Chapter Six – Pretending? (Posted June 20th 2010)

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I've watched a few episodes of the US version of Life On Mars. All I have to say about it is "WTF?". That pretty much sums up my perception of the show. I mean, its ok for an American show. I was expecting it to be a lot worse. Anyway, here is the last chapter of this story. Thank you to those who read it, and an even bigger thank you to anyone who read it and left me a review or sent me a message telling me what you thought.

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When Sam woke up, he was startled when he found himself all wrapped up in the arms of Gene Hunt. Gene was still sleeping, and snoring quietly. Sam was still naked, and he guessed Gene was as well. He suddenly got the urge to get closer to Gene, snuggle up to him a little. Gene would probably kill him if he did, but if he pretended to be asleep until Gene woke up, he might forgive him.

So Sam scooched over closer to Gene, holding him tightly and pressing his face into his chest. It felt really good to be so close to him, feeling every inch of him alongside his own body. He could hear Gene breathing, could feel his chest rising and falling. He was warm, and even in his sleep he was strong.

He relished the comfort and contentment for as long as he could. But when he felt Gene's body shifting, he immediately let go of Gene and got out of the bed, not wanting to have his morning ruined

by a grumpy DCI. He pulled on his boxers and his shirt, but left his shirt unbuttoned.

"What time is it?" Gene grunted as he turned onto his back.

"I don't know, you've got the clock." Sam said from the kitchen.

Gene looked over at the clock. It was very early in the morning. "Why are you up so early? On Saturday?"

"You're up, too."

"No," Gene said, "I'm awake, but I'm still in bed. You're up and about at seven in the morning on the weekend. I thought you would want to stay in bed a little bit."

"I thought about it, but..."

"But what?" Gene asked, sitting up and supporting himself on his arms.

Sam came out of the kitchen with a glass of juice. "Well, you always got up and left me all alone, so I figured you wouldn't want me to stay if I was awake..."

"I really wouldn't have minded, Sam."

"Well, it's too late now. What do you want for breakfast?"

"No, it's not too late. You could always get back in the bed." Gene suggested.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Sam stood and went back into the kitchen, unable to look Gene in the eyes. He knew Gene was just lonely, and sam didn't mind sleeping with Gene for nothing more than the pleasure of it, but if he wanted to play with someone he needed to find someone else.

"Fine." Gene laid back down. "But I'm staying here. And I'm not hungry, so don't worry about making anything for me."

"Ok."

Gene was totally quiet, making Sam wonder what he was thinking about. Was he thinking about Mrs. Hunt? Was he thinking about the station? Was he thinking about Sam? Was he thinking about food, or the telly, or something else completely normal?

"Sam?" Gene unravelled himself from the blankets and went to Sam in the kitchen, wrapping his arms around him.

Sam, despite being a bit disappointed in himself, smiled as he felt Gene's arms come from behind and wrap around his waist.

"What? Changed your mind? Want me to make you something?" Sam was cooking something in a pan and poked at it with his spatula as Gene kissed the back of his ear. "Are you feeling ok?"

"I'm completely ok." Gene whispered huskily.

"But are you really?" Sam leaned forward and turned the stove off, and set the pan and spatula on the counter, forgetting all about whatever he'd been making. He put one arm over Gene's, which were still snug around his middle, and reached the other back and knotted his fingers in Gene's hair.

"Better than I've been in a long time." Gene kissed down the back of Sam's neck and kept kissing the fabric of the shirt that was stretched over his shoulders.

"Gene, really, you don't seem yourself right now. I don't think you're fully awake, why don't you sit down?" Sam spun around in Gene's grasp and laughed. "You haven't even put your clothes on or anything! Why don't you get dressed and I'll make you some eggs or pancakes or something, ok?"

Gene just chuckled and shook his head, wrapping his arms tighter around Sam, kissing his lips sensuously.

"Gene..." Sam touched his face. "I don't know what you want from me. I want to help you as much as I can, but I don't want you coming to me just because I'm the only one here. Please, put your pants on and sit down. Come on." Sam forced his way out of Gene's arms, instantly missing them. He walked to the bed, looking around and finding Gene's pants crumpled behind it. He picked them up and handed them to Gene, who had found his boxers.

Gene put them on, but it was warm in the room so he left his shirt off. He sat on the bed, resting his back against the headboard. "So, what now?"

"That's what I want to know, Gene. I don't know exactly what you're feeling right now, I've never been married or anything. But I know you feel lonely, and I want to help you however I can." Sam sat on the edge of the bed and hung his head. "But I want to really help you, not just make you think you feel better. Pretending we have something... is not going to make this any easier on you. I don't know why you ended up sleeping with me in the first place, but I don't want to continue it. I know that I'm the only one helping you, but I don't know why it's only me. You have other friends, so why won't you just go ask them to help you? Why are you only coming to me for help?"

"I don't want help from anyone else." Gene let his head ball back against the headboard, making a small thudding sound.

"So what would you have done if I had decided not to help you?"

"I have no idea. I didn't really want anyone's help. But you were there. And I found myself unable to refuse you."

"What?"

"Sometimes you annoy me, Sam, I have to be honest. But lately, anything you say is like... I can't just ignore it."

"But, Gene, that's what I was just about to say to you." Sam looked up and into Gene's eyes. "I was going to say that, I didn't want to keep having sex with you, but that that really didn't matter, because I'd never be able to tell you no. If you asked me to, I'd do anything, simply because it was you asking. It's like I have no sense of self-preservation if you're here."

"This isn't good. Come over here." Gene extended his hand. "Sam."

Sam hesitated, but eventually gave in and grabbed Gene's hand. He was going to get up and sit closer to Gene, but Gene wasn't having that. When Sam stood, he was forcefully pulled back down on Gene's lap. Sam was standing on his knees with his legs on either side of Gene. Gene's hands were on his hips, and his own hands were pulling Gene's hair as they kissed lustfully.

After pushing Sam's open shirt out of the way, Gene rubbed his hands up and down Sam's sides. He kissed down his neck and bit at his chest, leaving small marks that would heal in a few hours. He felt Sam clawing at his back and heard him trying to catch his breath.

He was about to tug on Sam's shirt to get it all the way off him, but he suddenly tasted something salty on the skin where he was kissing.

He stopped abruptly, and looked up at Sam's face that was only slightly damp with tears. He reached both his hands up to hold Sam's face. Sam closed his eyes, slightly out of shame and slightly out of pleasure.

"Sam..." Gene didn't know what to say. He didn't know if he should say anything. "Why... why are you..." He was truly concerned, but was worried he might not be showing it enough. Or that he might be showing it too much.

"Oh..." Sam said, as if he hadn't noticed he was crying. "Just give me a second." He used his shirtsleeve to dry his eyes and the rest of his face, squeezing the last of the tears out when his face was hidden from Gene. "There," he said when he put his arm down, "all done."

"Sam, please, if you need me to stop, just tell me. I don't want to hurt you or... force you or anything."

"You're not forcing me, Gene. You don't understand what I said earlier. I cannot say no to you. I can't... it's not that I... I just can't resist you, Gene."

"I guess that makes two of us, then." Gene said, lifting Sam's head a little.

"Huh?" Sam said as his eyes opened.

"You can be so oblivious, Sam." Gene grabbed Sam's shirt and buttoned it all the way to the top. He took Sam's hands in his and held them in his lap. He played with Sam's fingers, stalling. Finally, he slid his eyes up to meet Sam's. "Do you really think that I would sleep with any random bloke that I got drunk with?" He rubbed Sam's cheek with the back of his hand.

Sam pressed his hand against Gene's, holding it against his face. "I don't..."

"Shh, let me talk now. When you first came here, you messed everything up. My whole team hated you, and I admit I wondered if you had showed up just to make my life miserable. But, Sam, you are so... well, you're attractive for one thing, which is not something I normally think about fellows. And I eventually liked having you around, even looked forward to arguing with you just so we could talk." Gene rubbed Sam's exposed legs, trying to relax him. "I was... very confused to say the least, when I started thinking about you. Not just a little thought here and there, but all the time, Sam. I think about you a lot, and that night, I just couldn't hold it in any more. I needed to have you. And afterward, I thought it would go away, but it was just the opposite. I thought about you more, couldn't get you out of my head. And things were going downhill with the wife, I suspected it would end for real this time, so I didn't see any harm in getting closer to you. And then, I got that note, and I was devastated. I mean, she was my wife after all. But it didn't last long, because I remembered I had you..."

"Gene, I don't know what you want me to say..." Sam leaned forward, looking right into Gene's eyes, looking for something. A sign, maybe, a sign that he was telling the truth.

"I don't want you to say anything. Yet." Gene kept rubbing Sam's legs, feeling their light warmth and faint muscle. "Sam, I know you like me, you told me so, I remember. And I know what I said about it not mattering whether we liked each other or not, and that I didn't want to have a relationship with you. But you have to understand that I couldn't just leave everything in my life behind for you. There were some things I had to set straight, people I couldn't let get hurt. Only I didn't think I'd be hurting you in the process. I never thought it was hurting you so badly, and I'm so sorry, Sam."

"Sorry?"

"For making you think I didn't like you, for making you think I didn't want you. That was bullshit, all of it. I didn't know it was going to hurt you, but I can tell it is. It may have taken me a while to see it, but I see it now and I want to make it up to you."

"Gene, you don't have to do this. You're going through hard times, you shouldn't have to worry about me." Sam rested his head on Gene's shoulder.

Gene cautiously wrapped his arms loosely around Sam's back, rubbing him a few times to calm him down. "I'm not just saying this to make you feel better, Sam, I'm not that kind of a person. You know that."

"You mean it, then? You like me?"

"Of course I like you, Sam." Gene hugged him a little closer, a little tighter.

"And, you... you want..." Sam almost choked and couldn't finish.

"I want to be with you. I want it so much. And I see how it's been affecting you, and I don't care about anything anymore. I just want to keep you happy, and I don't want you to cry, especially if it's my fault."

"Gene..." Sam wrapped his arms around Gene and kissed him so deeply, so emotionally, his head was spinning. He pulled away and noticed he was crying again, with more force than the last time.

"Sam, please don't cry any more. I really mean everything I said, every word,..."

"Gene, I know, I believe you. I don't know why I'm crying this time. My brain is just overwhelmed. I'm happy, really I am." Sam was smiling through the relentless tears.

"I should have expected you'd even cry when the man you love says he wants to be with you."

Sam gasped at the word 'love'. "I never said I..."

"Sam, did you hear yourself last night? Nobody ever lets out a scream like that when they're with me. Ever. You were either in love or had really bad gas."

Sam laughed and stopped crying at last. "There's my Gene."

"So," Gene said, pulling them back into a serious moment, "which is it? Gas or..."

"Oh, Gene," Sam hugged himself as close to Gene as possible, he was squeezing so hard he thought he might actually squish him, but he noticed he was at risk of being Squished by Gene as well, so he didn't worry about it. "there's no point in denying it, not to myself or you. I love you Gene, I love you and I..."

"Sam, that's all you needed to say. I don't know if I love you too, but if you keep me here long enough, who knows what might happen." Gene pushed his lips against Sam's and laughed to himself when he felt Sam crying again.

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AUTHOR'S NOTE: That's the end! Sam and Gene. Such a cute couple. So, review, tell me your thoughts on the ending, suggest other story ideas (if you think I should keep writing, that is.) And, if you liked it, please feel free to check out my other three stories (Out Of Death, Crazy Lovers, and Friendship And Heartbreak) and check back for new stories as I might write more.