A/N: This is turning out to be a trilogy. Look out for the sequal "Indefinite Schism" in the upcoming weeks.

0430 Zulu 13.12.2183

Nevara stood in the doorway of her room watching the sleeping turian in her bed. She couldn't sleep; the day of her departure was at hand. Their whirlwind love affair was at an end. I'll probably never see him again. She was visceral and raw. She didn't want to leave, but she knew it had to play out the way it did. There were only a couple of hours left before they were supposed to prepare to leave. Her feelings had blindsided her. Leaving her once empty shell mourning to be cracked open. She lit the cigarette between her lips and dragged on it till it burned her throat.

Pain to her was the only emotion that made sense to her. Everyone leaves, even if it's me that has to take the steps to go. She'd accepted Commander Vakarian's offer the night before. If the end of the war meant that they could see each other off the field, she was willing to try it. He was only an intermediary. She'd be doing her dirty work within the Alliance. She continued watching him though. He snuggled in to the sheets a little deeper before settling again.

Nevara's ideas of what her life would be were not what she'd expected. The cold ice queen with defense mechanisms set to kill was how she saw herself. In hindsight, she was only protecting herself from the inevitable pain of losing someone close to her. She had friends, but nothing that she would deem as potential mates for life. She'd moved on from positions to posts so often that acquaintances was more to her liking. But now here she was, watching a sleeping body that brought back dead emotions and feelings.

She'd become so consumed with her thoughts that she'd forgot about the lit cigarette burning its way to her finger tips. The burning cherry popped sending a shower of hot embers onto her hand. She dropped the cigarette in instinct and stuck her burned finger into her mouth. She sucked it making her finger feel better. A faint metallic flavor still lingered on her skin. She looked at her watch. Time is fleeting when lost in thought. Shit it's almost five. She canceled the alarm on her watch and walked up to her alien lover.

She kneeled beside him stroking his fringe gently in an attempt to wake him. He purred gently before rolling to face her. He smiled at her as he stroked the side of her face with the back of his finger. Nevara kissed him on the bridge of his nose.

"What time is it?" Commander Vakarian cooed.

"Just about five." Nevara whispered.

"Today's the day, huh."

"Yeah, we need to start getting ready."

"How did you sleep?" He asked turning on the light.

"I haven't." She answered looking down at her fists.

Commander Vakarian grabbed her fists and squeezed them till they became lax again.

"Hey, it's not all that bad. There's nothing that says we won't see each other again."

"The odds are stacked though." She stated getting up from her knees and shaking his grip lose. "We need to start getting ready."

"I know."

Nevara walked out of the room to take a shower. The water was cold. Her body goose pimpled as it splashed on her. It was quick and it refreshed her mind. She slid down the tile on the verge of breakdown. She couldn't take the turmoil. She was divided. Back to civilization, where I can on some level relate or go back and live in misery. She stood up finally seeing that the answer was plain as day. Her life would be like she never met him. She grabbed the towel and dried herself and wrapped the towel around her before walking out of the small stall.

Commander Vakarian wasn't in the room. Might as well get used to it. She made her way to her room and dressed herself. It was a slow process for her. She laid it all on the bed: one layer of clothing, her secondary barrier and then her armor; more defenses to keep people away. It took some personal prodding to even get started. All her components and barriers slid on into interlocking pieces. It had been such a while since she'd worn it.

She walked out of the room with her helmet tucked under her arm. Commander Vakarian was waiting in the hallway and grabbed the helmet tracing his finger down the crack in it. He handed back to her followed by her weapons. Nevara felt so tiny, like a child fidgeting in her father's armor.

"Let's get going." Nevara said

"We still have time." Commander Vakarian told her, adjusting his armor.

Nevara checked her omni-tool again- 0600. She nodded at him. She didn't want to go, but the pickup time was coming up quickly.

"We need to get going. If I have to walk part of the way it's probably best to just get this over with."

"No prolonging the inevitable?"

"No, this is hard enough as it is." She stated, adjusting the load on her back

"Well if you say so."

"I do." She choked out, before walking past him to get up to shuttle. There was nothing she really could say. I don't want to go. Why? Why do you make me feel this way? She stomped up the stairs fuming about the last couple of days, when a voice called out from below her.

"Hey!" Commander Vakarian yelled up to her jogging to catch up. When he got to her, he grabbed her hands and sighed. They were so small in his, nicked and scratched from the previous couple of romps. "I don't want you to go. It's this damn war. It brings people together and tears others apart. Look at what's been going on here. I am the enemy of the enemy, but I'm here with you. I could have done anything I wanted to you, but you rolled the dice and took a chance; as did I. I'm not leaving this planet till I know you are safe and away from here. Do you understand?"

"How do I know that?"

"You've gambled this far in life, what's to say you can't do it a little bit more?"

Nevara smiled and kissed him on the cheek before continuing up the stairs. She was much more relaxed now. His points are valid. Everything is a crap shoot. They walked to the shuttle in silence. There was a stale breeze with undertones of decomposition in the air. They never went to get Lieutenant Gaeto. He was just left to rot. Commander Vakarian got into the front and Nevara sat in the back. She looked around the cabin of the ship and noticed all assortments of ordinance and weaponry. She walked to the console and typed a few lines on it and turned it off just as quickly. They had made it as far as he was going to take her.

"Well Commander, we've made it. Any last words?" He asked smiling.

"It's been fun-" Nevara snorted getting up and heading for the door.

They walked together for a ways. Commander Vakarian told her that he'd go to the next dune, but after that she was on her own.

"Well then, here. I don't need it." Nevara told him handing him her helmet.

He looked at it for awhile. It was an odd parting gift to give someone. She lit a cigarette as they walked. They ambled on together till they got to the sandy yellow dune. Nevara threw her arms around Commander Vakarian. It was probably the last time she would see him. He hugged her back running his fingers through her hair. She couldn't let him go. Her body wouldn't follow her commands.

"It's time hon." Commander Vakarian told her as he kissed the top of her head.

"I know, I know." She accepted the temporary defeat and started walking. In the distance she could see the bombed out Eldfell-Ashland mine and a shuttle landing. She turned back to look at Commander Vakarian. He waved slowly at her and stood. His face was sullen. Nevara didn't know if turians could cry- a silly notion- but if they could that's probably what it would looked like.

She turned back at the shuttle and three marines came out with guns drawn. She picked up her pace turning her meandering walk into a spirited jog. Nevara whistled and the three marines turned to her. It was a pleasant sight to be with others, but her thoughts lingered for the person standing out in the distance.

"Commander, it's good to see that you're alright." A black haired marine said saluting Nevara as a smile crossed his face.

"Good to see you too, Alenko. What have I missed?" Nevara responded as she dropped her pack.

"Nothing really, ma'am. We're still making our push on the front line, but we're at a stalemate at this point."

"Well, if that's the case, it's good to back." Nevara stood for a second before looking behind her towards the direction she'd come from. "Let's get out of here. I'm sure the captain wants to talk to me."

"Aye, aye ma'am." Lieutenant Alenko replied picking up her pack as they headed to the ship.

Nevara hesitated and checked her omni-tool. She dialed a few buttons in and got on to the ship. As it took off, she watched out the window. Commander Vakarian was nowhere to be seen. She sighed to herself regretful of going back to fight a futile cause. If we do see each other again, it better be under better circumstances.

Commander Vakarian watched her getting smaller as she walked away. Her red hair radiated brightly in the early morning sun. It matched the din of dawn as the sun burned away the evening clouds. With every step she took, it looked like she was setting the sky ablaze. A plume of smoke wafted into the air and the breeze caught it sending it to him like a message. Its sultry foreign scents made him remember his evenings with her.

Her essence endowed him. He looked north of their location and saw the shuttle coming in. He looked back at her and she had stopped. Oh, Spirits, she's got to go. Give me the strength to send her along. He waved at her. His composure waning as he did it. She turned away from him and continued trudging through the sand. When he noticed the marines exit the shuttle he hit the ground and grabbed his scope to watch. I'm going to watch her as much as I can, until there is nothing left.

They hadn't noticed him but they hadn't noticed her either. They were busy securing the perimeter. A shrill whistle came out and it echoed along the dunes. He kept watching as Nevara made contact with a tall male. He's not bad looking. They would make a good match. Commander Vakarian's heart sank deeper. It was unbearable for him to watch. Nevara looked right him. Like she knew he was still there. Good-bye dear, Angel. He kept watching for what felt like an eternity. The tall male grabbed Nevara's pack and he walked away to get into the shuttle. Nevara fumbled around with her omni-tool and walked onto the shuttle.

It killed him to see her go. For the best, only for the best. The shuttle fired up and slowly drifted through the clouds till there was nothing left to see. Commander Vakarian was alone with his thoughts. Her scent had finally dissipated, any ghost of her was now gone. He leapt from his prone position and slung his rifle back over his shoulder. Dusting his armor off he looked down at the cracked helmet that she'd given him. The sun had burned away the beautiful dawn and the warmth of it felt good on his skin.

He was empty though as he started walking back to the listening post. It felt like a death march. His heartbeat slow and diligent sank further as he walked back down the stairs. It's time to shut down everything and move on. He moved through the rooms erasing every existence of Nevara's presence. The sheets were removed from the bed. Blood of varying sizes and dimensions stained the spread. Everything that was bad and evil with the galaxy was diminished in the couple of hours he'd spent in that bed in their intimate moments. He shook off the memories and carried everything upstairs. Fire would destroy any remnants of their interludes. He set everything on fire and watched as the charred remains fluttered away by the breeze.

Commander Vakarian locked down the listening post before walking to his vessel. Tucked under his arm was Commander Shepard's helmet, which he tucked into his own pack for safe keeping. When he fired up the engines a familiar voice rang out from behind him.

"Commander Vakarian, I know I've known you for a few short days, but those days good and bad were the best that I've had. Be careful out there. One day, hopefully when this is all over, we'll see each other off the battlefield."

Commander Vakarian turned and walked over to the console. There she sat looking at him. The message repeated again and he was fixated on every word she said. He finally clicked off the console and resumed take off procedures. A return trip to turian space and a debriefing before his next assignment were the last thing he wanted to deal with.

Damn this war. Damn it for bringing people together and tearing them apart. Damn my own sentimentality. Damn that woman for making me feel anything.

A/N: Indefinite Schism is up and going. Find out what happens in the sequel! Thanks for all the support! Hope you've enjoyed reading!