A/N: Thanks to Ella Greggs for beta reading a few of these ficlets, and to CalmintheChaos for her inspiration and encouragement.

To start with we have a few all-dialogue half drabbles (yep, exactly 50 words each), with Mal and Simon.

Disclaimer: Joss is boss, I get nothing from this except the pure joy of it.

"You're sly, Doctor."

"Excuse me? No, I'm – what would make you think that I..."

"Cunning as a fox, don't try to deny it. Never woulda' thought you had it in you to conjure up a heist like that."

"The heist. Yes, well, what can I say...I'm full of surprises."

Take Off Your Shirt

"Mal, take off your shirt."

"Huh?"

"Take off your shirt."

"Here?"

"Yes."

"Now?"

"Yes."

"You really wanna…here, in the kitchen? Don't conjure the rest of the crew'd appreciate that..."

"If you won't come to the infirmary so I can check your stitches, what else would you have me do?"

I Could Marry You

"Y' know, I could marry you."

"I-I'm sorry, what?"

"I could marry you. You 'n Kaylee. Things work out between you, me bein' a ship's captain an' all..."

"Oh...of course. Kaylee and I."

"You didn't think I meant..."

"No – no, of course not. That would be absurd..."

"Yeah. Absurd..."