Solstice

Editor: Sora Issabella Lupin-Black (As usual, thanks a million.)

It was June 21st, 7:45 a.m.

What was supposed to be a day of delectation and delight for the arrival of summer and the end of the school year, became a day of sorrow and pain for the loss of a loved one.

Attending my best friends' funeral today was not part of my plan to begin the summer holiday.

I never thought the day would come that I would have to burry Sirius Black, the greatest mischief-maker in Hogwarts.

As I was sitting down on what used to be his bed side in Gryffindor common room, I began thinking of the night he died.

And as I thought of that terrible night, tears began rolling down my face.

It was such a horrific scene, watching Sirius die right before my eyes.

At one point he was jumping around and enjoying his birthday party so much that you'd think he was a biathlete who won gold in a relay, than he suddenly dropped half dead without so much as a single groan.

I remember looking into his beautiful gray eyes and watching them dilate and become unresponsive.

The very recollection of the event was so painful that I thought my ribs had punctured my heart, stomach and lungs and I began to double over.

Thank God they hadn't.

I couldn't remember all of what happened that night.

I don't think I wanted to.

But if there was one part of that night that I remember as clear as day, it would have to be this one:

"Come on Padfoot you're going to be alright. Please stay with me, stay with me!"

"Mr. Lupin." said Mdme Pomfrey in a hurried manner. "I need you to stay here with Sirius and update me on anything that happens to him while I'm gone."

"Mdme Pomfrey where are you going!" I questioned loudly.

"To get my anti-cardiac dysfunction elixir!" She yelled back.

At that moment she began running off.

I looked into Sirius' eyes, they were wide open with fear.

"Sirius, you're awake!" I exclaimed.

"What's... happening..." His question was a mixture of crying and airless gasping.

"You're going into cardiac arrest! Don't talk, you'll lose your breath! " I said imperatively.

"What's... happening..." Again his question was a solution of crying and airless gasping only this time there was more gasping and less crying.

Had I known that Sirius was about to die right then and there, I would have thought of something better to say.

"Sirius! I believe in you and I know that your not going to die on me but I just want to say... Happy birthday!"

Tears began to form a waterfall down my face.

I stared into Sirius' eyes again, only to find that they weren't staring back.

"Sirius?"

No response.

Happy Birthday was the last thing I said to my best friend right before he died.

It haunts me every night.

More than the fact that he died on his birthday.

More than the fact that I had acted foolishly and waited almost two minutes to get him to the hospital wing.

And more than the fact that I was holding his hand and looking into his eyes while his spirit departed from his body.

Why did he have to go?

Why did he have to leave me here in this corrupt world?

Why couldn't he bring me with him?

These were the questions I asked myself every day.

And these same questions I know will never be answered, for the only one who can truly answer them is lying in a casket waiting for his funeral service to begin.