Author's note: Molossia is a micronation in Nevada, USA. The information for this story is taken from their website, with some corroboration from other websites. If you look up Molossia, you will also find links to a hilarious movie of a mock-invasion by the crew of the That Guy With The Glasses review site. Go watch it.

Summary: A micronation, a former nation, and attack iguanas, oh my.

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The meeting had been going on for hours now. America was blathering on about this or that idea, England was yelling at America, Japan was agreeing with everyone, France was hitting on the female nations (and some of the males, too), Russia was being creepy, Canada was invisible, Germany was trying to establish some order (and failing) ...all pretty much the usual state of affairs at these meetings where the major nations were concerned.

At the other end of the massive table were the minor nations, the ones mostly unnoticed by the rest of the world. Tajikistan, Liberia, Ecuador, and Luxembourg were playing poker. Qatar was writing a novel. Azerbaijan was watching movies on his PSP. Cote D'Ivoire was playing tic tac toe with Senegal. And Prussia, relegated to this end of the table after his country's dissolution, was trying to ignore the fact that Molossia kept throwing crumpled wads of paper at him.

On his head, Gilbird squawked a protest as a projectile ruffled some feathers. Gilbert frowned.

"What is your problem?" He hissed at the micronation sitting further down the table.

The young man shrugged in response. "Was bored. And seeing as we're technically at war, I figured I might as well pester you to pass the time."

This caught the attention of Seychelles, several seats away. "At war?" She blinked. "You two are at war?"

Molossia grinned. "Yup. Have been since 1983."

Prussia frowned. "Why? I don't remember trying to invade your vital regions at any point."

"More to the point, how?" America called loudly. Seychelles' question had caught the attention of France to the conversation. And the promiscuous blonde's sudden silence had alerted the other bickering nations that something was going on. "You're not a country anymore, so how can you even be at war still?"

England nodded. "It's not like you have any military to fight with. Or people. Or land, for that matter. Come to think of it, how do you still exist?"

There was a puzzled silence as most of the nations in the room pondered this. How exactly did Gilbert continue to stick around and annoy them when his country had been gone for 20 years?

Prussia and Molossia exchanged knowing looks. Molossia grinned. "You can thank Cuba for that."

Everyone stared at Cuba.

"Huh?" The cigar-smoking man looked bewildered. "I dunno what you are talkin' about."

Prussia smirked. "Ernst Thälmann Island."

Cuba blinked. Then stared at the silverette. "...You're joking. That's why you still exist?"

England scowled. "Care to share with the rest of the class?"

The Caribbean nation grimaced. "Ernst Thälmann Island. It's a little island off my coast. 15 km long, 500 m wide, and uninhabited except for the odd tourist. Castro gave it to East Germany as a gift in 1972."

"And it was never mentioned in the treaties for the unification of Germany." If Prussia's grin got any wider, his head would split in two. "So technically, it's still mine."

"You must be joking, surely." France looked slightly horrified at the revelation.

"Nope!"

Molossia gave a slight laugh. "Problem is, with no native Prussians there, there's no one to sign a Molossia-Prussia peace treaty and formally end the war. Speaking of which, how goes that plan to teach the iguanas to write, Gilbert?"

The albino snorted. "Nowhere fast. Not for want of trying, mind you. I'll do whatever it takes to make you stop throwing things at me." The other snickered.

The inane chatter continued in this vein until the other nations lost interest and returned to their prior discussions. None of them noticed when the idle banter turned to a whispered discussion of programs to train birds and lizards to attack people en mass and wipe out their enemies.