refuses to talk to you for the next century…

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Rule Number Five: Call Her Sister

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Never, ever, ever do this unless the sister of your love is not a flirt and if you aren't suspected of being in a relationship with said sister. Otherwise, unless you're me, this is a pretty fine idea for jealousy. But if you're me…well, good luck talking to your best friend again.

I decided to call at 11:30 PM. I thought Liv might be asleep or absorbed in her work. I was wrong.

"Hello?" She answered. My luck is just dropping every second…

"Can I talk to Rachel?" I said in a hurry, hoping she wouldn't recognize my voice (I did lower it a few octaves).

"Sure, Peter." She spat. Oh, no, what have I done? I probably just ruined the best thing that's ever happened to me. I have a pretty good habit of doing that, huh? I'm such an idiot…why did I choose RACHEL of all people? I could've talked to Astrid or even Walter would be better than this…I'm such an idiot, why on earth—

"Hello?"

"Rachel, I need some advice. You know, friend to friend." Yes, I'm friends with my best friend's sister. Is that such a crime? Maybe when you're IN LOVE with your best friend…

"Hold on." I heard her close a door (probably so Liv wouldn't hear). "What do you want help with, Peter?"

"Okay, I have this…friend. He's kind of in love with his work partner, but he doesn't want to be, because he doesn't really like the feeling."

That sounds so much better in my head. "Anyways, he sets these guidelines so that he doesn't spiral into insanity with how much he loves this girl. These…rules…have caused this girl to totally hate him, but he's losing his best friend. What does he do?" I held my breath. Please say something helpful Rachel…

"Well, you can start by never calling her house for her sister again…"

I guess I was a little too obvious, huh? I'm such a dunce. I don't think I'll ever learn.

"But I'd suggest you stop acting like an idiot. I really thought you were better than that."

"Your sister already suggested that." I sighed. I just can't do anything right!

"Liv is known to be rather smart." She smirked.

I could feel it. I knew Liv was smart. She was very, very smart.

"Don't ask for my help again. It's probably the stupidest thing you could've done. I bet Liv isn't so happy about this. Get your act together and act like a man. Liv might kill you if you don't. And she has a gun."

"Thanks, Rachel." I rolled my eyes. "Goodbye."

I hung up the phone and groaned. I just ruined everything. Everything! Normally, this would be good…this means I don't have to worry about being in love.

This is where I learned my mistake.

I wasn't falling out of love; I was only pushing it away! Man, I'm the world's biggest idiot. That stupid butterfly feeling was still there when I thought of Liv. Just when I thought my plan was working, too…

There was no plan. That plan failed before it began. I felt like yelling at the world about all of my secrets and just everything. I'm trapped in my own brain and it's KILLING ME!

I realized if I was going to at least be friends with Liv, I would have to tell her everything. That was the only way she would ever even come close to forgiving me. But how on EARTH would I ever find the courage to do something like that?

I decided it was time to turn to my last resort. That's right…

Walter.

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Before I go on, let me just say that at this point that I was desperate. I didn't think anyone could hurt me, so what had I to lose? So, of course, I went to my father. The only other man I knew capable of maybe giving me advice past midnight.

This actually proved to be a better idea than I had ever imagined. Walter probably changed my life that night.

First, I told him about how I fell in love with Olivia (it just poured out, I swear), the 'guide', the phone call to Rachel…everything, in short.

SMACK! "Son, you have to go in there and fight for her! You think that if you keep acting like a—a—baboon—she'll even want to look at you again? You are wrong, my boy. I can't believe I raised you. I thought you were better with women. I assumed wrong. You two are going to get married and have children and live happily ever after!"

My first thought after this outburst was Did he just head-smack me? Then, his words actually sank in. Was Walter really that upset about this whole Olivia thing? Was I really that atrocious? I wonder what Astrid thought about the situation.

But Walter was my awakening. Walter Bishop actually is good at giving relationship advice. Who would've guessed? Walter Bishop made me realize how stupid everything I've been doing for the past few weeks has been. Well, kind of. I mean, I am a pretty smart person if I do say so myself.

"Alright, I'll be back, Walter." I told him and left. But as I walked out the door, I heard him mutter, "That boy needs to learn some manners."

…

I arrived at Olivia's door at 1:30 in the morning. Why so late, you ask? Well, I spent forty-five minutes psyching myself up to just go to her door. So finally I got the courage to knock on her apartment door. When she swung open the door, I was almost scared out of my skin.

She looked absolutely furious. I was afraid she might smack me at any moment. But it was worse; she just stared me down for a long time before finally I found the courage to speak.

"I have a lot to tell you." I said simply. What better than to say the truth? Olivia nodded along.

"Yeah, you sure do." She opened the door. No 'come on in, Peter'? I guess it was well deserved, huh?

"Okay, first off, let me just say that I'm sorry for calling your apartment for Rachel. That was probably the stupidest thing I've ever done in a while. And I'm sorry."

"You got that right."

"Alright, for the second part, you might want to sit down."

She hesitantly let me in and I began pacing in front of her couch. She sat down on her couch; impatiently awaiting my explanation. And so I began. "You have to promise to just let me talk without interruption."

She nodded. I hoped Olivia stayed true to this. Because things were about to get real tricky…

"So it all started when I fell in love with you." THERE! It's out! I snuck a glance at her face. It was in a scowl before. Her jaw was half open; eyes wide. I could see that she was trying as hard as she could to keep a straight face.

I looked away as fast I had looked over in the first place. I don't think she noticed (thank God).

Throughout my whole speech, I paced in front of the couch and played with my hands. "I've had enough failures with relationships in my life that I didn't need anymore. I decided to fall out of love with you. So in order to do so, I made these…rules. Very simple, but difficult to follow. You know: no eye contact, no physical contact, yada yada yada. I didn't realize until recently that I wasn't falling out of love; I was being an idiot. You can't just fall out of love. It's not a choice. It just happens."

"What I was really doing was pushing away you. You as in, my only real friend in this godforsaken world. And I was scared. I was scared that if I fell in love with you, everything would become unstable. It would be…different. I couldn't stand different. I want to apologize for my selfish actions and my idiotic thinking."

I stopped pacing all at once and looked at Olivia. She was looking at her hands, settled in her lap, and expressionless. I took this as my cue to leave.

And that's what I did.

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You want to know the biggest mistake you can make when you fall in love and don't want to?

It's telling her that you're in love with her. Because when I went home that night, I felt absolutely terrible. Rejection is the worst. Of course, I realized that this rejection was only assumed. I mean, she didn't even say anything. What was I supposed to think?

So here I was, at 2:15 in the morning, just sitting on my couch, and moping. Mopey Moperson…that's what they call me.

The phone rang. I almost jumped off the couch in excitement for a distraction. I wondered what my life had come to.

"Hello?" I tried to sound cool. I'm not too desperate…yet.

"I'll be there in fifteen." Olivia spoke. Bet you saw that coming, didn't you? Yeah, I did too. So I sat on my couch for fifteen minutes and waited.

Sixteen minutes later, Olivia knocked on my door. I knew it was her only because no one else would bother coming to my house at this time. Or at all…

"Hey." I said. Olivia stood there, arms crossed defensively. I motioned for her to come in. We stood at the foot of the stairs for a moment.

"So you're in love with me." Olivia stated. I nodded.

"It seems that is the case."

"Why?"

"I don't know. Maybe it's just…I don't know. I don't want to get all mushy and tell you all the things I love about you. That wouldn't be me. Or us. That would be a cheesy romance novel." Olivia smiled slightly. I crossed my arms and looked at her eyes. They shone with something I couldn't place.

"You're right. And I came over to say that I'm sorry for getting so mad at you. I didn't realize the stress you were under."

"I was stupid to push you away, Olivia, I know. Thanks for saying you're sorry, but I really don't want to deal with rejection on top of everything else tonight. So if that's what you came here to do, please leave."

"Peter, you think I'm that insensitive?"

I thought about this for a moment. She was right. She wouldn't just leave. And it was idiotic of me to think so.

"No. Why did you come here then?"

"I came here to say…" She took a deep breath and sighed heavily. "…that maybe those feelings that you have for me could possibly be acted on."

"Possibly?" I smiled a little at this. It was so like Olivia to admit her feelings so vaguely.

"Maybe."

"How would we go about acting on these feelings?"

"Well, maybe going out for dinner. Or lunch."

"No. That's too cliché…we need something more…weird."

"Weird?" She scrunched up her nose adorably (what other way can she do it?).

"We're always a little weird."

"You got that right." We stood there awkwardly. How is one supposed to act when they're trying to think up non-romantic ideas for a first date?

"Paintballing." I finally said. It was non-romantic and very us. I thought it was perfect. And so did Olivia.

"That sounds perfect." She smiled. I stepped forward and tentatively leaned forward, asking with my eyes if it was alright. She nodded. I happily pulled her into a partially intimate hug.

Because kissing is so cliché at this moment.

We aren't walks in the park or Italian dinners or kissing when appropriate.

We're paintballing and practicing at the shooting range and kissing when it's least appropriate (or when we want to).

And I love that. No matter how hypocritical it is to sound romantic.

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And this is where you yell at me for being overly cheesy xD Thank you so much to Erickson for betaing this mess of a chapter! You're my hero! Oh, and one of these days we'll get our hands on Alt!Liv for sure!