Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any Twilight characters.

A/N at the bottom… (important!)

BPOV

When I woke up the next morning I felt the immediate urge to throw one of my decorative pillows against the wall.

Nothing happened as I planned it - Edward and the fairytale like happily ever after - so I let it happen and smash the pillow forcefully against my book shelf, which turns out to be one of my less than good ideas as all my books, which titles I had arranged in alphabetic order, fell to the ground with a loud thumb. And there are many, many books.

"Great." I sigh deeply and rub my hands on my face.

"It is good that I left. It is good that I left. It is good that I left" I try to convince myself. I have to accept what happened. I don't want to, but what else should I do? Sometimes things have to fall apart to make way for better things. "It is good that I-"

There is a knock on my door which interrupts my mantra.

"Yes?" I ask loudly towards the door.

"Miss Swan? Are you okay? I heard a loud noise coming from your chamber." I hear our new housemaid Caroline saying.

"Everything is okay, please come in."

As she steps in she discovers all the books lying on the floor but does not ask what happened. Instead we start collecting them after asking for her help and she tells me after several minutes of silence that my parents are not at home.

"Where is my mother?" I ask curiously. 'I thought they wanted to tell me what their plan looks like.' I muse as I put my copy of 'Romeo and Juliet' into the right place.

"She is visiting Lady Newton."

"Did she leave me a note?"

"No, Miss."

"Ah… and my father?"

"He neither left a note."

"No, I mean where is he?"

"He is out of town."

"Did they say when they will come back?"

"No, Miss. They just said that you should not wait for them for breakfast."

'Why is my mother visiting the Newton family so early?' I muse but let the thought go and repeat the alphabet in silence as I keep collecting the books.

An hour later, I am sitting alone in one of our many drawing rooms, reading Edward's copy of 'Sense and Sensibility' when Mary, another housemaid, knocks at the door, steps inside and hands me an envelope.

'Is it from…?' I think hopefully and scarred at the same time as I open it quickly, but end up disappointed when I realize 'Not his handwriting…'

'You are cordially invited to our annual ball on the 27th December!' I skim the invitation quickly and look who will host the event. 'Sincerely, Lord & Lady Parson'

After wondering if Lord Parson is the one with the dark haired toupee, Mary clears her throat and states "Miss Swan? There is someone who wishes to see you."

"Who is it?"

"Miss Cullen."

Alice.

My best friend, who I have not talked to since the last ball in London; who I have not told about my departure;

"Let her come in." I sigh and get up from my comfortable lounger.

After a few seconds a small woman with pixie black hair, a murderous expression and furious eyes steps into my living room.

Edward's younger sister.

"Please leave us alone, Mary." I beg our housemaid even though I want nothing more than to use her as my shield because in no later than two seconds, Alice will explode like she always does when she has that expression on her face. I don't even want to recall the time when one of our hounds ate her favorite puppet 'Molly'.

Seconds of complete silence pass by and no one of us makes an indication to break the quietness. Deciding that I cannot bear it anymore I want to offer her something to drink, but she breaks the quietness before me and begins to talk with a surprisingly calm voice.

"You know who told me that you were suddenly missing? Jacob Black. He came to my house and asked me if I knew where you were after your parents apparently didn't want to tell anyone, including him, about your whereabouts. I went to your home and talked to your mother but she just told me that you were visiting your aunt, but I knew that she'd lied. You would have told me if you planned to leave town and I- " She stops herself and took a few breaths.

'It must cost her a lot of effort to stay so calm.'

She steps towards me and jerks to a halt three meters in front of me as she discovers the open book and the written words beside the lines.

'Why did you leave it open, you idiot?' I scold myself and hope she does not recognize his handwriting, but I am sure she does. Edward told me that he often exchanges letters with his family if he wasn't at home.

"Jacob came to me four days later and told me where you were after your mother was desperately enough to tell him the truth… That you were at my brother's manner." She murmurs almost lost in thought, still looking at the book and the handwriting.

After about ten seconds of silence I step towards her and start with soft said "Alice-", but hold still as she makes a step backwards.

"I- I was so disappointed and angry that I didn't even know what to say." She sighs still avoiding my eyes.

I already knew that my actions would hurt Alice, but listening to her confirming my thoughts makes my heart squeeze in pain. I never wanted to hurt her, but did it with full consciousness.

"I know I-" I start and reach for her hand but stop when she looks into my eyes.

I could automatically see the mentioned feelings in her blue, green eyes.

Anger.

Disappointment.

Sadness.

"Do you even realize what you have done? You eloped with… Edward, you- I mean he is my brother, Bella!" She shouts and stamps her foot loudly.

Not knowing what to say I remain silent.

"I thought we were friends."

"Best friends." I murmur sadly as I realize that what I have done could ruin our deep friendship. I think that if I ran away with some unknown man she would give me a lecture about how I could be such a stupid fool, she would be angry but would forget about it in a month. However, the fact that it was her brother leaves a feeling of betrayal.

"No." She chuckles sadly and furious. "No, not after what you have done"

"Alice-"

"Do you love him?" She asks me quietly and monotone.

Knowing that my answer will either make her stay where she is or provokes her to storm out of the mansion I murmur "No, I'm not in love with him."

"Then why did you leave?" She wants to know in the same quiet and monotone voice.

'Why did I leave?'

I have always known the truth about our society. In general, men are mostly married because they need an heir so their line does not die off. An heir who continues their name and business. The wife just has to be pretty, possess manners and should not embarrass her husband who wants to be seen as a nobleman.

Love is not important and a woman can count herself lucky if she found a man who liked and respected her. Most husbands are not interested in their wives' wishes and feelings.

First I did not understand why women marry at all but the sad truth is that marriage is all they have. They cannot heir anything, are dependent and will end up in poverty if they have no one who supports them after her parents died. If women are still not married at the age of 29, they are named "old spinsters" and once labeled in this group it's almost impossible to find a husband because they cannot compete against 18 year old girls who are in the prime of their life.

Marriage is nothing but a business. It sounds cold-hearted but our society functions like that.

However, there are exceptions as well. Some marry out of love like my parents did but that's just a lucky coincidence and not so common. Nonetheless, it let me believe that there is chance for love and I thought I found the man who could give me exactly that.

I found a man who laughs about my passion for butter biscuits and does not think it is crazy, but considers it as adorable; a man who does not care about what other people might think of him and is confident enough to buy a feminine romance book; a man who wants to enjoy his life and lives for the moment; I even think that he is capable to love. Edward is everything I craved for, but my uncertainty won.

What if the people I trust were right about him? That he is not a person who would marry out of love if he married at all. If Edward had no heir, it would not be such a big problem as he would just pass on the title 'Viscount' to his younger brother Emmett. I know that that would not bother him, because Edward loves his brother and would do everything to make him happy and becoming a Viscount is everything a man can dream of.

In short, he is not pressured to marry at all as opposed to me.

"Bella?" Alice asks me again, fetching me out of my thoughts.

"I think it was the thrill." She would never understand what I had with Edward, because he is her brother and it would be just an unnecessary discussion. Even though the trip will have a significant effect on my further life I don't regret it. It were days full of joy and it was a great feeling to escape. So that it was the thrill which urged me to go was actually kind of true but not the real reason. The real reason was that I thought it was the start of a love filled relationship.

Call me a naive, dreamy girl.

"The thrill?" She asks me non-credible with a lifted eyebrow.

"Alice, I should have told you so you could talk me out of it. I think that the fact that it was your brother was just a coincidence because that night I would have gone with anyone who could free me from the whole society thing. It was the thrill to leave everything behind and I did not think about how it wound end. It was just a momentary idea. Please, forgive me." I tell her hastily and sit down on the couch. Lying to her is the best I could do right now…She would not like the truth.

Dumbfounded she sits down on the opposite chair and looks straight into my eyes as she says "You would have gone with anyone? Are you serious, you nut?"

"Yes and I know I'm a cracked nut sometimes. I don't want to lose you, Alice." I murmur and have to hold back a tear. It may be exaggerated but after everything that happened I could not lose her. My life is more insecure than it has ever been and I just need her. She's the sister destiny forgot to give me and if I destroyed it, I didn't know what to do.

After a few moments she looks at the clock and stands up, saying "I have to go home now. My mother wanted to come over to you first and apologize for what my brother did. You know she loves you like a second daughter and could not believe what happened. She wanted to travel to Edinburgh herself first but Jacob told us that he will get you. Why didn't your parents come for you?"

I answered the same question when Jake came to Edinburgh and she repeat his words more or less "My father wanted to come but my mother said that it should be a person who does not want to rip off Edward's head in an instant so they sent Jake. My father was so furious and horror-stricken that my mother knew that something would happen if he went."

"Understandable." Alice murmurs and nods. Suddenly she smiles a bit and looks into my eyes "You know I love my brother but you are the sister I never had. I would have ripped his head off as well for convincing you to accompany him. Later on, your head would be rolling on the floor as well for even going with him but you're here again so thank God my nails can remain clean."

I respond with a weak smile and felt hope when she said that I am like a sister and not that I was like one. Maybe she still can forgive me. That is all I need to know at the moment.

Just past noon my parents come home and ask me to sit with them in the drawing room and without losing any time my mother starts elaborating their plan.

"You have to find a husband."

"That's nothing new." I state confused and look at her curiously.

"I don't think you understand. We mean you have to find one now so your already damaged reputation becomes more or less repaired."

"Okay and what do you mean by now?" I ask them tentatively and stand up, not being able to sit still.

"You will be married within the next two months." She responds with a stern expression and I wait for them to say something more.

After a few seconds of silence I murmur, my whole body numb "Are you serious? The preparations need more time than two months and by the way there is a little problem you apparently did not notice - I don't have any proposals!"

"You do." My father says and exchanges a look with my mother.

"Pardon?"

"What?" Jake asks dumbfounded.

After I have been told about the plan I needed time to think and help. More help than one can afford but in hope I could get it I invited Jake the next morning to talk with him. I also wanted to ask Alice but decided to give her a bit more time.

We were sitting in the living room opposite of each other but after telling him what my parents planned he got up cursing and has paced up and down the room.

"Are your parents serious? Mike Newton and Eric Dorky?" Jacob says and looks appalled like he has seen a flying horse or something.

"Eric Yorkie."

"Whatever, I mean Bella, they are- " He jerks to a halt and seems like mentally catching words which could describe the situation.

"I know." I sigh. "But I don't have a choice."

"Of course you have."

"No that's exactly the point. As long as there are no other people who want to marry a fallen woman and who my father approves of, I don't have anyone else to choose." I sigh and rub my hands against the face, leaning against the lounger.

"And why do these two want to marry you?"

"I know that they have had feelings for me since three years so they are not averse to the idea but I think the real reason is that my father offered a high dowry to the man who will marry me and there were more men who asked for my hand but my father wanted someone I know and not just danced with. I could marry anyone I want but the person will just get the dowry if my father accepts him as genuine choice."

"I cannot believe that your parents are forcing you to choose one of them."

After a couple of quiet seconds he starts walking again.

"Lady Isabella Dorky." He chuckles and gives me a pointed look.

"Yorkie."

"Lady Isabella Newton."

"Both sound strange." I state and close my eyes wishing I would have another choice.

"You really don't want to marry them, do you?" I hear Jake asking me and feel him sitting down beside me.

"Not if it could be avoided." I murmur still with closed eyes.

"What about me?"

'What?' I ask myself and open my eyes to look at him confused.

"What would you say about marrying me?"

As I sit here, I have a hard time grasping the importance of his words and when I understand what he is saying I murmur "Jacob why are you saying something like that?"

"Because you are my best friend and I don't want you to be unhappy for the rest of your life." He answers and takes my hand to his big one.

"You cannot be serious." I chuckle nervously and stand up bringing some distance between us.

"Yes, I am."

"I don't want you to throw away your life for me!" I shriek and feel that the hyperventilating is not far away.

"I would not throw it away. I would be the happiest man on earth." While saying that he had a big smile on his face and stands up making his way towards me.

"You don't know what you are saying." I murmur shakily and go behind a chair using it as a shield.

As he stops in front of the chair, he gives me a pointed look and starts explaining with a small smile "Listen, Bella. You know I love you. You are my best friend and I would do anything for you – always have and always will. Since you started debuting I paid attention and tried to save you from the real idiots. First I wanted to protect you from the less than suitable men but there were too many. Whenever I saw you chatting or dancing with another man I was kind of protective quasi like a brother and thought about if he was good enough. Let me say something straight: There is no one outside who is worth waiting and fits to you."

"You are telling me this after nearly every second event."

"There is no better choice than me. I know you like no one else and think that even without all your makeup you are the most beautiful woman in all London...no in all of Britain"

'Most beautiful woman' If I don't blush by now, I don't know. 'Jake as my husband?'

I know what he looks like but nonetheless I take a closer look at him. Jacob Black is tall, maybe one to two heads taller than me and muscular. He has a healthy tanned skin and short brown hair, but not too short. One can still bury her hands into his silky dark hair.

I have to admit it – he is one of the most attractive men I have ever seen but the part I like most about him are his eyes. His deep brown chocolate eyes who are looking at me with an intense stare.

'No no no! It's Jake for God's sake!' I shout mentally and look away. "I think you ran against a door or something because you are crazy!"

He does not respond or makes any attempt of approaching me. He just stands there and smiles at me showing his pearl white teeth.

'I have never noticed that he has such perfect teeth.' I muse but stop myself two seconds later. I cannot think of Jacob as an eligible husband choice. He is my friend and not some- I don't know. He is just Jake.

"I think I know what you need at the moment." He says and takes a few steps towards me.

"Don't dare to kiss me!" I almost shout with a stern expression and take my arms into the air to emphasis the meaning.

All I get is a loud laughter, another pointed look and a "Calm down" when he puts his hand into his coat and takes out a dark flat bottle.

"What's that?" I ask him curiously when he hands me the liquor.

"Whiskey" Jake nods and I eye it suspiciously. My father loves the drink, but I've never tasted it for myself. After a few silent seconds of musing Jacob sighs deeply and encourages me to try it by saying "Drink. It will help.".

So I hold it to my lips and let it flow into my mouth. "Holy-" I stop myself before cursing and make a grimace as a shiver goes through my body "That's the most disgusting thing I have every had the displeasure of drinking!"

"Are you feeling better?"

"No!"

"Then you need another mouthful." He laughs and makes a hand gesture what says 'Drink it up'

"Jacob, I cannot marry you." I tell him while looking into his chocolate brown eyes and hand him that poison in the bottle.

"You are irrational, Bella." He sighs, takes the whiskey without a comment and puts it back into the pocket.

"Why? Because I don't want to marry my best friend?"

"No, because you turn down the one man who could make you happy, who would fulfill you each wish and who loves you."

"But we don't love each other the way we should!"

"I can live with that and maybe one day, we will, who knows. We just have to give it a chance." He says smoothly, steps towards me and takes my hand.

"Jake? Don't!" I murmur insecurely and warn him again as he bends down his head.

"Let it happen." He murmurs before pressing his full lips against my own.

EPOV

(In Edinburgh at the same moment)

"Great to see you again, Lord Cullen." James greats me as I reach the mansion.

My business had taken longer than I than originally thought, but the very moment it was done I climbed into the carriage towards Edinburgh, eager to see Isabella and to give her the little preset I gotten her.

"Thank you, James. Where is Lady Swan? Is she inside the manner or outside?"

"My Lord, she is not here." He says with a tentative look.

"Then I will look in the garden." I smile and already make my way towards the door but stop when James murmurs, "No, I mean she – she left, my Lord."

'Left?'

"What do you mean with she left?" I ask him dumbfounded and turn around slowly.

He does not say anything, but only hands me an envelope.

Hello my dear readers! =)

I hope that you enjoyed the update or let us that I FINALLY made one =)

A big thank you to my superfast beta bethviolet! She is awesome!

Well, there are a few important things to say:

1) Some asked me if I abandoned the story and as you can see – no, I didn't! I had no motivation and inspiration to write for a long time so I'm sorry that the update took so long!

2) I started to write a new story called "Diaries of a Newcomer"!

A short summary: Bella is an unknown actor and has the unique chance to star in a movie with the famous Edward Cullen, but what happens when everything turns out to be completely different than she imagined and Edward is not like the charming character he is usually playing? Please check it out :)

3) I will update within the next two weeks and reviewers will get teasers!

Please let me know what you thought! You're lovely thoughts are the only payment I get for writing this =)

~ Anna Lina