Authorly preamble or something: Apparently when I have two conflicting OTPs my solution is to smush them together in one big pile of woe and unhappiness. Well, the more you know. Name spellings from the manga used, 'cause that's how I roll.

Shadows Overlap

Kain loves them both, of course, in his own way. In a way he's grown so used to it lurks in the back of his consciousness, rarely thought about. In a way that he's aware of without having to consider the details.

He's okay with being used by them, just a little, as a stand-in... because he loves them. In his own way.

Every now and then Aido finds his way into Kain's bed. It's nothing new and neither of them pretend it means anything; pretenses have long since lost meaning. Keeping quiet isn't really in Aido's nature, but he does his best, razor teeth tearing at the sheets. When he hisses Kaname-sama, Kain feels nothing; he stopped minding long ago.

Ruka is more discriminating, and only darkens Kain's doorway on moonless nights. Even still her visits become more frequent as time passes, and each time Kain comes closer to wishing she just wouldn't. He's always gentle with her, careful. He pretends to not notice her eyes shut tight in the pitch black night, her face pressed to his shoulder. And when she whines Kaname-sama, Kain pretends not to hear.

He sometimes wonders if they leave feeling empty like he does, but he says nothing. After all, it makes no difference. He loves them both, after all. In his own way.