A Lesson in Love

Disclaimer: I do not own Fushigi Yugi or any of its characters, etc, etc ^ ^

Miaka walked to the pond, hoping to catch a few moments alone before breakfast. As she reached the water's edge she saw Chichiri sitting in his usual place, meditating. She smiled watching him. He looked so peaceful. She wished she could find that peace. It seemed that someone was always demanding her attention. Especially Tamahome. She sighed and sat down, still looking Chichiri. It was strange, put she seemed to find a certain peace herself, just watching him. She brought her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on her knees. She closed her eyes, the image of Chichiri still behind her eyelids. Suddenly, she felt a shadow over her and opened her eyes to look up.

"Chichiri…" She said smiling. He always seemed to be there when she needed him most.

"Good morning. " He said brightly, sitting down beside her. "You sure are up early y'know."

"Not hard to do when you haven't slept much the night before." Miaka said, a small giggle in her voice. "You always look so peaceful out here, Chichiri. I thought maybe I could find a little peace this morning." She blurted out.

Chichiri blushed slightly, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you y'know." He said, starting to stand.

Miaka put a hand on his arm stopping him. "Oh, I didn't mean you were disturbing me. I just meant that I wanted to get away from everyone else for a while. I never feel that way around you." She blushed, not believing what she had just said.

"What had you up all night, Priestess?" Chichiri asked, changing the subject.

"Oh…well….you see, I have a problem…" Miaka began to say, then stopped, gazing up at the morning sky. "I…I don't love Tamahome anymore. I'm in love with someone else." She said quickly, a dark blush staining her face. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye. How could she possibly tell him that he was the one she now loved? She smothered a soft sigh, resting her chin on her knees once more and looking out over the still pond. He thought of her as the Priestess of Suzaku and nothing else. She doubted he even noticed that she was a woman.

Chichiri frowned behind his mask. He knew things had been different between Miaka and Tamahome lately, but had no idea Miaka felt this way. Thinking back on the past few weeks, he now noticed little things he hadn't before. The way Miaka always seemed to pull away when Tamahome tried to touch her, how she never sat close to him anymore and they never seemed to be alone together. Despite that behavior, he couldn't remember any actions to betray her feelings for anyone else. He only knew that it was not he that she loved. She thought of him as a big brother at most. She would be amazed to discover his feelings for her had grown into a love that scared him.

"Does this other person know?" He asked quietly. Miaka shook her head lightly, keeping her gaze on the water. "Why haven't you told him y'know?"

Miaka shrugged slightly "I don't think it would do much good, Chichiri. I'm pretty sure he doesn't feel the same way, and never will." A lone tear ran down her cheek and she brushed it away almost angrily.

"Well, have you at least told Tamahome how you feel?" Chichiri sighed when he saw Miaka shake her head once again. "It's not fair to him y'know. You may not love him anymore, but I'm sure he still feels the same was about you y'know."

Miaka turned her head to look at him, "I know…How do I tell him though, Chichiri? He wants me to marry him. I don't know if I can bring myself to hurt him like that…" She tilted her head slightly, "Would you take off your mask?" She asked suddenly. She blushed and looked away, shocked that she had asked him that. "I'm sorry….It…It's just that it's hard to talk to you seriously when you always have a happy smile on." She babbled, studying her hands. She looked back and was surprised to see him holding his mask, a small smile on his handsome face.

"No need to apologize y'know." He said quietly.

Miaka stared at him, unable to think of anything to say. She rarely saw him without his smiling mask on, and was always unable to do anything but stare at him when he had it off. Her eyes ran over his features, resting on the scar over his eye. It broke her heart to see that scar, knowing how and why he had gotten it. It also made her love him more….for his good heart and the love she knew he was capable of. "Why do you close yourself off?" She heard herself whisper. "Why do you shut people out of your heart? There are many that love you, Chichiri." She heard him suck in a sharp breath as her hand came up to trace the scar. "You are wise about so many things…and so ignorant about others. Can't you see? Can't you see that I…"

"Miaka!" Nuriko called out a distance from them. "What are you doing out there? Aren't you going to breakfast?"

"Be there in a sec, Nuriko!" Miaka replied, pulling her hand quickly away from Chichiri's face. She looked into his eyes and saw the shock in his eyes. She blushed furiously and looked away. "I'm sorry, Chichiri. I shouldn't have said those things….forget I said anything. Thanks for listening to me!" She said, quickly getting to her feet and running into the palace.

Chichiri sat there by the water, his mask forgotten in his shaking hands. It couldn't be. He had to have been imagining things. Miaka could not have been about to say she loved him. He stared at the place she had been sitting as if he could conjure her up with his thoughts. What she had said was true. He had shut others out. He had been alone for so long that he didn't know how to let anyone in now. He was so used to his mask hiding his thoughts and feelings. He shook himself, starting to stand. She pitied him that was all. At least that's what he told himself. He couldn't allow himself to hope that she might return his feelings, even a little.

Miaka stood outside her room, leaning against the railing and looking up at the stars. She couldn't believe she almost told Chichiri how she felt this morning. He probably thought she was crazy. She had been avoiding him all day, afraid to face him now. She heard footsteps approaching her and turned to see Hotohori walking towards her.

"Miaka, have you seen Chichiri this evening?" He asked, approaching her. She shook her head lightly. "That's strange. I have been looking for him everywhere. He has been acting strangely all day. He had spoken of leaving for a while, but I did not think he would leave so abruptly."

Miaka gasped and shook her head once more. She turned and ran, ignoring Hotohori's calls behind her. It couldn't be true. Chichiri wouldn't leave simply because of what she had said. She ran to the pond, where they had been sitting that morning. On the ground was Chichiri's hat. He was no where in sight. Miaka fell to her knees beside the hat and picked it up, holding it to her chest.

"Oh Chichiri…" She said softly, tears running down her face. "Why did you leave? What do I do now? You're the only thing that made my life worth living here. I love you, Chichiri." She sat there for what seemed like hours, his hat cradled against her chest. She finally set it on the ground gently and stood, turning to head back to the palace.

"Miaka…" She heard someone say behind her. She froze not wanting to turn around, afraid if she did she would find it was only her imagination. She felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her shoulders and a solid body press itself against hers. She closed her eyes and leaned back, tears running down her cheeks. "I left because you were right. I have shut myself off from everyone y'know. I'm tired of being alone. And I'm tired of shutting out the one I love y'know." The arms turned her around and she looked up at Chichiri's face. "I love you, Miaka." He said softly as he lowered his head to hers, kissing her gently.