A/n: I don't know where it came from, I just know it's written and that it's not bad. It's slash, there are mentions of sexual abuse, sex and death, but nothing graphic. Please enjoy. -bow-

I forget when this started, when he actually let me in.

I forget when I first let that horrid soup pass my lips. Lao Mang Long Soup burns the first time your drink it, it makes your stomach turn, your eyes water, makes your muscles spasm, and it makes you forget who you were before you drank it. After that first swallow, it becomes easy to swallow and the taste becomes sweeter, but that first drink is always the worse.

I can remember he hadn't expected the change it put me through. He hadn't expected the giant fangs, the snow ready paws, the claws of steel, nor the fur that was impenetrable even to his claws. I hadn't expected to become a monstrous saber-wolf. I thought I'd turn into a monkey, or a bug of some type, but obviously that wasn't what the soup thought I should be.

He had smirked and patted my, now anyway, strong back and let his hands slide through the silky red and white fur, "Not bad, Spicer. Not bad at all." When I returned to my human form, I was different. My body had filled out, not with the obvious strength of Raimundo or Chase, but with the lean strength of a wolf. My hair was white with blood red streaks and tips, my eyes were more dog like, still a ruby red, but it faded to orange at the center. I was sleek and poised for a fight.

Chase had been so impressed that he'd given me a real room and accepted me as his only apprentice. He got me new cloths and skin tight black armor that was as penetrable as my fur. The armor was put under black jeans and my trench. I refused to get rid of my goggles, so he allowed me have them around my neck with the choker that served as my collar in my wolf form. He trained me to act as an animal, a fighter, and a hunter.

My instincts became sharper, I could give Chase a run for his money in a fight, and my senses were stronger then any humans. Chase turned me into his perfect weapon, teaching me to let my human mind merge with my animal mind so that no conflict would appear between them. I wasn't flawless, I still loved technology and had my robots, but they were stronger, different.

I was different.

Chase worked me through everything in just a few short months. His praise and pride growing with each accomplishment. When it came time for my debut, Chase rested our foreheads together and stared into my eyes like a father would his son, "I've done all I can for you. Don't let me down like others have. I gave you immortality, I gave you power, and I taught you like a Xaiolin monk. You could pass for a Dragon of the Wind, now prove to me your better then him." and I would.

I walked by his side as a wolf. My shoulders rolling with ever step, a soft growl escaping my lips when any of his warriors got to close to me. I wasn't being mean to them, but my fur could be harmful if they weren't careful. Chase had hooked a chain leash to my collar, walking me towards the Shin Gong Wu. When the Xaiolin Dragons saw us, they eyed me suspiciously.

Chase unhooked my leash, but kept two fingers hooked in my collar. Omi stepped back, "That is not a cat."

Kimiko snorted, "You're ruining your image, Chase. You really should stick with your cats."

Chase smirked and pulled my muzzle to his face and gave it a soft kiss, "This is not a fallen warrior. This is my apprentice." I took the hint and shifted to my human form. I kept my head down, showing his respect as my master. Chase stood, his hand running over my hair.

I stood and lifted my head. The Dragons, Wuya and Hannibal started to laugh. Raimundo leaned against a rock for support, "If you think Jack is a worthy opinionate, you're trippin, man! He couldn't win if he was fighting a stick!" I crashed my fist into a rock, shattering it into pebbles. Raimundo and the others stopped laughing.

Chase clicked his tongue at me, "Temper, Spicer, temper." I smirked, knowing he was only telling me not to show off. Wuya walked away from Hannibal and rested her body against mine.

Her lips bushed my ear, "Jack, where were you hiding all of this power? Your as strong as Chase and you've grown up. You'd make a wonderful partner." I smirked and settled on hand on the small of her back.

I let my lips kiss her ear as I spoke, "You're a whore, Wuya, not even worth the shit of the insects under our feet." she looked at me in surprise while Chase let a small smirk cross his lips. Wuya walked away with her tail between her legs. Hannibal glanced me over, trying to find a way to manipulate me. I walked forward and touched the Shin Gong Wu, Raimundo quickly put his hand on the Wu and glared at me. I smirked, "Ready to get your ass handed to you, Pretty Boy?"

Raimundo snarled, "Keep dreaming, Sissy Boy." I noticed Kimiko's worried look as Raimundo glared at me. She was his weakness and the only way to manipulate him, not that I needed to, but I could. Raimundo smirked, "I challenge you to a Xaiolin Showdown!"

I grinned, "Name your game."

"A car race. First one to get the girl and bring her back to the start line wins." I sighed, "And to be fair, Spicer, you can pick your girl."

He wanted me to pick Kimiko. I wasn't that stupid. I looked to the cats Chase had brought with us. I looked at looked until my eyes landed on her, "I pick Chun Hyang." the white tiger stood and as she stalked towards us, her cat form faded.

First came long, smooth, creamy legs barely covered by a sheer skirt. Her full hips and sex covered by a bathing suit like bottom, her cream stomach was shown off and her firm, full breasts were covered by a bone like chest plate the looked like a bra. Her long black hair was pulled into a high ponytail with long bangs falling to her hips. She made it to my side and rested her delicate, but deadly hand, on my shoulder. I made sure to kiss it as a sign of respect.

Raimundo was in shock at her goddess like figure. I smirked, "Your turn."

He looked at Kimiko, "I pick Kimiko." she was suddenly in a black silk kimono that showed off her legs and she looked like a geisha. She was more cute, then sexy or elegant. Chun Hang squeezed my shoulder, protecting me against the girl she saw as a threat.

I had to comfort her in some way, "The girls can't fight. Their just parts of the game. They can't fight, be used at weapons, be attacked, or harm. If any of these are broken, the man who commits the crime looses by default." Raimundo nodded in agreement obviously not wanting Kimiko to get hurt.

We found ourselves in the cars in a heart beat with the track bending around the clouds with an obvious path. My car was a deep bloody red while his was a smooth forest green. We looked at each other, "Gong Ye Tem Pai!" We both took off as soon as Dojo dropped the flag. After years of owning a go cart and playing virtual reality games this was nothing to me. Raimundo seemed to be having difficulty keep his car at a steady, high speed.

I whipped past the turns and swerves while he struggled to get by them. I stopped at the pick up point and politely lead Chun Hyang to the car. She smiled, her eyes laughing, when I handed her a pair of Hollywood white sunglasses. She slid them on and I took off. Raimundo picked up Kimiko and was on my tail. He'd finally adjusted to the game. The real fun began. I realised that we hadn't wagered any Shin Gong Wu, but I figured something else was on the table. As I came to the finish line, I noticed Chase and Dojo both holding a Shin Gong Wu.

Chase was holding the Eagle Scope and Dojo was holding the Sword of the Storm. They had worked out the wager on their own. I crossed the finish line just as Raimundo caught up with me.

Everything faded away and we were left in the field while I held the three Shin Gong Wu in my arms. Chun Hyang turned back into a white tiger and Chase patted me on the back. The victory actually felt hallow. I couldn't find any joy in winning, in finally proving I was just as good as he was. Wuya's voice spoke to me from Hannibal's side, " It's not what you wanted, is it, Jack? You didn't want to win against them with their own talents, you wanted a victory with your robots, didn't you? You don't feel like you've won and you never will. Chase only made you like him, he didn't make you any better then you were." Wuya and Hannibal were gone before I turn to her.

I looked at Chase, his eyes trying to discover the truth in my own, but I looked away. He snarled, "Is she right? Did you really only come to me to make your robots stronger?" I couldn't look at him. I didn't know what I had wanted from Chase when I came to him. I just couldn't remember, but I knew that it actually had nothing to do with the Xaiolin Monks, the Shin Gong Wu, or even my robots.

I met his eyes, "I don't know." he stormed away, his cats not far behind.

"You really screwed that up." I turned to see Kimiko hugging Raimundo's waist while his arms embraced her shoulders. Kimiko smiled at me, "You really should have just told him that you love him. It's three words, three syllables, five vowels and three consonants. It only takes one breath to say it."

I stared at her blankly. Did I love Chase?

I got back to the lair only to find that the door wouldn't open. I sank down with my back to the door and curled in on myself. My knees to my chest and my face buried in my knees. I tried to remember why I had come to Chase in the first place. I could remember that I wanted to be near him, to be something important to him. I had to think back to that day, the days before that.

I knew this was my first Showdown in a year, but I had only been with Chase for six months. So… what had happened the six months before that? I remember my last loss. I had lost all my Shin Gong Wu trying to get the Mudang Bottle. I could remember that the Mudang Bottle had the power to heal any wound of the heart or soul, but not a physical wound. I had wanted it for my mother, I wanted it so I could heal her broken heart and take away the pain my father's death had left her with.

I could remember that she died and the day of her burial I went to Chase.

Was that why I went to him? Because I had no where to go, no one to go to?

-Flash Back-

"Don't you have anything better to do then annoy me?"

Jack shivered lightly from the fact that his cloths were soaked from the rain, "I… I need somewhere to stay and the monks wouldn't take me in if I promised they could lock me up."

Chase glared at the shivering boy, "So why come to me? Go to Wuya."

Jack shivered again, "I did. She called me worthless and slammed the door in my face. I'm only sixteen. I have two years before I can touch my inheritance and I don't have any family." Jack felt the tears welling up in his eyes, but he didn't dare let them fall. He didn't dare move until Chase told him to stay or leave.

"Spicer." Jack sighed and turned towards the door when a large black lion stepped in front of him and snarled. Jack shrank back, he should have just gone to live with his Aunt and Megan, "Ro with take you to your room. If you need new cloths, he will fetch some for you."

Jack swallowed thickly, "My back pack is at the door. I left it there so I could retrieve it if you kicked me out." a panther walked towards him with a black backpack in it's jaws, "Thanks." The lion nudged him towards a dark hallway. Jack followed the lion without questioning Chase or the cat.

-End Flash Back-

I lifted my head from my knees. That couldn't be right. I had no memory of going to Wuya, but I knew she was cruel enough to do such a think to me. My mind caught up with my thoughts. I had lied to Chase that day. Twice and he hadn't picked up on it. I had tricked him, made him believe a lie.

What had I been masking? I knew that I had worshiped Chase, bowed at his feet and hung on his every word. But… there was something else.

-Flash Back-

"What are you doing here, Faggot?" Jack flinched away from the bully he knew all to well. He was in his school office.

"I'm transferring out. Family issues."

The bully snorted, "What? Is your Daddy sending you to boot camp to beat the dick out of you?" Jack flinched again after handing everything to the office lady. She gave him a soft smiled.

"Hope everything works out for you, honey." Jack smiled at her and left the office. The bully followed.

"Hey! Cocksucker! I asked a question."

Jack looked back, "My dad died in a car accident. My mom is taking me to our estate in England. She doesn't want to stay here." the bully smirked coldly.

"So your never coming back?" Jack nodded. The bully moved before Jack could think to run, "Haha. Why don't you give me a parting gift, Spicer?" Jack struggled as he was dragged into the boys bathroom.

-End Flash Back-

"That's right. He forced me to give him a blow job." I don't know why I said it out loud. Probably to make sure it was actually me remembering this and not some phantom. I shook my head, trying to clear out the fog around my memories. From what I remembered I didn't fight back, actually, I almost enjoyed it.

"Spicer." I looked up at Chase and it hit me. I had pretended that it was the Dragon Lord that had his cock in my mouth, I had forced my mind to believe that it was Chase. He glared at me, "Why didn't you knock?"

I shrugged, "I… didn't think of it. I was trying to get my memories back." Chase seemed confused, "I couldn't remember the six months before I came here. I couldn't remember why."

Chase glared at me. I looked away, "I never went to Wuya and I had family, but I didn't like those options." I felt his hand at my arm before he even touched it, but I didn't shift away.

He pulled me to my feet, "What do you mean, Spicer?"

"I lied." Chase waited, "I lied because… I… um… I… never mind." okay. Telling him I love him wasn't the best idea.

"Tell me, Spicer."

"I'd rather not." I still couldn't build a back bone around him. I couldn't stand my ground with him. Not even after the Lao Mang Long Soup. I just couldn't.

He slammed me up against a wall, "Tell me or I'll rip out your spine and force it down your throat." as painful at that sounded, once the spine was gone you wouldn't feel anything.

"I wouldn't feel any pain." He snarled at me, "What? The spine controls your nervous system. Once it's gone you don't feel pain anymore!"

He smirked and chuckled lightly, "Your right, Spicer. Maybe that's why I like you better then the others. Your smarter, stronger, and far more attractive." I felt my heart sink. Attractive? Was that what he wanted? An attractive partner with nothing to them? I guess that made sense.

"I thought I was an ugly worm?" I was only quoting him. Really. That's all.

He pressed me to the wall, his gold eyes now molten lava, "You aren't the only one with a silver tongue, Spicer." I flinched. I hadn't meant to lie to him, "Though, I guess if you remember I don't have to be so cautious."

This clicked instantly, "You knew?"

"You talk in your sleep. I don't sleep. I found you more amusing then training. You really are a loose cannon when your asleep. Well, not after the soup, but you were." I put my weight against the wall. Chase leaned closer to me, his forehead to mine, his eyes staring into mine. I gave a light nod and his lips met mine.

It wasn't more then a few seconds later that we were in his bedroom, now our bedroom. I didn't have to pretend anymore, I was with Chase.

a/n: It was hard writing as a changed Jack. If I were to write from this point of view in the show it would be way different, but I had to change him for everything to work out. Plus I think Jack really would do anything for Chase. Thank you for reading. -bow-