I sat in the pew at the very back of the chapel. I had been at the hospital for a week straight, watching over her, waiting for some sort of response, wanting nothing more than for her to open her warm, comforting green eyes and laugh at my worried expression. But that hadn't happened yet, and according to the doctor at the Courts hospital, the probability of it happening was decreasing by every unconscious hour.

I closed my eyes and tried to leak into Lissa's head, just like I had every day since the attack, but again, when I entered her mind, I was engulfed in complete and terrifying darkness. There was nothing there in her. No thoughts, no dreams, no nothing. Adrian had tried to visit her in her dreams, but just like the result I was getting from the bond, he was getting nothing. It was getting light outside and I knew I should probably be getting home to get some sleep since further attacks were less of a threat in the daylight hours. But the thought of leaving her was terrifying. I needed to keep watch over her and prevent anymore damage from happening to her; I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I let anything else happen.

I leant forward in the hard wooden seat. It wasn't the comfiest place I could sit, but there was something calm and therapeutic about sitting in the chapel. I think it was because Dimitri had always found salvation here and therefore I had kind of adopted that feeling as well. I stiffened at the thought of Dimitri; I didn't want to think about him, especially not now. The memories I have of him just bring unwanted stress that I really don't need at the moment. I had enough on my plate without letting the old hurt feelings I have whenever I think of him and when he left me after the strigoi attack on the academy to become Tasha's Guardian get the better of me.

I batted away the old thoughts and focused on what mattered at the moment. Lissa. I needed her to get better. I needed her to live and stay with me. I needed her there to keep me in check and make sure my stubbornness doesn't get the better of me when it comes to following orders of the other guardians at court. I just... needed her. Apart from my mom, her, Christian and their daughter Rosie were the only family I had, and now with Christian gone, I only had her and her little girl.

At the thought of Christian tears welled up in my eyes and made their way down my face like a trickling river making its way to the sea. Why did he order me to take the day off? Okay, I know no one can actually order me to do something that I don't want to do, but I mean, why did he make Lissa persuade me to take a day off? I mean, I was perfectly happy working all the hours I could. Guarding Lissa wasn't like a real job, although I looked after her within an inch of my life, I was still hanging out with my best friend, so it was more like a regular day, it wasn't work to me, it was just... ordinary.

I heard the pattering of little feet slapping against the slated floor, I knew what that meant. 'Auntie Rose, when can I see momma?'

I lifted my head to be greeted by the puppy dog eyes of Lissa's daughter, Rosie. Rosie had exactly the same eyes as Lissa and the rest of the Dragomir family and looking into them was like torture. I internally flinched seeing those eyes watching me.

I swallowed back anymore sobs that were threatening to break free, this little girl had been through enough in the last few days, the last thing she needed was to see her tough aunt who never shed a tear over anything (well, never shed a tear in front of her) break down in front of her.

'Hey sweetie.' I said, picking her up and propping her on my knee. She nuzzled into my neck and wrapped her arms around me. I could smell the lavender scented soap Lissa seemed to drown her in.

She leaned her lips to my ear. 'When do I get to see momma?'

My eyes welled up again but I refused to let the tears trickle anywhere. I turned so that I was facing her, tucking her dark hair behind her ears. She had Lissa's style of hair, but the colouring was all Christian. 'Listen Rosie, momma isn't feeling well at the moment, so she has to be left alone so she can sleep okay? But when the doctors who are looking after her tell me you can see her, I promise I will take you to her.'

'Okay.' She nodded. 'Will momma be okay?'

I looked into her eyes and felt sure I was going to start crying even though I was putting up one hell of a fight not to. Rosie was only three, I didn't want to tell her that the chances of her mother coming out of this coma were slim, but then again I didn't want to fill her with false hope either. So I said the only thing that wouldn't squash her hopes, but wouldn't build them either.

'I hope so honey, I hope so.'

We both lapsed into silence, I, deep in thought, Rosie, asleep on my shoulder, breathing evenly. How I wish I was a child, care free and innocent when thinking about the world and it's goings on. I had come here to find some peace and maybe unload some of my guilt, and neither of those two things happened, so I wrapped my arms around Rosie and stood, propping her up on my hip, her head still lolling on my shoulder.

There was no one here to look after Rosie yet even though it had been a week. Since Lissa had no family apart from me, she didn't have anyone Rosie could go and stay with and the only family Christian kept in contact with was his aunt, Tasha, and she was in Russia or something (I tend to blank any information concerning her and Dimitri) and she had only found out yesterday of Christians death and Lissa's condition, so she couldn't be here till the day after tomorrow, and although I needed someone to look after Rosie while I concentrated on Lissa, the thought of seeing Dimitri after five years apart, was not a pleasant thought.

I straightened as I walked out of the chapel with my goddaughter balanced on my hip. It would be different when I saw Dimitri next. I wasn't the eighteen year old 'child' (as he liked to call me) he left behind. I was twenty three, had an okay paid job and my own apartment. I was an adult, and I acted like one too.

The infirmary chapel was only a short walk down the street from my apartment, so I hadn't brought my car, but with all the training I did in order to keep fit and in the best possible shape I could, carrying Rosie down the road wasn't too much of a problem.

It was light out now, moroi night. Since the sun took a lot out of moroi's, I didn't like having Rosie exposed to it, so I tried to keep under the shade the trees provided on the sidewalk. It was such a nice day, to me anyway. I missed the sunny day's loads. The feel of the suns warm rays, tanning and caressing my skin is one of my favourite feelings. But when you become a guardian you need to give up some luxuries, and being awake in the sun, is one of them.

Once at my apartment I went straight to Rosie's room. When I moved in I had a spare room and made it into Rosie's room since I didn't need any extra space for my stuff and it would be handy for when Liss wanted me to babysit. I carefully pulled back the Cinderella duvet set and lay her down on the bed, taking off her little shoes and socks before pulling the covers over her.

'Night angel. Sleep tight.' I whispered before I kissed her forehead and left the room, heading for my own room, wanting nothing more than to curl up and sleep in my own bed.