I have recently noticed that there are no REALLY funny scenes with Hermione and Ron under the mistletoe, just fluffy ones. I always imagined that they would get really teed off. And so, this is my interpretation of the favorite theme with Hermione and Ron under the mistletoe. This one is in fifth year, like most of the others. R, R & R.

Disclaimer: Don't own, don't care. Actually, I do (care that is), but that's not the point, is it?

Chapter 1: Ron and Hermione

Hermione's P.O.V.

Ron was confused. "Why are you smiling like that? And why are we leaving without waiting for Harry?" he asked, in a state of confusion. I smiled back at him as if smiling at a mentally handicapped child.

"Why do you think Cho hung back? And I am smiling because I was RIGHT." I said, walking proudly on and leaving Ron stunned. I stopped after a moment, walked back to him, and glared, although he kept staring into space. Then something seemed to click in his head.

"OH! Why didn't you just say so, then?" he asked, his ears going a lovely shade of red that clashed horribly with his hair.

"Because it was so blatantly obvious, that's why." I snapped, making him glare back at me.

"Well I'm SORRY little miss know-it-all, but not all of us get everything the moment it happens to stroll by!" he yelled back, making me exceptionally mad yet again.

"THAT'S BECAUSE YOU WOULDN'T KNOW IT IF IT DANCED AN IRISH JIG IN FRONT OF YOU AND SLAPPED YOU REPEATEDLY!" I yelled back just as loudly or more, making a group of people who were passing us giggle.

Ron opened his mouth with a clear intention to yell something degrading right back, then paused and looked at the ceiling. This was odd, seeing as Ron never backed down from one of our fights. I huffed and glanced up quickly, then back again. I froze, then looked back slowly this time, a look of utter horror on my face. "Ahhh, I see you've found our magic mistletoe, then!" Said either Fred or George, stepping out of the shadows with his identical twin right behind. Ron gaped at them, his chin bobbing up and down like a fish. It was quite hilarious, despite the circumstances.

"Well, go on then, you don't have all day! Neither do we for that matter." The other twin said, grinning while rubbing his hands together.

"Come on, Ickle Ronnikins! Not got the guts to kiss Granger, have you? Oh tut, tut, I suppose you'll just have to stay under there forever then. We've put up a burrier, see." He said with a mock sigh. He then nudged the other (was it Fred?), who took out a camera and gave us a thumbs up. That was when Ron snapped.

"YOU FOUL GITS! LET US GO!" he yelled, then started to pound his fists against the walls. I, having just snapped out of a temporary lapse of articulation, joined in yelling, "RELEASE US! I WILL TAKE AWAY HOUSE POINTS FOR THIS! I MEAN IT!" "Ah, naughty, naughty, Granger threatening to take away house points again? Well no matter if you suck us dry; we can't release you from the mistletoe! We put an unbreakable curse on, and we can't…well…break it, not even if we wanted too." Said a twin.

The other one joined in saying, "Which we don't."

"Much too fun."

"And profitable." the one with the camera said, wiggling the camera in his hand.

Ron and I had stopped banging on the shield, and glanced sideways at each other, panting. "Yeah, that's right! The tension! Ahhh, we could make a living off this!" #1 said, shaking his head at us and sighing. #2 nodded, then wiggled his camera and said, "Remember, we ARE Fred." Ron glanced at me sideways, and I noticed that he was almost glowing red.

"I suppose we'd better get this done with then," I said, turning to Ron, then looked back at the twins, "and NO pictures."

"Pity. Lee was willing to pay big bucks for one! Not to mention the other half of the school, including some OUTSIDE the school." Fred said, sighing in defeat. I glared.

"Alright then…We'd give you a share of the profit!" George said hopefully.

"NO!" Ron and I yelled in unison, making the twins laugh with delight at our antics.

We waited for a moment, then Fred said, "Well, go on, then! Harry will be out soon! And if he's not…well…THAT would be something that I wouldn't want to know about, if you catch my drift." He finished with a wiggle of his eyebrows, making me scowl and shake my head in annoyance.

Ron and I then turned to face each other, extremely embarrassed. "It has to be a nice LONG snog, though. We made it so that if it was less than thirty seconds, you would have to do it all over again!" George cut in, making Ron and me scowl in unison. I then awkwardly placed my hands on Ron's shoulders as he placed his hands on my waist. I tried to keep my emotions in check (not to mention my temper, those twins were SO ENFURIATING) as Ron leaned down. Suddenly, my mind went blank. When I tried to find out why, I realized that Ron had already swooped down and was kissing me (or snogging me as the twins, may they burn in Hades forever, said). I then melted into Ron's arms (stop teasing me! I've been waiting for this since third year!) and forgot about everything else. I had no idea how much I had wanted this...well...I actually did, but it was just really surprising. Oops. Trail of thought lost...must...go...towards...the light. Ugh. I have never been so utterly thought-less in my entire life. Ahh...Wait! Must hold on to sanity! Mmm. Sanity can go take a flying leap, I LIKE being crazy!

Ron's P.O.V.

Ahh...

No one's P.O.V.

Ron and Hermione didn't notice it, of course, but the twins were snapping pictures rather gleefully, without a speck of notice from them. When they thought they had enough, they smirked one last time at the snogging not-quite-couple, then went to develop the pictures. "Do you think they even noticed?" George asked Fred as they left.

Fred looked rather amusedly at George, then grinned wickedly and asked, "Dunno, but I know one good way to find out…"

Hence, five minutes later, Hermione and Ron were chasing after Fred and George (screaming bloody murder as went) for full-mooning them. And you thought high school was crazy.

*cackles* Now THAT was fun to write. It's not like those other fluffy barf-tastic fics that don't know when to stop. Not that all of them are bad, or anything, it's just nice to have a break. So, just in case you haven't noticed, there is a little button. And it's calling to you…SO ANSWER THE BEEPING CALL! Also, I have been fiddling around with my profile and have added a poll (Fred or George). So if you could check them out, and give me pointers, I would be MUCH obliged.

Thank you for your support! Oh yeah, and Happy Christmas (even though it's May) everyone!

-Miriflowers

P.S. If you like Hermione/Draco or any more of that nonsense, you can take a flying leap for all I care!

P.P.S. Hello again! I just found a mistake and corrected it today! Yay me! Anywho, I was just wondering if I should make this into a sort of multi chapter thing with all the other canon couples of your choice! All you have to do is mention them in a review, and I'll try to get to them! But remember, only canon couples will be accepted. Non-canon couples such as Draco/Ginny (*shiver* Who ever thought of them anyway? It creeps me out!) will NOT be listened to. Furthermore, for the sheer offensiveness of asking me for that pairing, I will delete your review and will not listen to you anymore. However, I WILL accept Neville/Luna, because they're SO infinitely sweet! Thank you all SO much for the 10 reviews! It makes me very happy to see that you all like me!

P.P.P.S. I think I might just go ahead and write the Neville/Luna one, because I have a truly superb idea for it! But I also have a GREAT idea for a Harry/Ginny one too...Oh well, whichever one I post first you'll have to deal with. PLEASE review!