My Little Kurama

Chapter Two

The thing about ponies was...

The thing about ponies was...

The thing about ponies is, Kurama thought, is that they really don't get things like atmosphere. Like the atmosphere up here, in the sky. In the dark, stormy sky where it was freezing cold and the only light, the only light, mind you, came from...

Gods, he couldn't even force himself to think it. The description would have to be solely the responsibility of narrative.

The only light in the sky came from Firefly, glowing in pinky-blue phosphorescence against the black clouds. Well, that and the lightning, but it was mostly from Firefly. Firefly the pegasus pony. On whom Kurama, a 2000-something year old demon shoved into the body of a child was inexpertly mounted.

Kurama pulled his mind back from detached narrative and sighed, adjusting so he could look down beyond himself and Firefly. There wasn't anything to see, of course, just the dark earth under a dark sky, but something, far in the distance was sparking. He hoped it was a fire, but considering the way things had been going lately, he was dreadfully sure that it was the glow of magic protecting...

Oh, just muscle through it. You are completely capable of suspending your disbelief for long enough to accept that you're riding on a magical caricature of a horse through an impossible sky. He told himself this with no small amount of self-hatred. It is perfectly logical, under these circumstances, to accept that you're on your way to Dream Castle to help save the ponies.

Yuusuke, rest his mad soul, would have laughed himself sick. Hiei would have waited a few seconds after that explanation to allow Kurama a prayer before being demonically euthanized. Kuwabara would have thought it cute.

Kuwabara would have been a much better person for this job.

But Kuwabara was long dead alas, and so the ponies had come to him.

Kurama nearly leaned forward to speak to Firefly, but then remembered that, unlike cold, the pony seemed impervious to more than just enough wind to set their hair fluttering about behind them. Talking would be easy-peasy. Trying not to think of how physics was being hurt in new and unsettling ways would not be.

"That's Dream Valley, then?" he asked, pointing in the vague direction of the spark... the sparkling on the near horizon.

"Yeah, we're almost there. Um, I think I'll have to take you to see Wind Whistler first. That pendant was Megan's, and they were, um... close."

Kurama said nothing. That 'um... close' at the end worried him, and he hoped that 'close' for ponies only extended to horseback ridi- okay. There was no way to think about that without some kind of innuendo so he was just going to stop right now.

The rest of the journey passed with tense silence. Firefly was focusing on flying (he hoped) and he was focused on... what, exactly? He had no information beyond The Magical Ponies of Dream Valley Are In Trouble and Need Help. Nothing more. His entire world, right now at this moment, revolved around what could have been the premise of a Sunday morning cartoon for 5-12 year old girls.

It could have been anything else. In fact there was a tiny, stuttering and nearly dead part of him that still kind of wished that, his life of demons and afterlife bureaucracy aside, something really cool like giant autonomous transforming robots would fall on earth and there would be things like high-flying adventure and swashbuckling.

Instead, he got the ponies. Wow, some guys just had all the luck.

"There they are!" Spike, having taking post as lookout, waved his signal flag and pointed to the speck in the sky that was Firefly and, hopefully, their savior and New Friend. He could hardly remember the last time they'd had a New Friend.

Buttons and Sweet Stuff skidded to a halt on the parapet beside him.

"I see them," Sweet Stuff gasped, her voice lost under the clattering happy prancing Buttons was demonstrating at the moment.

"I knew it, I knew it, I knew Firefly wouldn't let us down! Didn't I know?" She punched Spike with a forehoof. "Yes, as a matter of fact, I did know."

Spike forced a laugh and shooed the ponies aside. Unicorn and Earth pony alike clattered back, making room for Firefly and the New Friend to land. None of them noticed Wind Whistler until she was beside them, staring up at the ever-nearing speck of Firefly.

"O-oh, Wind Whistler," Spike stuttered, grabbing and twisting his tail nervously. He may no longer be considered a "baby" dragon, but he'd never really... grown up. No one was more aware of this than him.

"Someone should tell Galaxy," Wind Whistler said, giving a pointed look to Buttons and Sweet Stuff. Buttons sniffed, Sweet Stuff shrank. Both of them got the message and trudged away. Spike watched Wind Whistler nervously. Whatever she wanted to talk about... couldn't be good.

"Do you trust Galaxy?"

Spike kept his mouth shut to keep from stuttering, let the sentence form entirely, and took a breath.

"Don't you?" It wasn't just the stutter that kept him from arbitrarily tossing out that line. Wind Whistler could be fierce when she was angry, and her being angry was becoming a common occurrence.

Wind Whistler stamped, and glared at him out of the corner of her eye. "I trust Galaxy to... act in a way according to her usual behavior."

"So, you don't trust her." Spike sighed heavily. "It was her idea to send Firefly to..."

"Yes, it was."

Heavy silence situated itself comfortably between them. Firefly was very nearly arrived with the New Friend.

"I wonder what she will be like," Spike mused. "Our New Friend, I mean, if she comes from there..."

"Even the Care Bears wouldn't be able to make a child from that place care about our plight," Wind Whistler said icily. For all that they and the Color Kids were allies, they had been particularly useless lately, once the clouds had come. "I'm sure Firefly made it past that border and found us someone worthy of the pendant."

So much for the power of friendship, Spike thought sadly, and stepped back to allow Firefly to land. Ponies had been gathering in the courtyard of Dream Castle, making a rainbow of worried faces.

Firefly clattered to a stop, her passenger, the New Friend, falling gracelessly from her back in a tangle of red and black... stuff.

It wasn't a color combination that inspired hope.

The New Friend straightened and brushed herself off, pulling red hair back from her face. Firefly, after catching her breath, beamed at Spike and Wind Whistler.

"Everyone, this is our New Friend-" she stuttered, and looked at the New Friend, who was busy trying to... did she have a tail? Was that what she was trying to shove behind her? And those ears... "Um, I'm sorry, I didn't even ask what your name was."

The New Friend sighed, cast a glance out over the landscape, and pulled a bit of a face. Spike felt that old familiar feeling of dread return.

"My name is Kurama," the New Friend said, and the assembled ponies, minus a very solemn-looking Wind Whistler, went wild. Some of them charged up the stairs to the parapet to get a better look, crowding around Kurama, who seemed both irritated and unnerved. Ponies by the handful crowded around to introduce themselves. He caught a glimpse of Wind Whistler through the mob as she pulled and exhausted Firefly to the side. he would have stepped in there, but was distracted by the squeals of delight as Kurama was led off for a 'grand tour' of Dream Castle.

Spike sighed one more time, carefully set down the signal flag he'd been clutching like a shield, and followed Kurama and the Ponies down into the Castle.

Licketysplit, Ribbon, Buttons, Sweet Stuff, Heart Throb... Kurama tried not to think of all these as high school hooker names while he followed the horribly named creatures through the endlessly pastel interior of Dream Castle.

He couldn't bash it too much, really. If there was going to be a place called 'Dream Castle' or Dream Valley or Ponytopia or whatever, he'd expect it to be a place with enough pink to supply all the tootsietramps in the world for the next few centuries. The place was very, very much a girl's dream.

He glanced to his side, where the pink 'Dragon' (like no dragon he'd seen before; Kokoryuuha would have shriveled up in embarrassment to be associated with a 'dragon' such as this) was ambling along beside him. 'Spike' had apparently grown up with the ponies, effectively providing a massive argument for the Nurture park of the Nature versus Nurture debates. Either that or he was a Dragon who had gotten a firm F in being an actual dragon.

Kurama forced a smile.

"I have to confess, I'm not sure exactly what I'm supposed to be doing here," he said, trying to strike up a conversation that wouldn't be variations of 'tee-hee' and 'gosh.'

"Well," Spike scratched behind an ear, glancing Kurama up and down. Kurama guessed the dragon couldn't quite get over the ears and the tail. "To be honest, neither do I. We're just relying on the old formula of send out the pendant and hope the right person comes back."

Kurama inclined his head and forced the smile to stay on. "I see. And... this has worked before?"

Spike nodded solemnly. "With our first Friend, Megan. She helped save the Ponies from Midnight Castle, and brought me here. She was wonderful." His overlarge eyes had gone misty with nostalgia. He lifted a claw and, to Kurama's horror, wiped away a single, crystalline tear. When the dragon flicked the tear away, it melted into the decorations of the Castle like it was meant to be there.

Oh great gods. Kurama's jaw fell open slightly. They bedazzled this place with their tears.

Spike sniffed, and then rallied, smiling encouragingly down at Kurama, who wanted to find a dark hole to climb into and die. "Don't worry. You have to be Pure of Heart to carry the pendant. You'll be just fine!"

The absolute untruth of that statement should have caused the world to cave in with the sheer power of its dishonesty. There was not so much as a stirring of breeze.

Kurama opened his mouth to speak, and was cut off by an explosion of noise. Noise and chartreuse.

"SURPRISE!"

And it was a surprise. One of the pegasi, a white one with eye-bleedingly yellow-green hair knocked him on his ass, hooves planted firmly on his chest.

"YOU'RE OUR NEW FRIEND I BET," the pegusus screamed, it's manic grin instilling Kurama with more fear than he'd felt facing down Sensui. No demon, no matter how evil, fearless, or thoroughly badass, would be able to stand tall and unfettered in the presence of so much aggressive cuteness. Cuteness and a lot more weight Kurama didn't even try. He shrank against the floor and forced a grin of his own.

"Y-yes, yes I am. My name is-"

"Her name is Kurama!" Licketysplit cut in, shoving the surprising pegasus aside. The lavender pony scowled at the Pegasus, who scuffed a hoof sheepishly. Horseishly. ...sheepishly. Something. Wait, she?

"Actually, I'm not a-"

"Listen, Baby Surprise," Licketysplit was saying, nudging the pegasus aside, "Kurama's got a lot of important things to do, like save the world. So you can go surprise the bushwoolies with how surprising you are, kay?" The little pegasus seemed to accept that, and bounded off, followed by a few more like-minded ponies.

Kurama stared. "I have two things to say at this juncture," he said, glancing between the remaining ponies - Licketysplit and Sweet Stuff - and Spike. "The first, though somewhat less important, is going to have to be what the hell is a bushwoolie?"

Licketysplit surprised him by uttering a sardonic snort. "A bunch of morons completely incapable of individual thought," she said with a roll of her eyes. Kurama made a flash decision, and put Licketysplit down on the list of 'Ponies to like.' It was a short list. "They pretty much exist to be soft and cute for the babies to play with."

Sweet Stuff, who up until then hadn't said much of anything, mumbled shyly, "I like them."

Licketysplit rolled her eyes again. "Well of course you do. They're the only ones who don't make you-"

"Let's," Spike brought a paw down between them and forced a happy smile, "just leave it at that for now. What was the second thing you wanted to say, Kurama?"

Awkward Silence lifted up its skirts to run in on cue.

"I'm not a girl."

AN

Oh god why won't it stop.

(edited for breaks/spelling errors. More on the way)