Eyes on screen, focus, breathe, in out repeat. Don't look, don't turn do not attempt to see. Report, finish report leave. Leave so you may dream, dream as it is the only way you'll sleep this night. Anthony Dinozzo chanted to himself as he sat before his computer typing out his report at the end of a long day. Long week really if one were to be honest. This case in particular hit hard, hit close to home. Closer than any other had before, closer than he could allow the others composing his team to know. Breathe in and out. Impersonal be impersonal this is not you not your fight not your kin. Breathe and report report and leave dream so that you may sleep as it is the only way you'll rest. His thoughts spun again as he gazed blankly at the report mocking him in into cold hard silence the quiet hum of the computer fan a soft annoyance within his sensitive ears.

Victim, if one could really even call her a victim. Lamb to slaughter was more the phrase that came to his mind as his fingers moved monotonously filling in vital information to the closer of this most recent glimpse into the depths of hell itself. Her name was Alana and she never had a chance, 5' 3" a fey creature by any stretch of the imagination. Thick luscious ginger hair. Tony was certain Gibbs would have at least given her a cursory glance seeing his penchant for the cherry headed seductress' of the world at large. That alone would have been enough for the naked human eye to see. She'd fallen before a man nearly twice her size after all, but no. There was more to this story. Much more than anyone would ever know… more than he could ever tell. Sitting back from the glass screen with an exhausted rub to his eyes Anthony let loose a gusty sigh. Easily translated as boredom, exasperation. Almost done, just a bit more. Don't think just type. Finish and leave, report and go. This doesn't concern you. Not anymore not ever. If only he could really believe that. Believe that he Anthony Dinozzo could walk blithely away from this unscathed , completely uncompromised. Miraculously unshaken, lying to himself wasn't a past time he allowed himself to indulge in. For one of his kind it was a danger. One that more often than not had been proven fatal.

"You about done with you're report Dinozzo!," a gruff voice pierced his silent contemplation.

"Just about Boss," he replied flicking a jaunty salute towards his stern ex-marine of a boss Leroy Jethro Gibbs. That was close. He sighed to himself placing the final period on the case report. E-mailing it to Gibbs he pressed the print icon in the upper right hand corner while simultaneously pressing back from his desk with a quiet groan. Thank God they weren't on call for the weekend. He didn't think he could hold it together for much longer. Setting his printed report to rights with a firm tap and stapling the top he strode to Gibbs' desk threw a lascivious wink at a still busy Kate Todd and tossed it before him. "That's all she wrote boss. See ya on Monday. Got a wild one tonight," he smiled turning to walk towards the elevator his focus on the double grey doors his eyes never once straying to the hunched over figure of one Timothy McGee. He couldn't chance it. Not today. It was too close to the surface , too raw. He'd come to far to loose it for mere convenience.

One more step. One last line to end the show for the week. "Have fun slaying dragons Mcgeek!" he tossed over his shoulder entering the elevator with a relieved sigh. Then he was gone. Down to the garage, he exited striding with purpose. His hands began to shake and his breath picked up as he struggled to breathe past the righteous anger building within his chest. Unforgivable, Alana's death was unforgivable and unnecessary. The age old truth laid before him by his mother rang true once more. Humans were not to be trusted. They were irrational, volatile and without honor. In the end a friendship would afford on of his kind companionship, but never peace. Love, well that was simply out of the equation. Not even to be addressed, thought about, or risked.

In and out breath. Tony coached himself his white knuckled fists clutching fiercely at the steering wheel of his precious convertible. Another day, the show must go on. No one knew. No one could know, would know. With one last deep breath he started his car and pulled out of the naval yard.