Dear readers,

I know that I haven't posted anything in a long time and I honestly feel bad and guilty for that.
It's just that I simply couldn't write anything down what had to do with Twilight.
After a long time I realized I couldn't let you all down like that.
You have supported me and you have given me courage to keep on writing.
I can't thank you enough for that.

I also can't apologize enough for my long absence.

Sorry for letting you down like that but I'm back and here is the final chapter of Dark Pasts.

I wanted this to be the last chapter since I'm not sure if I will continue writing for Twilight.

I'm now on a vacation so I won't be uploading for my story Even a Rose Can Cry, but I can assure you
that once I go back to my home, I will finish that story.

Thank you all for your support and I apologize for my absence.

Lots of love,

Twilightlovarr

Enjoy!

It was eleven years after Nessie's wedding. Time flew by when you had forever. Everything was going well in our family. Carlisle and Esme were two proud (grand)parents. Edward and Bella were happier than ever. Renesmee had grown and she had become a beautiful young woman and she lived with her husband Jacob in the forest. Esme had built a house for them.

Alice was Alice. Just as Emmett was Emmett. The two were happy, energetic and loving. Only Jasper and I had our moments, even though we both felt better after talking with each other.

Emmett had lost a bet against Alice and now she dragged him with her shopping. Even though I felt bad for my love, he should've known better then to bet against Alice.

Carlisle and Esme were in Carlisle's offish. Edward and Bella were in their cottage like Jacob and Renesmee were enjoying each other's presence in theirs.

We had moved a few years before Nessie's wedding to Canada were we lived for another couple of years. Though Nessie insisted on having her wedding in Forks, were everything had started. Not only was she born there, her parents had met there, we had fought for her mother's life there, and we simply became complete there.

While going back for the wedding everything felt so natural. I've never felt more home then in Forks. But while people were getting suspicious we had to move away to Canada. Carlisle had reassured us then in a few decades we might move back again.

'I miss Forks,' I grumbled to Jasper that day.

We were sitting on the garden bench in our big garden in Canada. Our garden was filled with flowers and trees as Esme loved gardening. Our house was in the middle of the forest with Nessie and Jake's cottage nearby.

Bella was upset that she had to leave her 'fairy-tale house' as she called it in Forks. So Edward let Esme built another one here, almost the same as the other. This one was a bit smaller since Nessie had moved out. Bella didn't mind as she wasn't as fond of big houses as I was.

Jasper looked surprised at me. 'I thought you hated Forks!'

I frowned. 'I've never said that. It's just that,' I shrugged. 'Forks has become a special place since our move to Forks changed our lives. What if we never moved to Forks? Edward would still be a depressing mess.'

'A depressing pain in the ass,' Jasper grinned.

I laughed. 'Jazz!'

'Don't blame me sister. I was the one who had to put up with his emotions all the time!' Jasper sighed. 'It didn't make my feelings about this life any better.'

'Oh Jazz,' I murmured. 'You're getting better, you know?'

Jasper frowned at me.

I shook my head. 'No, don't try and deny it. I've seen you growing over the years. Even though we both have our moments, I can say that you are overcoming your fears.'

'My fears?' Jasper asked confused.

'Your fears of slipping…' I reminded him.

'Oh.'

It was quiet for a moment. I could feel Jasper move uncomfortable next to me us as I brought up the subject of slipping. Even though Jasper had the power to create a calm and relaxing atmosphere but he didn't. When we talk with each other we want to express our feelings. Jasper manipulating them wouldn't make our conversations as honest as they were. Jasper and I didn't lie to each other.

'Jazz, we all are proud of you and we all trust you. You've been surrounded by humans many times and you didn't slip. Even if you do slip now once, it wouldn't matter.'

Jasper's eyes darkened. Suddenly he was on his feet. I looked shocked at him. 'Ofcourse it would matter!' he shouted. 'How could it not matter! If I slip now, after all those centuries, I will look like a fool. I will look even weaker then I already am! If I slip now then there wouldn't be any hope for me anymore,' he calmed down. 'If I slip now,' he whispered. 'I will leave.'

I was too taken back by his sudden outburst to realize what he just said. I just stared at him. Not knowing what to say or what to do. After a few minutes of just staring at each other, I finally found my voice again.

'How could you?' I whispered. 'How could you even say such a thing?'

Jasper bowed his head.

'Leaving?' If I were human tears would come up in my eyes. 'How could you even think of leaving us? Of leaving Alice?' I swallowed. 'Of leaving me?' I whispered. I stood up and grabbed his hand. 'Jasper, we all love you very much. If you slip now, yes we would think you need more practice. But we would never see you as weak. Jasper, you're such a strong person. Why do you always refer yourself as some monster?'

Jasper let go of my hand. 'Because I am one, Rosalie!' he shouted. 'I am a monster! I'm a killer.'

I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples. 'Do you love Alice?' I asked with my eyes still closed.

'Of course, why do you ask me such a thing?'

I couldn't see what his face looked like, but his voice sounded unbelievable and confused. I finally opened my eyes and looked straight in his.

'Do you think Alice is stupid?'

Jasper frowned. 'Of course not! Stop it, Rosalie. Why are you asking me such stupid questions? Agh,' he groaned. 'Just leave it okay?' He turned around and started to walk away.

'If Alice is not stupid, how can she love a monster?'

Jasper stopped walking.

'How can a monster love somebody as much as you love Alice?'

Jasper didn't answer. He was still standing with his back to me like a statue: he didn't move an inch. I wondered what the expression on his face looked like. Probably a mixture of sadness and regret. Just when I was about to break the silence he turned around. He looked defeated.

'I'm a mess,' he confessed.

I sighed relieved. I knew that he knew that he was wrong and I couldn't but smile a bit. Jasper had a low self-esteem. He was such an amazing person and yet he had those thoughts of himself. Though I couldn't be angry at him for that, simply because I didn't find myself an amazing person either.

'Sit down.' I sat down on out garden bench again and gestured to him to sit next to me. Jasper did what I asked.

'Over the years I've learn to accept myself more. Even to respect myself more,' I said quietly. Jasper opened his mouth to say something but I put a finger on my lips and shook my head. 'Let me first, please,' I said softly. 'We already had this talk so many times, but every time we grew more and we became…' I searched for the right word. 'More reasonable,' I finally said. Jasper frowned but I was sure I had picked the right word. 'After several of our talks I became to understand that your self-esteem is kind of low.'

Jasper bowed his head.

'But mine is too,' I said softly. 'Simply because I see myself as a bad person. And even if this life isn't the best…' I inhaled deeply. 'I'd rather have this life then having a life as a human with Royce as my husband,' I cringed when I said Royce's name. So did Jasper. 'In this life I have Emmett, I have a family…' I looked at the sky. 'I wouldn't be really happy if I never died that night,' I whispered. 'So I had to give up my human life to find my soul-mate, to find the place where I belong. 'Even though I never deserved Emmett or any of you for that matter, I was angry that…' I swallowed and looked down at my hands. 'That my life was snatched away like that. I wasn't the best person, but nobody deserves what happened to me that night. Being raped and beaten by the man who was supposed to love you. I think that's the main reason why I got bitter. Because I knew I didn't deserve it, yet it happened. I was unreasonable towards Edward and Bella. I felt that Bella didn't deserve Renesmee because she chose for this life, I didn't. I found it unfair that I had to go through that night while I didn't deserve it: because at the end all I wanted was a husband who loved me and kids. Bella didn't even want to have a child. All she wanted was Edward and she wanted to give up her human life just to be with him. I became to understand her and her choice more. So during their wedding I was nothing but happy for both of them. And then I got that phone call…' I sighed. 'It felt like everything happened again. That night… my first two years before finding Emmett…' I closed my eyes but opened them again when I continued. 'I realized again why I hated this life so much. Because all I wanted was snatched away from me, but all Bella wanted was Edward but she got more. I found it so terribly unfair… But I had to help her. I didn't care about being cold to Edward or being merciless to Bella for that matter. All I wanted was this baby to live. Even though I almost died of jealousy - well figuratively – I wanted to give them something I never could have. Bella always thought that she wouldn't give up anything by becoming a vampire; I wanted to proof her that she was wrong. I wanted her to know that motherhood was something special, something she would miss. So that's why I was so overprotective. But if we could go back in time, I would've done the same. Look how happy they are now. They're family. And even though Jacob and I are not best friends, I'm happy that he had found his soul-mate. He would be miserable right now if Renesmee was never born. And now…' I smiled slightly. 'Now I'm kind of… happy, because if Carlisle never saved me that night, I would've died on that cold street in Rochester. And Royce would've probably never been caught. I had the chance to give him a taste of his own medicine and I did. So I can't but be grateful that Carlisle saved me. I realize that vampires are not cold monsters without souls. Because how could we love someone unconditionally if we didn't have a soul? I believe now that me being a vampire is more of a positive thing then a negative thing. I have a family now… forever. I always thought that killing Royce would be the perfect revenge. I realize now that I already had my perfect revenge: being turned in what I am now. Because I can finally be myself now and I'm content. He thought he had broken me but I have actually broken him. He had nothing then. I have everything now. Even if I will never have a child of my own, I have a beautiful niece and a loving husband. I also learned to give my self-esteem more of a boost. I wasn't a bad person. In my human life I didn't know any better. I lived and thought in a way my parents taught me to live. It wasn't my fault I died that night, I was my fate. I do care and love my family. I thought that being a vampire was a curse, now I think it's the best thing what ever happened to me, because in this life I learned to love. So never refer yourself as a monster again, Jasper. Vampires are not monsters. It's the person who you are that makes you a monster or not, not what creature you are. You, my lovely twin, you are a very special person. You've been through many things but you're still strong enough to protect the ones you love. That makes you not a monster, but a hero.'

I finally finished my story. Meanwhile I hadn't looked Jasper in the eye, so I turned to him. He looked amazed at me and I knew he was speechless. I had finally opened up completely to my brother. Even though I trusted him with all my heart and even after all our talks, it was now that I finally told him everything.

'Rose…' he shook his head. 'I don't know what to say!'

'Don't say anything, just understand.'

Jasper smiled slightly. 'I understand. Thank you for telling me this, Rosalie. Thank you for finally opening up. Thank you for…' he took a deep breath. 'Thank you for healing me,' he whispered.

My eyes widened. I knew my speech affected him in more than one way, but I never thought I would actually help him with it.

Jasper sensed how shocked I was and carried on. 'You made me realize that vampires are not monsters. You made me realize that my turn was the best what ever happened to me. I understand that some people have to go through a lot to get what they finally deserve. We both went through a lot but so did Bella. She went through a lot of pain but she got paid for that. She got eternity with her soul-mate. Just like us. It's not that only your speech now makes me think like this, but you're speech gave my self-esteem a little boost,' Jasper smiled at me and I returned the smile warmly. 'I think I am strong enough to control my bloodlust, or else I would've slipped a long time ago. I think our past will always be there but now…' Jasper stood up and reached his hand to help me up. I took his hand in mine. 'Now we can give it a place in our hearts. Because without our pasts we wouldn't be what we are now.'

I nodded and smiled.

'Now there's one thing we still have to do.'

-Few moments later-

'Look, it's about to go down!' Jasper pointed at the sun who was about to set so the night could start. Our skin sparkled beautifully as the sun shined for the last time at us before she would disappear into the night.

Jasper and I had climbed one of the mountains in our area. With our strength and speed it was no problem and we stood there, holding hands.

Jasper and I have been through a lot of hard moments with accepting what we've become. Thanks to each other we pulled ourselves out of the darkness. We did it. We reached the top of the mountain and we couldn't but be more relieved and happy. I felt like a lot of weight fell of my shoulders and I felt so much lighter.

I snuggled closer to my brother. 'Oh Jazz,' I murmured. 'You've went through so much. I admire you in more than one way. You're so strong. I respect that. You'll always be my best friend.'

Jasper's eyes softened at my words. He placed his arm around my shoulders, pulling him closer to me. I placed my arm around his waist. 'You're my little sister, Rose. I couldn't be there for you that day, but from now on I promise that I will always protect you. No matter what.'

If I could, I would've cried. I wouldn't know what to do without Jasper.

I smiled and looked up at him. 'We did it, Jasper. We reached the top of the mountain. We helped each other to heal and we did. We did it, together.'

Jasper smiled back at me. 'Twins,' he grinned.

'Twins,' I agreed.

Then we turned our heads to see the sunset, still holding each other.

Jasper said it once and I'll say it again. Jasper and I shared a bond nobody understood, even not Emmett or Alice. We were best friends. We were twins. We struggled with our past way too long but we had helped each other to give it a place. We could finally leave the past behind and look forward to the future. We had reached the top of the mountain.

We did it.

THE END

I hope you all enjoyed this last chapter. I also hope I didn't disappoint you.
I also thought of including Emmett and Alice in the end as well but since it's a Jasper and Rosalie's story, I wanted to end it with only them.

I would love to hear your opinion about this last chapter.

Once again, thank you all.

Lots of love,

Twilightlovarr