It's the one year anniversary of Pepper's death. But no one knows that. The press doesn't know, there's nothing in the papers or any form of media; no one watches Tony Stark as closely as would have been. Because no one knows he's Iron Man. Tony barely knows it himself. The amount of missions he goes on had been cut down, due to SHIELD's determination to keep his identity hidden. Tony only uses the suit for the occasional joy ride or time to be alone.

All Tony does now is go to work and go home. If he even goes to work. Some days he doesn't even make it out of bed. Rhodey worries he's suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, or some other psychological term for 'fucked up in the head,' but apparently Tony is fine.

...

Tony lays awake in bed, eyes wide open. Just thinking. Tony does that a lot lately. Jarvis knows he's awake, and after a few moments he speaks.

"Sir, today is t-" But Tony snaps back at him.

"I know what today is, Jarvis."

Jarvis doesn't reply.

"I've been waiting for and dreading this day, of course I know," Tony muttered to himself, rolling over in bed, even though he knew Jarvis heard what he said.

Tony contemplated staying in bed all day, even for the rest of his life, and just starving himself to death. He'd been thinking about that often lately, death. It seemed like a pretty good idea in one part of his brain, while the other part knew that Pepper wouldn't want that. He decides to stay in bed and go back to sleep, before the better half of him chose to get up and do something with his life. He would just cry if he got up anyway.

...

The phone rang at Rhodey's house, and he hopped off a kitchen stool, hurdled over his couch, and picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Mister Rhodes? This is Jarvis." Rhodey sat down on his couch and answered with confusion in his voice. Jarvis had never called him before.

"What's up?"

"I think you should be here today, sir."

That was when Rhodey remembered what day it was. He put his face in his free hand and rubbed his temple. He couldn't possible imagine how Tony must be feeling today. Rhodey himself was pretty bent up about it, but he was always better at putting the past behind him. Plus, it wasn't the only woman he'd ever loved who died. That was Tony's department.

"Sure, Jarvis, I'll be right over."

"He's been suicidal for the last few weeks, sir."

Rhodey froze. Tony's always been the happy one; always looking at the positive side of life, a glass half full kinda man. He was the one there for Rhodey when he sister died in a fire while they were in high school. Tony Stark was the last person anyone would expect to be suicidal, he loved life too much.

"How bad is it...?"

"He has recently been diagnosed to be in a minor suicidal state, and unless his condition improves I would assume time is of the essence, sir."

"I'm on my way," Rhodey said as he hung up the phone, grabbed his keys, and headed out the door.

...

The doorbell rang and Tony opened his eyes. Looking at the clock, it was 9:17p.m.

"Who is it Jarvis?" Tony said groggily, rubbing his eyes.

"Mister Rhodes, sir."

Tony sighed and buried his face in a pillow.

"Tell him to go away, that I'm sleeping.

"Too late sir, he is already inside."

Tony lifted his head from the pillow to see his best friend standing in the doorway of his bedroom, with a sullen look on his face.

"Come on, get up. We need to talk," he said quietly as Tony groaned and pulled back the covers, the arc reactor giving brightness to the dim room.

"Why even ring the doorbell if you're going to barge in anyway," Tony muttered as he picked a shirt up off the floor and pulled it over his head.

Rhodey gave him a small smile as he turned and walked in the direction of Tony's living room, Tony involuntarily following behind.

...

Rhodey sat down in front of Tony's television and clicked it on, only to hear a news reporter talking about how "Virginia Potts, billionaire industrialist Tony Stark's assistant, disappeared around this time last year. There has been no official statement fr-" Rhodey quickly shut it off and turned to find Tony standing just behind him, with tears streaming down his face.

"It wasn't your fault," Rhodey said in a hard tone, as Tony sat down across from him.

"Oh yeah? How was it not my fault? I created a monster, or two or three monsters. Obadiah, myself, and the suit. If it weren't for me, the suit wouldn't exist. And if it weren't for the suit, Obadiah wouldn't have done it. It's my fault she's not here with me."

Rhodey had nothing to say as Tony made a noise that sounded like a sob.

"Pepper wouldn't want this. She would kick your ass and tell you to put a suit on and run your company like you're supposed to be doing. Instead, some asshole that nobody knows or likes is doing it for you. She'd tell you to get over it. She'd tell you it was all going to be okay. Because it is. If you really loved her, you'd do what you know she would want."

Tony's tear stained face looked up at Rhodey at his last sentence. He didn't know anyone knew how he felt about Pepper. Rhodey stood up and gave Tony one last look of sympathy but honesty at the same time, then walked out the front door; leaving Tony to ponder his thoughts.

If anyone hated being wrong, it was Tony Stark. Pepper wouldn't have wanted him to waste his life over her, even though that was all he wanted to do. Nobody could understand the pain he felt, but Pepper would have helped him get back on his high horse again. And that was exactly what she was going to do.

Tony stood up and wiped his eyes, walking towards his bedroom. He glanced at the slept in bed, and part of him was tempted to clamber back in, but he walked right past. He opened the massive closet, and pulled out a suit. There was always some kind of work to be done. He was going to do what Pepper would have made him do. He set the chosen suit down on the bed, and then opened the curtains on the window; revealing the beauty of night-time in Malibu. The light of the moon glistened on the water as Tony looked up at the sky.

"I love you Pepper, and I'm going to try to be okay for you."

...

A/N: My friend wanted me to write a drabble type thing about how Tony was dealing with her death one year later, so here it is. I still really love the first chapter though, hah.