So.
It was over.
He could feel it in every cell, every molecule of his being. This body was dying, and it was time to become a whole new man; new eyes, new face, new body... New him.
He'd loved being this man. Yes, there had been pain and yes, he had faced death and potential destruction on a scale he'd not faced for a long time, but oh... This shell had served him so very well. Brilliantly, in fact. It had been fast and quick and surprisingly tough, seeing him though so many knocks, unspeakable pain and the running... So much running. It had never stopped, this body. It loved to run and run, leaving and never looking back, never looking over its shoulder at what it left behind. Well, sometimes it looked back, and sometimes it wished it hadn't. But still it loved to run and run and never stop.
He'd loved in this body, too, loved and lost. And lost. And lost again, but in the end it had all been worth it, he knew that now. This him had tried to keep such a tight rein on his feelings, his passions, his love. Sometimes it had worked, sometimes it hadn't and when it hadn't it had hurt both him and others, something he regretted. He had veered wildly between embracing his emotions and denying them, hurtling through the universe, putting right what he perceived to be wrong, all wounds, raw and open, yet pretending it didn't matter. But it did, it all mattered, they all mattered and he hadn't said that enough - the grand gestures had been easy, the all encompassing love of life, saving billions with the sweep of his hand, all so very easy to do and to feel. The small and intimate and personal, he'd struggled, fought against for most of the time. And then, just as he was getting used to it, just as some of those relationships had done him good and the rawness in his soul was dulling, the wounds healing - it was over.
There was no stopping it now, it was either go forward or die forever. Not so long ago, he might have refused his biology and ended it all, but now... He thought of the faces that this body, these eyes had loved, of how they had made him better... And he chose to honour them all, honour all that love he'd been given, all the salvation he'd received from so many people. After all, that way he might get to see some of them again, even meet some new loves to love. And the next shell, the next man he was might just love running as much as this one had. Because oh, how he'd loved the running.
He closed his eyes and smiled.
Oh. How he'd loved it all.