Especially since Ice stepped aside as Ash leapt at her and stuck out her foot, causing him to trip and go sprawling face first into a mud puddle that conveniently appeared on the ground as he began to fall. Ice Queen and her side laughed as Ash sputtered and got up covered with guck.

"What's the matter, Rash boy? Don't like getting dirty?" Ice chuckled. Then a cruel smirk lit up Ash's features and the mud flew off of him and splattered on Ice Queen, cutting off her amusement as she began to sputter.

"Do you?" Ash replied.

"Ok, no more usage of author powers! Begin true fighting now!" said the generic announcer, who had been brought back to say this one line and vanished since he was no longer needed.

"I wanna fight!" Mike Steele complained. Ash rolled his eyes and turned towards the would-be god of everything.

"Look Mike, I already said it, NO FIGHT-ARGH!" Ash yelled as Ice Queen leapt forward and punched Ash on the chin.

"HA! I draw first blood!" Ice crowed as Ash staggered backwards, but her victory was cut off as Ash recovered and punched her between the eyes, staggering her in stead.

"Yeah, too bad I didn't bleed! Should have gone for the nose, Ice Cream!" Ash said.

"Really, well thanks for the advice!" Ice Queen shot back, throwing another punch. Ash blocked it with his arm. Ice threw another punch and Ash blocked it with his other arm, and then the two of them vanished into a frenzy of punches, kicks, and blocks. The ground began to break and shattered under them as they warred.

Finally, Ice Queen took the advantage by using the lone appendage she had that was stronger then Ash's, whipping out her tail and striking him upside the head. Ash shot backwards, crashing through a mountain, and Ice Queen crowed her victory again and flew after him.

"Can you see them?" asked Goku impatiently.

"They're in there somewhere. But there's so much dust about, I can't see anything!" replied Piccolo, as he strained to see through the dirty-brown storm clouds Ash and Ice Queen's battle was kicking up.

"Hey, we can't sit here all day waiting for them! We need entertainment!" yelled someone.

Within moments the crowd was up, screaming and demanding entertainment.

"This sucks! I'm going to Burger King!" yelled Ginyu.

Suddenly, everyone was silent.

"…….What? They have good food! What's wrong with liking Burger King?" demanded Ginyu.

The crowd moved aside slowly and whispering as nahognos stood, his back turned to Ginyu.

"Dude, you are SCREWED!" yelled Goku.

With his back turned and his mouth not flapping, you could get a good sense of what nahognos looked like. His author form was Future Trunks, before his injury. His back was muscular and you could see him breathing slowly. The author known as nahognos turned back slowly and glared at Ginyu. Ginyu took a step back slowly and gasped.

"Ginyu……..I'm going to kill two birds with one stone." He said slowly

He looked at JAT and she turned on the karioke machine. As he fired up enough of an aura to fly, nahognos grinned. He flew in the air and somersaulted to the stage. The authors and characters quickly scuffled over to stage in anticipation. From the audience, he chose Android #17, Freeza, Brolly, Majin Buu, and Vegeta. 17 took the role of DJ, Brolly went to the drums, Buu took the bass guitar, Vegeta a guitar, and Freeza another guitar. Each checked their instruments and all checked their mics as nahognos walked up to the stage slowly. He looked down, then slowly brought his head back up.

"Yo, we're the Evil Beings and lemme tell ya the run-down. Throughout this fic I'm gonna sing songs. Don't expect them, because they're gonna pop outta no-where. I'd tell ya how many we're gonna play for you, but I don't know. This one is by Metallica, and it's called One…oh yeah, I almost forgot. It'll be in play format." Said nahognos

(Freeza' hits the first chords, 17 plays background violins as in S &M)

(Brolly starts playing and nahognos starts singing.)

I can't remember anything

Can't tell if this is true or dream

Deep down inside I feel to scream

This terrible silence stops me

Now that the war is through with me

I'm waking up I can not see

That there is not much left of me

Nothing is real but pain now

(Vegeta plays his rough guitar spot, Buu plays the bass, and the song is in full force as nahognos puts more effort into the lyrics, making them louder.)

Hold my breath as I wish for death

Oh please Kami, wake me………

(Freeza continues playing masterfully.)

Back in the womb its much too real

In pumps life that I must feel

But can't look forward to reveal

Look to the time when I'll live

(17 plays the violins louder via his turntable.)

Fed through the tube that sticks in me

Just like a wartime novelty

Tied to machines that make me be

Cut this off shit off from me

Hold my breath as I wish for death

Oh please Kami, wake me

Please Kami wake me

(Freeza begins his guitar solo.)

Now the world is gone I'm just one

Oh Kami, help me hold my breath as I wish for death

Oh please Kami help me

HELP ME!!!!

(nahognos screams and Vegeta enters HIS guitar solo, and 17 continues playing the S part of the S & M)

Darkness imprisoning me

All that I see

Absolute horror

I cannot live

I cannot die

Trapped in myself

Body my holding cell

(Vegeta begins to tear it up with his guitar.)

Ki blast has taken my sight

Taken my speech

Taken my hair and,

Taken my arms

Taken my legs

Taken my soul

Left me with life in hell

(The song goes on with Freeza's second solo. The song continues, then fades out.)

The authors were in a state of uncertainty. Some screamed Metallica, others Napster.

"I don't know if they liked that!" whispered Brolly.

"Fine, I'm only gonna need 17 and our little guest for this one."

17 nodded and changed the record.

(nahognos moves in front of the stage, with surprise guest Eminem. Crowd once again half boos and half applauds, but nahognos stops Eminem from flipping the bird. Eminem clears his throat and begins to speak.)

Whatever…

17, just let it run

Aiyyo turn the beat up a little bit

Aiyyo.. this song is for anyone.. fuck it

Just shut up and listen, Aiyyo..

I sit back with this pack of zig zox and this box

of this fries it gives me the stuff needed to be

the most funniest author on this --

(nahognos steps forward and takes over where Slim Shady left off.)

on this web site

And since day 1 I've been cursed with this curse to just curse

And just blurt this berserk and bizarre shit that works

And it sells and it helps in itself to relieve

all this tension dispensin these sentences

Gettin this stress that's been eatin me recently off of this chest

and I rest again peacefully (peacefully)..

(Eminem)

but at least have the decency in you

to leave me alone, when you freaks see me online

in MSN or AIM when I'm eatin or feedin my family

to not come and speak to me (speak to me)..

I don't know you and no,

I don't owe you a mo-therfuck-in thing

I'm not Mr. N'Sync, I'm not what your friends think

I'm not Mr. Friendly, I can be annoying

if you tempt me my tank is on empty (is on empty)..

(nahognos)

No patience is in me and if you offend me

I'm liftin you 10 feet (liftin you 10 feet).. in the air

I don't care who is there and who saw me destroy you

Go email Xing Li, make you a complaint

I'll smile in my room, you're way too late

I'm tired of all you (of all you)..

I don't mean to be mean but that's all I can be is just me

(Eminem)

And I am, whatever you say I am

If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?

In the comp, the PC everyday I am

Xing won't even read my jam

Cause I am, whatever you say I am

If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?

In the comp, the PC everyday I am

I don't know it's just the way I am

(nahognos)

Sometimes I just feel like my father, I hate to be bothered

with all of this nonsense it's constant

And, "Oh, it's his writing content -

- the fic 'DBMessed!' has gotten such rotten responses"

And all of this controversy circles me

and it seems like the flamers immediately

point a finger at me (finger at me)..

So I point one back at 'em, but not the index or pinkie

or the ring or the thumb, it's the one you put up

when you don't give a fuck, when you won't just put up

with the bullshit they pull, cause they full of shit too

When a dude's gettin insulted and writes fics in school

and they blame it on me (on me)..

(Eminem)

and the weed

Where were the parents at? And look where it's at

Middle America, now it's a tragedy

Now it's so sad to see, an upper class ci-ty

havin this happenin (this happenin)..

then attack nahognos cause he writes this way (writes this way)..

But I'm glad cause they feed me the fuel that I need for the fire

to burn and it's burnin and I have returned

(nahognos)

And I am, whatever you say I am

If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?

In the comp, the PC everyday I am

Xing won't even read my jam

Cause I am, whatever you say I am

If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?

In the comp, the PC everyday I am

I don't know it's just the way I am

(Eminem)

I'm so sick and tired of bein' admired

that I wish that I would just die or get fired

and drop from my pen name and forget what they say

I'm not gonna be able to top "A normal day.."

And pigeon-holed into some pop-py sensation

to cop me rotation at Pokemon stations

And I just do not got the patience (got the patience)..

to deal with these cocky infants who think

I'm some loser who just tries to be funny cause I write

with an attitude, and grab on my keyboard, so they always keep askin

the same fuckin questions (fuckin questions)..

(nahognos)

What school did I go to, what hood I grew up in

The why, the who what when, the where, and the how

'til I'm grabbin my hair and I'm tearin it out

cause they drivin me crazy (drivin me crazy)..

I can't take it

I'm racin, I'm pacin, I stand and I sit

And I'm thankful for ev-ery fan that I get

But I can't take a SHIT, in the bathroom

without someone standin by it

No I won't sign your autograph

You can call me an asshole I'm glad

(Eminem)

And I am, whatever you say I am

If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?

In the comp, the PC everyday I am

Xing won't even read my jam

Cause I am, whatever you say I am

If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?

In the paper, the news everyday I am

I don't know it's just the way I am

(17 lets the record go until the song is over.)

The audience all starts cheering and applauding, while nahognos stuffs away Eminem in his little box before he can disrupt the mood. The crowd started to yell for more, but nahognos simply pointed his finger upward.

"Why don't you watch the fight?" he asked.

And then Ice Queen and Ash dove into the crowd in a blur of limbs, knocking DBZ characters into the air like bowling pins as they blazed through the crowd. Finally the paused and more characters flew as their forms vanished in a chaotic blur of limbs.

Which abruptly stopped as Ash brought up his hands and found his fingers were all tied up in knots.

"Dammit. Hold on a second, will you?" Ash cursed, trying to untangle his fingers. Ice Queen, somewhat scuffed, laughed and started another "Nugget" chant.

"I AM NOT A NUGGET!" Ash yelled, hopping on one foot as he tried to bring the other one up between his hands and put pressure on his tangled fingers. Nahognos smirked and pointed at Ash, and Ash's fingers suddenly became untangled, flying backwards and smacking him in the face. Ice and her section exploded in laughter.

"Ok, NOW I'M MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ash bellowed as golden beams suddenly exploded up around him and lanced through his hair as it stood up and became a crackling, furious gold color in an explosive lightshow. Ice stopped her laughter.

"He can go Super Saiya-jin. I knew that-UGH!" Ice Queen gasped as Ash lanced forward and belted her in the face, before following it up with a furious combination of punches, a kick to the sternum, and a ki blast, sending Ice flying backwards into another mountain. Ash threw up his hand and a green ki ball appeared in his palm. He hurled it after Ice, blowing the mountain to nothingness.

"No one is ever dead when the smoke clears." Ash quoted, and as nahognos looked irritated, Ash thrust out his arms.

"RENZOKUKEN SHINE SHINE MISSILE!"

The never-ending barrage of ki blasts exploded from Ash's hands and began bombarding the smoke where Ice Queen had vanished, causing the smoke cloud to grow larger and larger. Eventually it enveloped the authors, but that didn't stop Ash despite the furious exclamations for him to stop. The yells were eventually replaced by coughing and protests by authors to have their representatives blow away the dust.

As the various characters did so, Ash smirked and looked at the vast devastation he had wrought.

"Get up from that, Ice Queen." He muttered, although he knew damn well that Ice Queen would, and probably little the worse for wear. It was the rule of DBZ.

"Hey, you!" JAT yelled from the crowd, and Ash looked down at the young author.

"You meanie! I'll help you Ice!" JAT said, putting her hands together. "SUPER MEGA TERRIBLE HORRID GALATIC BURNING BLAZE BLAST!"

As JAT completed this very long name, she thrust out her hands. However, nothing came out.

"What?" the author said. Ash began to snicker. JAT growled and put her hands together again.

"DIVINE ULTIMATE SUGAR RIPPING FINAL ZAP SHOT!"

Ash broke into howls of laughter when the attack again did nothing.

"Is there a point to this? Because-GURK!" Ash gasped as Ice Queen suddenly blurred behind him and wrapped her tail tightly around his neck.

"Actually, yes. So I could so THIS!" Ice Queen said, and began to pummel Ash's back with her fists, even as Ash furiously tried to get her tail unwrapped. JAT and Ice Queen's side clapped at Ice Queen continued to pummel Ash's back.

Then Ash remembered something Goku did, and opening his mouth, he bit down on Ice's tail as hard as he could.

"YEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ice Queen wailed, pulling away her injured tail and blowing on it. Ash spat as HIS side began to clap.

"Goku was right! It does taste terrible!"

"WHY YOU…!"

Ash snapped his head to the side to avoid the ki blast Ice Queen shot at him.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!' the grouped authors yelled as the blast shot at them, before they were all blown up. Ash paid no mind, as he was already countering with his own blast. Ice Queen zapped above it and thrust out her hands to let loose with a flurry of several blasts, but Ash thrust out his hands and a ki ball grew and expanded over it. As Ice's queen's blasts slammed into the defensive ball, causing both to explode and cancel each other out, the smoke cleared below to reveal the author and their representatives, slightly singed and rather dazed. Almost as if the act confused them, they began to clap again, abet more druggedly then before.

"This is starting to annoy me." Ice said, and then smirked.

"Hey Ash, remember the Tri-Form technique?"

Ash couldn't reply as Ice Queen yelled and then split into three Ice Queens. Ash raised an eyebrow.

"Uh oh."

Then all three dove at Ash and began to pummel him from all sides. Ash tried to defend himself, but was eventually completed overwhelmed and sent crashing back into the ground, causing the authors to snap out of their daze and run for cover.

The three Ice Queens thrust out their hands.

"HEY! WE'RE DOWN HERE TOO-!" Galatea managed to get out before the three Ice Queens began raining down purple ki blasts on Ash and the authors, blowing them all up again.

"You'll live." Ice Queen 1 muttered, and then all three floated back down to the ground as the smoke cleared to reveal slightly more singed authors and author representatives standing around coughing and looking at the crater where Ash had been.

Then Ash zapped out of the crater, golden lighting dancing on his form, and did a bouncing stride across the ground until he reached the three Ice Queens. Before any of them could do anything, Ash bashed the middle one with a jab punch, a right hook to the body, a hooking axe-kick and an energy-charged uppercut, sending Ice Queen 1 flying into the air. Ice Queen 2 and 3 leapt to attack, but Ash stepped back and the tow ran into each other. Ash slammed their heads together and then jumped up and nailed them both with a leaping snap kick, hitting one with each leg. As the two other Ice Queens flew up into the air along with their friends, Ash let himself fall on his back from the leaping double snap kick and thrust his hands up, sending a large golden energy blast after the three. They yelled as it struck them and exploded, and then all three fell to the ground. As they landed, they again absorbed into each other, leaving only a single Ice Queen.

Flipping to her feet, Ice Queen growled and fired several ki projectiles at the author, but Ash leapt into the air and the blasts again struck the grouped authors. As more groans wafted up from the smoke cloud, Ice Queen flew up into the sky, drawing herself level with Ash. Angry that her attack hadn't worked again, Ice Queen thrust her hand at Ash and he was enveloped in a blast. Rapidly pistoning her hands back and forth, Ice made the blast bigger and bigger until it was the size of a skyscraper, before finally stopping to rest.

The smoke cleared to reveal Ash, standing unharmed.

"You'll have to do better then that." He replied, smirking. Ice smirked herself.

"I thought you'd never ask."

Then Ice thrust her hands down and began to growl, before her muscles bulged out to double and then triple their size as she powered up to 100 percent power.

"Oh……shit." Ash realized as Ice finished her transformation to her far more ripped self.

"Yeah, time to beat some out." Ice shot back, and zapped at Ash, catching with a punch that send him cracking into the ground, sending more authors and characters flying. Ash leapt to his feet, but before he could do anything Ice Queen was on him, pummeling him with blows and sending him flying backwards as yet more authors were blasted into the air like bowling pins. Ice topped the pounding off with a roundhouse kick and Ash smashed right through the stage, cracking it in half, before he vanished over the horizon. Ice Queen made a noise of satisfaction and flew off after him, leaving behind the group of battered authors who were only supposed to be witnesses.

"You know, for being forbidden to fight, we're certainly getting beat up a lot." nahognos muttered, looking at the ruins of the stage.

"Hey Steele, why don't you put up a shield or something?" Chelsee begged, as Movie 9 Son Gohan wiped more soot from his face.

"YEAH!" The various authors agreed. Steele turned his head slowly.

"Foolish mortals, why should I help you? If you cannot defend yourselves, you do not deserve to exist." Said Steele coolly. Most of the authors and representatives, except one, did not speak.

" That does it. Steele, your ego has risen too much. It appears I shall have to defeat you!" said a voice. Instantly all the authors turned their heads and whispered amongst themselves.

"This should be interesting. Show yourself, brave one." Said Steele. The authors waited, but no one spoke up.

"As I thought. Someone playing a joke." Said Steele, turning his head. Steele's face was greeted by a swift punch, sending him flying. Steele flew then hit the ground, looking up as a ki blast snaked towards him. He brought up his finger and instantly the blast disappeared, inches from his face. Steele got up slowly. He looked around, quite angry.

"WHO DARES?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? WHO DARES ASSAULT THE LORD OF ALL EXISTANCE!?!?!?!?!" screamed Steele. Once again no one breathed. Steele looked everyone up and down.

"SPEAK NOW, AND I WILL MAKE YOUR DEATH ONLY EXCRUCIATINGLY PAINFUL!" he yelled.

"KA………." Said a voice in the clouds.

"WHAT? WHO'S USING KAMEHAME-"

"HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed a voice, the legendary blast aimed at Steele. Steele's eyes opened wide, but he was still able to throw up his hand to change the blast's direction. Much to Steele's surprise, however, the blast began to turn once more. Steele put up both hands and growled, but the blast continued onward. Steele was finally able to move the blast to the ground behind him, which was unfortunately where the authors were. Subsequently, they all blew up. Again.

Mike dusted himself off, then floated off the ground.

"I'll make you a deal. Show yourself, and I'll assume a form to fight you in." spoke Steele, almost in a whisper.

"Agreed!" yelled a voice. Then an Ice-jin came down to the ground and smirked.

Ash skidded across the ground, then used his hands to thrust his body upward in the sky. Ice landed where he was but moments ago, smashing the ground. Ash swung his foot forward, but Ice just grabbed it.

"Sticks and stones, nugget!" yelled Ice, bringing down her elbow to Ash's leg, breaking his leg. Ash jumped up, and grabbed his leg.

"What's the matter, nugget? Can't take it, can ya?" she smirked

"YAHHHH!!!!!!!" yelled Ash, flying forward. Ice jumped up casually, then brought her tail down and hit his right shoulder with it, breaking those bones as well. Ash screamed out of pain, but kicked with his good leg. Ice grabbed that one and swiftly broke that one as well. Ash yelled, then fell on the ground in a heap.

"Not bad, but now IT'S TIME TO FINISH YOU!" she yelled, flying upwards rapidly. She threw up her fists and powered up.

"REMEMBER THIS MOVE, ASH? HEAVEN SPLITTING VIOLENT LIGHT!" she yelled, firing away.

"YAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ash yelled, throwing up his arm in a last ditch effort to save himself.

The Ice-jin looked like Freeza's 4^th form, but only more….evil. While Freeza's skin was white, his was black. For some reason the crystal formations were missing. That, and he had…..hair. It was long and white, spiking its way down his back. It looked like icicles spiked it every direction. It was even more unruly than a Saiya-jin's hair. This Ice-jin wore very baggy pants, being held up by some miraculous force. He wore a white T-shirt, wrapping around his tight muscles. He looked like an evil teenager Freeza.

"What the…..what the hell are you?" said Steele. The Ice-jin smirked and looked up. To top off his outfit, the Ice-jin had dark stylish shades.

"I'm Hail. I'm JAT and Icy's big bro." He said confidently. He ran his fingers through his suprisingly bendable hair, then looked back at Steele. The watch on his right wrist shined brightly. Steele eyes him up and down.

A stylish Ice-jin? Nani? He even has a pair of sunglasses! A watch! My god, he has Nike's! thought Steele.

"How can an Ice-jin have hair?" queried Steele.

"Well man, I was made in this lab. I think it was by Gero, but that's not the point. I'm supposed to be a Saiya-jin/Ice-jin mix. The perfect being, I suppose. I quess you could call me a Cell, minus the Nameks."

"How can you exist? I never created you!" said Steele. If I can get this IDIOT to keep talking, I can figure out how he got strong enough to almost hurt me!

"I can't tell you that. Did I mention you said that out loud?" smirked Hail.

"No I didn't you baka! Read up a few lines!" yelled Steele

"Exactly. So now I know what your evil plan is."

"It's not evil!"

"Suuuuure….."

"It's not evil! I'm not an evil guy!"

"Yeah. Right. And I'm not a protagonist."

"What am I then? The bad guy to beat up?"

"Yep." Hail lashed forward and punched Steele's nose. Steele yelled and fired up a godly aura.

"No, no, no. Bad Steele. You said if I came down, you'd fight me in a fair fight!" said Hail

"Fine." Then Steele changed form again, into a form that gave Hail shivers.

Ice looked down in victory. She almost seemed to scream, DidIwin? DidIwin? Her body sagged in disappointment when she saw Ash was still alive.

"Damn bug! Get squished already!" she yelled, flying downwards to inspect the damage. Ash had suffered many broken bones, being immobile.

"I'm not dead yet!" he yelled, firing up a pitiful aura. He then floated up and flew slowly towards the smirking Ice Queen.

"Come on nugget, what you got?"

Ash rammed into her with a pitiful attack, having no arms or legs to use.

"Huh?" asked Ice, who was almost forced to step back by the 'attack.'

"I'm Ash the Wanderer! I always triumph!" he said repeatedly ramming her uselessly.

"………You're a loony." Said Ice.

"I'M INVINCIBLE!" Ash yelled, hurting himself more than his foe

"Look you stupid bastard, you've got no arm or leg bones left!"

"THE WANDERER ALWAYS TRIUMPHS!"

"I should put you out of your misery. Obviously, you -"

Ash responded by quickly punching her with a beautiful uppercut, sending her flying. He appeared behind her, knocking her into the ground swiftly.

"Monty Python, you guys are gods." Ash said. Reaching into a pocket, he quickly drew out a bag and opened it, popping a senzu bean into his mouth.

"My motto always way, be prepared." Ash smirked.

"I thought that was the Boy Scout's motto." Ice Queen replied.

"The little creeps stole it from me! Remind me to sue!"

Ice Queen leapt at Ash again, but he leapt to the side and twisted around, wrapping her fingers into her hair and thrusting Ice Queen's head down into the ground with a sickening crunch. As Ice Queen reeled, Ash took to the air. He threw his arms to the side, pumping energy into them.

"This is how you do it! And I should know, I created it! HEAVEN SPLITTING VIOLENT LIGHT!" he yelled

Energy showered the ground like a angry storm, ravaging the countryside. Ice looked up, saw the blast, and ran her ass off. The blast and its explosions followed her, as she ran at her top speed away. Ash laughed and continued his attack, playing cat to Ice's mouse.

"Who's a nugget now? You should learn when someone's playing possum ICE CREAM!" he yelled. Where Ash paying more attention, he would have noticed he dropped his senzu bag on the ground. But eventually the smoke and dust cloud Ash's blast was creating enveloped him. Coughing, he waved it away and found that Ice Queen had vanished.

"Where'd she go…" Ash said, and flew in the direction he had last seen her running.

Steele slowly transformed into a form that gave Hail shivers. Metallic skin sprouted and wrapped around his entire body. Rapidly, His shoulders grew upward, to the point of being a ridiculous triangular shape. His legs were still normal size, but it quickly grew outward, expanding his chest and shoulders. He now stood at about a good 15 feet or so, looking like a robot a child would draw.

"I call this form 'Robot'. It will be more than enough to DESTROY YOU!" yelled Steele.

"Not freakin' likely, man!" shouted Hail, flying rapidly at the robot. Robot brought his right arm forward to punch, but Hail easily dodged and swung his fist to Robot's side. Robot/Steele sagged, but slapped Hail away with his left arm. Hail soared away like a bullet, heading towards some mountains. Steele bent his knees then quickly jumped after him. As they left, the authors and their representatives all got up and complained about dying repeatedly. The suprisingly thing is they seemed more concerned with the lack of entertainment, as both fights moved away from their view. Everyone fired up an aura and flew away, half to view the Ash/Ice fight, the other half to watch the Hail/Robot fight. Hail landed with a thud in the mountains, causing a dust cloud so large it covered the entire range. He opened his eyes. His first thought was he wouldn't be able to find Robot, him not having ki. He growled and was surprised as suddenly from under him, Robot grabbed him and squeezed.

"You may be faster, Ice-jin, but I am far stronger! Now tell me who you are, NOW!" yelled Robot

"I'm yo daddy!" he yelled, bending over and throwing Robot over him. Hail jumped up, firing machine gun blasts at the Robot. Robot was annoyed as the blasts bounced off his shell like bullets. He lifted his arm, and his hand slided apart to reveal a gun barrel.

"Let me show you how you fire a blast!"

Ash calmly walked through the city he had chased Ice Queen into. He had used a brief amount of author powers to take away all the people (on the streets anyway) so they wouldn't get hurt

"Oh Ice Cream…where'd you go? Oh IIICCCCEEEYYYY…come out and PLAYYYYYYY…" Ash taunted.

Then Ice Queen leapt from the top of the small building she was on. A building that was behind Ash.

"TAG!" she yelled, slamming both her feet into the back of Ash's head. Ash yelled as Ice Queen bounced off his head and flipped over in mid-air, landing in front of him as Ash held the back of his aching head, his golden hair slick with sweat.

"You wanna play? Ok, let's play pin the ki blast on the nugget!" Ice said, firing a dark purple blast at Ash. Ash leapt over it and it struck the small building it was on. Ash pointed at the building and transported everyone out of it the second before it collapsed, and then wildly contorted his body as he avoided yet another ki blast from Ice Queen. Turning the contortion onto a backflip, he landed on another building.

Unperturbed, Ice Queen leapt up and the two began another blazing war of blows. The roof crumbled and eventually shattered under the energy the two authors were emitting, and they tumbled into an office, much to the surprise of the workers there. Ice Queen pointed at them and they vanished.

"You're not taking all the nice guy points." Ice Queen said, and again she and Ash began to exchange lighting-fast punches and kicks. Office furniture shattered and turned into a storm of debris before the walls blew out and the remaining top of the building collapsed on the Saiya-jin and Ice-jin.

Then the pile of wreck blew into the air in a storm of shrapnel that rained down onto the streets below as Ash and Ice Queen blew it off of them. Ice Queen leapt at Ash again.

"You know, we're just going to keep wrecking the floors until we're back on the ground floor again…" Ash mused, and then ducked under Ice's punch and snaked his arm under her armpit, gripping her.

"…So I'll just speed it up! ROCK BOTTOM!" Ash yelled, and leapt up and slammed Ice Queen into the floor with his arm as hard as he could, blasting through the floor and driving her through all the other stories as well. The building sagged, and then was blown to piece from the inside as Ice Queen screamed and let loose with an eye blast. As the rain of smashed ruins scattered across the city, a smoking Ash almost lazily drifted upward before he landed on another roof. Groggily, he shook his head.

"Dammit…that should have taken her out…all it did was make her angry…" Ash moaned, and then leapt to his feet as Ice Queen flipped her now massive bulk onto the same building he was on. Her hands glowed, and Ash took that as a cue to leapt the hell out of the way.

As the blasts destroyed another building, Ash fired in-mid air, throwing another ki ball at Ice Queen, but she leapt out of the way. As the building she was standing on was blown to hell, Ash landed on another building, and Ice Queen landed on her own. The two stared for a second, then fired simultaneous ki blasts, blasting each other's standing points to hell again. Thus the two leapt from building to building, each firing at each other at the same times and leaving a trail of ruins behind them as they played their bizarre game of checkers.

Finally, the two were left with just one building. Instead of destroying it, Ash miscalculated his jump and smashed right into it, breaking through some windows and tumbling into one of the apartments. Ice Queen smirked again and then leapt in after him. Various noises could be heard as the two fought through the building.

"Outta my way, nerd!"

"AHHHH!"

"Scuse me lady!"

"Oh my!"

"Heh heh, watch that first step, nugget! It's a doozy!"

"Yeow! Ow, my head! OW! TOE TOE TOE!"

"Move it or lose it kid!"

"Mommy!"

"IIYYAHHHHHHH!"

"Ooops, sorry lady! Didn't see a thing!"

With that last comment, Ash suddenly got blasted out the window and plummeted downward, hitting the concrete and leaving his indentation in it. Ice Queen blasted out the same hole Ash had come out of, and twirling in mid-air, she landed in front of him.

"Ready to give up?" she taunted, as the battered author pulled himself to his feet.

"She's too strong at 100 percent power…I guess I'll just have to turn it up a notch myself…"Ash said, and then yelled as golden energy beams blasted upward and away from in a rising pattern before more golden beams shot down around him and twirled around in a fancy pattern, incasing Ash in a golden dome. Ice Queen threw up her hands to block out the light, lowering it as it faded.

Ash now stood, his golden hair even higher and woven into a pattern of menacing spiked locks. Clenching his fists lightly, he took a slow step forward, then another one, his powerful aura swirling all around him.

"What are you doing?" Ice Queen asked.

"My dramatic Movie 9 Son Gohan walk." SSJ2 Ash said, as he continued to walk forward dramatically, his power swirling around him. "But if you insist…"

Then Ash again leapt forward and blitzed Ice Queen with a cracking knee to the face, sending her shooting backwards, ripping a giant swath across the ruined city and sending her back towards the authors.

"He has gone SSJ2…but I doubt the battle is over just yet…" said the short figure as it watched the twin battles go on. The larger figure behind grinned cruelly.

"The moment will soon present itself. And then we can rid ourselves of that plague upon FF.Net." the figure said, smirking.

Ice Queen flew through the air, crashing into the flying authors. All the writers and representatives fell to the ground in a big thud.

"Sis!" yelled JAT.

"Ow….He's too strong at SSJ2, but I have a plan. Listen up…" said Ice quickly

Ash landed and stared down the authors. JAT stepped forward, confidently.

"HEY YOU BIG MEANIE!" she yelled

"Nani?" said Ash, as JAT was seemingly magically in another outfit.

(Her companions, mainly SSJ Vegeta, Silver Galaxy, Galatea, and Leia3000 picked up 2 quitars, a bass, and drums. JAT's outfit changed to tight jeans and a belly shirt, making her look much older than she was. Her band started playing Vertical Horizon's "You're a God.")

I've gotta be honest

I think you know

We're covered in lies and that's okay

And there's somewhere beyond this, I know

But I hope I can find the words to say

Never again, no...

No, never again...

(Ash becomes flattered by the song and powers down subconsciously to SSJ2, not powered up. JAT continues singing.)

'Cause you're a god

And I am not

And I just thought

That you would know

You're a god

And I am not

And I just thought

I'd let you go

But I've been unable

To put you down

I'm still learning things I ought to know by now

It's under the table, so

I need something more to show, somehow

So, never again, no...

No, never again...

(Ash goes to SSJ1, not knowing it, becoming so wrapped up in the song praising him.)

I've got to be honest

I think you know

We're covered in lies and that's okay

There's somewhere beyond this, I know

But I hope I can find the words to say

Never again, no...

No, never again...

You're a god

(Oh, and I am not)

I just thought that you would know...

(Oh, I thought that you would know)

You're a god

(Oh, and I am not)

I just thought

I'd let you go

Ash's jaw dropped to the floor, temporarily throwing him out of SSJ. Ice Queen appeared behind him and swiftly hit him with her tail, knocking him silly. He fell to the ground as Ice thanked JAT for the distraction. But as they seemingly stood victorious over their foe, Hell was unleashed and everything went black.

Hail lay on his side, clothes slightly burnt. Steele's attack had taken out everything in sight, its destruction running for miles and miles. Robot lifted his arm-gun to his 'mouth' and blew the smoke coming out of it.

"Now you see my power."

"No…..now you will see mine!" yelled Hail, jumping up. He fired up and aura, maneuvering behind Robot.

"KAIOKEN!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed, kicking the rust bucket away. Robot hit the ground and slowly began to get up, but Hail jumped and landed on his back, making him fall back to the ground. Hail punched and kicked Robot into the ground until finally jumping upward, the Kaiouken wearing off.

"FREEZING RAINFALL OF DESTRUCTION!!!!!!!!" he screamed, firing white blasts towards Robot. The blasts hit Steele, sending him flying away. The blasts, however, did not stop. Everywhere it hit became a sheet of ice, freezing anything on the ground for a mile radius. Steele was caught within the freezing affects, immobile. Hail grinning and set back down on the icy ground.

"Ya like dat, punk?" he smirked

Suddenly Robot broke free, sending ice flying in all directions, slicing up Hail's shirt. Hail was only mildly annoyed by the ice, however. The two warriors stared each other down, then walked slowly towards each other.

"I don't think there will be a winner if we keep fighting like this." Said Robot.

"Agreed. On three." Said Hail

"One." Counted Robot

"Two." Replied Hail

"THREE!" yelled both, bringing their fists forward, both in a fist.

"DAMNIT! TIE! AGAIN!" yelled Steele. The two brought back their fists, then brought it back forward in a jab-like position.

"Paper tie! Crap! Again!" yelled Hail. The then both proceeded to play scissors. They quickly played rock, then scissors, then paper, then rock, then rock, then paper, then rock, and then scissors. Soon the two were playing different objects at light speed, it becoming a blur.

"Ohhhhh…..my head…..WHAT?" yelled Ash, jumping to his feet. He was standing in a crater, surrounded by debris, musical instruments, and authors.

"AHHH! SHE TRICKED ME!" yelled Ash, swearing vengeance. He heard a rock get kicked behind him. That got his attention.

Spinning around, Ash dodged Ice's kick, at the same time resuming SSJ2. He engulfed himself and the area around him in his aura, sending shockwaves across the land. Ice looked on through the destructive waves of flame as her foe stared her down, doing the Movie 9 Gohan walk once more. Chills flowed down the Ice-jin's back.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors. The game went on between the two opponents.

"This is getting us nowhere fast." Said Steele.

"Yeah. We need a clear decisive way of determining the winner. Both looked at each other, despite the good 10 feet difference. They both grinned evilly, then turned to look at two stones that miraculously survived. Using some author powers, the two stones became two tiny clown cars. Hail jumped in his, being able to steer with relative east. As Hail drove off, Steele's 15 foot tall giant destructive robot attempted to activate the clown car, and eventually had to use author powers to get going. Soon he was speeding off after Hail, in the biggest race tiny clown cars ever saw.

Ice Queen lucked out, for as Ash raised his hands, Mike and Hail drove past him.

"MASEN-WHAT THE HELL!?!?!??!?!" Ash said in shock as Mike and Hail drove past, and Ice took the advantage to leapt forward and headbutt Ash in the sternum, sending him flying backwards through the group of authors again. Hail smirked and he and Mike vanished into the horizon

"Ok, I'm getting sick of this! Who do I sue?" Chelsee yelled.

"Don't bother! You'd have more luck in suing me for mimicking Gohan's Movie 9 walk." Ash said, running his hand through his huge mass of spiked locks. Chelsee began to complain, but Ash threw her a yam and she promptly shut up.

Then Ice Queen tackled him from behind, slamming a kick against the side of his head and sending him flying forward through another group of representatives.

"Isn't this a great business, Yamcha?" Galatea said, standing in the popcorn stand she had put up after the song had briefly ended so she could sell food to the authors watching.

"I'd say." Yamcha said.

Then Vegeta came crashing down through the stand, thrown by Ash's blasting through the group of representatives.

"THAT DOES IT! NOW I SMELL LIKE SALTY BUTTER!" Vegeta screamed, pulling himself from the ruined stand and leaping at Ash, as he got to his feet. At the same time, Ice Queen leapted at Ash again.

"Sigh, you never learn, do you Veggie-head?" Ash chided, and grabbed the saiya-jin prince in mid-leap. Vegeta's eyes widened as he gulped.

"Not again."

Then Ash spun around and hurled Vegeta into Ice Queen. She fell over with a yell of pain. Flipping to her feet, she yelled as Ash lanced forward and punched her in the face, kneed her in the gut, and then spun and axe-handled her through a huge plateau of rock that had been shoved up by Mike's earlier blast.

"Kamikaze Ghost Attack!" Ash yelled, as he put his hands together in a praying-esque gesture and concentrated. On each side of him, five ghost clones popped up.

"Hi! We're Ash's Ghosts! Aren't we scary?" said Ash's Ghost to Ice Queen. Ice Queen only respond was to whip another ki blast at the ghost. Unfortunately, it passed right through him and blew up the authors yet again.

"This joke is getting really old." JAT coughed.

"We're scary! We're scary!" said Ash's Ghost 1, as he and his companions made various faces at Ice Queen. Ice Queen only growled. Ash looked annoyed.

"Do your job boys!"

"Oh fine. We're only gonna live for about a minute, you might be nice and let us do one fun thing!" Ash's Ghost 1 said, and then he and his companions all flew at Ice Queen.

"ACK!" Ice Queen squawked, and flew off, Ash's Ghosts chasing her.

"Give it up, Mike. You can't beat me in this game!" Hail crowed. Behind him, Mike cursed and wished that he had picked a body that was more suited for Tiny Car racing then mass destruction.

Then Hail spotted Ice Queen flying across the sky.

"Hey Ice! How ya doing!" he said, waving to Ice Queen. Ice Queen glanced down and an idea popped into her head. She waved her hand and suddenly a lifelike mask of her face appeared in her hands.

"Hey Queenie, what are those things-HEY!" Hail yelled as Ice flew down and slapped the mask on Hail, before flying around behind him.

"Hey Ghosts! Look! It's me, Ice Queen, the girl that Ash sent you to blow up!" Ice Queen said, and then flew off.

"Let's get her boys!" Ash's Ghost 1 said, and flew at the masked Hail. Hail pulled at the mask, managing to lift it just as the ghosts closed in.

"Sis, what were you-IYEEEEE!"

Then the first ghost struck Hail, and he was consumed by an explosion. The other ghosts flew into the smoke cloud and blew up as well, causing an ever-expanding cloud of dust.

Behind Hail, Mike Steele braked to a halt as he saw this, and laughter exploded forth from within his massive metal frame.

"HA HA HA HA HA! It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy!" Mike roared.

Then two of the ghosts flew out of the smoke cloud, heading right at Mike.

"I think we missed him in all that dust…HEY LOOK OUT!" Said one of the Ash's Ghosts as they bared down on Mike.

"Oh no." Mike said in a dead tone.

Then he was blown up as well.

"Curses! They missed! I should have given them a higher IQ in place of extra explosive power!" Ash cursed as he watched the events happen from above.

Then Ice Queen zapped into Ash from behind, sending him tumbling forward, but as Ash flipped forward, and his view switched to that of an upside down Ice Queen, he thrust his hands "above" his head.

"MASENKO!" Ash yelled, before he threw the golden blast at Ice Queen. Ice Queen smirked as she reared back her hand and whacked it aside. It flew off and blew up yet another assembled group of authors.

"Ok, does Ash secretly hate us, or what?" Silver Galaxy thought out loud as she wiped soot off her face.

"Oh come on Ash, is that your…" Ice Queen said before she realized Ash was gone.

"Where did…"

Then Ash slammed his laced fists down on Ice Queen, sending her rocketing downward. Ash threw up his hand as his entire arm was enveloped in a reddish pink ki aura.

"Here's another trick I swiped from Tynzien's Saga! NUCLEAR WINTER!" Ash yelled, and then sent the gigantic ki blast upward before it blossumed out into thousands of separate blasts. They rained down on Ice's falling form and drove her into the ground, before she was consumed with explosions.

As the smoke cleared from the Ghost attack, a battered Hail emerged from his destroyed clown car, only to see the furious barrage of Ash's attack heading for him as well.

"I hate this." Hail said, and then explosions consumed him too.

Ash floated down to the wrecked landscape, whipping up a wind to clear away the smoke. His eyes fell on Ice Queen, who was standing, bruised and beaten.

"Huh…you're a good fighter Ash…I expected no less…but I'm not done yet…you want to turn it it up a notch…so I think I'll turn it up TO MAXIMUM! BEHOLD THE TRUE POWER OF ICE QUEEN!" The female Ice-Jin screamed as she raised her arms and set them along with her legs as she began to growl in a way that eventually deepened into a roar. Ash threw up his hands as a windstorm whipped up and belted him with sharpnal.

Then Ice's muscle mass grew even larger, along with her height. As she grew taller, purple-pink jewel-like armour plating suddenly sprouted on the outer sides of her calves, on her wrists, and in the middle of her forehead as her hair suddenly flared up and formed itself into a four-pronged crown-like extension on her head. White armour sprouted on her shoulders and at the end of her tail as her eyes suddenly went a deep red. She grinned at Ash.

"And after I'm done with you, I think I'll have Chaozu as a snack!" Ice Queen said, before a metal sheet of armour slid over her mouth, completing the transformation. Ash stared at Ice Queen in Koola's Fifth form.

"This can't be good." Ash said.

Ice Queen leaping forward and uppercutting Ash into the ground quickly proved his assumption right.

Hail got up slowly, dusting himself off. Steele also got up, but very awkwardly. Hail looked at his watch dangling on barely, his Nike's ripped to shreads, his clothes tattered. Hail looked up and breathed.

"GOD DAMNIT! THAT WAS MY FAVORITE PAIR OF SHOES! YOU WILL PAY, NUGGET!" screamed Hail, firing up a godly aura and flying to the Saiya-jin. Steele looked on, saying nothing. Eventually he got an idea and took off running south. The authors, seeing a champion for their abuse, cheered.

"Has anyone seen nahognos?" someone said, but no one was paying attention.

Ash flew through the landscape, his body rocking up and down violently as he flew.

"Owowowowowowowowowowow………………" he said, eventually stopping, far away from Ice. He shook his head to clear the cobwebs and opened his eyes to see Hail looking down on him.

"Huh?" said Ash, being grabbed and thrown upward suddenly. Hail then leapkicked, roundhousing him into the ground once more. Ash hit the ground, not being allowed any time to react. Hail appeared behind him, planting his knee in his spine. He grabbed his head like a ball, flinging him over his shoulder and into the ground. Ash's body hit the ground then bounced back up, being grabbed and lifted away by Hail. Hail flew quickly to a nearby factory, throwing Ash rapidly through the wall, smashing concrete. Hail grinned, then flew inside via the Ash sized hole.

"This is not my day…."Ash muttered, finally having control long enough to stand up. He looked back and saw the trail of destruction leading to him.

"I don't know who that Ice-Jin is, but my money says he's gonna find me soon, so I'll make sure he gets a nice welcoming present." Said Ash, powering up in SSJ2, shaking the whole building. With a roar and a single punch, the whole factory collapsed, creating a huge dust cloud. Ash floated, waiting. He couldn't see the end of his own nose, the dust was so bad. He felt a slight vacuuming to his right and turned, watching. Suddenly the vacuum was to the left.

"Clever little Ice-jin. But not clever ENOUGH!" Ash yelled, leaping forward and grabbing Hail's foot as he sped past him. Hail stopped suddenly, but not before kicking Ash's neck and uppercutting him. Ash's head flew back, but he brought it forward once more, slowly.

"You're good. Too bad you're no match for SSJ2 powered up." Said Ash calmly, bringing Hail forward and punching his jaw. Blood exploded from Hail's face as he reared his head back.

"WOW! YOU LOOK COOL!" said JAT, looking over her sister's new form.

"Shouldn't you be worrying about Ash?" said Chelsee while devouring her yam.

"Don't worry, my bro's taking care of it. Bro is strong, but I don't think he can beat Ash. Ash will be back, but in the meantime…..Who wants to do another song?" said Ice.

(Ice grabs a quitar, JAT a bass, and Chelsee walks to some drums. They begin to play the Foo Fighter's "Learn to Fly".)

Run and tell all of the Ice-jin

This could take all night

Think I need a Saiya-jin to help me get things right

Hook me up a new revolution

Cause this one is a lie

We sat around laughing and watched the last one die

I'm looking for my bro to save me

Looking for a sign of life

Looking for something to help me burn out bright

I'm looking for a complication

Looking cause I'm tired of lying

Make my way back home when I learn to fly

I think I'm done nursing the patience

I can wait one night

I'd give it all away if you give me one last try

We'll live happily ever trapped if you just save my life

Run and tell the Ice-jin that everything is alright

I'm looking to the sky to save me

Looking for a sign of life

Looking for something to help me burn out bright

I'm looking for a complication

Looking cause I'm tired of trying

Make my way back home when I learn to fly

Make my way back home when I learn to

Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone

Try and make this life my own

Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone

Try and make this life my own

I'm looking to the sky to save me

Looking for a sign of life

Looking for something to help me burn out bright

I'm looking for a complication

Looking cause I'm tired of trying

Make my way back home when I learn to

I'm looking to the sky to save me

Looking for a sign of life

Looking for something to help me burn out bright

I'm looking for a complication

Looking cause I'm tired of trying

Make my way back home when I learn to fly

Make my way back home when I learn to fly

Make my way back home when I learn to, learn to, learn to…

(Ice and her band take off their instruments.)

"That was fun." Said JAT

"I wonder what bro's doing."said Icy

Hail blocked Ash's kick, punching wildly. Ash jumped to the right before leaping forward and head butting him. However, the attack seemed to take as much out of him as it did of Hail, and they both flew back, breathing heavily. Hail's face was so soaked with blood, he could barely see. Ash, however, had only cuts and bruises. Hail was clearly getting his ass kicked.

"I'm disappointed, Ice-jin. Can't you power up or something?" Ash asked in a mocking tone.

"Gladly, Ash-hole." Said Hail. Hail then fired up an aura, increasing his muscle mass greatly.

"Full….power…….for you…..nugget……' said Hail, struggling to complete this power-up. Ash looked on in surprise and casually threw a blast. Hail swatted it away like a bug.

"I have GOT to learn to keep my trap shut." Ash muttered to himself.

"Try again. No, I think I will." Grinned Hail.

"Huh?"

"FREEZING RAINFALL OF DESTRUCTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Hail fired the blast at Ash from point-blank range, sending him flying. As Ash fell and struggled against the blast, ice began to cover his body. He growled as he slammed into the ground, the ice overtaking him and causing a rising wall of ice. Hail smirked and simply watched.

"Sucker. Don't mess with the best unless you wanna get messed!" he laughed. Without warning, the ice turned yellow, then red. Hail's eyes widened as the ice exploded, water flowing everywhere.

"…..No one is ever dead when the smoke clears……." Commented Hail.

"How very true, Hail. Or should I say, NAHOGNOS?" accused Ash, appearing behind Hail.

"What?" asked Hail, spinning around.

"You heard me. That last line was all the proof I needed to figure out you are really nahognos. Two author forms, very clever. However, the gig is up! I'm fighting Ice, not you, and besides, I'll not fight someone not worth my time, with such insignifigant power!" declared Ash, the last sentence laced with heavy sarcasm.

"Hmmm. You're not as dumb as the flamers say you are, Ash. It is I, nahognos. But in this form you shall address me as Hail." Said the Ice-jin.

"Hail. Gotcha. And see ya." Ash said as turned his back and prepared to leave.

"NOT SO FAST!" screamed a new voice. Ash looked down to see Steele's robot form holding a large bowl of jello.

"Huh?" said Ash.

"Bill?" said Hail

"It is me, Billy Butt 69! I challenge you to a fight, Ash! No one rips me off and gets away with it!" yelled the goo.

"I thought Goku ate you! Oh well! I'll finish you off for even thinking you wrote Consuming Madness, you THIEF!" yelled Ash, growing more and more angry. Golden lighting began to crackle around his form, growing in magnifence every second.

"Don't write checks that your ass can't cash, ASS!" said Billy. Fred Durst looked around confused in his house, but resumed painting his toenails bright pink, giggling.

"I'll finish you off! HEAVEN SPLITTING VIOLENT LIGHT!" screamed Ash, unleashing the attack. Billy, in his gelatin form, waved his arms and the attack dissapeard.

"HEY! NO AUTHOR POWERS! You can't ever call yourself an author!" Ash yelled.

"I never agreed to that! And now that I am empowered by being on the blacklist of fanfiction.net, prepare to meet MY WRATH!" screamed Billy, changing shape into a 50 foot tall black demon with leathery wings. Ash looked on in horror as the flamer known as Billy growled an evil growl.

"No way! His power is too much!" yelled Ash.

Meanwhile, the two figures hovered a few miles away, watching it all intently.

"That fool! He'll ruin the entire plan! Quick, let's kill him!" shouted the smaller mystery man.

"Have a clear head, my friend. Billy will be defeated, don't worry. We can simply use his loss for our gain. I would be very interested in seeing this fight………" said the taller

The smaller one grinned evilly, then resumed watching.

"HEAVEN SPLITTING VIOLENT LIGHT!" screamed Ash, firing the attack once more. The attack hit the demon right-on, causing a dust cloud.

"ASH! REMEMBER THE DUST CLOUD RULE" Hail yelled suddenly.

"Huh? Right! KAMEHAMEHA! MASENKOU! MAKKANKOSAPPO! NUCLEAR WINTER! FINAL FLASH! RENZOKENEN SHINE SHINE MISSLE! BIG BANG! DIE YOU ASSHOLE!" screamed Ash, firing all the blasts at the cloud, making the dust cloud larger and larger. To finish it off, Ash held a ball of ki above him, easily as big as the Namek Genki Dama.

"SHEER SHINING CRYSTAL HELL CANNON BLAST!!!!!!" screamed Ash, throwing the ball. The ball went into the cloud, making the dust explode and cover everything in sight. Ash didn't flinch as the dust flew past him, blinding him. Hail covered his eyes and coughed loudly.

"Pant……pant……..pant………..asshole……….pant……pant……" wheezed Ash, exhausted.

"Nice one, ASS! I think I ALMOST got an itch!" yelled a deep voice, revealing itself to be the demon Billy Butt 69, unhurt.

"NANI? THAT WOULD HAVE KILLED A SSJ5!!!!!!!!" yelled Ash.

"Ash, you baka! He used author powers to make himself invulnerable! You can't hurt him!" yelled Hail

Ash growled.

"How the hell do I beat this asshole?" he asked

"YOU DON-" said Billy, being suddenly cut off. Hail flew through the giant demon's neck, spurting blood everywhere. Billy grabbed his wounded beck and hissed loudly.

"TRAITOR!!!!!!!! YOU'LL DIE TOO!!!!!!!" screamed Billy, engulfing himself in a black flamed aura.

"Well, shit." Both Ash and Hail said simultaneously.

"FREEZING ICICLE STABBING BLAST!"

"Huh?" asked Hail, Ash, and Billy. A giant icicle impaled itself in Billy's chest, freezing his blood and his skin. Billy screamed out of pain, rage, and fear as he rocked back and forth, eventually falling forward. In the sky, the Ice Queen blew on one of her fingers.

Ash looked at Billy's frozen body, and then charged up a one handed blast.

"Hasta la vista, Billy." Ash said, and fired, blowing the iced body into tiny pieces of ice.

"You ready to resume fighting or what?" Ice Queen yelled

Ash prepared to leave, but Hail stopped him.

"Ash, wait! You're too weak to fight her! Let me use author powers to heal you!" he said

"I'll pass. I can handle her." Ash said.

"But she's so much stronger! She's stronger than both of us! You haven't a prayer!" Hail almost yelled.

"You'd be surprised." Said Ash. There was a brief silence as Hail stared at Ash.

"Very well. And you have my promise to not interfere. Have a good fight, warrior." Said nahognos, saluting Ash he flew towards the final challenge.

"Now about our duel…" said Hail to Steele. The two walked off together, plotting their glorious battle of laser swords, thumb wresting, chugging contests, staring contest, breath-holding contest, racing by foot, racing by airplane, racing by spaceship, beer-ball…

Ash floated toward Ice and looked on.

"So….it has finally come back to us……" said Ice

"One on one, as it was to be all along….."replied Ash

Ice nodded, moving forward and slamming her fist in Ash's face, sending him flying. Ash flipped to the ground in mid-flight, jumping up. Ice followed his movements and charged, slamming her body into his, knocking him downward. Not to be outdone, she flew below him and backhanded him upwards, back up.

"What is, this, pong?" Ash muttered, before getting hit again. Ice continued to beat him, but eventually she let up, and allowed Ash to be buried somewhere in a nearby mountain.

"Come on nugget!" yelled Ice, before the mountain was literally picked up and tossed at her. Her eyes widened as the rock flew towards her, but she moved her hands to her side. White lightning danced around her as a fiery aura developed, growing larger and larger. Light eminated from her hands, swirling around in a circular motion.

"ICE……………….RAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The white blast exploded from her hands, knocking her backwards. It screamed forward like a bullet, and shaped like one. As it dug into the mountain, another thing dug out of another hole. Ice was barely able to dodge to the right as the energy blast soared past, barely missing her. As her back was turned, the Ice Blast did its job and the mountain exploded, with giant icicles flying everywhere. She turned her head slightly, then brought her fist up as Ash tried to attack her from behind, cathcing him in mid-blow with a backhand,

"That's a no-no." She smiled. As Ash agonized, Ice Queen turned, slamming her fist in his side. Ash gasped for air as she brought back her tail in a graceful turn, slapping Ash. His head flew back, but he brought it up slowly again. Blood trickled down his face, but he grinned.

"That hurt, Ice. That really hurt. Now, it's my turn." He said, very cocky.

His arms and legs became a blur as the two danced across the sky, Ice avoiding blows as easily as they were fired off by her foe. Ash stepped up his effort, but Ice Queen continued to dodge, her body jumping back and forth, to the sides, up, down, back, almost looking like she was doing the machine gun dance.

"YARRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Ash, landing a blow to her face. Ice jumped back and screamed, clutching her face in agony. Her screams gracefully flowed into laughter, as she threw apart her arms and looked up suddenly, tail flashing. Her tail slashed and whipped above her head, somehow growing in length. The tail tried to whip him, and Ash zapped back and forth, the appendage barely missing each time.

In the end, he was too slow, and caught a blow to his chest. The follow-up blow snapped into his face, knocking him to the ground. As Ice watched Ash hit the ground, she heard a delightful *snap* as Ash's bones broke. Ice fell down, not even bothering to aim, and landed right on his legs. An even more pleasant crunching sound came as his legs were totally disabled. With two quick tail movements, Ash's arms were broken as well.

"Well, well, well……..What do we have here? I'd finish you now, but I never could take a helpless…sure I could!" she said cheerfully, lifting her arm and tossing Ash's death blast.

"NO!!!!!!!!!" scramed Hail, jumping in the way and deflecting the blast. Ice was surprised as Hail hit the ground with a thud.

"Bro? HAIL!" Ice screamed, running towards her brother.

"Heh…I obviously need more training…" remarked Hail, slipping into unconsciousness.

Ice's head shot up and turned in Ash's direction. She sent him a look that screamed Look you asshole! I almost killed my brother! Ash just grinned, and used what little muscles he had to move upward as much as he could, a whole centimeter. Ice grinned.

"Come on nugget, you can do it…I'll give you a nice doggy treat if you do!" she said, taunting him.

Ash looked up, a shimmer of gold flashing over his green eyes. Ice suddenly felt a giant jolt, and jumped back. Ash closed his eyes.

"The HELL?" she yelled, as lightning swirling around freely.

Ash's body slowly floated up as his wounds somehow healed themselves. Ash felt organs re-arranging themselves, going back to their normal positions. His bones made crunching and slurping noises as they grew back, rather painfully. Finally, Ash was completely healed. But he wasn't done. He immediately fired up an aura, a bright golden in color. Ice shielded her eyes from the sheer magnificence of it. Fire waved over his body, lighting it like some kind of gigantic Christmas tree. After one wave, his clothes were somehow all back together in one piece. His aura now grew to a good 15 feet above him, and Ice had to step back. He brought his arms to his side, the aura suddenly growing even stronger as he did so. Hail was picked up like a paper in the wind and sent flying, and even Ice was knocked back a few good feet. Lighting raced over Ash's body as he summoned more and more power. Ash's lips parted, and his vocal chords stirred. Suddenly, the world was touched by the voice of God.

"YYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Ash, firing up a godly aura, sending Ice flying. Wind and fire raced in waves over the Earth, destroying mountains in their paths. Earthquakes shook the land, the like of which no one has ever seen before.

The ground slashed open, and the authors, hundreds of miles away, all fell in one such hole. All the DBZ characters were powered up to their fullest, including Goku. Only Goku was able to stand against the wrath or God, saving the helpless from falling into the Earth. He looked in the horizon, in SSJ2, and grinned.

"So……..He finally accomplished it….." Goku stated, drawing power beyond SSJ2 to ensure he was able to stand his ground.

Ash's eyes went completely white, and his eyebrows suddenly disappeared. His face chiseled out, making him look like some gargoyle. A storm developed, but its lightning was knocked away by the power below. Ash's shoulders grew, as well as his thighs. Soon his entire body grew with the sudden muscle mass, adding another foot to his height. Then, there was the hair.

Ash's hair glowed, so brightly not even Goku would be able to see. His SSJ2 hair grew upward, like a plant grows. It grew to about 5 foot, curving and curling and pointing in every direction imaginable. Ash finished his power up by shouting, and bringing his arms down suddenly. The ground gave out completely, creating a crater a mile in depth. You could not see where the crater ended in any direction.

Then it was over, and Ash came down slowly, hovering where the ground used to be. His hair fell rapidly, resting against his back. Ash stood, waiting. Waiting for she who dared to challenge a Super Saiya-jin Level 3.

Ice woke up, extremely groggy.

"Oh……..What hit me?" she said, jumping up. Her mind practically caught fire as she sensed an enormous ki to the right.

"The south? But the only one there is……my god….." she said, taking off towards Ash

"Kakarott…………GET OFF ME NOW YOU THIRD CLASS SAIYA-JIN!!!!!!" screamed Vegeta. Goku did not budge. Vegeta powered up to his max, and was somehow able to move Goku. He was still in SSJ3, but it seemed that he has also passed out. Vegeta looked on in confusion.

"It's like……it's like he went into shock from something…but what could send a SSJ3 into a shock?" Vegeta asked.

Ice flew to where Ash hovered, waiting.

"My…my god……" she breathed

"Now you see my power. Thank you for falling into my trick twice, Ice. If you hadn't almost killed me, I doubt I could've obtained SSJ3." He said heartlessly. Without warning, Ice jumped forward and attempted to punch him. This time, however, it was Ash to catch her blows effortlessly. Ice growled.

"BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" she screamed. Hail slowly came to, then flew over. She looked at him with a look of determination, and he shrugged. He lifted his arms, and suddenly Ice's wounds were healed. Ash did not move.

"Did my brother tell you we're part Saiya-jin? Well, we are. Real special, lab babies. It has many advantages. Here's one!" she yelled, as Hail shrunk into a ball of light. Ash's eyes widened as Ice grabbed it, absorbing it.

"OH BLOODY HELL!" Ash yelled. This time it was Ice's turn to power up.

The first thing you noticed was the cold. A wind came up, frosting over anything it touched. Ash powered up barely, and it melted the ice from his body. The second thing was the wind. Ash, however, barely noticed it. What he DID notice was Ice Queen's power more than double. Her shoulders, legs, and arms all almost doubled. She grew as tall as Ash was, which was very, very, very tall. Her delicate fingers grew into powerful claws, and muscles sprouted that would put Brolly to shame. She smiled.

"I quess you can call this 200% power…" she smiled evily. Ash brought himself to a battle stance.

Kuririn walked around, wondering why every Saiya-jin and Piccolo had all passed out. Then he felt it too. It was POWER. Steele was a bug compared to the power radiating from the south. The only way his brain kept its sanity was to pass out. Soon, only the authors remained. But even they could not take the power being radiated. One god was enough, but a second came that was equal to the first. It was madness.

Ice jumped forward, punching Ash's jaw. He brought his legs up backwards, then twirled and kicked her with both feet. She flew to the crater's bottom, slammed into it, and launched off. The crater grew by two miles in depth. It now stood ten miles from the center of the earth. Ash fired off punches, breaking the sound barrier with every motion. Ice countered perfectly, then managed to get a jab in. Ash was not dazed in the slightest, falling back and gathering ki. Ice stopped and gathered ki in both hands, tossing two balls. Ash did so, the two flying around in an ever-growing dust cloud. The air was soon filled with ki balls, flying everywhere. Both ran into some, exploding a blast bigger than Hiroshima ten times over. Approximately three blasts landed on the ground, hitting the crater. The crater increased its size by tunneling four miles below. A giant wind came up, Ash twirling around, Tasmanian devil style. Ice crossed her arms and grinned.

"Kami, power is good….." she grinned

The two characters rocked back and forth a little, but the taller did not flinch. The smaller fought to keep his ground, but was losing.

"The time comes rapidly. Go. Go and destroy." Said the taller, smiling evily. The shorter one took off towards the action. He put so much energy into his flight, his cap fell off.

The two danced again, dancing a battle of the gods.

"So tell me….what did you do to nahognos?" asked Ash, flawlessly dodging.

"He volunteered to lend his power to me. And his name is Hail when he's in that form!"

The two danced more, until Ice had an idea.

"Your shoelace!" she yelled. Ash looked down, and cursed himself. He didn't have shoelaces! A giant fist slammed into him, sending him into the crater. It increased by one mile in depth. Five to go.

Lightning flashed, illuminating Ice. Her form hovered above the crater, ki charging into her fist rapidly.

"This is a move my brother taught me." She said simply. She began charging up power for the Freezing Rainfall of Destruction blast.

Ash thrust up his arms, powering up. He brought back his fists, and thrust them up again.

Come on, I need this attack! He thrust up his arms, adding more power to the ball above his head.

"HEAVEN…….."

"FREEZING…….."

"SPLITTING………."

"RAINFALL……….."

"ULTRA……….."

"OF………….."

"VIOLENT…….."

"DESTRUCTION!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The two combatants fired their most powerful blasts, which met in the middle. Both were dug back. In Ash's case, it meant he was up to his waist in rock. They both sweated, re-arranging their hold for maximum results. Lighting wrapped around both and soared to the middle, sending off tiny explosions of light. Ice began to growl, thrusting more power.

Gogeta woke up first.

"NANI? OH KAMI! IT'S REALLY HAPPENING!" he yelled, jumping up. The second he did so, a seeminly invisible force knocked him back down again. He howled in pain. Veggeto also stood up, but was knocked down. Both fusions stared long and hard at each other. They growled, and frantically jumped up. Again, they fell again. They both began powering up, screaming and hollering like the possessed, and jumping up, only to be knocked back down. Despite this, they both relentlessly competed to see who would be most worthy to stand up. Neither looked like he would win, yet both tried like mad. Vegeta woke up, and stared. Goku also stirred.

"Kakarott?"

"Yeah?"

"What the hell are our fusions doing?"

"I don't know. But I'll bet it's your Saiya-jin pride in them."

"WHAT? It's your stupidity!"

"I'm not stupid! Don't call me stupid!"

"You're also weak!"

"Hey, If I could get up, I'd kick your ass! I beat you every time we've fought!"

The two mightiest non-fused warriors in the DBZ world continued to bicker like old women. No matter what happened, that would never change.

It had been ten minutes already, and neither side chose signs of letting up. They both went as far as they could, then made themselves go farther.

It was really an awesome sight to behold. A pillar of light so large it put the Empire State building to shame. Two blasts, one white, one blue, combined in the middle to form a VERY bright light. The small mystery man had to summon a great deal of power to continue moving. At this rate, it should only be about twenty minutes. He grinned.

Ash was getting in trouble. He had little energy left, and was growing increasingly tired. At this rate, he'd have only one minute left. Ice wasn't doing much better. She, like her foe, was literally sweating blood. She almost lost it, but quickly regained it. Ash saw something to his right, and turned to see of all people, Chaozu!

"Ash! Quick! Billy Butt's friends are coming! If you don't team up with Ice, we're all doomed!" he said quickly. Ash thought. Something wasn't right. Chaozu's hat was missing. And how is it the weakest fighter above Roshi was able to stand, while Gogeta probably couldn't?

"Is something wrong, Ash? We have to team up with her, quick!" pleaded Chaozu

Ash ignored him and directed his attention back to Ice. It would only be a matter of mere seconds now….then the strongest would be known! He could imagine a timer getting to ten seconds. He blinked away some blood from his right eye, and focused again on Ice.

Nine.

Eight.

Seven.

Six.

Five.

Four.

Three.

Two.

BAM!

The blast exploded, one finally losing their grip. Ash was beaming! He won! He won! Then he looked up and saw the godly blast from Ice coming at him.

"SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!" he yelled, putting up his arms. He felt the blast against his skin as it screamed to peel away the layers, but he would not give in. He increased his power and yelled, thursting up his arms.

Then, without warning, Ash lost the blast and was bathed in the hottest fire, so hot it was cold.

Ice's eyes widened. SHE beat HIM? She brought down her weary arms, feeling something at the back of her head. A white light came out of her, and developed into Hail.

"Thanks, bro!"

Hail said nothing. He looked down and saw Ash screaming in the fiery light. He saw a dark figure throw about his limbs in obvious pain, and could even see the screaming.

"NO!" he yelled firing a healing blast to save Ash. The blast made it right above Ash before it was hit away like a baseball.

It was Chaozu, clutching a bonk stick.

"NANI?!?!?!?!?!" Ice and Hail yelled. Chaozu looked up, his white skin now very dark. On his forehead was a mark, but it was not a 'M'. Rather, it was a 'F'.

"'F'?" said Hail

Chaozu was now in front of him. He was just on the ground miles away, but was suddenly THERE. With a quick swing of the bonk stick, Hail was knocked off the planet. Ice, back to her stage 5 power, readied a battle stance.

"DIE CANCER PATIENT!" she yelled, throwing herself at the evil bonk stick using monster. Chaozu swung the stick, hitting her knee. She fell to her knees, crying in pain. Bringing the stick up in an upward movement, Chaozu took Ice out of the fight as well. Chaozu grinned. Then, his taller companion arrived.

He wore a long, dark black robe. The robe covered his legs and arms, as well as his face completely. On his chest was a fire icon, with a 'F' on it. You could not see his face, but you could see his evil glowing red eyes.

"Master." Said Chaozu, bowing.

"Indeed. This is a great day. Ash the Wanderer, Ice Queen, nahognos/Hail, all taken out. Their most powerful are gone and dead. This will be a great day! A day of conquest! A day of evil! THE DAY OF THE FLAMER! BWAHWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Ash suddenly opened his eyes. His whole body ached. He rubbed his head, feeling the large lump. He also noted that he was out of SSJ3. This alarmed him enough to summon enough strength to get up and hover away slowly. He was vaguely aware of a robed figure laughing above him. He growled, and attempted to heal himself via author powers. To his incredible shock, he couldn't.

"Nani?!?!? What is this? It must be that robed guy! He must have possessed Chaozu! DAMN HIM!" he yelled, throwing up his clenched fist in fury. He yelped in pain immediately.

"Owowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowothathurtowowowowowowowo" he said, flying away slowly.

Hail suddenly awoke, finding himself covered in snow. Quickly jumping up, he shivered. He immediately kicked and punched the air, attempting to warm himself.

"A cold Ice-jin? Never thought I'd see the day. But you're not an Ice-jin, are you?"

Hail turned around quickly. There was an old man, shivering in the cold. He had no hair, but a gentle enough appearance. His white eyebrows highlighted his blue eyes. At his side was a wooden cane, which seemed as old as him. Wrinkles covered his entire face. He wore a white robe, with a sign in the chest area, a drop of water. On the symbol was a 'T'.

"Who are you?" demanded Hail.

"Ah. He speaks. Come nahognos, allow me to explain everything in a warmer environment." Said the man.

"What? HEY! MY NAME IS HAIL!" he yelled, defiantly.

"Changing your form does not make you a new man." The old man walked into the blowing wind, out of sight.

"Huh? HEY! Come back here!" Hail said to no one. Shivering, he powered up an aura and followed. Not even the warming glow of the aura could keep the cold away.

JAT was busily healing her sister. She had suffered an extreme blow to her forehead and her legs. JAT had her eyes closed, with a light white healing aura around her. She opened her eyes, and looked right into the eyes of Chaozu.

"……Hihi?" JAT said weakly, rushing Ice's healing. Chaozu did not change his look. It was a look of evil intents. JAT tried to ignore him, hoping he would hold back. She was so close to healing her sister!

Chaozu opened his mouth slowly.

"I'm really tired of this cancer patient bullshit." He said. With a swift motion, he backhanded JAT into the ground.

"WHEN I'M THROUGH WITH YOU, YOU'LL BE THE HOSPITAL PATIENT!" he yelled, rushing towards JAT. He was suddenly stopped by Ice Queen. A very, very, very angry Ice Queen.

"NO ONES HURTS MY LITLE SISTER!!!!!!!" she screamed, delivering an extremly painful punch right in the jaw. Chaozu's whole body was thrown backward. He stopped himself after a couple hundred feet, clutching his face. Ice watched him attempt to re-locate his jaw, but he eventually let it go. It made a slight ripping sound as his lower jaw fell off his face.

"I'll bet that was painful." Said Ice, assuming a battle stance. Chaozu had already assumed full battle stance. He seemed to radiate defiance.

"Let me show you how you power up!" she screamed, throwing her all into gathering ki.

Ash eventually made it miraculouly to the authors. They had all recovered as best they could, and now seemed to be waiting. Ash fell in the middle of the group, throwing upa slight cloud of dust.

"I need someone to heal me! Now!" he yelled. No one moved.

"Huh? Galatea! Silver Galaxy? Chelsee? ANYONE?" he pleaded.

"Away, you plagarist!" someone yelled. The crowd moved aside to reveal nahognos.

"What the hell?"

"You heard me! Everyone knows you ripped off Consuming Madness!" 'nahognos' said.

"Hail? You changed back into nahognos? And what are you talking about? You know I wrote that!" Ash said.

"Don't lie, you son of a bitch! Bill wrote that story long ago! You ripped him off!"

"……What? You honestly believe Billy Butt 69 wrote Consuming Madness? Surely you jest!" Ash laughed. No on laughed with him. "……You actually think I ripped HIM off?"

"Not think, know!" Chelsee yelled. The group closed in on Ash. Ash looked around desperately, looking right at nahognos. A fire glistened in his eyes.

"It's you! YOU'RE THAT ROBE GUY CONTROLLING CHAOZU!" he yelled, jumping up before he remembered his battered body. He yelled in pain, while 'nahognos' approached him slowly.

"What makes you assume I'm the Flamer?" he asked. Ash's eyes widened.

"The what?"

"I'm not who you think I am. No." he said, moving closer. He then whispered in his ear, "That's really too bad for you. But the Flamer and I have the same foes. Unfortunately, he's too close to victory. Go. Go and kill him. No one will help you. If you fail, I'll take your soul for all eternity." Ash was suddenly thrown up, followed by a white blast. Instead of hurting him, the blast healed him completely, while simultaneously sending him flying. As he landed into yet more mountains, Ash suddenly disliked not having author powers.

"You are not an Ice-jin. You hide your true powers, why?" asked the old man. The two had made their way to a small hut. The small fire somehow filled the room with warmth, which pleased Hail greatly.

"I'm not hiding anything. And what the hell you mean I'm not an Ice-jin?" asked Hail, moving his white hair aside from his face.

"Exactly. Ice-jin don't have hair. You could be so much more powerful if you were to transform. Or have you? Hard to tell with hybrids."

"Will you speak some sense old man?"

"Fine. Do you know who I am?" the old man said, leaning on his cane.

"Some crazy old dude!" was the sharp answer.

"Incorrect. I am many things. I am respect, I am admiration, I am ability. You may call me the Talent."

"The talent?" said Hail, once again moving his hair aside. The old man smiled warmly.

"Yes. But do you know who your foe is?" said the Talent.

"Ash?"

"No."

"Chaozu?"

"No."

"Uh…Elmo?" he said, scratching his head.

"Definitely not."

"Al Gore?"

"He's everyone's foe."

"Britney Spears?"

"You are obviously joking. Or an idiot."

"Those damn little junk mail guys?"

"…….No…….."

"Hitler?"

"No."

"Hitler's clone?"

"No."

"Hitler's other clone?"

"Stop ripping off SomeRandomGuy."

"You?"

"Absolutely not."

"An author?"

"Close."

"Who?" The old man smiled once again.

"Shortly after your defeat, your main foe revealed himself. He is known as-"

"The Flamer!"

"Yes…so you know him?" said the old man

"Yes! No! I don't know! How can I?" said Hail, moving aside his hair once again. The man's smile turned into a grin.

"You are not a natural being. You believe you and your family are lab created. But your sister Ice Queen has crystal formations. So how can she be related to you?"

"She has hair!"

"Indeed. As does your sister JAT. But JAT does not have crystal formations either."

"We know we're a family! Little things like crystal formations don't matter!"

"What about your brother?"

Hail froze. (No pun intended)

"Brother?"

"Oh, that's right. You don't know yet. Don't look so confused, it's not THAT complicated. A total of 4 siblings. 2 female, 2 male. If you must know, his name is Zechs. Not that Gundam Zechs. He is a Saiya-jin."

"NOW I'm confused. I suddenly have a brother, a Saiya-jin brother no less, that I've never heard of, yet he's always been there?" demanded Hail.

"You came out of basically thin air. Why can't he?"

Hail was silent for a while.

"Where is he?"

"On Earth. He's the body the Flamer is using for power. His form has been changed, but should the Flamer decide to leave that body, your brother would return. But I doubt that will happen. It could be worse, you could know him."

Hail was wordless. He had a brother! A brother! Incredible! The thoughts of hapiness were soon replaced by extreme rage. Some THING possesed HIS brother!

"I'LL MAKE HIM PAY WITH HIS LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!" Hail screamed, developing a ki.

"Not with you being as weak as you are. Ash beat you to a standstill when he was at SSJ2. The Flamer would crush you." Replied the Talent, suddenly weezing and leaning heavily on his cane.

"You all right?!?" yelled Hail, helping him.

"*wheeze* I'm fine….*cough*……I need your help…." Said the Talent.

"What is it?"

"Someone…….masquerading as you……turned authors against Ash…..and deactivated his author powers………." The Talent sounded like he was dying. He coughed up some blood, but wiped it away.

"Since I'm the Talent…….if there is only hate…….I cannot thrive………You must help Ash win……..defeat the Flamer……."

"How? You said he was too strong!"

"Ever……ever watch that……episode of DragonBallZ where……where the Namek elder……he awakens hidden powers?"

"Yes! Can you unlock my powers? Said Hail, moving his hair away from his face once more.

"…….it will be hard……and I am so……I'm so…… *cough*" The Talent coughed more blood and pressed all his weight on his cane. Hail quickly moved a chair to him. The Talent sat down slowly, then continued.

"So weak……..give me your hand……and kick some Flamer ass……"

Ice Queen kicked downwards to Chaozu, then punched rapidly. Chaozu threw the blows aside and punched her in the gut. Despite him not having his lower jaw, he seemed to smile evily. Ice Queen punched Chaozu suddenly with an uppercut, cringing at the squishing sound of her fist meeting Chaozu's face. Chaozu flipped over, but landed on his feet only a few feet away, as he flew at her rapidly. Plowing through her, he continued to JAT and grabbed her. The second his hand met her, an evil red glow appeared. Tiny white balls of energy flowed from JAT to Chaozu, healing his jaw. When it was healed, he smiled.

"Your usefulness has come to an end." Chaozu suddenly threw her in the air, followed by a blast. Ice Queen arrived right there as she saw JAT get blown apart. With a swift motion, Chaozu was able to decapitate Ice Queen with a ki blade. As her head rolled to the ground, Chaozu laughed and stepped on it casually.

"Bitch."

Hail suddenly lurched forward.

"AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIS!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Hail screamed, throwing his arms aside. He was totally unaware of a huge aura that had developed around him, blowing everything away. The Talent was the only thing not in motion. Hail was screaming, powering up to a level never before known by him. His pupils went to an errie white. His skin grew completely black, shining. Dark navy blue crystal formations appeared, growing and pointing out into wicked blades. His hair straightened out more, becoming rigid. His hair now spiked up in every direction, starting up at his forehead. It reached halfway down his back, glowing white.

"Impressive……….." the Talent said weakly. Super Hail looked at him.

"I GOTTA AVENGE SIS!" he screamed, lighting racing across his body.

"Don't…worry…they're…alive…*cough*…that…wasn't…real……." Hail calmed down, staying at his current state of power.

"In-fucking-credible! I feel GREAT!" he said, testing himself by kicking and punching. He turned his gaze towards the Talent.

"But if you pull that shit any more, you won't have to worry about the Flamer, you'll have me to deal with."

"Fine……go…..go and……….fight……." said the Talent, falling unconscious. Hail was startled, but realized he was only unconscious. Hail then stepped outside, summoning his strength once more. Firing up a godly ki, he blasted off the nameless planet and approached Earth.

Chaozu stared at Ice Queen. She was at her full power, her stage 5 transfomation. As she breathed, visible air escaped her lips. Her power was so great, it was …….cold?

"TIME TO DIE YOU LITLE BITCH!!!!!!!!!" She rocketed towards Chaozu, slamming her punch into his stomach. With her current strenght, her incredible momentum, and her body weight, Chaozu's body was simply a wet paper bag for her to pop. She sailed past him, smiling. Chaozu stood still, blinking. He looked down slowly in disbelief as his organs fell slowly out of his body. His eyes rolled to the back of his head as he fell into the ground. JAT looked at him and promptly vomited. Ice Queen wiped the blood off herself, then walked to him. She rummaged around, eventually finding her prize: the bonk stick.

"Ha! No one is gonna mess with me now!"

"I beg to differ." Said the Flamer, arriving slowly and dramatically. His robe fluttered and moved as the wind blew past. His eyes glowed a bright red in the darkness of his face. He seemed to be….smiling. Smiling like he knew his opponent stood no chance, and that he would surely best her without any effort.

Ash sailed through the sky, searching. He detected 3 major kis. Two to where he assumed Ice was. One was her, the other had to be the Flamer. The third was in space, approaching rapidly. He guessed he'd arrive in 15-20 minutes.

"No! Ice hasn't a prayer against him! I have to stop him!" he said, powering into SSJ.

And then, without any warning, Ash found five figures blocking his way. Goku, Gogeta, Veggeto, Agony, and Majin Buu.

"What?" said Ash, dodging a punch from Veggeto. "What the hell is this?" He was being surronded on all sides.

"Less talk, more killing. Let's dance." Said Gogeta. The ballot began.

Veggeto threw apart his arms, gathering energy. His hair glowed bright yellow, eventually breaking through SSJ and into SSJ2. Gogeta growled as he approached SSJ4 slowly, hair sprouting on his body. Agony grinned as her hands grew into large claws, her body crackling with black lighning. Majin Buu grunted and fired up an aura worthy of Goku. Speaking of Goku, he was already in SSJ3. All five warriors had a 'F' on their foreheads.

"Steele, it is pointless to resist." said Agony

"Steele? I'm Ash!"

"We are far your superiors." Said Veggeto

"Don't let Steele know that, he'd be pissed!"

"In every single way imaginable." Said Buu

"Only in the sanity level. That boy's nuttier than chinese chicken salad."

"We also outnumber you five to one." Said Gogeta.

"You must be looking for Steele. Oh well, you got me instead."

"Surrender, or die. You have no allies." Said Goku. Ash growled and fired up an aura, going SSJ3.

"Bring it!" he yelled. He jumped forward, tackling Goku. Throwing punch after punch, he hammered into Goku. Goku growled and jumped back several times, then disappearing. Appearing behind Ash, he flipped into a kick which sent Ash flying. He waved his arms around, white light radiating from the cracks in his fists. He then began tossing blast after blast, drilling into Ash. Ash threw up his arms and made a ki shield, but was being driven back.

"Shit! This possession shit really ups the power!" he yelled.

And then there was silence.

All 5 warriors were on the ground, cringing in pain. Ash looked around, bewildered. He had to avert his gaze from the sky. A man, bathed in pure white light, slowly lowered himself to Ash's level.

"St…..St……STEELE? STEELE!" Ash yelled. Mike Steele smiled.

"I think they're looking for me." He said. He immediately looked at Veggeto, Agony, Goku, and Buu.

"Those four are mine. Try to handle Gogeta. Oh, by the way. Good luck, Eric." Said Steele, lifting his glowing hands at the four warriors. A light emaciated from his arms, throwing the 4 back. Steele grinned and flew forward, keeping them at bay. Meanwhile, Gogeta prepared to engage Ash.

To understand the evil the authors were battling, you must understand the Flamer. The Flamer is not an individual, nor the author on FF.Net with the same moniker. Rather, he is an entity. He is the hate, the jealousy, the anger, the evil radiated from the flamers. Eventually the evil was so strong it became a shapeless entity. It found Zechs, the Ice-jin brother, and took his body to acquire a form. He mutated it to his needs, and went about destroying Ash. Most of the anger and evil being directed at Ash, the Flamer had great instincts to destroy the fanfic writer. Just as the Flamer was created from evil, the Talent was made from good. If one grows strong, the other weakens. If the hate or the friendship becomes scarce, one weakens. If the Flamer succeeds in his quest to become absolute, the Talent will die and wither away. The result would be wars everywhere across the universe, and hate in the hearts of every being in existence. To be allied with the Flamer is to sell your soul to the devil. To stand against him is certain death.

Well, maybe not. But flaming in itself is evil, and as the pure manifestation of such evil, the Flamer is immensely dangerous to all fanfiction. The only ones that dared to oppose the evil are Ash the Wanderer, Ice Queen, her brother Hail and sister JAT, and Mike Steele. The Flamer recognized this, and will do anything to stop them. But the unknown factor, the nahognos impersonator, might just change the scales slighly. He might stop a splash against the ocean of wrath that was the Flamer's rage.

The Flamer closed his eyes and looked down, grinning.

"You know, this is going to be rather fun. Now I can destroy not only your brother, but your entire weak family." Ice was dumbfounded.

"IF YOU LAY ONE HAND ON HAIL…"

"Silence, woman! I was not talking about the weak one known as nahognos! I was talking about the true powerhouse of your family, the Saiya-jin!"

"The…Saiya-jin?"

"Ha! You don't even know about your Saiya-jin brother!" the Flamer taunted.

Then the Flamer removed his hood. A Saiya-jin face stared back at Ice. The Saiya-jin had black hair, which spiked downwards. His eyes glowed red, and the glow left a line wherever he moved his head. The Saiya-jin laughed evily.

"Look Ice Queen! It is your brother! Or what's left of him, anyway!" he laughed.

"You…you…BASTARD!" she screamed, rocketing forward. The Flamer barely flinched as she slammed her body into him, in a way similar to when she defeated Chaozu. Her body sagged and fell immediately.

"Oh, did the little Ice Queen hurt herself? Aww…poor BITCH!" He yelled, grabbing her roughly. He then slammed his fist into her face over and over, laughing. Soon his limbs became a blur and Ice Queen wasn't sure of which way to fall.

The four warriors were being pummeled by a laughing Steele.

"Come on! You can do better!" said Steele, dodging every blow with no effort.

"Heeeeeyyyyyyyyy…IDEA!" smiled Steele.

"Huh?" said Goku. The four warriors suddenly found themselves behind a pedastal, lined up in row. They were in a cheply done trivia game show room, with Steele as the host. Steele himself changed into a cheap suit and wore a plastic smile.

"Hellllllllllllllo lady and gentlemen! This is…DBZ OR DIE!" The audience began to laugh. Agony poked her pedastal. Goku just looked confused.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" yelled Veggeto

"This is DBZ OR DIE! Get a question right, and you're one step closer to the final round! Get one wrong, and BAM! Major ouchies for all to share! The first section is DUB TO SUB. Translate the image of something to their true Japanese counterpart. QUESTION ONE!"

The four scratched their heads as a lady walked out with a tray of french fries.

"The hell is this?" said Veggeto. Immediately a large anvil dropped on his head. Veggeto's body was squashed into the ground (think Bugs Bunny) and got up slowly, cursing. Sticking his finger in his mouth, he began to blow. Soon he re-inflated himself.

"Uh…Freeza?" said Goku. Steele was stunned.

"Uh…yes…yes…you're right? Goku is right?!?" said Steele. Soon another woman walked out, carrying some salt and pepper shakers.

"SOLT AND PEPPOR! GOTTA BE THEM!" yelled Buu.

"NOPE! That's Chrono Cross! WRONG!" A spear flew from no where and stuck itself in Buu's forehead. Buu complained loudly and attempted to take it out, but met with no success.

"Oh, for heaven's sake…." Said Agony, slicing off the spear neatly. Buu's skin wrapped over and absorbed the spear remnants.

"Garlic Jr.'s gang?" said Goku. Steele's jaw dropped again.

"…Yes……..NEXT!" he impatiently yelled. Yet another woman walked out. She was transporting a copy of the Disney movie Hercules.

"That guy from that Hercules TV Show?" guessed Agony. Immmediately a battle axe dropped on her and split her in half. As Buu laughed, she pushed off the axe and regenerated.

"Son of a bitch! Why didn't I like that!?!" she yelled. A dart lodged itself in her buttocks and she yelled again.

"I turned off your pain powers. It was only fair."

"AHHHH!!!!!! GOD DAMNIT!" Another dart found its way to her right thigh.

"Don't curse, Agony." Said Steele calmly.

"FUCK THAT! OWWW!!!!!!! GOD DAMNIT!! OWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!! MOTHER FUCKING OWW!!!!! PIECE OF HORSE SHIT! OOOOWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!" Darts were freely soaring into's Agony body.

"Each dart can knock out 20 elephants. She'll do herself in soon enough." Smiled Steele. Sure enough, after only a few hours of cursing and screaming, Agony was asleep on the floor. Well, sort of. There were so many drugged darts in her, nothing could touch her skin. Steele and the others had long fallen asleep, and they all woke up to the odd sudden silence.

"Zzzzz…what? Huh? She's asleep? Wow…let's continue with the game. The second part is KNOW YOUR RACES. What is this person a member of?" Suddenly, an image of Piccolo appeared.

"A weakling!" yelled Buu. Buu then attempted to remove the rather sizable dagger placed in his neck.

"A Namek-jin." Said Goku. Steele smiled, then showed an image of Kaioubit.

"A Kaioshin!" yelled Buu. Buu then set to work removing the broken broom stick from his anal section of his anatomy.

"That would be a fusion." Replied Goku. Steele frowned, then showed his last slide. It was of Zarbon.

"…I don't know what the HELL that is." Said Buu, dodging a dart. Buu was placed under a rocket engine in seconds, burning him into ashes.

"That is a member of the species known as the Tarlos."Goku replied. Everyone's jaws dropped.

"I didn't even know that!" said Steele.

"Hell, even I didn't know that!" said Zarbon. Zarbon was quickly drugged for cursing.

"Uh…right…final round……Veggeto and Goku……….this is a sudden death round….." said Steele with great uncertaintly.

"GET ON WITH IT YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH!" yelled Veggeto. With a gaze, Steele brought Veggeto out of existance.

"That's why it's called sudden death. Anyway, Goku wins!" said Steele

"YAY! WHAT'D I WIN" celebrated Goku, jumping up and down. Steele removed his body that allowed him physical form, revealing his true self to Goku. Goku was blown away and blinded by the sight. Steele grew back into his body smiling.

"You win the chance to see my true form." He grinned

"Well, we're all outta time, so, uh, lets get on with THE QUEEN VS THE WANDERER!

Gogeta crossed his arms, smirking.

"Let's see, a SSJ4 vs. a SSJ3. Gee, I wonder who'll win?" commented Gogeta.

"Me." Said Ash, suddenly powering up. Soon, he was at SSJ3.

"LET'S RUMBLE!" yelled Gogeta, leaping forward. He brought his arm out to punch, but Ash dodged it with minimal effort. Swinging his foot up, Ash landed three quick punches on Gogeta. Gogeta was knocked back, but managed to fire away two shots at the Wanderer. Ash dodged one, but was hit by the second. Temporarily stunned, Gogeta was able to place Ash in a head grip.

"HA! Gotcha! Pretty strong for a SSJ3!" remarked Gogeta.

"I……am not finished!" Ash yelled, powering up even more. His pupils faded, and his aura grew darker gold.

"Nani?" yelled Gogeta, losing his grip.

"Meet Super Saiya-jin Ash The Wanderer. Version 3.2." he smiled. Suddenly yelling, he landed 4 good hits on Gogeta's chest, knocking him backwards. Grabbing his body with both hands, Ash lunged forward and swung around, tossing Gogeta in the process. As Gogeta's body was sent soaring, Ash lifted his right arm and concentrated. Energy crackled around him as a holgraphic image developed in front of him, developing into a crosshair. Ash smiled and yelled, pumping all the energy possible into his arms. His sweat sizzeled away as lightning danced on his body. Using some of his power, Ash fired the crosshair at Gogeta. Gogeta was aware enough to know only that he was flying and that there was a ki crosshair image stuck on his butt.

"PERVERT!" yelled Gogeta, still flying. Ash grinned and held up an energy ball twice the size of a basketball in his hand.

"READY!" he yelled, cocking his arm back.

"AIM!" he yelled, finishing up his energy ball.

"FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed, throwing the ball with all his might. It broke the sound barrier as it soared to Gogeta, by Gogeta, and past Gogeta. Both Ash and Gogeta smiled as Gogeta put on the brakes in the air.

"Missed. KAMEHAMEHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed SSJ4 Gogeta, firing the blast at Ash. Ash responded with his own Kamehameha, neutralizing Gogeta's blast. Gogeta struggled, then pushed forward, shoving his blast to the halfway to Ash mark. He pushed again and quickly halved the distance again.

"DIE FOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" yelled Gogeta, moving the blast within inches of Ash's face.

"YOU FIRST!!!!!!!!" yelled back Ash, as the ball he threw earlier came back around and promptly inserted itself up Gogeta's butt. Gogeta shuddered, as Ash's blast easily overthrew his and hit Gogeta head on. Gogeta screamed, however high pitched, in the blast's wake. As soon as Ash ceased the blast, Gogeta fell. His body was charred and burnt, but he got up. Ash looked on in disbelief.

"Not…….enough…….to……..kill…….me…….." wheezed Gogeta. Ash smirked.

"AND EXPLODE!!!!!!!!!!!!" he yelled, closing his open hand into a fist. Gogeta's eyes went wide as the blast still up his rectum exploded, taking most of his lower back with it. Gogeta turned around, saw a very large hole on his butt (again, no pun intended) and fell over unconscious.

"Yech! As effective as that was, the Ready Aim Fire and Explode Ball was too sick. I'm never using that again! YECH!" said Ash, flying to the Flamer and the Ice Queen.

The Flamer had finally grown bored, and with a contempuous sound, tossed Ice's badly wounded body away.

"I grow tired of this. I wish I didn't kill that fool Ash so quickly. I wonder if those five killed Steele yet."

"You thought I died? Hello. WAKE UP CALL!" said Ash, landing gracefully.

"Don't forget me!" said a smiling Steele, landing to Ash's right.

"I want some action too." Said Hail, landing to Ash's left. He looked over and saw his two wounded sisters.

"Pss! Looking good Hail!" smiled Ash

"And you as well. Now, to deal with the asshole! YOU'RE MINE!" screamed Hail, jumping forward, slashing at the Flamer's face. The Flamer dodged Hail's blows like he was in slow motion. Hail cursed and increased his power even more, unloading everything he had on him. The Flamer seemed to grin, and used only one arm to dodge.

Then Ash jumped in, and the Flamer found himself dealing with a Super Ice-jin from Hell and a SSJ3. Steele didn't move.

"HELP US STEELE!" yelled Ash, still punching and kicking as fast as he could.

"………"

"HEY, YOU ASSHOLE! HELP!" screamed Hail, still punching air.

"………"

"You know what to do, Steele. Don't you?" said the Flamer cooly.

"Yes…Yes I do………………………my master." Said Steele. Ash and Hail stopped moving.

"…Your master?" breathed Ash. Steele did not move.

"Oh. Fuck. And. Me." Said Hail. The Flamer grinned with the Saiya-jin face that was not his.

"Yesssss…Steele obeys me. I was so busy enslaving him, I was almost hitable by you two idiots. Almost." He said, smiling.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" yelled Hail, grabbing the Flamer by his neck.

"YOU ASSHOLE!" he yelled, headbutting him.The constant impact caused Hail's own forehead to split open, but Hail continued headbutting him. But eventually Hail ran out of energy and rage and eased his grip. Then and fell over, his own blood covering his face.

"Is it just me or did he just beat himself up?" mocked the Flamer.

"God damnit, I gotta pick better allies…" Said Ash muttered.

"Well…uh…shit…I was gonna make you watch him die or something…but…uh...um…well, shit. I guess we skip ahead to me and you fighting." Said the Flamer, scratching his head.

"Uh…right! YOU'LL NEVER WIN!" yelled Ash.

"YOU ARE PUNY COMPARED TO MY POWER!" The Flamer yelled back.

"YOU CAN NEVER DEFEAT ME!" countered Ash.

"YOU ARE NOT WORTH MY TIME!" The Flamer yelled back.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" yelled Ash.

"AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!" screamed the Flamer.

"IS IT JUST ME, OR IS THE CAPS LOCK STUCK ON?" screamed Ash.

"PROBABLY. HEY ASH OR NAHOGNOS, WHOEVER'S WRITING THIS PART! TURN OFF THE CAPS LOCK! HEY!" yelled the Flamer

"HEY! HEY! YEAH, YOU! WE'RE TALKING TO YOU! TURN OFF THE CAPS LOCK! Hey! Hey, what do you know? That's better. Thanks!" smiled Ash.

"Where were we?"

"Uh…we were using incredibly cheesy lines to taunt each other."

"What type of cheesy lines?"

"Uh…you can never defeat me, your power in insignifigant compared to mine, blah blah blah."

"Right! Um…Let's just fight, this is confusing!"

"But we can waste so much more space!"

"I think the fans just wanna see us fight."

"Really? Both of them?"

"Not funny."

"Sorry. I'm supposed to be saying stuff like that" said the Flamer.

"So jump at me and try to punch me."

"Been done so many times already in this fic."

"Huh?"

"Geez man, it's been done every fight. Think of something new, like firing a blast and appearing behind them."

"Think that's be a good idea?" asked Ash

"Yeah." Said the Flamer. With a swift motion, Ash chucked a ki blast at his foe's face, then jumped behind him. As he jumped, he twirled his body around to slam into him from behind. Firing two blasts at the ground and flying as fast as he could, Ash disappeared into space. The Flamer thudded into the ground, burying himself in dust. Ash smiled and thrust out his arms, his eyes glowing an eerie white. Rock hands appeared out of the ground and one grabbed the Flamer, the other getting a large rock body out of the ground. Ash smiled and flew into the rock creature's mouth. Sitting in a seat, Ash grabbed the controls.

"DRAGONDUM ASHROCK! GO!" he yelled as cheesily as he could, slamming his fist into the now tiny Flamer. Ash grinned.

"This rock monster was inspired by the Gundam!"

"Yeah, too bad it's made outta rock and not metal!" yelled the Flamer, building a fireball above his head. The middle of the fireball suddenly snaked out and slammed into Ash's rock whatchamacallit, burning it. Ash yelled and started hitting buttons, but was suddenly aware the Flamer melted most of his rock monster.

"Well, uh, damn! Not many fires can eat THROUGH ROCK!" yelled Ash, hitting the big red button.

"SECRET WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION THAT LEAVES A BOO-BOO THAT WILL NEED A BAND-AID!" he yelled, as the rock monster picked up its own head and threw it at the Flamer. The Flamer blasted it to smittereens before it hit, and Ash's jaw dropped.

"Uh………….well, I guess this was a huge waste of time and effort." said Ash. Jumping out of his thingamabob, Ash slammed his fist into the Flamer's face. Swinging his foot around, Ash crushed the Flamer's legs with a swift blow. Powering up a kiezan, Ash threw it at the Flamer with a heart full of rage.

A lone man was scribbling in a dark, lonely dungeon. He looked up and shielded his eyes from the sudden light of the door opening.

"H…Hello? Eric? Did you bring food or water? I'm so hungry, let me go! Please!" the desperate man named Ian "nahognos/Hail" Wilson.

"Ian! That last part was terrible! You can't kill the Flamer that easily! And the rock thing was stupid. Dragondum Ashrock? The Gundamn fans are gonna have my ass! I don't even watch Gundam Wing! You're desecrating my fic!" Eric "Ash the Wanderer" Mersereau said.

"I'm so sorry sir! Please! I've written the entire thing and you just beat and whip me and take the credit! Please, let me go! Let me see my family!" he pleaded

"What makes you so confident your family still exists?" smiled Eric evilly.

"…No! NONONONONONONONO!!!!!!!!!!!!!" wept Ian.

"Write more, and make it funny! The team of slaves working on Atrocities already have 2 chapters out! What's taking you so long?"

"I'm so very sorry sir! I'm only one man! Please, just let me go! I can't write this whole thing myself!"

"Then you shouldn't have written yourself in!" barked Ash.

"I'm sorry! Sir, if you don't mind a weak pitiful maggot such as I asking, why don't you just have whoever wrote the other chapters of the Ice Games write this?" asked Ian humbly

"They have alrady been killed. You see, they had a tendency to be unfunny." Smiled Eric.

"I'm sorry sir! I'll resume writing funny witty material right away!" said Ian, scribbling like mad.

"Excelent. And don't let me catch you eating any more rats, you weakling!" said Eric, slamming the door.

The Flamer looked down and saw a giant gash in his side. Ash landed next to him and smirked evily. The Flamer's mouth was still wide open, gazing at the stump that was once his right side of his body.

"Not feeling all there today, Flame-Boy?" smiled Ash.

"Not really, I just need to pull myself together!" the Flamer suddenly yelled, as red energy covered his body. His side was magically healed back together, the Flamer without a scratch. The Flamer crossed his arms and grinned at Ash. Ash greeted him back with an even bigger grin.

"Go time." Ash breathed, the Flamer jumping forward. Blocking the blows as fast as they came, Ash smiled.

"HAPPY LEARNED HOW TO PUTT! UH-OH!" he yelled, head-butting the Flamer and knocking him back.

Little Billy sat at his room, absorbing the stories by this Ash guy.

"Hey, that madness story was pretty cool! Hey, what's this thing?" he said clicking the mouse on the song fic Stronger (Than Kakarot). Immediately terror and horror filled his features.

"I thought Ash was cool, but this SUCKS! AHHH!!!!! MY EARS!!!! THEY'RE BLEEDING!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed, clutching his face and falling over in pain.

"Billy?" said his mother downstairs, instinctly jumping up.

"BILLY!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" she screamed, finding his covered in his own blood and feces.

"YOU BASTARD FANFIC WRITER! I'M GOING TO FOUND THE MAAW! MOTHERS AGAINST ASH THE WANDERER!"

Suddenly Ash lost the feeling in his right arm and the Flamer promptly planted his fist in his side.

"AHHHH!!!!" Ash screamed, weakly trying to punch the Flamer.

"You see now fool? I grow stronger with every Ash-hater! BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"

"HA! SOMEONE JUST READ CONSUMING MADNESS! IN YOUR FACE!" screamed Ash, rapidly punching the Flamer's face.

"Someone joined MAAW!" replied the Flamer, roundhousing Ash to the floor.

"Review for Atrocites!" yelled Ash, lifting the Flamer's right leg and slamming his foot in his crotch.

In a room full of mothers with Anti-Ash signs, Billy's mother walks up to the podium, clears her throat, breathes, and talks.

"Test? Test? This thing on? TEST!" she yelled, making everyone in the room jump.

"Ok, it works. Allright, this meeting is called to order. Any old business?" A woman in a blue dress stood up.

"Ash sucks!" she yelled, sparking conversations throughtout the room.

"ORDER! ORDER! ORDER ORDER ORDER!" screamed Billy's mom. Silence resumed abruptly.

"Better. Any new business?" she said, a woman in a red dress standing up.

"Ash sucks!" she yelled, inspiring even more mayhem, death, and destruction. Billy's mother started to bang her gavel, but soon sighed and sat down. A man with red hair slowly walked to the pedestal.

"Friends, friends, friends…..let us not bicker. I have here in my hands a list of known authors on this…. "Fanfiction.net". I believe you all want to read the list, but allow me to read the important ones for you. Ahem. First off, Eric M. Otherwise known as…Ash the Wanderer. We also have the identiity of every single peson who appeared in the Ice Games, as well as over half those who reviewed. Ian Wilson, this nahongnos/Hail person, is no where to be seen…but my friends! I have here the location of the true foe! Xing Li! It is he who gathered and collected the abominations! Destroy him, and ff.net will fall apart. My friends, it is the only logical path." He said soothingly, mesmerizing the crowd.

"………YEAH! YOU CAN DO IT! CUT HIS FUCKING HEAD OFF!" yelled some hick.

The man with red hair smiled evily, a red glow twinkling in his eyes.

Ash lunged forward and grabbed the Flamer's hood, taking it off.

"HA! TIME TO MEET YOUR MAKER- Steele?" Ash said, dumbfounded.

"DIE!" screamed Steele, dressed as the Flamer. Ash brought one hand to his chin and he dodged Steele's blows with one arm.

"Hmm…I couldn't have been fighting the Flamer for that long…I'd bet Steele just took over the battle… Then where-AH!" yelled Ash, growing weak. Steele smiled and brought his fist up and powered up ki.

"DIE!" he screamed, bringing down his arm. It was grabbed by a very serious looking Hail.

"No." he said simply, twisting Steele's arm around. As Steele yelled out of pain, Hail slammed his fist into his stomach. Steele wheezed and fell over.

"You ok, Ash?" said Hail.

"Uh…no…no energy…"

"That's what I thought." Said Hail, grabbing his head. Hail's eyes glowed red, and a fiery wave spread over him, revealing himself as the Flamer.

"Now…we finish this…" said the Flamer.

"My ass we will!" screamed the real Hail, slamming into the Flamer. The Flamer grinned.

"My my my…stronger, are we? Yessss…the Saiya-jin blood in you saw to that…but it won't be enough. Time to end this!" screamed the Flamer. Hail looked at him with fury.

"YYYYYYAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed, head-butting the Flamer. The Flamer's head threw back, blood flying. Hail quickly landed punch after punch on him, growling.

"It seems Hail is pissed. But you can not be serious." Smiled the Flamer.

"I've never been more serious!" he screamed, wrapping his arms around him. The Flamer's eyes opened in surprise as Hail began to crush his bones in his grip. The Flamer's mouth opened, but no sounds came out. Meanwhile, Ash had rolled to his back and looked up.

"No…NO! DON'T!" he screamed. Hail and the Flamer ignored him as the Flamer threw open his arms, breaking his grip. Hail was in shock as the Flamer quickly punched through his stomach. The punch drew him close, almost embracing him as a brother.

"Time to die, freak." Whispered the Flamer in Hail's ear. Hail's open mouth filled with blood as he flinched. Drawing out his arm, the Flamer put a hand on both shoulders. Smiling evily, the Flamer fired up an aura that began to burn Hail. Hail screamed, begging for mercy.

"HAIL!" Ash screamed, flying towards them. Hail screamed a long agonizing scream as the fire engulfed him and burned the flesh from his bones. To finish it off, the Flamer grabbed him by his neck and twisted, breaking his neck and turning his head backward.The Flamer smiled as he let down his aura.

"Stay away from the Flamer if you can't take the heat." He smiled.

Ash's jaw dropped and stayed there, not moving. Clutching his fist, he began to utter a low growl.

"Oh? What's this? You want to die as well?" smiled the Flamer. Ash's pupils went out as he once again surpassed SSJ3.

"THAT.IS. IT. I'LL MAKE YOU SUFFER!" he roared, flying at him, fist outward. The Flamer grinned, but abruptly stopped as the punch pierced his chest as easily as he had pierced Hail's.

"You like it? HUH? YOU LIKE IT YOU SON OF A BITCH!" screamed Ash, blasting the Flamer away. The Flamer skidded through some rocks and stopped, looking up at Ash. Ash stared him down, then proceeeded to punch his chest as fast as was possible, with no mercy. The Flamer gasped , then we punched into the ground. The Flamer thrust around his arms, hoping to hit something. Ash grabbed one arm and viciously ripped it off. He then tossed the Flamer into the air and flew up above him to smash him onto the ground. The Flamer landed on his head with a loud thud, but he recovered quickly and leapt up again.

Until Ash fired a blast which quickly and effectively removed his legs. The Flamer seemed to float in the air temporarily, a moment frozen in time.

Then there was a splurching sound as he landed.

"Holy crap!" he yelled, trying to pick himself up with his remaining arm while re-growing his body. But Ash flew down and kicked him to the ground. The Flamer's eyes closed, and he was vaguely aware of Ash's fist about to come on him.

"I challenge you to a karioke match!" he suddenly yelled. Ash froze.

"What did you say?" he said, fist still clutched.

"I said I challenge you to a karioke match! Whoever gets more votes wins! Agreed?"

Ash blinked and thought it over.

"…I could kill you now. But I think I'll humiliate you first. Agreed." The Flamer smiled and snapped his fingers, making a stage appear. Standing up on newly-grown legs, he walked to the stage. Smiling and snapping his fingers, an audience appeared. The Flamer then violently shifted his head around, finally arriving at the face of Mark from Blink-182.

"Since I'm going to die at the cruel hands of this villian Ash, I chose Adam's Song. Hit it." He said, drums and the guitar playing. He smiled evily and began to sing.

"I never thought, I'd die alone,

I laughed the loudest, who had known?

I traced the cord back from the wall,

No wonder, it was never plugged in at all.

I took my time, I hurried up,

The choice was mine, I didn't think enough

I'm too depressed, to go on,

You'll be sorry when I'm gone.

I never conquered and it came

16 just held such better days,

days when I, still felt alive,

I couldn't wait till I got outside

The world, its way to late to try

The tour was over, we survived

I couldn't wait, till I got home,

To pass the time in my room alone.

I never thought, I'd die alone

Another six months, I'll be unknown

Give all my things, to all my friends

You'll never step foot in my room again

You'll close it up, board it up

Remember the time that I spilt the cup

Of applejuice, in the hall

Please tell mom this is not her fault

I never conquered and it came

16 just held such better days,

days when I, still felt alive,

I couldn't wait till I got outside

The world, its way to late to try

The tour was over, we survived

I couldn't wait, till I got home,

To pass the time in my room alone.

I never conquered and it came

16 just held such better days,

days when I, could still feel alive,

I couldn't wait till I got outside

The world, its way to late to try

The tour was over, we survived

I couldn't wait, till I got home,

To pass the time in my room alone."

The audience went absolutely crazy, screaming for the Flamer. As the Flamer walked backstage, he passed by Ash.

"You're fucked now, boy. I laid some Blink on them, not to mention some brainwashing."

Ash was silent. Then he cocked his head.

"No matter what you do flamer, I'll always keep on rollin'."Ash quiped.

And then he walked onstage with his band. It was comprised of Brolly on drums, 17 at the turntable, Freeza on the 7-sting, Buu on the bass, and himself at the vocals.

"Ready? Fire it up, Freeza. Let's do it for Hail."

Freeza nodded, then strummed away at the guitar with powerful tunes. Brolly began beating the drums while 17 hit the record. Ash breathed in and said,

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN…" while 17 repeated "Put your hands up" on the record.

"ASH THE WANDERER…GONNA KEEP ON ROLLIN BABY!" he said, screaming as the stage lit up, the band members playing away, the crowd going crazy.

"BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

KEEP ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

OKAY!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

COME ON!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

YEAH!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN"

"NOW I KNOW YA'LL BE LOVING THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE!

A.S.H. Wanderer is right here!

People in the house put them hands in the air!

CAUSE IF YOU DON'T CARE, THEN WE DON'T CARE!

One Two Three times Two to the Six!

Going for a fix, with the Wanderer fics!

So where the fuck you at punk?

SHUT THE FUCK UP!

AND BACK THE FUCK UP!

WHILE WE FUCK THIS TRACK UP!"

"BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

KEEP ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

OKAY!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

COME ON!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

YEAH!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!"

Ash began jumping up and down with an energy unseen before. Gearing up for the next lines, Ash pointed at the Flamer and he was suddenly yanked on stage.

"You wanna mess with the Wanderer?" screamed Ash.

"Yeah?" said the Flamer.

"You can't mess with the Wanderer!"

"Why?"

"Cause I get big hit fics!"

"When?"

"Everyday, and everynight!"

"D'oh!"

"And this 1000 reviews thing right here?!"

"Yeah?"

"Well, I'm doing it all the time!"

"Huh?"

"So you better make some better fics, and uh, get with the times!"

"Doh!"

"I got the game set, so don't complain yet!

24/7 Never beggin for a rain check!

OLD SCHOOL WRITERS PASSING OUT THAT HOT SHIT!

THAT ROCK SHIT!

AND DANCE IN THE MOSH PIT!"

"BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

KEEP ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

OKAY!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

COME ON!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

YEAH!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

Hey ladies! Hey Fellas!

AND THE PEOPLE, THAT DON'T GIVE A FUCK!

All the lovers! And all the haters!

AND THE PEOPLE, THAT CALL THEMSELVES PLAYAS!

Hot mamas, pimp daddys!

And the people, rollin in their caddy's

Hey rockers! Hip-hoppers!

AND EVERYBODY ALL AROUND THE WORLDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!

BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

KEEP ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

OKAY!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

COME ON!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

YEAH!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

BREATHE IN, NOW BREATHE OUT!

HANDS UP, NOW HANDS DOWN!

BACK UP, BACK UP!

TELL ME WHAT YOU WANNA DO NOW!

KEEP ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

OKAY!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

COME ON!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!

YEAH!

ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN ROLLIN!"

Ash finished, ending with a flying jump. The crowd instantly went absolutely crazy, tearing apart everything in sight. The Flamer's jaw dropped.

"The Hell? I made them! And I made them to hate you! And just for kicks I brainwashed them! HOW COME THEY LOVE YOU?" he shouted. Ash just smiled and walked past him.

"Because I can write."

The Flamer growled and powered up, firing a blast at Ash's back. Ash leapt to the side, barely dodging the blast.

Ash powered up an aura so great the fires threw everything around them away like nothing. Ash looked at his foe with the greatest look of deadly seriousness he'd worn yet.

"Let's cut to the chase, shall we?" smiled the Flamer.

"Gladly." Said Ash, throwing an energy ball at the Flamer. It was easily knocked away.

"Don't insult me. I mean your best." Said the Flamer, slowly hovering in the air, hundreds of feet away.

"Fine." Said Ash, the aura concentrating in his palms. The Flamer grinned and fired up his hellish aura in his hands. Soon, both blasts were ready.

"ANCIENT DEAD BEAM!" Ash screamed, being knocked slightly back while the grey blast flew. The Flamer grinned, firing his.

"TOUCH OF BURNING HELL ATTACK!" he screamed letting loose a red, blood colored beam. The blasts slammed into one another roughly, spreading out like a pancake. Neither fighter could keep his ground for long, and were knocked back. Ash grinned, then screamed above the roar of the beam.

"HEY ASSHOLE! KNOW WHY THEY CALL ME ASH? WELL, LET ME SHOW YOU!" he screamed, as the ground shook around him. Skeletons of every sort, from dinosaurs to rats, all appeared, re-animated. The undead seemed to scream a death wail, then all fell apart to dust, They flowed into the blast by some magical gust of wind, and a beam of light appeared where they entered. For a second, nothing happened. For a second.

Then the Flamer was suddenly staring down a grey blast by his nose.

"SHIT! TOO CLOSE!" He screamed, no longer holding back. Ash gasped as the Flamer's beam now danced in front of his nose. The energy crackling almost tickled him, but the lightning whipping his face ruined the experience. He closed his eyes, then screamed for help,

The authors all gathered in a circle. They looked up, hearing Ash's voice.

The fans of Ash the Wanderer everywhere looked up as they heard a voice in their heads.

Every dragonball character turned to Ash's direction as they listened.

"HEY! STOP PRAISING ME SOME MUCH! YOU WANNA PISS OFF THE FLAMERS?" he screamed

"You wanna write it yourself, you bitch?" Ian muttered under his breath

"WHAT WAS THAT?" Eric screamed

"Uh……shit…….I said……..I'll fix it myself, if you wish…..yeah!" said Ian

"You damn…oh never mind." said Eric, walking into the room and tossing Ian out of the chair.

"Go eat. Endings are my specialty." Eric said, and began to type.

Ash staggered under the Flamer's assault, his face beginning to burn. Can't…hold…no!

Then the beam engulfed Ash and he was tossed backwards with a scream. The sky lit up with fire and then a massive explosion shook the earth, swallowing Ash's scream.

The Flamer stopped his attack, slowly lowering his arms.

Then he threw back his head and laughed in truimph.

"At long last, I have destroyed him! At long last!" The Flamer crowed, floating down to the ground as he blew away the dust. He saw black and headed towards it to see Ash's prone body.

"No more writing Ash. It's for your own good." The Flamer smirked.

Then Ash suddenly sat up, a clicking noise filling the air, and the Flamer found himself staring at the sawed-off barrel of a shotgun.

"Good, bad, as the Ash I named myself after would say, I'm the guy with the gun." Ash said, and fired, blowing the Flamer's head clean off and throwing his body back in a spray of blood. Ash slowly got to his feet and blew the smoke away from the barrel.
"Groovy." Ash quipped. "That should dispell the rumours that I named myself after Ash from Pokemon."

Then there was a growl, and the Flamer floated up as his face reformed.

"CATCH THIS, ASHHOLE!" The Flamer screamed, and thrust out his hands, hurling an expanding orange blast at Ash. Ash threw up his arms to block and the beams engulfed him. Smoke lifted up, and then blew away to reveal Ash, unharmed. He loweed his arms and blinked. The Flamer was gone.

Then he looked up.

The Flamer was floating in the air, one arm up. Above him hovered the largest ball of energy Ash had ever seen. It virtually covered the whole sky, casting shadows over the land. Red and black fire danced on it's massive surface as the Flamer smiled a smile of insanity and destruction.

"You must be removed from writing forever, Nugget. So…BURN IN MY ETERNAL FLAME!" The Flamer screamed, and hurled the ball downward at Ash.

Ashs tood his ground, a golden aura exploding around him as he went SSJ.

"You are the cancer to FF.Net, Flamer. You were formed from insults and jealousy, from cruelty and ignorance, from black, pointless hate. I don't know how many writers you've driven away, how many feelings you've hurt, how many great stories you may have robbed the world of. But you won't break me. No matter what you do, or say, I WILL NEVER STOP WRITING!"

And with that, Ash thrust his hands to the side as blue energy crackled and exploded between his palms, beams of brillant sapphire energy streaming between his fingers.

"KAAAAAAAAA-MEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAAAA-MEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!"

And with that Ash thrust his hands forward, throwing the greatest attack in the DBZ world at the ball. The two struck, Ash's beam pressing against The Flamer's fireball. The Flamer smirked.

"Oh please. You think making a stand redeems you? You're just feeding your ego!" The Flamer taunted, and thrust down his hand. The ball began moving forward again. Ash concentrated and more energy poured down his Kamehameha, again stopping the ball. But the Flamer motioned again, and again the ball began heading towards Ash.

"BURN IN MY FLAME, ASHHOLE! MWAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!"

"Kamehameha!"

Ash's eyes opened in surprise as the new blue beam shot up to add to his, and Ash glanced to the side.

"CHAOZU?"

It was indeed the little mime, looking worse for wear but totally determained.

"I'm sorry Ash. He tricked me, and possessed me, and that led to all this. But I'm free now, and I will help you defeat this monstrousity!"

"What? I thought Ice Queen ripped your pathetic body apart!" The Flamer cursed, and put a little more effort into the ball. It began moving towards the two again.

"Never underestimate what can happen in the world of Dragon Ball Z." said a new voice, and three new forms blurred into existence around Ash. Ash blinked.

"Tynzien?"

"Bingo, my esteemed creator. Just as the mime was tricked, so were we. Now it's payback." The AU saiya-jin said, and thrust his hand to the side. His ally and former enemy, also tricked by the sham, did likewise.

"HEAVEN-SPLITTING VIOLENT LIGHT!"

"GENOCIDE HEAVEN!"

"CHAOS GENOCIDE!"

The three new beams slammed again the ball. The Flamer smirked cruelly.

"Summon all the characters you created you want, Ash. It won't make a difference! In the end, they're just a part of you, and you alone cannot defeat me!"

"But he's not alone."

The Flamer's eyes widened as the authors suddenly began appearing around Ash. Soon, every author that had participated in the Games was there, along with their reprentatives. Ash looked around.

"I thought you hated me?"

"Eh, times change." Chelsee said, taking the last bite of her yam, and then throwing her arms above her head.

"MASENKO!"

Alongside her, Movie 9 Son Gohan appeared and did the same, and two new golden beams of energy flew to join the others. Around Ash, all the authors and representatives erupted into motion as they all charged up for their chosen attacks.

"KAMEHAMEHA!"
"FINAL FLASH!"

"BIG BANG!"

"MAKKANKOSAPPO!"

"FINISH BUSTER!"

"BURNING ATTACK!"

"WOLF WIND!"

"SHIN KIKOUHOU!"

"DEATH BALL!"

"HELL'S FLASH!"

"SUPER SS BOMB!"

"RENZOKOKEN SHINE SHINE MISSILE!"

The Flamer snarled as all the energy slammed into his ball, holding out both his hands as the ball began to be pushed back towards him.

"Pathetic authors! Fine! If you support Ash, you are as bad as him, and you ALL MUST BE DESTROYED!" The Flamer roared, and the ball began to be pushed back again. Ash began to despair. What else can we do?

Then Ice Queen and JAT appeared next to Ash, their faces hard and angry.

"Plenty, Nugget. Like this." Ice Queen said, and thrust her hands to the side. JAT did the same, and between them a glowing white ball appear, shining with effulgence.

"ABSOLUTE ZERO!" Both Ice Queen and JAT screamed, and thrust their arms up to add to the storm of beams hitting the Flamer's ball.

Sweat began beading on the Flamer's face as his ball began to be pushed back again.

"No…as long as you exist…so can I…I cannot be destroyed…I CANNOT!"the Flamer screamed, as Mike Steele stood with his arms crossed.

"Man! I hate when I can't think of a cool blast name! Oh well. STEELE BLAST!!!!!!!!!" he said, unleashing a white blast, adding to the power. A light rain developed.

Hail opened one eye. He was amazed to see the ground. The problem was, he was laying on his back. His head was completely around! He realized the truth and slowly touched his head. Using baby force, he slowly turned his head completely around. Suddenly sitting up, he looked as his burnt and charred flesh was washed away like an outer skin, revealing undamaged flesh. He flexed his arm muscles, then jumped up.

"I don't know…..but I don't care!" he yelled, jumping as he flew forward. He suddenly stopped, seeing several dozen people on the end of one blast, the Flamer on the other.

"…………..God I hate bravery!" he yelled as he punched the Flamer's face. The Flamer didn't move.

"I thought I killed you."

"I thought so, too."

"Quess I'll have to do it AGAIN!" he suddenly yelled, grabbing Hail's neck, squeezing throught his bones.

"Sucker!" wheezed Hail, spitting blood in the Flamer's face. The Flamer looked down, realizing Hail's ruse. He was fueling the blast with only one arm.

And that wasn't enough.

The Flamer's eyes went as wide as they could as he saw his ball of fire heading back towards him.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Then the ball slammed into them, engulfing them in burning energy and carrying them out of the Earth's atmosphere and into space. As the Flamer and Hail thrashed in their agonizing prison, they saw the bright ball of light as he approached the sun. The Flamer opened his mouth and screamed.

"YOU RIPPED OFF MOVIE 5 AND 10!"

While Hail could only scream, very oddly,

"I WORK AT MCDONALDS!!!!!!!!!"

Then the ball hit the sun and the two vanished as a mammoth explosion shook the whole solar system as the combined Omni-Blast from everyone exploded. The Earth shook slightly, and then was still.

And back on the ground, all the authors lowered their arms, tired but saitisfied. Ash sighed, then smirked.

"Maybe so, but seeing how you like fire so much, LAMER, I thought it would be good for you. Now stay out of my kitchen."

"Did anyone else notice we just happened to KILL MY BROTHER!?!?!?!" screamed JAT.

"YES!!!!! HE'S DEAD!!!! THAT SUCKER'S ROOM IS MINE!!!! WOOHOO!!!! …… I mean, NO!!!!!!!!!" said Ice, pretending to cry.

"Uh…..yeah…….oops……what a great guy Hail, I mean nahognos, I mean, oh, you know what I meant." said Ash

"He is not dead!" said a voice. Every single person turned to see the Talent, young and in great shape. He appeared to be about 20 now!

"What do you mean? And who the hell are you?" demanded Ash, readying for another fight.

"Ha! Easy, god fellow. I introduced myself to Hail. I am the Talent!" he said, briefly explaining himself.

"Woah…can I have another yam?" asked Chelsee. The Talent laughed and produced a yam from his robe, tossing it to the wide-eyed Chelsee.

"Ah! Such life! Which is what Ian is right now. He's just woken up on his bed. Hail may have died, indeed, so did nahognos, but Ian lives on. Don't worry, he's waiting for you. As am I!" said the Talent, suddenly dissapearing in a flash, his laugh fading slowly. The authors all scratched their heads.

"You know, in all that, I almost forget the contest and the games. Who won?" JAT said. Ash and Ice Queen immediately glared at each other.

"No one did." Came Steele's voice, and all the authors looked to him. "It ended in a draw due to outside forces. We have wrecked this world long enough. It is time we returned to our world, to keep doing what we do best: write. Only by doing that can we truly beat the flamers. Let's go home."

Ash glanced back at Ice Queen.

"Don't think this is over, Nugget. I still haven't forgotten the curses and the Chinese food."

"And I haven't forgotten the eating Chaozu and the cancer patient jokes, Ice Cream. No, it ain't over. Not by a long shot. But for now…I am tired. I must rest. Goodbye Chaozu. I'll see you in Atrocities." Ash said.

And with that, Ash put two fingers up and vanished, heading back to the real world.

"Count on it Ash." Ice Queen said, and also vanished.

"The Z Fighters will remember none of this. That is best." Mike Steele said, and vanished. Slowly, all the other authors left, heading back to their homes and their computers.

Ian Wilson woke up on his bed, stretching his muscles. He jumped off his bed and looked in the mirror. Short brown hair, hazel eyes, and a grin greeted him.

"So……I've finally arrived on Earth……"he said as he turned away, eyes glowing an evil red. Next to the bed, in a crystal ball, a miniature Flamer pounded on his clear prison.

The End?

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(There is darkness, and then Ash suddenly appears via a spotlight)

Ash: So, the much-delayed and probably forgotten final part of the Ice Games has come to an end. What started out as a simple fight turned into something far more complicated, involving characters that ahd evolved from various authors here on FF.Net, and stories around those characters. If all thos confuses you, contact Ian, aka nahognos, he can explain it better. I would also like to thank Ian, who did do much of the work while I was busy with Atrocities, although he was not chained to any wall to do it. Very funny Ian, remind me never to give you such control again.

However, it was while during the Ice Games I heard that Ice Queen, aka Becky, was leaving the DBZ section of FF.Net. I have since heard other information that she didn't. Barring a mistake however, she did tell me she was leaving. I think. Well, I think she's gone. I hope I'm wrong. But any way, if she has left, I would like to dedicae these stories to a woman who can truly think of amusing DBZ situations, especially involving cats and curses. Therefore, I have chosen three winners from the Kairoke Contest of the Ice Games, and I hereby dub these awards the Silver Queens.

(Ash holds up an Oscar statue, except Ice Queen is in place of the normal gold guy, and she's done in silver)

Ash: And the winners for the best and more creative song parodies, as well as the funniest, are Galatea, Silver Galaxy, and nahognos!

(Cheers as the three run on stage and take their awards. Galatea and Sivler Galaxy accept their awards and walk off, as Ian walks to the mike.)

Ian: Well well well well well! What do we have here? This is my very first award I've ever won for my writing! This is great! I want to thank my sisters JAT and Icy, love ya! And don't worry bro, you'll be in the next one! But while I have the mike, I want to confess something. There is no Billy Butt 69.

I confess, I made him as a prank, a practical joke. Most of you don't even know who he was, anyway. Basically, I picked the most absolutely brain-damaged name ever, and posted statements which were the exact opposite of what I really think. If anyone took offense, I'm sorry. Chelsee, I know you gave me a good lecture in the review, and thanks. Don't let flamers get away with that!

Some people figured out the secret of Billy Butt 69. I want to say good detective work Ice Queen! Ash, my friend, maybe next time. I guess women really are smarter than men! No offense, guys! But I want to formally retire the idea of Billy Butt 69 here and now. If you see someone bashing a good piece of work for whatever reasons they have in real life, don't review their stories. Don't read any of their other stories! Silence is approval, and bashing is giving them what they want! The best situation is to tell Xing about the Flamer. Xing, if you're reading this, you da man!

Now, efore we get reviews like:

ThAt StOrY SuCkEd NaHoGnOs iS gAy

Just know that I worked long and hard on this while Ash bled to death working on Atrocities. Don't worry, though, he's ok! Well, he's not, but we ordered a new Ash, he should get here any day now. Ash and I might post a Q&A, maybe some outtakes, a list of authors with their storied listed, my personal fav song parodies, interviews, whatever you want if you want it! THANK YOU! FREE TIBET! I WORK AT HOOTERS!…….McDonalds! I said McDonalds!

(nahognos is shoved off stage as Ash takes the mic)

Ash: Well, that's all folks! And hey Ice Queen, if you ever wanna come back to the DBZ section of FF.Net, you're more then welcome! I need someone to curse! Bye bye!

(Spotlight widens to show all the authors and their representatives waving goodbye, and hoping they're not making fools of themselves because of misinformation. Fade out)